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Member Since 19 Jun 2004
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The Test of Friendship Thread

22 October 2007 - 06:55 PM

Well, it's been a while since we had a happy, get all of the community involved type thread, so here goes.

To escape the mundaneness of life, me and my friends like to put each other through a series of tasks, called "Tests of Friendship". Now, I doubt this concept is original, but it's damn good fun. Basically, if they're your 'true' friend, than they would perform this inhumane/graphic/groteesque/disgusting task, to prove they would do anything for you. All very lovely isn't it?

Well, lately, I've been running out of tests and I thought I'd get a discussion going about what other tests could be done.

Now, with everything, there are some rules to what constitutes an appropiate test. What rhymes with rule? Cool. Anyway, here they are:

No sexual acts. They tend to ruin, not galvanise, friendship

Nothing that will cause significant mental harm. Physical? Well, that's fine. What counts as 'significant', you're call :P

Causing direct harm to someone to prove your friendship to someone else. That's not a test, that's cruel. Harming yourself is fine and, generally, that's what most rules are about.

No cheating.

No quitting. Only quitters quit, and Triple T, is a hitter.

And that's about it really. Here's a few existing Tests of Friendship:

If you're really my friend, you'll pick my ear wax and eat it.

If you're really my friend, you'll suck my big toe.

If you're really my friend, you'll get naked.

If you're really my friend, you'll get me a drink.

If you're really my friend, you'll let me put make up on you. (Hate this one)

If you're really my friend, you'll eat that yellow bit of snow.

If you're really my friend, you'll let me towel snap you.

If you're really my friend, you'll eat the pizza that's been there for 3 days.

If you're really my friend, you will let me make your next haircut. -Abelmisi

If you're really my friend, you will let me put a towel around your eyes and guide you around. -Abelmisi

If you're really my friend, you will share me your embarassing stories.-Abelmisi

If you're really my friend you will let me make you a coctail without seeing what I put in it. - Abelmisi

If you're really my friend you'll shoot yourself in the foot with a BB gun -darkmage

If you're really my friend, you'll tell that shady looking Italian type that I can't make this week's payment for me - Necro

If you're really my friend you'll retrieve this bag of jelly babies from the river. - Ragen

If you're really my friend, you will... Eat my toenail - Matt

If you're really my friend you will drive through the city, windows down, sub woofer cranking with the spice girls playing. Then, driving up to a female driver singing "tell me what you want, what you really, really want". - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you'll sing your job interview.- IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you will scratch a scratchie ticket in the middle of the mall then yell "OH MY *beep* GOD!" while thrusting the ticket up in the air.- IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you will slap some random on the arse and say "sorry I thought you were someone else". - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you will scream "TOUCHHHHHHHH DOWNN!!" in the middle of the public library. - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you will approach a stranger wearing your boxers on your head, introducing yourself as "pantsman 2000". - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you will walk your dog around the neighbourhood wearing matching outfits. - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you will enter star bucks (or any other cafe) and yell "we can't stop here, this is bat country" while running straight back out. - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you will lick the recently used fly swatter. - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you'll attempt to skate on the treadmill. - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you'll drink my mystery milkshake. - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you'll do the chicken dance in the middle of a busy beach in your speedos. - IGoddessI

If you're really my friend you'll tackle that big hairy looking second row for me. - assassin

If you're really my friend you'll test whether or not that yoghurt is really past it's use by date or not. - assassin

If you're really my friend you'll pop one of my zits. - Powman3

If you're really my friend, you will taste the thing on the ground to make sure that it's chocolate. - Killerred05

If you were really my friend you would place the biggest, salt and vinegar chip on your tongue - IGoddessI

If you were really my friend, you'd spend 5 minutes in a revolving door, going around and around and around.... - VurtualRuler98

And so on. Get thinking people!

Man comes fifth in local hedge trimming contest.

19 September 2007 - 11:53 PM

A man, aged 43 from Basingstoke, came fifth in his local hedge trimming contest, it emerged yesterday.

The competition, which has run annually for seven years, attracts crowds of around 140 people each year, prompting a wave of public interest across the globe.

Derek Smith, the man who came fifth, can't understand why Basingstoke is thrust into the limelight during the early weeks of September.

