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Noobs say the funniest things!


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5766 replies to this topic

#21
Ralvn
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Ralvn

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i remember one, but this isnt mine so i cannot take credit. (ill use 'me' to mean the person who said this)



it went something like"



Noob: ill buy those bunny ears.

Me: theyre nontradable

Noob: how much?

Me: you cant trade them

Noob: then how can i get them

Me: you would have ot build a time machine, go back to last easter, and get them

Noob: oh, ok...

Noob: how can i go about building this time machine.



:lol: that one had me in stitches!




lol i think that one is quite funny too :lol:

#22
Darkluniux
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Darkluniux

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i was wanderer in varrock with my zammy full, then a noob came and i morph in the most sacred form of all: "the easter egg"



noob:w00t, how do you do that?

me:what?

noob:THAT!

me:ah, this is an egg duhh!!!

noob:an egg?

me:yeah! in soviet russia, egg eats you!!!

noob:w00T!

me:lol

(so i do the egg run to make the noob more impressed)

noob:woah! how do you do that?

me:...

me:...

noob: cmon say it!

me:...

noob:plz!!!!

me:ok! listen carefully:

noob:ok11111

me:to get this all sacred form you need to have lvl 95 mage, this form add you a bonus on def.

noob:really?

me:lol

noob:c'mon

me:wanna see a stuff a lot impressive?

noob:umm, ok!

(i display and talk at the zombie head form hallowen event)

noob:wow!

noob:what is that?

me:a monk's head

noob:wtf?

me:yeah a monk head, to get it you need 85 prayer

noob:woot, how i get it?

me: it is the St Jonh's head.

noob:really?

me:yes to get it you must go to a templar temple and pay 5m to a knight templar.

noob:where are the templars?

me:they are in france, but you must go quick before philip IV execut them.

noob:OH

(time later after many jokes with a friend)

noob:heym that is not tru, the egg is an easter ring!

me:ok...

noob:how you get it?!?!?

me:you're a noob

noob:i'm not! i got a lvl 85 account!

me:really?

noob:yes

me:how a lvl 85 dont know about a easter ring?

noob:errr...welll...

me:noob!
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Behold my blog! Thou shalt visit it and rejoice!

#23
Ralvn
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Ralvn

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my favorite one from the past



Noob(lvl61): hello

Me(lvl49 at the time): yea?

Noob: can i have your armor plz? (full black Mystic)

Me: uh....no.

Noob: give it to me noob! u dont deserve it! i'll kill u in wildy!

Me: first off its members armor and it costs 600k

Noob: liar. reported for item scamming!

Me: tell them i said hi idiot



thats how it went. or something like that :roll:
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#24
kuud
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kuud

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this noob pm's me- note i do not have a blue party hat.



noob- can i have your blue party hat

me-don't have one

noob- yes u do noob i saw u wearing one, give it to me

me-lol don't have one noob, go beg some 1 else that actually has 1

noob-u noob im reporting u for being a noob!!!

me-i wish we could....
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#25
eddie_682
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eddie_682

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oooh i got lots of this, but all heard from freinds :D



player: Poisoning daggers for free!

me: er, so I give you a dagger, you poison it, and you hand it back right?

(quick check, nope, he's not in highscores for herby)

player: yes that's right, can I have your dagger please.

me: why not just hand out free weapon poison?

player: I want xp from poisoning them

me: that sounds suspiciously like item scamming to me

player: it is.



You can guess what happened next



and this is is funny too:



Noob1: OMG!!! My brother is going to be so happy for me!

Noob2: Why?

Noob1: Because, I just got on his account and made him some profit!!!

Noob2: How did you do that?!?

Noob1: I checked the prices on his crown he was wearing with the general store and it was only 2 gp!

Noob1: I sold it to another player for 100K!!!!

Noob2: OMG! Your so lucky! I wish I had 100K!

Noob1: I know, he's going to be so happy with me and he'll probably give me 50K!

Me: LMAO!!!!!!!!!

^this one made me laugh alot



and i got this one too



Noob:Can I have some sausages?

Guy(weilding abby whip):huh?

Noob:Can i have some sausages

Guy:What sausages?

Noob:The ones you're holding

Guy:these aren't sausage links(attacks guard to prove it)

Noob:wow, you killed something with sausages!plz plz can i have some

Guy:it's an abyssal whip

Noob:they're sausages

Guy:they're not sausages!!

Noob:noob im reporting you

Guy:for what?

Noob: for not sharing food

Guy:THEY'RE NOT FREAKING SAUSAGES!!!

Noob:omg why didn't you say so ffs noob

^lol i always tought whips look weird



thats all i have for now :lol:
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#26
Icingdeath
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Icingdeath

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Alright, so I'm fishing on my level 25 PKer in Barbarian Village, and a level 70 comes up...yeah.



Him: Stupid mage noob.

Me: ...

Him: Yeah, you. Stupid noob.

Me: ...

Him: You stupid noob, my magic is prolly higher than yours.

Me: I'm sure it is.

Him: That's right, noob. Want to fight? I could kill you.

Me: I'm sure you could, seeing as you are nearly three times my level.

Him: I could you stupid noob, kill you with my 2h.





It's really not that funny, just thought of how stupid this guy was. I did nothing to provoke him, yet he begins to insult me. I've lost all hope in humanity.

I really wouldn't call it an era. It was more of a definitive time period during which dinstinctive characteristics were expressed in similar ways.


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#27
ironori
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ironori

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These people are funny!

