A couple of weeks ago, I managed to kill the Queen Black Dragon and earn a royal crossbow as well as my last Varrock Museum Kudos. That made me feel quite proud of myself and I felt that I was now really on the way of transforming from bad to badass.
So, I decided to start practising fight caves. Because fire cape. And because Karamja tasks. And because challenge.
After a couple of runs last weekend I now know how to get to Jad, to survive the first 62 waves. It took me some practise (again) but I figured out how to do it easily even with strategic safespotting and strategic use of the regenerate ability. I haven't been able to kill Jad yet. That prayer-switching definitely needs some more practise, but slowly I am starting to recognise Jads attacks. So, with enough patience I will get there.
What baffles me about myself and this, is how reluctant I am to do this. I am scared of dying. Or losing. Or both. Probably losing, since being scared of dying in the fight caves is even more silly than at the Queen Black Dragon. With the fight caves being a totally safe mini game, there is no harm done in losing and dying at all.
So I guess both Jad and the QBD have taught me that there's nothing wrong with taking a risk every now and then, and there's nothing wrong with losing every now and then. It doesn't diminish you as a person in the least (and naturally I wonder why I feel that way). And things will probably work out if you're patient and determined. And they also taught me that I somehow utterly and vehemently detest taking risks.
I very much wonder why.
And what I can do about it in real life. What risks have I avoided in real life? And what am I avoiding? And what beautiful things am I missing because of that?
There are interesting times ahead for sure. Maybe my psychologist is right and I really am in the middle of a midlife crisis.
Bring on the future!