"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[The_Gabe 166]

I guess I wasn't actually asking for advice. I just wanted to share that story. 

[obfuscator 1005]

I'm glad neither of us did anything we would regret. We just became good friends.

you became good friends who wanted to [bleep]

 

men and women can't be friends

[The_Gabe 166]

 

I'm glad neither of us did anything we would regret. We just became good friends.

you became good friends who wanted to [bleep]

 

men and women can't be friends

 

I disagree. Yes, we might have wanted to get physical. But I've had other female friends that I had no desire to [bleep].

[obfuscator 1005]

okay. keep believing that, and act surprised when you cheat on your girlfriend

[RpgGamer 1088]

You have self control. Congrats

[obfuscator 1005]

You have self control. Congrats

part of self control (a major part) is avoiding situations that will seriously test your self control

[Ring_World 753]

Im sad not one person got the lost reference

[Low Levelled 335]

I guess now is when we talk about how wanting to cheat on your girlfriend is kind of like actually cheating on your girlfriend

[RpgGamer 1088]

Its not. Its being human.

 

And I only watched the first 4 episodes of lost before the ending was spoiled and I lost all interest in continuing

[muggiwhplar 2221]

 

 

I'm glad neither of us did anything we would regret. We just became good friends.

you became good friends who wanted to [bleep]

 

men and women can't be friends

 

I disagree. Yes, we might have wanted to get physical. But I've had other female friends that I had no desire to [bleep].

 

 

Keyword: "had" :P

[Ring_World 753]

In his defence hes not asking for advice. The_gabe has mentioned his preferences before and they work for him even if it runs contrary to a lot of the views on the thread

[obfuscator 1005]

I guess now is when we talk about how wanting to cheat on your girlfriend is kind of like actually cheating on your girlfriend

Not at all. But part of being committed to monogamy is understanding that you have a sex drive and if you don't respect it things many not go well.

[muggiwhplar 2221]

In his defence hes not asking for advice. The_gabe has mentioned his preferences before and they work for him even if it runs contrary to a lot of the views on the thread

 

I don't think anyone's giving him advice >_>

[Low Levelled 335]

Usually when I get to the point where I start wanting to [bleep] other women I get out of whatever situation I'm currently in because I know it's not gonna end well

[Low Levelled 335]

X2 post

[The_Gabe 166]

And I got out of that situation. We both did. We never hung out alone. I'm surprised that self control doesn't come standard with you people

[obfuscator 1005]

And I got out of that situation. We both did. We never hung out alone. I'm surprised that self control doesn't come standard with you people

Self control doesn't "come standard" with anyone. It's something that you have to constantly work at.

 

Just my opinion, but if you got to the point where you were actively discussing being in a relationship with another woman, you didn't have anywhere near a sufficient amount of self control.

[muggiwhplar 2221]

 

And I got out of that situation. We both did. We never hung out alone. I'm surprised that self control doesn't come standard with you people

Self control doesn't "come standard" with anyone. It's something that you have to constantly work at.

 

Just my opinion, but if you got to the point where you were actively discussing being in a relationship with another woman, you didn't have anywhere near a sufficient amount of self control.

 

 

Eh, I'd agree with you here if it wasn't for the fact that they were just on a trip together. I think a lot of people would use the trip as an opportunity to cheat and then somehow convince themselves that it "doesn't matter" or "doesn't count." Since it's impossible for him to really stay in contact with her, and he never actually made any moves or anything like that, I don't really see anything wrong here-- no lapse of self-control imo. It'd be different if he was acting this way towards a girl that he works with or frequently comes into contact with, but I imagine such a situation would never occur in the first place due to self-control. In other words, I think they both understood that there was no chance of anything real actually happening between them since they were just on a trip together.

 

BUT, with that said, I won't be surprised if this has some subtle effects (for better or for worse) on Gabe's relationship now that he has proof that women besides his girlfriend would like to have him as a boyfriend.

[obfuscator 1005]

 

 

 

And I got out of that situation. We both did. We never hung out alone. I'm surprised that self control doesn't come standard with you people

Self control doesn't "come standard" with anyone. It's something that you have to constantly work at.

 

Just my opinion, but if you got to the point where you were actively discussing being in a relationship with another woman, you didn't have anywhere near a sufficient amount of self control.

