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Honestly...


Powman3

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I don't like posting crap like this, but if you guys don't mind caring, tell me what you think about this or if you have similar problems.

 

 

 

My parents basically like to invade my personal life. They say they trust me, but then they have to know everything about what I'm doing and stuff, and that obviously means they don't trust me enough to not do anything [developmentally delayed]ed. They go through my stuff as well sometimes. It ticks me off. Seriously.

 

 

 

Whatever. Maybe I'm outrageously pissed off. I think that's it. I'll be fine later, then. But I'd like to know what you guys think.

 

 

 

Don't get me wrong, I love my folks. They care for me, they cook my food, pay the bills. But I hate it when they have to know EVERYTHING when they say they even trust me.

 

 

 

If you trust me, then you believe I won't do anything wrong, correct?

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I'm in the same situation mate. I still live with my parents, but I'm going to be moving out soon. I do like my parents too and all.

 

 

 

Like me, you're just ticked off that your parents want to know everything.

 

 

 

One of the solutions though is to tell them where you go when you go out, no more details. Then when you comme back, you can choose to tell them (if they ask) that all went good or not.

 

 

 

I think parents are like that because they don't want anything happening to you, that's all, and they care for you. The only problem with that is you don't have the liberty you want, and I think you should talk to your parents for that ;). Most probably they will understand you, but you have to talk to them about that often until they leave you alone ;). Some parents may be hard to convince though.

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They pretty much let me live my life and let me do what i do, the only thing that's annoying is that my mom doesn't like it when my friends come over, and when they do, she sits with us when we're in the couch or outside at the pool and talks with my friends, it's really annoying. She leaves us alone when we're in my room gaming or chilling though.

Some people dream of success, while others make it happen.

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That seems pretty normal except for going through your stuff. My parents are pretty chill but I remember getting like 50 questions every time I went out. :roll: But they did let me go out so I don't really have any complaints.

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They very rarely go through my stuff anymore. But that doesn't mean they don't.

 

 

 

Of course they care, but seriously, they say they trust me yet they have to know the details about where I'm going and they have to talk to my date's mother so she KNOWS WHERE HER DAUGHTER IS.

 

 

 

I'm taking your daughter to a rave, woman. The "we're gonna see the new Batman movie" was all a hoax.

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My parents don't really trust me after I wrecked my old car and got caught with weed. Before that they said they trusted me but I always had a feeling they went through my stuff so I kept anything I didn't want them to see locked up. But whatever. I'm 18 in a little over a month. Doesn't matter if they trust me or not at that point.

 

 

 

As for you, Pow.. You might want to try just talking to them about it. Let them know how they're making you feel and they might back off a little.

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They very rarely go through my stuff anymore. But that doesn't mean they don't.

 

 

 

Of course they care, but seriously, they say they trust me yet they have to know the details about where I'm going and they have to talk to my date's mother so she KNOWS WHERE HER DAUGHTER IS.

 

 

 

I'm taking your daughter to a rave, woman. The "we're gonna see the new Batman movie" was all a hoax.

 

 

 

How old are you? Your parents are just looking out for your best interests, intrusive as it may be. I draw the line at going through your belongings, but just finding out where you're going and what you're doing seems perfectly reasonable.

 

 

 

I suppose this is another example of how lucky I was when I was younger. My mother wouldn't even go in my room.

La lune ne garde aucune rancune.

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I'm fourteen, going to be a freshman.

 

 

 

I had a little temper tantrum when I posted this. But I'm still ticked off about the trust thing.

 

 

 

They say they trust me. But it seems like they don't, obviously.

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I'm fourteen, going to be a freshman.

 

 

 

I had a little temper tantrum when I posted this. But I'm still ticked off about the trust thing.

 

 

 

They say they trust me. But it seems like they don't, obviously.

 

That's because you're still young (especially to their eyes). It seems to me they're only trying to let go of you slowly, giving you small liberties while keeping an eye on you; nothing wrong there. Just try to keep earning their trust and they should stop looking through your things, etc.

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I'm fourteen, going to be a freshman.

 

 

 

I had a little temper tantrum when I posted this. But I'm still ticked off about the trust thing.

 

 

 

They say they trust me. But it seems like they don't, obviously.

 

Most people start going onto the wrong path at that age, hell i still do things that are so dumb that i suprise myself and i'm nearly 18, parents just have to realise that they should give their kids the freedom to do what they want tbh, no extreme things, but just things that makes them realise it's for the best to don't do that again.

Some people dream of success, while others make it happen.

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I'm fourteen, going to be a freshman.

 

 

 

I had a little temper tantrum when I posted this. But I'm still ticked off about the trust thing.

 

 

 

They say they trust me. But it seems like they don't, obviously.

 

 

 

Now it all makes sense.

Your name is "bet you fail", and you're starting a business with your mom? I'm not even going to touch that.....
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Well, its true. We're teenagers, and we're going to be moody and, in general, [wagon]. We can learn from people who've only recently realized that its stupid to overestimate things.

 

 

 

[cabbage], I'm getting mature. I need to go talk about boobs and make some your mom jokes or something.

catch it now so you can like it before it went so mainstream

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Hey, if I wanted advice from idiots I woulda asked.

 

 

 

I asked for advice, not a freaking lesson.

 

 

 

Although what you gave was more along the lines of crap.

 

 

 

No need to be immature... You're only fourteen years old, do you really think you know what's in your best interests?

 

 

 

I don't mean to be harsh, but maybe they'll trust you when you stop throwing tantrums every time that they do what is best for you.

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i just accpted the fact that my parents are over protective, i just leave a note\call them if im leaving and when i think i'll be back, and if there stuff i dont want them to find i keep them hidden, i'll be 18 in less then 2 weeks, and i'll be moving out in less then 4 weeks.

