Reveal Confessions, Secrets & Regrets...

[Ginger_Warrior]

Whenever I meet someone new, I'm already 90% sure before I've even spoken a word that they don't like me / think I'm weird / would rather be somewhere else. It takes a lot of personal will power to put myself in situations where I don't know someone.

[Duff]

My friends are in this three-person band. I'm supportive of them. But they think they're God's gift to earth and that they sound "so rock" and "so pop punk." They listen to other bands and say, "Dude, these guys sound so much like us!" (notice how they don't say "we sound like them").

 

Honestly, I don't like their music at all, and it isn't good. I'm best friends with all of them, so I'm not going to say anything. But hell, they've convinced themselves that everyone is head over heels for their music, which is really annoying.

[Estonian dude]

On the eve of my birthday I wanted to jump off the balcony. 4th floor.

Decided I should sleep on it, and not do it while a bit drunk.

Decided not to do it the next morning.

 

Feel like I am no use to anybody. Worthless.

Could just end my existence so that someone better should get the resources used to keep me alive.

[Tim]

On the eve of my birthday I wanted to jump off the balcony. 4th floor.

Decided I should sleep on it, and not do it while a bit drunk.

Decided not to do it the next morning.

 

Feel like I am no use to anybody. Worthless.

Could just end my existence so that someone better should get the resources used to keep me alive.

 

Ladies and Gentlemen; my reincarnation.

[RpgGamer]

Muggiw had some wise words bout that

[muggiwhplar]

Muggiw had some wise words bout that

 

Lol I actually read the post Tim quoted and thought, "I'm sure somebody else will offer advice so I don't have to..." :P

 

I've had a lot of close friends become suicidal over the years. They are difficult to counsel because when you're that depressed, any actionable advice you offer is basically just going to bounce off them since they're so apathetic they're no longer willing to do anything to help themselves. It's hard enough getting a "normal" person to find a passion and reason to wake up in the morning, let alone a suicidal person.

 

I think the core of the issue is mostly a feeling of unworthiness and lack of love. So the best I could do was constantly remind my friends how important they were to me and to make sure they felt loved until their self-esteem would start to pick up again.

 

I did manage to talk one of my suicidal friends into taking his first cold shower once, though, and that was basically a temporary magic bullet. He was euphoric for the rest of the day and he started taking cold showers daily after that and said it helped a lot with his depression.

 

 

In a nutshell, though, if I were suicidal/depressed right now, here's a list of random things that I should do immediately (emphasis on "should," since there's no guarantees I'd actually be capable of doing it in that kind of state). Some are easier than others and some probably yield better results than others. You can combine many of them too. Anyways, in no particular order:

- spend at least 30 minutes in the sunshine

- go for a 30 minute walk

- sleep at least 8 hours/day at normal hours (the less light you perceive while you sleep, the better)

- take cold showers instead of warm/hot ones

- meditate for at least 20 minutes (just sit down, relax, and do my best not to think about anything)

- lift very heavy weights

- run till I feel like vomiting

- watch as much comedy as I can so I can get myself to laugh (ideally comedy that isn't sad or angry... no Louis C.K., Bill Burr, George Carlin, etc.)

- reread Maximum Achievement by Brian Tracy or at the very least, listen to the abridged audiobook version

- watch as much Brent Smith as possible

- repeatedly tell myself how much I like myself and how awesome I am, even if I didn't genuinely believe it

- minimize time spent with people who have a negative effect on my happiness (this would include a girl whom I have strong feelings for if that's what was causing or contributing to my unhappiness)

- spend more time with people whose presence makes me happy (this would not include a "special someone" unless I knew the feeling was mutual)

 

That's about all I can think of off the top of my head. Those are just things that I know make people feel better. Whether or not they'll actually have the willpower to do any of that depends on them. If you're smart, though, you'll consistently do these sorts of things even if you already feel fine/happy, so that way it's very unlikely you'll ever feel that unhappy in the first place.

[Tesset]

They are difficult to counsel because when you're that depressed, any actionable advice you offer is basically just going to bounce off them since they're so apathetic they're no longer willing to do anything to help themselves.

I think it's worth noting that, when someone is suicidal, it's not so much that they're not willing to help themselves, it's that everything they normally try to do to help doesn't work, and so it seems like there isn't a solution.

 

It'd be like if the one thing that normally makes you happy is gardening, and then suddenly gardening just makes you feel more depressed. No matter how much you go out and work on your garden, no matter whether you're growing flowers or vegetables or just making a rock garden, you're not getting any joy out of it. Suddenly, you don't have a source of happiness that you know about. Then someone else comes along and says "Rather than gardening, you should try running marathons!" but you've never been in shape your entire life and nothing appeals to you about running marathons because it's not something you've ever done and not something that's ever brought you joy.

 

Except replace gardening with everything Saq likes to do, and replace running marathons with school (because that's probably what he's hearing he should be doing). And you can replace marathons with pretty much anything, really.

