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are people becoming pickier about Facebook "friends"?


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Back when Facebook was new, people seemed eager to connect with each other. I added many of my old classmates, as well as received a bunch of friend requests from them. I accepted all of the them because I'm pretty open, and most other people also accepted mine.

 

However, things seem to have changed now. Case in point, a considerable amount of friend requests I've recently sent to people I know are still pending. They seem to be active on Facebook, which suggests they aren't interested in accepting my friend requests. Even two of my childhood friends waited several months before accepting them. I'm also getting unfriended by real-life acquaintances more often now.

 

I know Facebook "friendships" are no big deal, but it seems people are becoming pickier about who they want to connect with. One reason I could think of is that the novelty of social networking is long gone. I guess privacy is also an issue as people seem to think that becoming "friends" with someone on Facebook gives them access to their personal information - even though it's not who you become "friends" with, but what kind of information you share online. I'm sure there are other reasons as well.

 

For those of you Tip.It'ers that use Facebook, I have a few questions:

 

1. Are your friend requests getting rejected more or less often, or is there no change?

2. Are you getting unfriended more or less often?

3. Have you become pickier about Facebook "friends" yourself?

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To answer your questions:

1- No noticeable change

2- Maybe a little more often, but not much

3- I always have been picky. I've only once been above 150 and that is only because I have a large family group (mother has 9 siblings, all but one of whom have kids)

 

And to add:

 

I have a few friend requests (that I sent, 2 more that people sent me) that are still pending after over a year, one even longer. I also personally caused a few of my "unfriendings". I think I'm sitting at 143 now, but I have a feeling that number will soon shrink even more.

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I noticed a lot of changes, people don't seem to be accepting my requests as they used to, and not as many people are friend requesting me. I'm not getting unfriended though. I'm still pretty open and accept all the friend requests that don't look like scams.

 

I have been experiencing the same thing as you. Even when adding old classmates, one of them asked me who I was before adding me. Seems like she didn't remember me being her classmate.. Oh well lol.

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I don't send out requests to just anyone anymore so there hasn't been much change in my rejection rate butnive been deleted more frequently in the past 2-3 years. I took it offensively at first but I've come to terms with the fact that not everyone likes seeing drunk pictures of me on their facebook newsfeed all the time. I think its both the evolution of social media and just a part of growing up that has lead to this "trend" of pickier facebook friending

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I think I have 611 facebook friends. I don't know of anyone unfriending me because of something I did but there have been a couple of times that I have unfriended people because 1) they were far too concerned about what I was posting when really it's the internet, I'm a teenager, let me complain and/or 2) stupid status updates using language that I don't really want on my newsfeed and doing this all the time.

 

I have always been picky about who I friend, I need to have met them at least once and usually when I send a request it's accepted pretty quickly. I do have one I was sent that's pending because she was a camper at the camp I was a counselor at over the summer but I think I can friend her now.

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If I know the person I'm usually quite happy to add them, there are very few people who I dislike strongly.

 

I've reduced the number of people I've added, mostly because I'd talk with someone at a party or two and now I have a bunch of friends I don't really know/will likely never see again.

 

I tend not to unfriend though, usually I'll just hide posts from those I'm not interested in. I've noticed being unfriended a couple of times but they've all been people I haven't seen for a while and I look at their profiles/whatever so infrequently I don't actually know when they did it.

 

Can someone explain why they keep their friends within a set number? That seems like a strange practice to me, the amount if people you want to interact with will vary over time.

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If I know the person I'm usually quite happy to add them, there are very few people who I dislike strongly.

 

I've reduced the number of people I've added, mostly because I'd talk with someone at a party or two and now I have a bunch of friends I don't really know/will likely never see again.

 

I tend not to unfriend though, usually I'll just hide posts from those I'm not interested in. I've noticed being unfriended a couple of times but they've all been people I haven't seen for a while and I look at their profiles/whatever so infrequently I don't actually know when they did it.

