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High Stakes: 5 Facts About Branches of Darkmeyer

Posted by Troacctid, in Reviews, Lists, Humor, Runescape 01 September 2011 · 2,454 views

news runescape rewards quests updates ranged woodcutting review
Light spoiler warning.









1. Vanstrom Klause is a jerk.

He's killed me like eight times already. And he's organizing genocidal atrocities. And he gloats mercilessly about it. It's like if you crossed a Bond villain with Adolf Eichmann and the dog from Duck Hunt, and then gave him superpowers and made him drink blood. What a bastard.


2. The Blisterwood tree is disgusting.

Seriously, look at that thing. And it throbs. It's like a tree made entirely out of zits. I mean, just...eww. Posted Image

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3. Why are there so many goddamn vyre corpses?

Okay, I'm sorry, but this is just ridiculous. Can we get these things to stack in the bank properly, please? Yeesh!

Posted Image

You might say it's a pain in the neck. :shades:


4. It's really easy to become a Vyrelord.

Two-thirds of Darkmeyer has been trying its whole unlife to gain enough status to become a Vyrelord or Vyrelady. They've been working for years. It took me less than an hour. If it's this easy, you'd think they'd all have made it to the top level by now. What exactly are they doing with their time? *imagining*

"Eh, I could accomplish my life's ambition before lunch today...nah, American Idol is on, I'll do it tomorrow."

"Hmm, I'd really like to be a wealthy aristocrat with status and privilege far beyond my current social stature...ooh, look! A monkey! Haha, it's so cute! ...Huh, I lost my train of thought. Oh well, back to flying around in circles. Whee!"

On second thought, maybe I don't want to know.


5. Blisterwood weapons kick ass.

Seriously.

I can walk up to a Vyrewatch with my no pots, no prayer, and 85 ranged, and do this:

Posted Image

Now that's what I call staking it to the man! :shades:




Vyres aren't efficient, goal oriented adventurers :shades:
I can't seem to read much of your blog, your blog superimposes itself on top of this entry....

Vyres aren't efficient, goal oriented adventurers :shades:

Being backed by the effective vyre queen helps a bit too.

I can't seem to read much of your blog, your blog superimposes itself on top of this entry....

That's weird.

Try changing the theme and see what happens.
Having the same problem but I can read most of it at least.
Why is your tree pink lol??

Thanks for the gif by the way. Now I really wanna try this... But with 99 Ranged, Rigor, ext and Void!!
And I'm sure if I burned 500 the damage would be even more massive.
Possibly 400-500 at 7-speed?
Now if only they had actual drops...
Best blog on tif the internet, it's actually the only one I'll try to regularly read.
I hit a 974 with the polarm. If you take your 308 max with the stakes you'll find a max of around 500-600 with maxed gear, at dart speed. One thing though: the damage distribution doesn't seem to be uniform.

Having the same problem but I can read most of it at least.Why is your tree pink lol??Thanks for the gif by the way. Now I really wanna try this... But with 99 Ranged, Rigor, ext and Void!!And I'm sure if I burned 500 the damage would be even more massive.Possibly 400-500 at 7-speed?Now if only they had actual drops...

Isn't it pink for you too?

The Vyrelords and Vyreladies in Darkmeyer do drop death and fire runes pretty frequently, and of course you can cremate the vyre corpses, which does give prayer xp and decent drops.

I'm really not sure what's up with this bug in the blog. I'll try changing the layout. I wonder if it's caused by an ad?
It's mostly right now, with only your clan banner thing covering Missingno's avatar, lol.
About to check how many burns I have and go test max with stakes :D...
I think my tree was yellowish white by the way.
Yeah tree is not pink:
Posted Image
Well, the tree turns pink once you restore it to health, I think.
Didn't for me stayed white, to match the white log it gives
Looks like you have lighting effects off. Try turning them on.

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About the author

Troacctid began adventuring in Runescape in early 2007, and has since traveled all across Gielinor and accumulated healthy amounts of knowledge, wealth, and power. She enjoys undermining evil world-domination schemes, defending the innocent from oppression, wrestling sharks out of the water with her bare hands, and Magic: The Gathering. Her friends call her "Pi".

The name "troacctid" is an acronym for "The Ratio of A Circle's Circumference To Its Diameter" which of course is Pi. Hence the nickname.

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