Spirrus Posted December 15, 2007 Share Posted December 15, 2007 Hello everyone :D This is my first story in this forum and it is the story of a young man who becomes dangerously addicted to Runescape and how he copes with it as it slowly destroys his life! Enjoy! : Please post your thoughts on my story when youre done reading it, remember, constructive critiscism only. All critiscms will be greatly appreciated. Table of Contents: Part 1- Discovering Runescape Part 2- Hooked Part 3- The Fatal End The Runescape Addict Part 1- Discovering Runescape It was another hot, sunny day as summer slowly came on to Jimmy Parson̢̢̮ââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢s little town. He was sitting, half asleep, in his history classroom, counting the seconds before the bell marking dismissal would ring. Jimmy was rather young , aged 13 and in the eight grade, with black hair, dark eyes, quite pale skin and was medially built. He was quite intelligent and athletic, but extremely lazy and talkative. On the verge of falling asleep, the dismissal bell finally rang and he woke with a start. He smiled, wrote down his history homework on Norse runes and quickly walked out of class, passing by his old, short history teacher who he always thought as someone who had no life. Heading out into the school halls, with students anxious to head home passing by, he was joined by his best friend, Mark Anthony, who was a skinny, funny guy with a positive attitude. ̢̢̮ââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¦Ã¢â¬ÅHow was your torture session?̢̢̮ââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâà Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xewleer Posted December 15, 2007 Share Posted December 15, 2007 Holy Moses that was a good story! I was drawn in and everything... Man... a most, most excellent read, thank you very much for posting this here! Anyway, concerning editing, no major grammatical mistakes that stood out, nothing that really bothered me, except for this, what was the nigerian man saying? I can't imagine what his accent sounds like ~desuuu~! (with pleasure...) I'll show you how terrifying a true Christian can be!It's Xewleer: ZEW le ar, got it memorized?Hermit of the Varrock Library and its proud guard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spirrus Posted December 15, 2007 Author Share Posted December 15, 2007 Thanks for the comment, I'm glad you liked it. And about the Nigerian man, when he says 'Heyccc mwa a bobyc' its just a sort of greeting, like heyyyy my brother. When he says 'How far?' its just asking you how are things. And when he says 'O boi!' it just means like you or boy and 'wetin happen?' means 'what happened?' . Lastly, when he says Nawow, its an expression, showing your sympathy or saying like 'That's terrible!' and about his accent its hard to describe so yeah.....I hope I cleared it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unoalexi Posted December 15, 2007 Share Posted December 15, 2007 Wow.. That was really, really good! I was laughing all the way!! :lol: You did have some grammatical errors though.. Nine kittens out of ten. Here be dragons ^ Dragon of the Day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kloffy Posted December 17, 2007 Share Posted December 17, 2007 Very disturbing :shock: but still great! And I even tried it myself, searching "rune" on google does bring up Runescape! Very accurate! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raven_gaurd0 Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Um. Woooooooow. I've played some hard stuff, but I've never heard of anybody getting that pissed off. When I played WoW (Quit about 8 months ago in favor of GW) somebody hacked and deleted my first 60. I was pissed, but I re-rolled. Addiction never got that bad for me. Still, enlighteningly brilliantly horrible. Blown out of prespection, but still. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now