Eh, I'd agree with you here if it wasn't for the fact that they were just on a trip together. I think a lot of people would use the trip as an opportunity to cheat and then somehow convince themselves that it "doesn't matter" or "doesn't count." Since it's impossible for him to really stay in contact with her, and he never actually made any moves or anything like that, I don't really see anything wrong here-- no lapse of self-control imo. It'd be different if he was acting this way towards a girl that he works with or frequently comes into contact with, but I imagine such a situation would never occur in the first place due to self-control. In other words, I think they both understood that there was no chance of anything real actually happening between them since they were just on a trip together.

 

BUT, with that said, I won't be surprised if this has some subtle effects (for better or for worse) on Gabe's relationship now that he has proof that women besides his girlfriend would like to have him as a boyfriend.

Certainly he did exhibit self control, but it seems as though it was more "the opportunity not being right" than anything.

 

Directly acknowledging your feelings for someone is a big step...and that doesn't come without a lot of flirting and shared intimacy, which is what should have been avoided.

 

As for the effect on his current relationship, that's up to how he acts.

[Estonian dude 238]

I had a few drinks with this student.


Where the bloody [bleep] do such people come from?
So hard-working, tidy, orderly.

She is one year younger than I am. And she had never drank this much beer before. And that was like 100 cc's. She has lived a year in Oslo, and she has never been on a single night out in Oslo.

She is my only contact to the outside world and tonight she only spoke and spoke and spoke.

 

I have noticed her smiling nearly every time she looks at me and she touches me quite often on the shoulder or at the knee, when sitting, but I still can't tell if she is into me or if it is a cultural thing, since she is the forst foreigner I've thought about and I don't know how things are here. Also, while we spoke, she talked about me brothers and family quite a bit. (we all work there together) Even asked why they weren't there.

 

I quite like her but I think I have given really mixed messages. Yet I don't know how to make clear my intentions and not offend or scare her somehow.

[Ring_World 753]

Risk offending or scaring her and if you cross a line tell her you misunderstood the situation because of cultural cues.

[RpgGamer 1088]

She wants it

[Kalphite 167]

>go since whenever the hell i last posted without any remotely attractive tinder matches

>get two hot ones that seem down to meet up the night before i fly out to a music festival for the next five days

 

gg tinder gods

[Nom 25]

Im sad not one person got the lost reference

 

I did. I lol'd, enough that I thought you should know.

 

Hooked up with a girl from Tinder. Also saw Jurassic World with her, which I probably wouldn't have gotten off my ass to do otherwise. So, wins all around.

[The_Gabe 166]

 

 

 

 

And I got out of that situation. We both did. We never hung out alone. I'm surprised that self control doesn't come standard with you people

Self control doesn't "come standard" with anyone. It's something that you have to constantly work at.

 

Just my opinion, but if you got to the point where you were actively discussing being in a relationship with another woman, you didn't have anywhere near a sufficient amount of self control.

Eh, I'd agree with you here if it wasn't for the fact that they were just on a trip together. I think a lot of people would use the trip as an opportunity to cheat and then somehow convince themselves that it "doesn't matter" or "doesn't count." Since it's impossible for him to really stay in contact with her, and he never actually made any moves or anything like that, I don't really see anything wrong here-- no lapse of self-control imo. It'd be different if he was acting this way towards a girl that he works with or frequently comes into contact with, but I imagine such a situation would never occur in the first place due to self-control. In other words, I think they both understood that there was no chance of anything real actually happening between them since they were just on a trip together.

 

BUT, with that said, I won't be surprised if this has some subtle effects (for better or for worse) on Gabe's relationship now that he has proof that women besides his girlfriend would like to have him as a boyfriend.

Certainly he did exhibit self control, but it seems as though it was more "the opportunity not being right" than anything.

 

Directly acknowledging your feelings for someone is a big step...and that doesn't come without a lot of flirting and shared intimacy, which is what should have been avoided.

 

As for the effect on his current relationship, that's up to how he acts.

I think some of you are really reading into this too much. Like way too much.

 

We weren't really actually considering doing anything either. We didn't consider dating. We just acknowledged the fact that we were compatible.

 

I Only did it because it was the end of the trip and I speak my mind. It has no effect on my relationship and I already know I can get other women. I was the guy surrounded by women during that trip. I'm also a sexy man :twss: