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"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice


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#19221
RpgGamer
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You do you boo


But I don't understand why you have such polar emotional responses to one another.
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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.




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#19222
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Ok so... is it wrong to put my own feelings ahead of someone else's happiness?

 

An old friend of mine and I reconnected about 7 months ago, and we've gotten to be really good friends again after not speaking for about 5 years. We generally spent several hours a week talking and/or hanging out, like friends do I suppose. I've felt happier these past 7 months than I have in years having a good friend back in my life that I can share almost everything with without feeling judged etc. However, this past month or so I've began having very bi-polar feelings towards her. Some days I feel happy, other days I feel very angry, depressed, malevolent because of her. I couldn't take it anymore, so I basically cut off all contact with her. My mental state sort of went back to it's not really happy not really sad state. However, I found out that she's been very upset about the whole thing (rightfully so I suppose) and has been feeling depressed, angry, sad, and some days physically ill because I've stopped communicating with her.

 

What do I do? I feel like shit knowing that I'm hurting one of the few people I care about and I don't feel very happy (I feel quite sad a lot of the time actually). If I were to try to re-mend our friendship, her state would improve drastically, but mine would dip back down and go back to feeling violently angry several hours of the day again.

 

Do I stay the course or clear my conscience? 

 

Nothing about this story makes any sense.

 

Do you get mood swings with everyone?

If yes why aren't you managing your mood disorder?

If no what is it about your relationship with her that is causing it? 

 

But the snarky answer I could give you is your problem would probably solve itself if you copy pasted this post and sent it to your friend. 

 

I hope there is more to this post because it reads like a self entitled person who has grown bored with someone and abuses and abandons them as it is convenient. 



#19223
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1. No, only her.

 

2. It has more or less been a somewhat recent development. Sometimes (like once or twice a year) I get super upset about something and feel absolutely shitty for like a day or two, then I'm over it. However, it has never lasted this long before. I've actually been considering seeing someone if it continues past July.

 

3. I really have no clue. I know that I'm a petty person, but I can't really even think of a stupid reason why I should be upset. 

 

4. Did that like 2 days after I stopped talking to her. I wrote her a note explaining how I felt and why I did what I did.

 

 

 

I think part of this is all just bad timing. One of her best long time friends got sent to jail last month with no idea of when she'll be out. Her main group of friends from school had sort of a falling out, and they all stopped wanting to talk and hang out with each other, even the people they weren't mad with. (which I don't understand, but w/e). She also lives with her parents while she is going to school because she can't afford to live on her own, and her relationship with her dad is somewhat strained. 

 

So outside of her boyfriend (who I get the impression is absolute shit at holding meaningful conversation, and isn't always comforting), she was probably using me as a crutch socially/mentally.

 

 

 

You're not wrong about the self entitled part, I'll admit that. I take a lot of my friends for granted, and I'm not always the best at reciprocating effort put into mutually beneficial relationships. She's basically my only friend who takes much interest in a lot of my hobbies. I also enjoy(ed) doing stuff with her, so I wouldn't fall under the 'grown bored' camp.

 

 

 

I think part of my problem is that I have an extremely repetitive, boring, and braindead job, so I spend hours at a time just stewing over this as I've got nothing else to put my brain power in to. I probably wouldn't care or dwell over it as much as I have (thus reducing my stress about this) if I weren't spending 6+ hours a day without something mentally stimulating to distract me.


19509_s.gif

 

“I had a feeling we weren’t coming back from this fight when it began.”

“Do you have any regrets?”

“I don’t. It seems surprising, I know, but I wouldn’t change a thing. This is how it was meant to be.”

“Huh, you never really notice how lovely the day is until you realize you’ll never see it again.”

“Mmmhmm.”

 


#19224
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I mean I can understand someone your friends with suddenly clinging onto you tightly and feeling like your suffocating because of them. If that was the cause of your annoyance with her that makes sense.

