The Self-Development Thread

[Will H]

I have never flossed in my life and I don't intend to start any time soon.

 

I like how clean my mouth feels after flossing and brushing, you should try it

I don't quite like the taste of my own blood. :wink:

 

Ok. I've decided to help out TIF here. I do a lot of lurking and not enough posting (and when I post I don't contribute much...honestly I don't know how the hell I got so many total posts) so I'm gonna change that. I've been here since Christmas 2005, since middle school. Now I'm 20 year old college student/part time employee. You guys have been like my second group of friends, complete with the older, experience ones and the younger, friendlier ones. I don't know how you guys think of me, but I've always kinda assumed "That guy who posts occasionally but I don't know much of him".

 

So I'm gonna give more life to Off-topic than I currently do, because this is a community truly worth being a part of.,,,but one that I never fully expressed myself in.

Yay. :)

 

I need to post more often here as well. But I also need to stop procrastinating. What do.

[TTanT]

1. Go on Tip.it and post in any discussions you can add to.
   
2. Do things that need to be done.
   
3. Check Tip.it again.
   
4. Refresh page until it's time to sleep.
   
5. Sleep.
   
6. Repeat.
   

 

A healthy life, brought to you by Tip.it!

[RpgGamer]

Sounds like me on Facebook haha

[muggiwhplar]

Found this thread really interesting: http://www.pua-zone....-solve-problems

 

Also, has anyone ever seen Carl Sagan's Cosmos? I just finished watching the series last night. It's a bit dated but really fascinating. The final episode really makes you think/feel. The entire series is on Netflix and Youtube:

[Ginger_Warrior]

I found the second paragraph of the thread article quite strange in referencing health care workers (doctors) as problem-creators only interested in coating over symptoms. This is an age-old accusation about the medical profession, but there's never a shortage of dying patients, believe me; there's just no vested interest in telling a man with clear respiratory problems and cyanosed lips to take some cough medicine and get lots of rest. If he dies or gets discharged prematurely, I can almost guarantee the bed manager will phone within a few minutes to ask how quickly we can clear the bed for someone else. Same problems, same workload.

 

The article makes a good point, but as an aside, the vast majority of doctors I've worked with are genuinely passionate about making their patients better and preventing them from "bouncing back" into hospital again. If anything, we get sick of seeing the same patients coming back all the time.

 

Politicians (almost all the people cited in that final list, even Oprah, have political motivations to various extents), on the other hand, undoubtedly do have a vested interest in making problems to gain capital out of.

[muggiwhplar]

Yeah, I wouldn't necessarily accuse doctors of wanting to keep patients sick. I would, however, consider that perhaps the pharmaceutical companies, for example, have an interest in keeping people sick.

[Ginger_Warrior]

I have a friend who once worked in pharmaceuticals, genuinely driven and hoping to see the company develop something that might just help a patient heal a bit faster. She was left sorely disappointed, fed up and harboring a very deep resentment of the pharmaceutical industry. If I can recommend a great book: 'Bad Science' by Ben Goldacre. It tears homeopathy (speaking of industries which deliberately don't make problems go away) to pieces.

[PolarBearBlue]

My self confidence and my patience.

 

If I had more self confidence I'd probably have all the things I ever want to do/learn done by now. I'd be better at interviews, I'd be more physically fit, and I'd have a better social life. For a long time now I've been trying to lose weight now and live a more fit an active lifestyle but I don't find as easy as people say. I always felt that my effort was fruitless. I know it take a while before you really notice the change and get better; I was once an athlete, a bad one, but one nonetheless. But temptation is everywhere on a college campus and I get really discourage easy. I also don't make friends easy. I used to be very very shy. I've become a bit more outgoing, but not enough to shed my reserved, poker faced, guarded personality. I've been told I'm tuned to other peoples feelings, but unfortunate for me I tend to read things as always bad. I'm always trying to know what people think of me because I dislike conflict and I'm sensitive. And it makes me appear unfriendly when I'm not.

 

That's why I admire those outgoing people with a metric [cabbage] ton of confidence. They can do something I can't even when people talk bad about them to their face for being too honest.

 

As for patience, if I had a bit more of that, I'd know how to play the guitar and program by now. But the learning curves for both activities discourage me from wanting to do more. I know it's just me being lazy, so this is easier than change than other things.

[muggiwhplar]

Just gotta take baby steps. Confidence doesn't necessarily come from lots of experience and success... IMO it just comes from experience itself, regardless of whether or not those experiences are good, bad, successful, or failures.

 

Doing something you don't want to do or are afraid to do generally makes you feel happy when you're done doing it, whether you succeed or not. :thumbup:

 

Or at least that's how it is with me >_>

[Omar]

Full of swearwords and wisdom. Probably in equal parts.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcrhwatDkUM

[Ginger_Warrior]

I've become a bit more outgoing, but not enough to shed my reserved, poker faced, guarded personality. I've been told I'm tuned to other peoples feelings, but unfortunate for me I tend to read things as always bad. I'm always trying to know what people think of me because I dislike conflict and I'm sensitive. And it makes me appear unfriendly when I'm not.

