Radman7000BCE Posted January 15, 2005 Share Posted January 15, 2005 Okay. This is gonna be a fantasy story I'm gonna write. Hope you like it! I'll add a chapter every week or something, who knows how long its gonna be So here it goes... Maedhros, Ghost Dancer of the Otherworld Chapter 1: Discovery Maedhros stared at the ring. Its beauty was too much to resist. She examined it carefully. It was crafted of the brightest of gold. There was a black gemstone embedded in it, which seemed to absorb all light around it, like a black hole, yet glittered like a chestful of diamonds. She heard the ring call out to her: "Pick me up... Put me on your finger... Let me rest in its warmth..." Or was that just her imagination? Maedhros felt pity for the ring, for it was a rasping, old voice, the kind that was exhausted from traveling on the road for too long. She answered, "But Mother will be angry, for she has always taught me to ignore things that talk for itself without a mouth." "Nonsense!" Replied the ring. "Your mother shall be most pleased at the gift you bring back. No one can resist Veneanar..." "That is your name?" Asked Maedhros. "Yes," it answered, "It was the name given to me when the master craftsmen of Avnar made me. Now put me on your finger... Let me rest in its warmth..." She had heard of Avnar before; it was the great crafting city, where the greatest and grandest forge of all the world was. "Very well," said Maedhros, "Surely Mother would not throw out something made in Avnar." So she picked up the ring... And put it on her finger. "Thank you..." Said Veneanar. And suddenly, an invisible force grabbed Maedhros by the finger and pulled her into the air. The force pulled Maedhros through a newly formed portal in the sky. Through it Maedhros flew, and when she dropped to the ground, she found herself in a completely alien world. So what do you think? If you have any comments, ideas, or questions, you can post here. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhys Posted January 16, 2005 Share Posted January 16, 2005 Did you get the idea from Tolkien's works? I'm sure the name Maedhros is from the Silmarillion and the whole ring thing sounds like Lord of the Rings. That aside, good story, very well written and I look forward to reading more. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radman7000BCE Posted January 16, 2005 Author Share Posted January 16, 2005 Yes! Someone replied! :D I might have (subconciously) borrowed the idea from Tolkien, although I never read The Silmarillion, nor any other books from him. :? I have an 1000+ page long one-volume edition from the Lord of the Rings, but I'm stuck on the first 50 pages. I did see the LotR movies though. I posted this on the Arenascape Stories forum friday, but nobody seemed to be reading it lol. So I posted it here too. Thanks for replying! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhys Posted January 16, 2005 Share Posted January 16, 2005 That is scary. :shock: I'm gonna' read the Silmarillion tonight just to make sure it is Maedhros, if you really haven't read the books then I'm truly astounded. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaGriffon Posted January 16, 2005 Share Posted January 16, 2005 is there a continuation? Small Children Scared Count:3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radman7000BCE Posted January 16, 2005 Author Share Posted January 16, 2005 Of course there's a continuation! It's gonna be the way they do anime shows in Japan: One episode each week. Oh and I admit it: :cry: the two names Maedhros and Veneanar were taken from the Elvish Name Generator (forgot the site), which happened to take its Elvish names from all of Tolkien's works. I'll never use the Elvish Name Generator again. So you can expect very weird names from now on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crimsonking Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 make the episodes longer then if your only doing one a week because I would like to read more ~^v^~Ex-Leader of the Divine Flames of Redemption~^v^~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radman7000BCE Posted January 19, 2005 Author Share Posted January 19, 2005 Okay! Longer chapters, Ill remember that! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radman7000BCE Posted January 22, 2005 Author Share Posted January 22, 2005 Thanks for all your comments and suggestions. You all actually care... *sniff* Anyways, without further ado, the second chapter to the Maedhros saga! (If it can be called a saga) Chapter 2: Disorientation Maedhros looked around at the world around her, dazed. It was green. She seemed to be surrounded in a wall of green. Even the ground was green. She looked upward, and noticed the wall was green too, with a few speckles of blue. When she looked carefully, she found that she was surrounded by pillars of green, that split off into multiple pillars as it went up. Maedhros reached out her hand to touch these strange pillars, then noticed a ring on her outstretched hand. It all came back to her, how the ring, called Veneanar, had tricked her into putting it on her finger, then teleported her into an unknown place. It seemed that her memories had been misplaced for a moment after teleportation. "You tricked me!" Maedhros said in anger. "It seems I did," said the ring smugly. It no longer seemed a weak voice, but a strong, deep voice. This made Maedhros so angry that she started banging the ring at a nearby pillar. It did no good, and the ring dug into her finger even harder. There she slumped to the ground, weak with despair. She found herself longing for home, even for her mother, who beat her if she did not work. Then, suddenly, a voice emerged from the woods. "Where did you say the ghost was, Charlie?" It said. "Over there, Ben. It appeared out of this great big hole in the air." A second voice replied. Maedhros stood up. If there was a ghost in these parts, she should better go. And then the owner of the voice came out of the pillars. "There it is, Charlie!" Maedhros turned around, and found the boy, with his friend, pointing at her. "There it is!" The other shouted too. "Let's slay it!" Ben shouted. "Yeah! Then Pa will realize that we aren't babies anymore!" Charlie replied. "Yeah!" "Yeah!" Then they drew their knives, and charged at Maedhros. Maedhros poised to run, but a force stopped her. It was the same one that pulled her through the portal. "We fight..." Said Veneanar. Maedhros was forced to turn around, and to face the boys in battle. Then the spirit inside the ring completely took over. Veneanar weaved through the boys' stabs like flowing water. Maedhros's assaulters were taken aback. They were confused, for Veneanar was so nimble in his movements that the assaulters thought that he had disappeared altogether. Then Veneanar swept up from behind and snatched a knife from Ben. He was startled, and found his knife missing. Ben stared at his empty hands, and whispered, "The Ghost Dancer!" Veneanar engaged in a knife-fight with the Charlie. Veneanar's knife was swift, and Charlie could barely keep up. Then Ben took his throwing-knife out from under his shirt, and flung it as hard as he could toward Veneanar. Veneanar turned around, and found a knife traveling right at his face. He made an effort to dodge, but the knife flew fast, and it arched down to scratch the ring on Veneanar's finger. It deflected, but it did as much harm as if the knife had gone through his arm. Veneanar's knife dropped to the ground. Veneanar fell. "No..." He whispered, and withdrew into the ring. Maedhros had control again, but she was on the ground, as Ben regained his knife, and they closed in for the kill... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crimsonking Posted January 22, 2005 Share Posted January 22, 2005 Its about time I was starting to think you would never continue it ~^v^~Ex-Leader of the Divine Flames of Redemption~^v^~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radman7000BCE Posted January 22, 2005 Author Share Posted January 22, 2005 Well, it is continued once a week. *cough*read the posts*cough* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radman7000BCE Posted February 1, 2005 Author Share Posted February 1, 2005 I'm sorry for the HUGE delay, i couldn't go online this weekend, sorry about that, anyway, here's the next chapter. Chapter 3: Encounter The two boys, Ben and Charlie, closed in on Maedhros. She tried to back away, but she bumped into a tree stump and couldn't back away farther. They closed in. Maedhros closed her eyes, expecting two knives to burst through into her gutÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢â∠Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crimsonking Posted February 16, 2005 Share Posted February 16, 2005 Its been way over a week now. ~^v^~Ex-Leader of the Divine Flames of Redemption~^v^~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhys Posted February 16, 2005 Share Posted February 16, 2005 Well over a week... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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