Ash6110
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Posts posted by Ash6110
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Sell them! What you do is you wait for just the right time when someone gives you an offer that you like. And to prevent flames this is not scamming its merchanting :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll:
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So so not great but okay. Doctor this baby up, and finalize the story
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Ok, I think you are getting all your posts in this forum though :-k :-w :notalk:
Lay off if he wants to post here he can!
Good story keep it up!
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Bump please comment
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Nice story i give it a 8-) 8-) 8-) 8-) \ 8-) 8-) 8-) 8-) 8-)
Looking forward to part 2
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Idiotic yey somewhat funny
:-k
Perfect combination
8-)
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WARNING: This piece of writing contains some gory humor and some profanity
Rating: PG
Once upon a time there was a noob. He was very nooby. So nooby that nobody liked him; his name? Noob
Beginner's guide: Hellp, and welcome to runescape! This is a game that put players to the test with skills, quests, and money. Step right through this door to...
Noob: Is there pudding? I like pudding, its my favorite food
Beginner's guide: OMG n00b just step through the godamn door.
Noob: Okey dokey, pokey.
The noob stepped through the door literally, bled a lot and was hit 2 damage. The next person he was to terrorize em i mean learn from was the survival instructor
Survival Instructor: Okay noob its time to teach you how to survive!
Noob:Ur not can I be ur bf?!?!
Survival Instructor: EWWWWWW not with a noob like you!, anyways heres a bronze hatchet use it to cut down one of those trees.
Noob: Oh you mean like this?
At this time Noob swung the axe and landed it on the survival instructor. She bled horribly and died. After the mortician came and took her body away the noob went to the next instructor, the cook
Cook: I'm going to teach you how to cook
Noob: OMG stfu n00b
Cook: YOU CALLED ME A WHAT?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?
Then the cook took out a fileting knife and almost cut Noob before the wizard teleported and grabbed the cook right in tme
Mage: What the hell was that?!?!?!?!?!?!
Cook: Well sir um yeah
Noob: The mean instructor tried to cut me WAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Mage: You friggin moron! Do you know how much this guy could sue us for? We could go bankrupt and have to close the school. You know what? Ive had enough of your bullsh*t your fired!
Cook: Fine! You havent heard the last of me!
The cook walked away giving the mage and obscene finger gesture.
Mage: Hey noob, ill pay you 200k and let you return to the mainland if you dont sue us.
Noob: Ok. deal ill have my lawyer over here in a few minutes to pound out the details.
Mage: Oi, this is gonna be expensive
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I doubt they will ever change it but a respectable suggestion none the less
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Great idea!!!!!!!!!!! it would be so easy for JAGEX to do
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I dont support :wall: :wall:
Please think before posting :wall: :wall: :wall: :wall:
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Walkthrough: Start the quest by talking to Joeb (a new character) in the champion's guild. He will tell you that he found a crevase in the peace ful sheep farm above and east of draymor village, across from the guild. He tells you that there is a prophet there who may be able to restore peace between Saradomin and Zamorak. Then he tells you the bad news. The cavern has been overun by chaos creatures.
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Champion's quest
Difficulty: Hard
Length: Medium
Members: No
Required
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Skills: 30 Woodcutting, 30 Crafting, 38 Hitpoints, 28 Smithing, Must be able to kill a Level 99 enemy
Quests: Must have access to guild
Items: Hammer, Hatchet, 1 Coal, 5 pure essence
Suggested
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Skills: 30 Mining, 37 Magic, 50+ combat is an absolute must, you will be hit with a 37 at the end so be prepared, 43 prayer is highly suggested
Quests: Dragon Slayer
Items: Pickaxe, Full rune, Lots of food, Ammy of power, Teleport runes
Monsters
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Chaos Druids level 13
Black Knights level 33
Dark Watchmen level 49
Chaos Spirits level 56
Chaos Warriors level 87
Hetzkervenil level 99
Reward: 100k gp, 20 cut diamonds, Sword of Varze
Quest points:10
Walkthrough a liitle later
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Part 2: Betrayal, Espionage, and explosive results
