Jump to content

"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice


Da_Latios
 Share

Recommended Posts

 

 

The better advice, to everybody not just LDR, is to be prepared for the worst.

 

Don't put all your chips on the table. Put all your chips in a table with your hands still on them.

Being a pessimist isn't always the solution.

Just like playing only defensive soccer doesn't score you any goals.

 

I dunno, I just think there is a balance to not put so much trust and investment in a relationship, especially if it's LDR, but on the flip side, relationships need both of those things to last, so that advice can only go so far.

 

That's not being pessimistic, that's being realistic.

 

When it comes to LDRs (or any sort of relationship for that matter, but LDRs especially), you must consider the opportunity cost of it.

 

As far as Gabe goes, keep in mind that he's still in the irrationally optimistic Disney stage of the relationship and will probably remain that way for at least the next six months or so :P

 

I decided to dig this post up from June 26 which was page 771 just to give an update to the relationship.

 

Update: Everything in the relationship is going wonderful. We text everyday and Skype every few days. We hit our 1 year anniversary today. I saw her for Thanksgiving, Winter break, and I will see her in 3 weeks for Spring break and then Summer break. 

 

It's been 7 months since you posted this Muggie. Things are working out strongly.

sig2-3.jpg

 

Three months banishment to 9gag is something i would never wish upon anybody, not even my worst enemy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I said you're going to remain in this state of mind for at least the next 6 months, and then 6 months later, you stop by again and confirm that you're still in this state of mind lol

Like I said, these kinds of things are fine in the short-term but don't hold your breath for the long-term

77yLQy8.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I said you're going to remain in this state of mind for at least the next 6 months, and then 6 months later, you stop by again and confirm that you're still in this state of mind lol

 

Like I said, these kinds of things are fine in the short-term but don't hold your breath for the long-term

 

But according to statistics, I passed the period where long distance relationships have the highest break up chances. In fact, at this point, relationships that are not long distance have higher chances of breaking up than those who are in long distance relationships.

sig2-3.jpg

 

Three months banishment to 9gag is something i would never wish upon anybody, not even my worst enemy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think the girl at work definitely likes me.

 

Went to work yesterday and she was constantly looking over at me, would call me over to ask how I'm doing, go out of her way to come in my line, flirt with me when I'm bagging groceries, would look back at me and jokingly shake her head when I talk into the intercom.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

I said you're going to remain in this state of mind for at least the next 6 months, and then 6 months later, you stop by again and confirm that you're still in this state of mind lol

 

Like I said, these kinds of things are fine in the short-term but don't hold your breath for the long-term

 

But according to statistics, I passed the period where long distance relationships have the highest break up chances. In fact, at this point, relationships that are not long distance have higher chances of breaking up than those who are in long distance relationships.

 

 

I really don't want to have to restate my case on here for the nth time...

 

I'm not necessarily cautioning you about breakups. I'm cautioning you about unhappiness. Two close friends of mine are/were in long-distance relationships. One friend's now married and they live together... except he's unhappy because his marriage costs him his freedom. He works all day, then he isn't allowed to go hang out with his friends afterwards because his wife will give him drama for not hanging out with her instead.

 

The other friend is still in a long-distance relationship, though for a year they lived together. He's the same friend I mentioned earlier whom hasn't had sex with his girlfriend for almost two years now because she gained so much weight and has become really [bleep]y.

 

 

Just because a couple doesn't break up doesn't mean that their relationship is a success. Even if you two don't break up any time soon, there's still an extremely high chance that at least one of you will become unhappy for reasons that are beyond your control. Women are biologically wired to get bored of their monogamous partner past a certain point anyways.

77yLQy8.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This almost sounds like the glass half full/empty argument though. I could live for the moment or I could worry about the relationship in the future. 

 

I know you're all about poly relationships Muggie, but are you saying that all monogamous relationships are doomed? 

 

Fun fact: A study shows that women are the happiest when men work about 50 hours a week.

 

Another fun fact: Just because one woman [bleep]es at a certain aspect doesn't mean all other will. I understand that I come off as ignorant, but in the long run, truthfully anything can happen. I like that I don't know what's going to happen. It'd make life boring. 

sig2-3.jpg

 

Three months banishment to 9gag is something i would never wish upon anybody, not even my worst enemy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This almost sounds like the glass half full/empty argument though.

That would be the case if there was a 50-50 marital success rate with no risks/penalties for being in the "unfortunate" 50%.

 

Instead there's a 90% chance you'll be extremely unhappy and a 10% chance you'll be as happy as you could be in a risk-free poly arrangement.

 

I could live for the moment or I could worry about the relationship in the future.

That's great if you're a zen monk who can live in the present moment and appreciate life whenever things seem bad. But you're not. You're just experiencing a pleasant "present moment" at the risk of experiencing an extremely unpleasant "present moment" in the future.

 

I know you're all about poly relationships Muggie, but are you saying that all monogamous relationships are doomed?

I'm not saying all monogamous relationships are doomed-- I'm saying ALL relationships are doomed, including poly ones. If you want a relationship that never ends until you're dead, just wait till you're 60 years old to get married. :thumbup: 

 

Fun fact: A study shows that women are the happiest when men work about 50 hours a week.

IDK what this has to do with anything >_>

 

Another fun fact: Just because one woman [bleep]es at a certain aspect doesn't mean all other will.

 

I understand that I come off as ignorant, but in the long run, truthfully anything can happen.

You're confusing "possibility" with "probability." Just because something can happen (such as long-term monogamy working out for you), doesn't mean that it will happen.