I feel much the same about myself. My cultural interests aren't particularly outgoing; gaming, listening to music, watching sports. I'm easily at my happiest (ecstatic, almost) when I'm at music gigs, but my music interests aren't similar to any of my friends so I don't tend to go to them. I used to play sports as a kid, but being 5'0" makes it difficult to carry on ;) Personality-wise, I'm pretty reserved and very intuitive about other people, and I'm all too tempted to "clam up" when I'm around people I don't know.

 

When I was around 20 years old, I probably hit the lowest point in my life, mentally. I'd just left medical school and I had no work history, the recession had started. I had to go fortnightly to the Job Centre to pick up my dole money... it was humiliating. I was very confused about my future and very vulnerable, knowing I had to get a job and simply not having the faintest idea where to start finding one. I realised that the lack of experience was a massive turn-off to employers--I had no work skills, how could I be trusted to learn a new job and stick with it? So I started volunteering a lot. Like, any opportunity they had for me to volunteer and get out of the house for a few hours doing something practical and useful, I snatched it. My confidence improved massively, and I suddenly had something at my core that I'd invested in and wanted to see through and nourish. I think that's what they call "drive". That led to a job, which meant my work skills rapidly developed. Suddenly I had a belief that my work was making a practical difference, some kind of public benefit, and that actually I was quite good at it.

 

In the space of six months, I went from doing nothing and being nothing useful, to learning a trade and doing something that meant so much to me. It was crap pay and I was on casual hours, around 25 hours/wk, so no job security, but I didn't mind one bit. I loved it. From there I applied to university... I may still have a very naive and rosy impression of the career I've now chosen, but I honestly believe it's something that I'll continue to treasure and gain immense satisfaction from for, hopefully, a long time.

 

I think that's the secret. If I'd have bounced into a career I couldn't care less about... office work, for example, I'd have hated it because it would have meant nothing to me. Purposefully finding something I care deeply about and something I find challenging on a daily basis gives me a passion I can show to other people. It gives me a confidence to say in my head 'I don't really care what you think of me, unless it's something about the stuff I care deeply about, so like me or lump me'.

 

On a more practical note, I prefer talking to other people about their thoughts and feelings. I figured it's what comes more naturally to me; I'm not a "showy" person, I let my actions do the talking. It frustrates people sometimes because they expect you to contribute slightly to the conversation; I only tend to add anecdotes to conversations. But most people in the world, as I imagine most people here, are self-obsessed enough to be flattered that you want to talk about them so much.

[PolarBearBlue]

I've become a bit more outgoing, but not enough to shed my reserved, poker faced, guarded personality. I've been told I'm tuned to other peoples feelings, but unfortunate for me I tend to read things as always bad. I'm always trying to know what people think of me because I dislike conflict and I'm sensitive. And it makes me appear unfriendly when I'm not.

I feel much the same about myself. My cultural interests aren't particularly outgoing; gaming, listening to music, watching sports. I'm easily at my happiest (ecstatic, almost) when I'm at music gigs, but my music interests aren't similar to any of my friends so I don't tend to go to them. I used to play sports as a kid, but being 5'0" makes it difficult to carry on ;) Personality-wise, I'm pretty reserved and very intuitive about other people, and I'm all too tempted to "clam up" when I'm around people I don't know.

 

When I was around 20 years old, I probably hit the lowest point in my life, mentally. I'd just left medical school and I had no work history, the recession had started. I had to go fortnightly to the Job Centre to pick up my dole money... it was humiliating. I was very confused about my future and very vulnerable, knowing I had to get a job and simply not having the faintest idea where to start finding one. I realised that the lack of experience was a massive turn-off to employers--I had no work skills, how could I be trusted to learn a new job and stick with it? So I started volunteering a lot. Like, any opportunity they had for me to volunteer and get out of the house for a few hours doing something practical and useful, I snatched it. My confidence improved massively, and I suddenly had something at my core that I'd invested in and wanted to see through and nourish. I think that's what they call "drive". That led to a job, which meant my work skills rapidly developed. Suddenly I had a belief that my work was making a practical difference, some kind of public benefit, and that actually I was quite good at it.

 

In the space of six months, I went from doing nothing and being nothing useful, to learning a trade and doing something that meant so much to me. It was crap pay and I was on casual hours, around 25 hours/wk, so no job security, but I didn't mind one bit. I loved it. From there I applied to university... I may still have a very naive and rosy impression of the career I've now chosen, but I honestly believe it's something that I'll continue to treasure and gain immense satisfaction from for, hopefully, a long time.