"I thought my hedge was good, but not great. I think the best shears won." He continued: "But this whole pullava with the media and me talking to you seems a bit odd. I mean, it's only Basingstoke"

Jacob Bridges of the World Telecommunication Federation puts the increase in coverage down to the rise of the internet. He commented: "With Google Earth and up to date RSS feeds, literally every corner of the world is covered. Well, it would if it was flat."

Samantha Ball, founder of the 1999 organisation Sanity Please Against Media, added: "I think this increase can be very detrimental to communities. People are constantly bombarded with information that's trivial to them." She went on to explain how this information leaves no room for discussion and even lacks humour. "I just don't know what to tell my kids when they come out with these stories" she complained.

Derek Smith is currently enjoying his red and white rosette, with a hint of green, in his back garden. He has yet to announce if he'll be entering the contest this year.

What do you guys think of this? I think there are some things in it that could mean stuff. But then again, it might not mean that at all, but something else. I don't know.

I was so tempted to Bel-Air this. Hope some of you enjoy the hidden semantics.

RetroFest baby! Love for the 80s

29 August 2007 - 06:27 PM

Long shot, but anyone else, besides me, going to the RetroFest this weekend? :P

Basically, it's a festival celebrating the decade of horrendous fashion, sciintillating synthisers and all round mega music! There's also a circus to learn tricks, a reflex 80s dance tent, and a place to deposit your clothes for some 80s pop star get up! Woop!

Headlining this year are Human League, Bananarama, ABC, Tony Hadley, Kim Wilde, Belinda Carlisle, The Blockheads and many many more!

It's gonna be an all out cheese fest, and if I don't come back, avenge my death!

Man banned from talking to women

02 August 2007 - 08:18 PM

BBC Source

A man has been banned from talking to women for five years after committing a number of indecent assaults.

Paul Jennings, 23, pedalled up behind and grabbed the bottoms of five women jogging, cycling or walking in a park.

He would brake when confronted by an angry victim, hurl verbal abuse, blow them a kiss and pedal off.

The father-of-two from Swindon is forbidden from approaching any woman he does not know in the open air, unless for legitimate reasons.

Karate chop

At Swindon Crown Court, Judge Douglas Field handed Jennings the five-year order, a three-year community order and told him to attend a sex offenders programme.

The court heard Jennings cycled to Coate Water Country Park on the evening of 17 April.

Claire Marlow, prosecuting, said his first victim was out jogging when Jennings cycled up and grabbed her from behind.

Minutes later a 28-year-old jogging with a friend was grabbed between the legs. Jennings again stopped in front of her and winked before riding off.

A 36-year-old pushing her bike up a hill was grabbed in a similar way, and Jennings shouted, before grabbing a 40-year-old jogger's bottom.

His final victim, a 44-year-old woman was standing by the park entrance when he grabbed her between the legs.

He then let go when she karate chopped him on the arm. When arrested Jennings told police he had made a mess of his life.

Now, it's right he was punished for what he did, it was totally unacceptable. But does anyone else see the punishment as impractical, archaic and, in all honesty, very, very funny?

TEFL teaching rocks!

30 July 2007 - 10:33 AM

I think I found my calling in life :<img src=:' />

The last 3 weeks, I was in a part of the world called Cranbrook, with 42 foreign 8-12 year old students teaching English. The whole thing was surreal, as I was a last minute replacement - but it was one of the most rewarding things I've ever done.

Waking up at 7am with the kids in a lodge, getting them to breakfast at 8, lessons from 9.30-12.30, afternoon activities from 1.30 till 5.30, a big massive activity of capture the flag, challenges involving pies, bananas and mustard or something else in the evening, putting them to bed at 9.30 and cramming in planning until midnight. Then we do it all again!

It was so much fun and it really was an eye opener. The one thing these very intelligent kids had in common was English - Taiwanese, Brazilians, Portugese, Germans, Russians, Kuwaitis, Indonesians, Italians - all communicated in this one language. It made me really think how global everything is and how lucky I was to be in the situation to teach the language I hitherto took for granted.

Learning the different cultures first hand (being called Teacher Tom was infectious) really shattered a lot of my naivety. Kids from different countries are just kids like anywhere else - wanting to mess around, play games and have a good time. In that sense, I'd say I'm still a kid.

So yeah, basically, if you were wondering if I'd fallen down a well, I hadn't, I was doing this. And, if you wonder what you could do in the summer or possibly as a career, give this a go. It's smegging brilliant! :D