 

 

 

i use to get the "who you be with, where you going, what time you be back..." they slowly started to back off, also i just told them that i dont do drugs, and call if you get worried and they started to back off alot after that

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i just accpted the fact that my parents are over protective, i just leave a note\call them if im leaving and when i think i'll be back, and if there stuff i dont want them to find i keep them hidden, i'll be 18 in less then 2 weeks, and i'll be moving out in less then 4 weeks.

 

 

 

i use to get the "who you be with, where you going, what time you be back..." they slowly started to back off, also i just told them that i dont do drugs, and call if you get worried and they started to back off alot after that

 

 

 

My parents were a lot like that. They backed off when shortly after I turned 17. It was nice to have the freedom but I got into drugs, got busted, and now they call me quite a bit when I'm out. I won't [bleep] about it because I know I'm lucky to be allowed out.

 

 

 

You've really just got to go along with what your parents say and confront them if you really don't like what's going on. And if nothing changes, their word is the law until you're 18. And temper tantrums will not get you anywhere. Just bottle up all that stress and find somewhere to let it out.

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Like people you're bigger than.

 

 

 

Haha. That made me chuckle.

 

 

 

Yeah, I know they care for me.

 

 

 

No need to be immature... You're only fourteen years old, do you really think you know what's in your best interests?

 

 

 

I don't mean to be harsh, but maybe they'll trust you when you stop throwing tantrums every time that they do what is best for you.

 

 

 

I'm not gonna argue with you, but I will point this out.

 

 

 

Nobody knows what's better for me than I myself. Not my parents, just me. You make it seem like I don't have a say in anything just because I'm not LEGALLY an adult. I'm not "a little kid". I'm a mature teenager. Seriously. Maybe you don't think so, but I do respect adults unless I disagree with them, and even most of the time I just keep my mouth shut. And there's no need to tell me what my parents think about me and how they trust me, when you have never met me or my folks at all before.

 

 

 

When I got caught smoking cigs I knew I was lucky enough to be grounded for only two weeks, I even got off early because I was doing very well in school, the best I have done out of all my junior high school years. I have gotten so lucky in life. It's no doubt. I respect, love, and care for my parents. But I don't like it when they and other people say what's best for me. Only I can figure that out, seriously.

 

 

 

EDIT: That's why they're called MY best interests.

 

 

 

By the way, not to kiss-up or anything, but I really appreciate the posts guys. It did shed some light.

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When I got caught smoking cigs I knew I was lucky enough to be grounded for only two weeks...

 

 

 

 

 

Well there's your problem.

 

 

 

 

 

When parents catch their children smoking/doing drugs/having sex, especially in Junior High School, they lose faith in both their parenting skills and their children. This usually means they will become more strict and overbearing to compensate for the lack of attention they paid to you in the past.

 

 

 

You're just going to have to earn back their trust, one step at a time. Trust me, your situation will get even worse if you get angry or lie to them when they ask you questions, or if they find out you disobey them when you're alone. The more you struggle, the tighter their grip will be.

 

 

 

When I was younger, my parents were definately a large presence in my life. However, since I never lied to them when I went out, and I always followed their guidelines, they continually cut me more slack. By the time I was in High school, I could stay up as late as I wanted, go almost anywhere freely (As long as I told them where) and go about my life inside the house without being disturbed too often.

 

 

 

Trust is something you have to earn. Just be honest with your parents, do the right things, keep your temper down, and they'll gradually back off. It might take a while, since you've already made a mistake, but you'll definately start to see results if you keep at it.

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If you were older it would be worse. But since you're 14, i'm not very surprised. Although it does sound that they want to know a little too much about you.

 

I remember when i was 14, once i came home a 04.00 in the morning, and my mom was sitting on a chair in the kitchen waiting and then started asking all these questions.

 

But when i turned 15.. or 16.. I only said "i'm going to Patrik's house" and that was enough.

 

 

 

They've never gone through any of my stuff, well... Once when i was 14 or 15 my mom was taking my laundry and cleaning out my pockets and found cigs, which was less fun.

 

Ah and about.. "cigs.. drugs.. sex.." lol. I remember i was going to my then-current girlfriend when i was 15 or 16, in the evening, and when i had tied my shoes and was about to go out my mom asked me "do you need any condoms?".. I said something like "uhm.. erhm... I'm fine. Bye.". (going off-topic but.. ah..)

 

 

 

And what happens if you say "stop asking me!!!"?

J'adore aussi le sexe et les snuff movies

Je trouve que ce sont des purs moments de vie

Je ne me reconnais plus dans les gens

Je suis juste un cas désespérant

Et comme personne ne viendra me réclamer

Je terminerai comme un objet retrouvé

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I found the cure, make your room messy enough to be unsearchable by parents, yet clean enough for you to find everything and not have to clean your room, if you have a computer/laptop in your room make it passworded - can be easy, but unlikely guessable, a few words without a space are great eg fishcanswim (and if it's a laptop set it so it goes into sleep mode when you close it) all seem non-suspicious and are great ways to stop intrusions. Also having a section of a drawer you "never use" for stuff works well to (I keep a backup of my phone data on a flashdrive in a drawer next to my bed, because I never use the drawer otherwise)

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Nobody knows what's better for me than I myself. Not my parents, just me. You make it seem like I don't have a say in anything just because I'm not LEGALLY an adult. I'm not "a little kid". I'm a mature teenager. Seriously. Maybe you don't think so, but I do respect adults unless I disagree with them, and even most of the time I just keep my mouth shut. And there's no need to tell me what my parents think about me and how they trust me, when you have never met me or my folks at all before.

 

 

 

14 is still very young, and certainly not a mature age. And beyond that its not as if you proved yourself to be mature now, did you?

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