 

 

I like that I don't know what's going to happen. It'd make life boring.

You're choosing an unhealthy way of making your life less boring.

77yLQy8.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Man, I always write these long posts supporting Muggi but then I go severely off-topic and delete the whole thing, only to come back not knowing where to start off again...so I end up with nothing.

 

The only thing I can say at this point is if you are happy now Gabe, good job. Keep it up. But, just be mindful of the (high) possibility of it ending.

  • Like 1

"The cry of the poor is not always just, but if you never hear it you'll never know what justice is."

siggy3s.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

THERES NO SUCH THING AS LOVE EVERYTHING DIES AND ENDS AND YOU'LL ALL BE MISERABLE ABOUT IT UNTIL YOU'RE NOT AND THEN YOU START OVER AGAIN

 

(is what this is starting to sound like)

 

This argument is why I dont date very often. Why bother if I'm gonna end up unhappy anyway?

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

Link to comment
Share on other sites

THERES NO SUCH THING AS LOVE EVERYTHING DIES AND ENDS AND YOU'LL ALL BE MISERABLE ABOUT IT UNTIL YOU'RE NOT AND THEN YOU START OVER AGAIN

 

(is what this is starting to sound like)

 

This argument is why I dont date very often. Why bother if I'm gonna end up unhappy anyway?

 

You're not necessarily going to end up unhappy

77yLQy8.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just speaking from the part of my life I'm in (undergrad at a university with 35,000 students), I just can't imagine shutting every other girl out for one at the time being. I enjoy the crap out of the chase. Once the chase is over, I can't help but fade out of their lives pretty quickly, unless the sex is enough to make me stay for awhile longer. Sounds incredibly shallow haha.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just speaking from the part of my life I'm in (undergrad at a university with 35,000 students), I just can't imagine shutting every other girl out for one at the time being. I enjoy the crap out of the chase. Once the chase is over, I can't help but fade out of their lives pretty quickly, unless the sex is enough to make me stay for awhile longer. Sounds incredibly shallow haha.

But ultimately, that's just you. I don't like the chase.

sig2-3.jpg

 

Three months banishment to 9gag is something i would never wish upon anybody, not even my worst enemy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just speaking from the part of my life I'm in (undergrad at a university with 35,000 students), I just can't imagine shutting every other girl out for one at the time being. I enjoy the crap out of the chase. Once the chase is over, I can't help but fade out of their lives pretty quickly, unless the sex is enough to make me stay for awhile longer. Sounds incredibly shallow haha.

It seems plainly ridiculous that RPG is constantly accused of seeking drama, but this kind of comment passes by with no objection.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Just speaking from the part of my life I'm in (undergrad at a university with 35,000 students), I just can't imagine shutting every other girl out for one at the time being. I enjoy the crap out of the chase. Once the chase is over, I can't help but fade out of their lives pretty quickly, unless the sex is enough to make me stay for awhile longer. Sounds incredibly shallow haha.

But ultimately, that's just you. I don't like the chase.

I doubt that I'm the only one in the world who enjoys the chase.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

Just speaking from the part of my life I'm in (undergrad at a university with 35,000 students), I just can't imagine shutting every other girl out for one at the time being. I enjoy the crap out of the chase. Once the chase is over, I can't help but fade out of their lives pretty quickly, unless the sex is enough to make me stay for awhile longer. Sounds incredibly shallow haha.

It seems plainly ridiculous that RPG is constantly accused of seeking drama, but this kind of comment passes by with no objection.

There might be no objections yet because it was posted a mere hour ago...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

Just speaking from the part of my life I'm in (undergrad at a university with 35,000 students), I just can't imagine shutting every other girl out for one at the time being. I enjoy the crap out of the chase. Once the chase is over, I can't help but fade out of their lives pretty quickly, unless the sex is enough to make me stay for awhile longer. Sounds incredibly shallow haha.

But ultimately, that's just you. I don't like the chase.

I doubt that I'm the only one in the world who enjoys the chase.

 

I'm not saying you are. I'm saying that it is not something I enjoy. Also, I'm an undergrad at a university with 50,000 students. 

sig2-3.jpg

 

Three months banishment to 9gag is something i would never wish upon anybody, not even my worst enemy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

THERES NO SUCH THING AS LOVE EVERYTHING DIES AND ENDS AND YOU'LL ALL BE MISERABLE ABOUT IT UNTIL YOU'RE NOT AND THEN YOU START OVER AGAIN

 

(is what this is starting to sound like)

 

This argument is why I dont date very often. Why bother if I'm gonna end up unhappy anyway?

 

You're not necessarily going to end up unhappy

 

 

Nice edit ;)

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I give rpg grief because he says one thing and does another. LL hasn't done that..as long as he's clear about not making a commitment to women, there's nothing "technically" wrong with what he's doing (admittedly I wouldn't do it myself)

polvCwJ.gif
"It's not a rest for me, it's a rest for the weights." - Dom Mazzetti

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

Just speaking from the part of my life I'm in (undergrad at a university with 35,000 students), I just can't imagine shutting every other girl out for one at the time being. I enjoy the crap out of the chase. Once the chase is over, I can't help but fade out of their lives pretty quickly, unless the sex is enough to make me stay for awhile longer. Sounds incredibly shallow haha.

It seems plainly ridiculous that RPG is constantly accused of seeking drama, but this kind of comment passes by with no objection.

Because seeking drama and seeking casual sex aren't the same thing

77yLQy8.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm not offended but what are we referring to specifically when we refer to me saying one thing and doing another?

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.