 

Can someone explain why they keep their friends within a set number? That seems like a strange practice to me, the amount if people you want to interact with will vary over time.

It means that, when you add people you want, you have to remove people you don't want/care about. It forces you to prune the list. You just set the number to be higher than the number of people you'll want on your facebook feed at any given time.

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I rarely go on facebook but when i do i usually only accept people who i know in some way.

At first i only accepted irl friends but now il accept internet friends too.

So if anything i've gotten less pickier.

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If I know the person I'm usually quite happy to add them, there are very few people who I dislike strongly.

 

I've reduced the number of people I've added, mostly because I'd talk with someone at a party or two and now I have a bunch of friends I don't really know/will likely never see again.

 

I tend not to unfriend though, usually I'll just hide posts from those I'm not interested in. I've noticed being unfriended a couple of times but they've all been people I haven't seen for a while and I look at their profiles/whatever so infrequently I don't actually know when they did it.

 

Can someone explain why they keep their friends within a set number? That seems like a strange practice to me, the amount if people you want to interact with will vary over time.

It means that, when you add people you want, you have to remove people you don't want/care about. It forces you to prune the list. You just set the number to be higher than the number of people you'll want on your facebook feed at any given time.

 

Yeah I get the pruning numbers part. I'm more curious as to the how/why you determine the bolded part.

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Well, I did by getting 50 friends and some change, getting annoyed at the random stuff I was seeing, and deciding to keep it below 50 because that was the nearest round number.

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  • 2 weeks later...
1. Are your friend requests getting rejected more or less often, or is there no change? I don't notice this, I'm adding less people

2. Are you getting unfriended more or less often? Not personally, but I know people who are

3. Have you become pickier about Facebook "friends" yourself? YES. Since I left uni, I made a new Facebook. Trimmed it down from ~1100 friends down to ~170. Since I also moved half way across the country for work, and don't plan on ever moving back "home", I'm not befriending people from my home town and have deleted all friends from school/college.

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  • 2 weeks later...

1. I rarely send out requests; if I do, they are for people I already know well, and so they all get accepted.

2. Difficult to say as I don't check it very often..and even if I do, I spend very little time actually 'online'.

3. It depends on how much you share your 'private information' with your so-called 'friends' on Facebook. For example, everyone knows my birthday, so it's no secret. But only my real 'friends' know I'm in a relationship for example, and that's not everyone on it. And it is done so that people cannot tell based on conversations/photos etc. So depending on how much of different aspects of your personal life you share with your Facebook 'friends', being pickier is just another 'security measure'. That being said, I am still very picky from the beginning, but that's just me.

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  • 1 month later...

It depends where you are from... here in Switzerland ppl are REALLY picky... in the US I made the experience that ppl will just add anyone.. and in most southern countries too.

 

Also depends on the age of a person.

 

Also depends if you are "cool" for having many FBFs^^

 

 

 

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  • 2 years later...

Oh Hai Goon. I almost didn't recognize this thread. I'm absolutely pickier with my Facebook connections now that I'm older and don't want the generic spam of your average adolescent doofus what with all the vines and buzzfeed links

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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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1. Are your friend requests getting rejected more or less often, or is there no change?


 


I think there's been a few pending ones that just chill before being ignored for eternity or eventually accepted.


 


2. Are you getting unfriended more or less often?


 


I think from time to time someone deletes me but it's likely someone I never really spoke to, and even if it was someone I did speak to, I'm not bothered about it.


 


 


3. Have you become pickier about Facebook "friends" yourself?


 

Definitely, I have ignored a fair few friend requests and when I'm drunk I can delete up to 50 people at once.

It always makes me freak out a little when I hit a 'milestone' like 500 or 600 'friends' because I know I don't have 600 ish friends so I get sketched out and get rid of a few of the stragglers. Having said that, I'm growing up and I've had a wealth of experiences which means I've met a large number of people from different parts of my life so it's no surprise that I've probably acquired around 100 ish friends from my year abroad, from my jobs over the years, from holidays, bits and pieces adds up to the 616 I have now.

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