Holy crap! I though to myself its Markandu? Thats f***ed up! What motive would he possible have in killing Murcaily? So I decided to question him. I walked into the law enforcement hut Markandu behind me. When we sat down I asked my first question. "So Markandu" I said cooly "I hear you own a cannon, is this true?" He responed giving the "I'm taking my rights" statement. I took out my axe: but it to his head, and shouted "Do I look like I give a f*** about your goddamn rights?!?!?!?!?! Then he whispered "It was me" under his breath. Pulling out his crossbow at the same time. He shot me twice and ran out the door just in time to miss the Rune axe that I threw at him. I pulled the axe out of the wall; knowing quite well that my suspect had gotten away. But I couldnt give up! I grabbed everything I could equip fromn the weapons rack and grabbed a lot of food and then set out to have a stakeout. Ando so I waited by the entrance to the jungle waiting for someting to happen. For several hours I waited until somebody was walking around the junlge border. I ran up and it looked a ton like Markandu. I caught him I did it! I thought. After I nabbed him I tied him to a board and he started speaking in a frantic voice. Im not Markandu he paid me, Im just a simple tribesman. Infuriated I decided to execute him on the spot. I untied his board and had him stand up at bow point. Then I pulled out the machete and put it deep into his groin upside down. Then after he said his final words I brutally sliced up to the top of his neck. I stood there watching as all his insides fell out and I put him under the white sheet and gave the call for fallen enemy. Then I waited more and more until I saw another figure dropping potons around the village. I sneaked up behind him and jumped him. This time it was Markandu. I tied him up to the board nd then I ran around like a chicken with its head chiooed off picking up the exploding potions and chucking them as far as possible in all direction. Then People who were very startled got out of bed just at the right time to see me hauling Markandu around town square. Then town's honorary police chief came out and exclaimed "holy sh*t you caught him!" Pretty soon Markandu was being dragged away and I was getting my medal of valor. "Whats going to to happen to Markandu?" I asked, "Well" said the police chief "Technically he committed the crime on Asgarnian land so were sending him to the white knight's fortress for a little working over." Theres just one thing left to do for me on this island, and that is to get the hell outta here. Thank you for reading my stories I hope you earn much wisdom from them.
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The End... A mystery and a ticket home part I
Everyone was shoocked to find out that Murcaily was murdered but we were even more shocked when i was announced that who ever found out who did it would get to go home. I decided that I had spent enough time on the goddamn island and I was gonna figure out who did it before anybody else. For about 10 hours straight I was looking for clues. Finally I found something unusual. Rusty cannon parts in the village. It had just rained the night of the murder so it was very possible that it was fresh. After that I realized that exploding potions couldn't of been the cause of the murder. It must have been a cannonball. After measuring up the size of one standard cannonball with what was left of Murcaily's had and face. Everyone thought a brodoo did it but I knew the truth. It was one of us! the villagers! And I only knew one person who owns a cannon Markandu.
Good Night more tomorrow!
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First off and foremost I am not plagirising. The origanal oh dear you are dead apperently was eaten by the page 51 monster so I am merely starting a new one here are some examples
You hear about people eating swordies, and you decide to try one called rune
Oh dear you are dead
You pick up your dds the wrong way
Oh dear you are dead
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You swing your axe at the tree.
A Dragon dagger(s) falls out
You pick it up by the wrong end
Oh dear you are dead
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Thers a language called ENGLISH!!!!!!!
ZOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! use it k?!?!?!?!?
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Yes i agree i have a friends name Hell's Jesus and hes a really good perosn
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Part 5: Hard Labor
Morale was high in Tai Bwo Wanna. The Brodoo was behaeaded and everything was pretty much back to normal. Biting into a ornage I recalled its lovely taste. Then Murcaily came up to me and told my to sharpen my machete because I was going to be chopping vegetation. When I got to where I was working I hacked at trees humming happily and occasionally chatting with other workers. The at lunch something happened. A swarm of Harpie bugs (attracted by our food) started savagely attacking. There twisting blade like attack was horribly painful but luckily Murcaily had a latern and he shined it at the bugs. They eventually went away and we continued eating. The rest of the day was spemnt again hacking at trees and nothing very interesting happened. But when I got into a camp I was in for a surprise. Murcaily was murdered. The murderer was sneaky, he had put 30 explosive potions in the chest in his room. He opened to chest and BOOM! no more Murcaily.
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Part 4
WARNING: This section contains very descriptive violence and gore.
