Short story written in about 10 minutes

[kaosmerchant]

Here's a quick paper that I wrote in response to the prompt "What do you believe in?" Still rough draft format, advice welcomed. I'm 13 years old, in 8th grade. I think it automatically took way the indents; they're there, believe me!

 

 

 

I Believe

 

 

 

I can hear the crowd's roar, surrounding me. Behind me, my teammates cheer me on, giving encouragement, positive thoughts, and yelling my name. The other team, in the field, at their positions. Some look at me briefly, others don't. I look up. I see the pitcher glancing at me, assessing his new target. I know that now is my time to shine, and that if there was ever a time to succeed, it's now.

 

I think of who I'm representing. It's not only myself that I'm holding up or letting down here; it's so much more than that. I represent my team, my town, my school, myself, my coaches, and most of all, my teammates. My success here can change the outcome of the game; I'm here to succeed. I believe in the power of positive thinking, of a can-do attitude, and a belief in myself. I want nothing besides my one goal; a base hit.

 

I step up to the plate, and look at the pitcher. A moderate-sized kid, with wide shoulders and some obvious inner strength to him. I tell myself 'great; the harder he throws it, the harder I hit it'. The pitcher glances around at the now full bases; I can tell he's nervous, but won't let it get the best of him. Another quick check at third base, and he's ready to throw. The pitch comes in; not too hard, definitely time to get around. Still, not where I like it.

 

ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¦Ã¢â¬ÅStrike!ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâÃ

[Xewleer]

Hmmm... You are successful because of your optimistic view on life...

 

 

 

Yet my pessimistic and dark view of the world-system grants me success...

 

 

 

fascinating...

 

 

 

Not bad, but it would help if you separate the paragraphs with an enter-strike.