 

But yeah, Saq, as someone who has been suicidal in the past, there's one thing I can figure out that helps. It's breaking the routine. Rather than doing what you always do for fun (Based on your posting, I'm going to assume parties/drinking/get togethers, but I don't know you well enough to know for sure), find something completely different. I mean, I switched from RS to competitive speech, and those are about as different as you can get for a high schooler. The important thing is that you try something different, even if it doesn't work out. It's better if whatever you're trying is easier to get into, as well. I've always thought that a martial art would be good, as long as you're going to a dojo/school which is fairly laid back, so if you're not sure what to look at, that might be a good start.

 

I think the core of the issue is mostly a feeling of unworthiness and lack of love. So the best I could do was constantly remind my friends how important they were to me and to make sure they felt loved until their self-esteem would start to pick up again.

And yeah. A lot of it's just surviving until something changes. If you go to a therapist/psychologist, and they diagnose you with depression, then it's waiting until the meds balance your endorphins/hormones out. If your future just looks bleak and impossible to manage, then its a matter of keeping going until classes are over and you've got a secure job, or until something smaller is less bleak. That's about the hardest thing to hear, but it's definitely true. You just have to survive until things are better.

[Estonian dude]

I love basketball.

But I can't really do any sports anymore cause I [bleep]ed up my knee. I can't run 10 yards without my knee starting to hurt.

[muggiwhplar]

Figure out how to play sports without using your knee, or get your knee fixed, or discover a new hobby

[RpgGamer]

Sorry to put the ball in your court like that Muggiw, I was about to fall asleep when I read it. Valid anti depression advice as always though :)

[Ginger_Warrior]

I love basketball.

But I can't really do any sports anymore cause I [bleep]ed up my knee. I can't run 10 yards without my knee starting to hurt.

Aren't you receiving some kind of physiotherapy for that knee? If it's that painful, aren't you under some kind of pain management from your family doctor?

 

On the suicidal tendencies: All of those things Muggi suggested are valid and you should definitely look into them. However, you also need professional support. Go to a healthcare professional or a doctor you can trust and tell them how you're feeling. If you find it intimidating to go on your own, ask a personal friend or someone else you trust to attend with you so that they can support you. It might feel like you're burdening them, but believe me, from personal experience, they won't feel like that and they'll want to be there for you. If you think it's going to take more than 10 minutes to explain how you're feeling, tell that to the receptionist when you make the appointment.

 

They should be able to help you manage it, or refer to services which would be most effective at helping you to manage it.

[Estonian dude]

I probably should be receiving physiotherapy for that knee, but only a few exercises to my thigh muscles. Which do not heal my knee from inside -_-

I ride my bicycle daily. My mileage is pretty high. And I was told to ride bicycle or swim, it was supposed to be the same or even better than any physiotherapy.

 

[bleep] the doctors.

 

I moved in September so I don't really have access to my family doctor. Otherwise I would have gone, even if just to get to a new orthopedist for a second opinion.

 

I don't feel suicidal right now. I have periods when I am feeling really down. So down that I think about hurting myself somehow. Around once a week, at least.

But I don't think I've ever had it so bad as when I was this last weekend.

[Low Levelled]

It's hard for me to comprehend how you feel, honestly. This sounds insensitive, but I've never gotten to the point where I wanted bad things to happen to myself. I've always had a life is beautiful (incredible movie) mentality, and I hope I'm able to maintain that.

[purpieman2]

I like the track "Let it go" from the movie Frozen. Quite a lot actually, and have been replaying it many, many times.

[Duff]

I have a roommate who loves that song. He loves that movie, actually.

 

I like to give him shit for it, but I really don't hold anything against him.

[Duff]

Regret: Choosing physics as my major instead of computer science.

 

Meh, I guess there's always graduate school for comp. sci. Maybe I'll survive that.

[Major Dash]

I don't know anybody that majored in straight up physics who didn't regret it. You aren't alone.

[RpgGamer]

There is a real strong chance I have herpes, but I don't have insurance to prove or denounce it. Thanks Obama.

[Major Dash]

There is a real strong chance I have herpes, but I don't have insurance to prove or denounce it. Thanks Obama.

 

You shouldn't have tapped that.

[muggiwhplar]

There is a real strong chance I have herpes, but I don't have insurance to prove or denounce it. Thanks Obama.

 

http://www.stdtestexpress.com/

[jasignhagj]

There is a real strong chance I have herpes, but I don't have insurance to prove or denounce it. Thanks Obama.

Aren't there any Planned Parenthood clinics in Jersey? Your University doesn't offer any sort of health clinic?

[The_Gabe]

There is a real strong chance I have herpes, but I don't have insurance to prove or denounce it. Thanks Obama.

:wall:

[RpgGamer]

 

 

There is a real strong chance I have herpes, but I don't have insurance to prove or denounce it. Thanks Obama.

http://www.stdtestexpress.com/

Still requires insurance, the med express by my place doesnt accept you if you dont have the right insurance, which I currently dont because I was on my dads plan until he got a new job last month. Which I only found out like yesterday -.-

But as soon as I get back on his plan I should be able to get checked so at least I can know one way or the other

[Estonian dude]

Silly stupid RPG, hate to say we told you so.

 

Moments like this make me really happy that I don't live in the States, least we have free STD checks for absolutely anyone. In fact, you actually get free condoms and stuff when you go check for that stuff.

[champion]

Yeah, but then you have to live in Estonia.