 

I think that's the secret. If I'd have bounced into a career I couldn't care less about... office work, for example, I'd have hated it because it would have meant nothing to me. Purposefully finding something I care deeply about and something I find challenging on a daily basis gives me a passion I can show to other people. It gives me a confidence to say in my head 'I don't really care what you think of me, unless it's something about the stuff I care deeply about, so like me or lump me'.

 

On a more practical note, I prefer talking to other people about their thoughts and feelings. I figured it's what comes more naturally to me; I'm not a "showy" person, I let my actions do the talking. It frustrates people sometimes because they expect you to contribute slightly to the conversation; I only tend to add anecdotes to conversations. But most people in the world, as I imagine most people here, are self-obsessed enough to be flattered that you want to talk about them so much.

 

Sometimes people ask me "Hey, wanna join us." In my head, I go "YES YES YES!" But the words that come out of my mouth are "Naw, I'm good." Then I go back wondering, "What's wrong with me."

 

I do enjoy my own company a lot but I don't wanna be alone all the time. Also, I don't wanna go through what you did Gingy. All this school and no work. I really [cabbage]ed in college when I did bad at my first 2 years as an engineering student. I'm doing much better in Economist but looking at the job market, I shot myself in the foot.

 

Gingy I feel a lot like you. Not as smart but still. I like talking about others thoughts a feelings too. I always assumed I was odd sense I dislike conflict and would enjoy just not knowing somethings I learn. But that's where I'm most comfortable I suppose. I like knowing where I stand all the time.

[Ginger_Warrior]

I'm not smart. :P I think I'm more meticulous/perfectionist than anything...

 

How critical have you been of that statement "what's wrong with me?". Why didn't you join them? Think hard about it, there might be legitimate reasons. If there aren't legitimate reasons, promise yourself to say 'yes' next time, even if it makes you feel uncomfortable.

 

I think it was Mel (Goddess) who once said "Speak up, even if your voice trembles"... it's honestly one of the best bits of advice I've ever seen.

[Estonian dude]

My main problem has been speaking too much. When in school at least.

[muggiwhplar]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuJ4hbkLiY0

 

Usually not a fan of vids like that but he hit the nail on the head :thumbsup:

[baileydafrog]

despite the mockery he may get, he's an absolute hero and should be an inspiration to most, not because of his size or his career, but he's gone through 3 different public careers, aced the first 2, the final one is debatable, but he's still popular and well loved after it, thrown himself in the deep end to challenge himself and come out on top and still seems a genuinely nice guy, props to the man

[muggiwhplar]

Exactly

[AirFramer]

I really like this thread! If there is one thing in my experiences in life that I have learned is that you should always seek to better yourself and the people around you. There are a couple of things that I wish to accomplish and better myself in. One of the things I am looking into right now is trying to get my private license to fly fixed-winged aircraft and then hopefully helicopters. Another one of my goals is to take FULL advantage of my Tuition Assistance that is (unless its been taken away) offered to me by the military and finish getting my associates and then bachelors after that. I want to get my AMP license (Power Plants on Aircraft) and as many qualifications that are offered to me in my MOS. Another one of my goals is to be accepted into the Journeyman's program which allows me to record the hours I spend at work, to be used as like an apprenticeship for a major Aviation company such as Boeing or etc. The last 2 goals that I will mention on here is to be more financially responsible and to be more engaged with God and living like Jesus did 8-)

[Omar]

Summer is right around the corner, does anyone have goals they want to achieve? I'm doing Starting Strength as soon as I figure out the logistics. I'm compiling a list of books I want to have read by the end of the summer, if I can get my hands on them that is. So far, I have:

 

Future Babble by Dan Gardner

Freakonomics by Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner

Human Action by Ludwig von Mises

The Ethics of Liberty by Murray Rothbard

[Low Levelled]

My summer goals are to FBGM.

 

 

 

 

No rlly.

[Omar]

How many and how much though?

[constrictor]

Also, Omar, Freakonomics is super interesting.

 

[Tim]

Winter is coming.

 

and on that note, I've been watching what I eat and do lately. I think I've dropped 5 kgs in the past month, which isnt much, but that'd put me @ 80kg, and im hoping to hit back down to 60 before Summer (Nov)

[PolarBearBlue]

Well hopefully my summer plans include working. A company in Chicago emailed me saying they got my application, and will be making interview calls around May 15th. I also had an interview for a company in Columbus. They had about 30 applications and interviewed 8 people for 3 positions. So even if they don't accept me, the fact that I was 1 out of 8 out of 30 means I'm doing better already.

 

Otherwise, I hope to finally get the lead out and practice guitar. I also plan to workout this summer. I bought the Insanity workout basic...whatever. But on further reflection I realize I'm far to fat to try it. :P

[muggiwhplar]

Tom Campbell on fear (the vid should start at 1:21:30; if not, skip there unless you want to watch the whole thing, which is great btw)

 

 

Love this guy.

's good too.