#28
Viv
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Viv

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level13:where did you get that rmer

it was trimmed addy

level51:i trimmed it myself

level51:I CAN TRIM YOURS TOO it is on the crafting skill

level51:you have to have level 999 crafting to do it

level51: just give me yours i can trim it

level13:ok ok i have full steel

level51:that would be perfect hand over

me:scammer scammer scammer

level51:shut the [bleep] up n00b

level51:scamming is my perfesion

me:lmao a confession

me:reported

level13:hear is the ermor

level51:teleports

level13:0mg 0mg need aermer1111

#29
Potatosniped
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Potatosniped

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Some newbie was standing at the falador furnace and was saying "Buying 4 iron bars" for 30 minutes or something. Then someone finnaly was kind enough to give them to him to shut him up
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Powermining to Victory! (80/85)

#30
Shadow93
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Shadow93

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Noob: Hi where you get those imp masks?

Me: It's a red halloween mask

Noob: No it's not it looks like a imp head

Me: Well it sorta is a dragon head..

Noob: Noob, fake dmed!!

Me: Lol
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#31
xXAbyssalXx
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xXAbyssalXx

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oooh i got lots of this, but all heard from freinds :D

Noob1: OMG!!! My brother is going to be so happy for me!

Noob2: Why?

Noob1: Because, I just got on his account and made him some profit!!!

Noob2: How did you do that?!?

Noob1: I checked the prices on his crown he was wearing with the general store and it was only 2 gp!

Noob1: I sold it to another player for 100K!!!!

Noob2: OMG! Your so lucky! I wish I had 100K!

Noob1: I know, he's going to be so happy with me and he'll probably give me 50K!

Me: LMAO!!!!!!!!!

^this one made me laugh alot




LOL! I bet his brother either killed him or killed himself :lol:



[TEST]

Ever had a noob say something stupid to you? Well post it here!

#32
dread_rasta
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dread_rasta

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i remember one, but this isnt mine so i cannot take credit. (ill use 'me' to mean the person who said this)



it went something like"



Noob: ill buy those bunny ears.

Me: theyre nontradable

Noob: how much?

Me: you cant trade them

Noob: then how can i get them

Me: you would have ot build a time machine, go back to last easter, and get them

Noob: oh, ok...

Noob: how can i go about building this time machine.



:lol: that one had me in stitches!




that's hularious.. :lol:

#33
teh_soldier
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teh_soldier

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him: bi u legzz!1!!

him: bi u legzz!!1!

him: ffs *expletive* bi u *expetive* legs u *expletive* noob irl!!1!1

me: im sory, im using them, maybe you would like to purchase a pancreus instead

him: giv me panacur fre plz noob

:-s
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#34
xXAbyssalXx
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xXAbyssalXx

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him: bi u legzz!1!!

him: bi u legzz!!1!

him: * *expletive* bi u *expetive* legs u *expletive* noob irl!!1!1

me: im sory, im using them, maybe you would like to purchase a pancreus instead

him: giv me panacur fre plz noob

:-s




I'm guessing that guys about 10 or 9 years old :|

#35
Black_Tiger
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Black_Tiger

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This happened a while ago.



( I was wearing my warrior outfit, with Obby shield)

A lvl 27 guy comes up to me:



Noob:Hi

Me:Hello.

Noob:Omg!!1!!

Me:What?

Noob:Whats dat shield?

Me:Obby shield.

Noob:What kinda name is obby?

Me:It's an obsidian shield.

Noob:You said it wus obby. Reported for item scamminng.

Me:Obby = short for obsidian.

Noob:So your shield is a short version of an obsidian one?

Me:No...My shield is obsidian. Obby is obsidian, just shorter name.

Noob:I see..What def lvl is needed?

Me:60

Noob:I got that! Gimme your shield noob!!

Me:How about no?

Noob:I wil kill you! I can attack outta the wildy!

Me:Fascinating.

Noob:Yeah! Gimme your shield!

Me:No.

Noob:Lemme go get my attacking outta wildy staff. Brb!



He never came back :?
91 Combat
80 Cooking

Yeah.

#36
moneyman5
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moneyman5

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yeah i remember one time..i was cookin on a range in little house in varrock..i burnt some food. and a noob said take your trash outside.. lol

#37
bravenob
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bravenob

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last week i was in castle wars and a lvl 3 asked me if i was a member lol

#38
xXAbyssalXx
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xXAbyssalXx

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This happened a while ago.



( I was wearing my warrior outfit, with Obby shield)

A lvl 27 guy comes up to me:



Noob:Hi

Me:Hello.

Noob:Omg!!1!!

Me:What?

Noob:Whats dat shield?

Me:Obby shield.

Noob:What kinda name is obby?

Me:It's an obsidian shield.

Noob:You said it wus obby. Reported for item scamminng.

Me:Obby = short for obsidian.

Noob:So your shield is a short version of an obsidian one?

Me:No...My shield is obsidian. Obby is obsidian, just shorter name.

Noob:I see..What def lvl is needed?

Me:60

Noob:I got that! Gimme your shield noob!!

Me:How about no?

Noob:I wil kill you! I can attack outta the wildy!

Me:Fascinating.

Noob:Yeah! Gimme your shield!

Me:No.

Noob:Lemme go get my attacking outta wildy staff. Brb!



He never came back :?




It's scary seeing how stupid some people are :lol:

#39
nightshade53
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nightshade53

    Hobgoblin Killer

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This poor person thought that you got mime gear by buring bones..



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They proceded to run around madly gathering bones in the chicken farm..

#40
ApplePieMan
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ApplePieMan

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I liked this one. People were selling laws for 400 each in World 1.



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:wall:
~~ApplePieMan
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