My eyes were frozen into the distance. Beads of sweat came down upon my face. My arms were weary from the burden of my x-bow. But I knew that resting wasn't an option. I was gaurding the entrance again. And this time it was because Tribesmen fallen vitim to Brodoo were spotted by the gate. Ashadow appeared into the nightand surely enough it was a Brodoo. I raised my x-bow and started firing; plugging a whole clip into the victim. He gave a scream of agony but kept walking my way. I shoved another bot rack in and used about half of that clip before he fell down. Me and two other gaurds slowly approached him. As it turned out it took me 112 bolts to shatter his shell and then I hit him twice in the chest. There were two bolts sticking out of his discolored skin. He was still alive but his chest was gurgling blood. Another gaurd controlled the bleeding and I tied him up to a plank and took him in a nearby hut for questioning. This wasn't of much use because he couldnt speak english. Then the death sentence was issued and he was thrown into a celll. All and all it was a pretty good day. Nobody got killed!
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Part 3
Recalling these events in my head made me late so I ate part of a pineapple, pulled out my trusty machete, and walked to Murcaily's hut to see what I needed to do. Murcaily gave me an assignment that I hate; to stand at the entrance to the Tai Bwo Wanna jungle and keep watch. I was given a bamboo beating stick and as my main weapon I was given a Rune spear(kp). Two hours of keeping watch and nothing happened; just then a Tribesman came up ti the entrance and demanded access. I said no and he kicked me. I took out my bamboo stick and beat him senseless, then one of the other gaurds whom I befriended tied him up to a wooden plank, planted the plank upright and left the man there until he was taken away to prison. At lunch time I was switched to a hole digger because one of the other diggers was recovering from jungle fever. As I was digging (cursing to under my breath) a creature snuck up behind me. I turned around to see the creature (a jungle spider) crawl up behing one of my fellow diggers and bite him. The man screamed in pain grabbing his leg which was bleeding horribly. In a quick reaction I raised my trowel over the spider and smash down hard chopping it in half. I bent over with my first aid ration and tryed to help him but it was too late. I took out a body bag from the cart in town and gently placed him in it, and waited for the undertaker come and take him away. When the day was over I read the death chart in town square
Deaths frrom Tribesmen: 13
Deaths from spiders: 45
Deaths from fever: 102
Deaths from other animals: 167
Deaths from Jogres: 2
The man whose name turned out to be Johan was buried later that day. As I looked into the wooden box that held him I noticed many deep gashes in his leg and being a worker but also a medic ! determined his cause of death was bleeding. Then I payed my respects and left.
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Part two
I woke up in a dark cell next to a guy named Jimmy the rag. Although I was not dead, in fact I felt fine but later I would with that I had been because then I entered an unexplicable hell known as community service. I was found guilty of 2nd degree murder and I was sentenced to 19 months of prison and 1000 days of community service. Oh what a long nine months that was. I was locked away in a cell with a noob who was arrested for password scamming. When I finally got out I was shipped to Tai Bwo Wanna where I was to do my community service. Turns out what I was doing was chopping at obstrucuring plant life and shaking off aggressive locals.
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WARNING: This peice of writing will contain some intense action/violence, infrequent profanity and some mature themes
Rating: PG-13
Dawn was rising over Karmaja. My arms and legs were stiff and sore. This was Tia Bwo Wanna a remote village on the island of Karmaja. I was cleaning up the mess that had been made in Tai Bwo Wanna. And not only that; I was serving community service for the kingdom of Misthalin for my horrendous crime! I had been walking up the street in Varrock I was approached by two extremely drunk thugs. They started to pick a fight and when they threw a weak misguided punch I lashed out. First I pulled out my Dragon longsword and chopped the first one into 4 peices. Then I pull out my Torags Hammers and smashed his skull into peices splattering his patheticly sparse brains all over the place. Just as I finshed him off I felt a sharp pain in between my shoulders; the two more bursts of pain in my left thigh. Oh sh*t I thought as I went down to the ground. I had taken three bolts froma sniping gaurd. As I flailed in pain two guards came up to me. I tryed to get up and flee but a guard pulled out his nightstick and beat me with it. He landed one good blow on my arm breaking my upper arm bone and also landed a hit on my face giving me a bloddy nose and a broken jaw. The world started to sspin as the other of the two gaurds took out his sword and stabbed right though my side. Everything went white. I thought I was dead
Chapter 2 coming soon please comment
bored with runescpae :(
in Help and Advice
Posted
Become a member again all you have to do is ask your parents to take $5 out of your allowance every month for it
If not dont waste your time playing. If it bores you try reading and sports
Also moderating your playing so you dont play so much helps. I do it, you'll feel better and get bored less easily :D :D :D
Hope my advice helped.