THIS IS THE STORY OF THINGS HAPPENING IN RUNESCAPE THAT JAGEX DOESN'T WANT YOU TO SEE!!!!

 

 

 

 

Our first story for tonight is how a lowly level 4 found an axe.

 

 

 

One fine day on a farm near Lumbridge a level 4 was walking around throwing fish bait at chickens hoping to increase his fishing level. He came across a bronze axe stuck in a stump with piles of firewood around it. He pulled it out and decided to keep it, sad idiot... He then went to Varrock's Blue Moon Inn and rented out a room, not that he'd ever pay the fee... He went to the tavern on the first floor of the inn and ordered a juice box with a bendy straw... As he was sucking out the juice a rather hot woman went up to him and laughed at how a grown man was still drinking from a juice box... The level 4 was laughing with her, not aware that she was laughing at him... Stupid noob... " Hey idiot I'm talking about you!" said the woman. The noob was shocked and looked at the empty juice box in his hand with disgust. "Well I'll just drink beer then," said the level 4 (whom we shall call

 

Bram). "Thats better," said the girl (who we shall now know as Britney).

 

So Bram ordered a frosty beer and drank it, he found the beer to his liking and soon he had 123 beer glasses on the floor beside him, his mind was fuzzy and he was soon entering a drunken rage, he grabbed his axe and ran to the center of town slashing at everyone in his way, soon he reached the fountain at the center of town and the king sent his entire battalion of guards after him, he couldn't see and amazingly dodged all of the hits thrown at him the guards however were not so lucky, they all met their end by the blade of his axe, soon Bram was at the palace gates he wandered through the gardens and soon reached the library where he killed Reldo and chopped up all of the shelves, destroying years of knowledge. He was soon at the throne room and he caught the King unawares and beheaded him, he went to the kitchens and killed the servants doing the dishes, and finally he went to the Queen whom he sliced into little bite-sized pieces, Jagex soon discovered the horrible massacre which had occurred in Varrock and quickly sent their best moderators and administrators there to kill Bram, when they found Bram he was asleep and they decided to lock him in a cell in Port Sarim where he was labeled mugger and there he stays forever enduring arrows shot at him by heartless adventurers and spell cast at him by aspiring magicians amazingly he's still alive, sober though.

 

 

 

THAT CONCLUDES OUR STORY FOR TODAY!

 

 

 

Hey peoples i can't find out about stories like this myself, post important news stories on this topic and help spread the word about whatever it is you're typing about!

Interesting...very interesting...But perhaps you could give is a slightly better title...Like...I don't know...

 

 

 

The Truth is OUT THERE

 

When Jagex lies

 

Tales of the UnExplained

 

 

 

 

 

Something like that..I was expecting a really good story that you had decided to call stupid because people want to know what you mean by stupid...anyway...Ummm It was a tad rushed and from the beginning I was expecting something like a half hour TV program that dealt with the conspisiese(SP) behin RS....and gave cold hard facts and linked them with tenous links, which you then back up with pointless statisitics, which when you look at it as a whole is stupid, but if you follow it you go...yeah that fits with that and that and that...And constructs a really good fiction by ommiting the facts that prove otherwise and giving a really bias story...