 

As far as advice I think you did the best thing you could do by telling her how you feel about it and seeing what sorts of reactions she gives based on what your saying.



#19225
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had my first tinder date in a year yesterday. Met up with the girl for coffee, then we walked through pike's marketplace and watched the ocean for a while before she had to leave to go to work (this all happened from 8 am - 9:30 am lmao). she was super receptive to touching and touched back throughout the thing and we kissed goodbye, so that makes this my first kiss where both parties were sober lmfao. she said she wants to meet up again, i was thinking about taking her to this laser show thing where you can like lay on the floor and watch these crazy visuals to music so I figured it would make a good segue into coming back to my place after but idk if I should just not wait so long and invite her right over because she basically said she was dtf at the end of the date lol. idk I never really make it this far so I'm probably overcomplicating it but it just feels real [bleep]ing nice for things to finally be working out haha



#19226
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I was typing a thing and then I decided I disagreed with myself. Be the best you and take her to the laser show unless YOU WANT to get down with her before then, however far away it may be. Just don't allow her to lose interest as in, don't disappear on her
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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.




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#19227
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"Ifa ***** steals yo gurl, he doin you a favor"
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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.




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#19228
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Are you just drunk or did a ***** steal yo gurl?


19509_s.gif

 

“I had a feeling we weren’t coming back from this fight when it began.”

“Do you have any regrets?”

“I don’t. It seems surprising, I know, but I wouldn’t change a thing. This is how it was meant to be.”

“Huh, you never really notice how lovely the day is until you realize you’ll never see it again.”

“Mmmhmm.”

 


#19229
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Nah, I wanted to demonstrate the thread isn't dead.
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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.




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Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

#19230
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Are you with your person and theres a serious problem that will likely only get worse?

Then you should probably break up

 

 

Are you single with a minimal friend group and you never go out and meet new people?
Then you should probably get a set group of friends who enjoy going out to places and try talking to new people when you are out

 

 

- 99% of this thread



#19231
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Are you with your person and theres a serious problem that will likely only get worse?
Then you should probably break up


Are you single with a minimal friend group and you never go out and meet new people?
Then you should probably get a set group of friends who enjoy going out to places and try talking to new people when you are out


- 99% of this thread

But you guys always give blanket advice and my situation is different somehow where neither of those statements are true.

~99% of replies.

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#19232
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Meh, me good.


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#19233
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Asking for relationship advice on a runescape forum



#19234
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Did you equip full rune?
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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.




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#19235
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Did you make sure to add effects when you were advertising for a girlfriend.

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#19236
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I paid 3k for a hot gf and it turned out it was a dude  <_<

 

spent over 3 hours killing chickens for that cash



#19237
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Did you get a gold ring for her/him?


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#19238
insperation.09
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I paid 3k for a hot gf and it turned out it was a dude  <_<

 

spent over 3 hours killing chickens for that cash

 

On the plus side, you now know the in's and out's of slaying chickens, AND, you know you're not in to dudes. Hooray for self discovery!


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#19239
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I'm gonna breathe some life in this thread and ask what typical (healthy) coping mechanism ya'll use for stressful situations or to soothe anxiety. I know physical exercise is a big one, particularly with some but I'm interested to hear what else you guys do. Work on your car? Build something? Let's hear it.


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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.




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#19240
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I'm gonna breathe some life in this thread and ask what typical (healthy) coping mechanism ya'll use for stressful situations or to soothe anxiety. I know physical exercise is a big one, particularly with some but I'm interested to hear what else you guys do. Work on your car? Build something? Let's hear it.

 

You play D&D, right?  I like to work out ideas for campaigns, think of interesting plot lines, etc.  Most of it is just stuff in my head, not on paper and never actually ends up at the table. It's a good calming distraction for me.

 

I used to go to the rock gym a lot and that was always good for me, since it was a good blend of physical and mental.

 

These are more for chronic stress and anxiety, not exactly for "in the moment" anxiety attack sorts of things. 


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