Affably evil

[Xewleer]

This is a story I've named Affably evil. The plot will be made up as I go along and it might not make sense.

 

 

 

Johnston sat in his chair and talked, via a web communication service named Ventrilo, to his friends.

 

 

 

"I tell you I would make an awesome villain. Think about it? I lead Jonston intl. An up and coming industrial company that makes anything! I could make guns for rebel armies and all kinds of things like that!"

 

 

 

"Johnston, that's not really evil so much as a corrupt corporate executive." This was Randy, a script writer for a reality T.V. series. No one knew which one.

 

 

 

"Well, what else can I do? I want to do something evil for once. After all, I've done good all my life, I want to be bad!"

 

 

 

"But you'll ruin your life! Please, Johnston, don't do it!" This was CatGirl, a fourteen year old who had somehow joined the group via the MMO, Real Life, they all played.

 

 

 

"But life is boring for me! I've delegated all the tasks in my company to people much smarter than I am, and I'm just a figure head..."

 

 

 

One of the members rarely talked, but he was very well respected, WarlordO'DARK. "Well you have the resources to get away with all sorts of crimes. How about the world's first supervillain? You know, rob banks, blow up bridges, hold those blasted orphanages hostage and steal all their teddies. That would be awesome to hear the news report."

 

 

 

"Naw... that's too insane. I could be a blackmailer! How about that."

 

 

 

Randy spoke up. "No."

 

 

 

CatGirl went next. "You're too honest, you don't have what it takes."

 

 

 

The rest of the group agreed with her. One of them, LightLesion, was laughing. He never seemed to add anything.

 

 

 

"Alright, so what can I do?"

 

 

 

"Hold the world hostage somehow? And then, be a completely nice guy. Affably evil, I think it's called. What about it? But here's the kicker, you don't actually do anything." This was one of the core members, Leroy. He was very into genre and tropes, nearly to the point of obsession. His knowledge of strange, and quite frankly useless information is second only to Randy.

 

 

 

Johnston thought this was a very good idea. "Crazy enough to work! So I stay a nice guy and I threaten everyone's destruction?! Awesome!"

 

 

 

"Johnston... odds are..."

 

 

 

"No, I'm doing this! I'll be the nicest supervillain ever! Just watch! So... how do I go about this?"

 

 

 

Groans were audible. Johnston was one of the smartest, but man could he be dumb some times! Leroy spoke up. "Okay, here's what you do! You are our leader, let's call you the 'big bad' now we need a dragon, which is your second in command. Because it's my idea I claim that position. Then you need an evil genius. Randy? And a Dark Chick... CatGirl! And a Brute. WarlordO'DARK? And, lastly, someone else who will show up eventually as a sixth wheel."

 

 

 

"Hey, I could go with that, what about the rest of you guys?"

 

 

 

CatGirl sighed. "I'll go along just to make sure you guys stay out of trouble. Mom's not going to like that... I claim my own costume! Within the theme, of course."

 

 

 

"We're villains now! We don't really need our mom's approval to do that! Sure, I don't see why not. In tradition of all evil villain teams, we'll be a 'black sophistication' theme. Sports coats... masks, the whole deal! Hey, and the guys who didn't get positions can be... the Legion OF DOOM!"

 

 

 

"I like Dark Riders!" "Death Squad!" "Dark Soldiers!" "I claim Captain!" This last comment came from LightLesion.

 

 

 

"We'll work on the name later guys, but my company will build you guys some awesome robot suits. How does that sound?"

 

 

 

"I'm sold!"

 

 

 

"Glad to hear it. Does the rest of the 'team' agree?" Indeed they did. "Alright! I'll plan something out! You guys work on the costumes. My soldiers of ... something as of yet undecided, your suits will be given to you later. We'll meet up on the thirtieth. CatGirl, there's some legal issues with you being underage doing clandestine things with a bunch of older people, get your parent's permission! Alright! Johnston! Evil Warl... Ov... Errr..."

 

 

 

"How about... the Magnificent Bastard!!" Came from Leroy. This was a compliment in his case, it meant the best and brightest evil villain around.

 

 

 

"Perfect!" Johnston signed off. This would be awesome. Now, to begin creating his suit. He had it planned already and he walked to his closet, in the bedroom of his luxury penthouse apartment. He pressed a button on his hundred button remote control and the T.V. went on. Wrong button... and wrong remote...

 

 

 

There it is! He picks it up and presses the proper button. The closet opens and he observes his midnight black, yet fashionable, sports coat and suit. It was your common evening dress clothes, but it was bullet proof and resistant to all forms of acid, poison and wine. Not even Merlot would stain it's whiteness. It was designed for dignitaries in unstable countries. However, his was not white, it was all black with a touch of red filigree weaving a delicate pattern along the seams. He even had a mask. It was like the Phantom of the Opera's, except jet black and it covered his hair as well. Yes... so evil!

 

 

 

Meanwhile... Leroy laughed his evil laugh! His plan had succeeded! Except, now that he thought about it, he didn't really have a plan and did this on the fly and now he had to go through with it. Oh well. "LEROY! STOP THAT RACKET!" Needless to say, he was a twenty-five year old living in his parent's basement. It's not that he didn't work, he just didn't seem to get a job that wasn't redundant after six months. Happened every time for the past four years after he left college with his Accounting degree.

 

 

 

He realized that he had to make up his own evil villain 'Black sophistication themed' suit and got to work. Since he was the Dragon, his suit had to complement the Big Bad... Butler suit? All black with a sniper/gun cane? Indeed!

 

 

 

Meanwhile... CatGirl ran downstairs and to the mall, which lived, fortunately for her, five minutes walking distance. She picked up her gear. She was thinking black evening dress with white highlights. But... sophisticated... and with a combat suit under it. Oooh! That choker would be a nice addition. She decided, instead of the overused black, elbow-length gloves, she'd wrap her two blackbelts, Jujitsu, a style of martial arts that use grappels, and Karate, which is considered a striking martial art, around her arms like a boa. Eventually she came home and pondered how to deceive her protective parents.

 

 

 

Simple! Just hide the permission slip Johnston emailed her with the school report papers. Also, the trip would be taken care of, her martial arts school, the only one in the nation that did both Jujitsu and Karate together, was doing an exposition in Jonston's city. They'd meet up.

 

 

 

For the first time, she realized just what she was getting into and decided not to care, unless one of the guys had been practicing martial arts his entire life, she would be relatively safe.

 

 

 

Meanwhile... Randy dug through his discarded scripts and took out one that involved this sort of situation. He sighed. He was evil genius... does that mean evil scientist... perhaps? He gets it! A midnight black lab coat, with a black tie and black polo shirt. Sophisticated scientist indeed.

 

 

 

Meanwhile WarlordO'DARK decided to just go with the flow. He would copy the suits that the bouncers that the local night club wore. Simple. He didn't really care about all that stuff, but it sounded fun. He also hoped he would be allowed to indulge in his sado-masochistic-homicidal-nihilistic pleasures. Mostly, it involved killing.

 

 

 

"Isn't that right, my dear?" His most recent conquest, literally, was a college peer who had spilled soda on him. Needless to say, she was very sorry.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So what do you guys think of this, eh?

[Bluejayfan94]

Good to see everything is coming back now