The rain drummed against the glass windows, and bounced off them. The dim light coming from the moon light the room slightly. The occasional flash of lightning gave complete light for a split second, but that was only every now and then.

 

 

 

Greg placed the warm flannel onto HannahÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢s forehead. It was sad to see her like this, her mousy brown hair covering parts of her face, her cracked lips closed and dry. Her old blue jumper still damp, the writing on it fading. Her jeans ripped, and tatty.

 

 

 

Greg reached down under the bed, and pulled out a thick blanket. He carefully laid it onto her to keep her warm. He sighed a deep sigh, and looked out the window. Just as a lightning bolt lit up the sky, he saw a solitary silhouette walking down the hill towards the house. Greg panicked, with all the people disappearing these days, he had the right to be paranoid.

 

 

 

 

 

Not much to start with, sorry.

Should be "dim light coming from the moon lit the room slightly"

 

 

 

Other than that it appeared good even if the paragraphing was a bit short and the story seems a bit rushed. I mean normally a story will have a brief sort of introduction before saying, 'with all the people disappearing' Its a page 5 sort of thing, after a introduction to the scene and maybe the characters. One thing that lacks in many stories nowadays.

 

 

 

It seems like it could be interesting but I will have to wait to pass judgement on it though... :|