I'm trying to turn my face away from the computer, yet my tear filled eyes are glued to the screen, tears splash sending ripples throughout the universe. Saddness fills my heart as the text keeps on coming, knowing I'll never be the same.

Dude, you need 3 sentences for a paragraph... indentation etc.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And what is the point with all these minuscule stories! graarrr!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sorry about that... anyway, what's the story behind this? Kinda curious!

I'm trying to turn my face away from the computer, yet my tear filled eyes are glued to the screen, tears splash sending ripples throughout the universe. Saddness fills my heart as the text keeps on coming, knowing I'll never be the same.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I really like it! I think it needs a teeny touch of grammatical editing, read it through to yourself a few times and add in commas, take them out, add short words etc, to check it sounds right.

 

 

 

I very much like it even on its own - and it's very abstract I'm not sure it needs a story to go with it.

 

 

 

=D>

I'm trying to turn my face away from the computer, yet my tear filled eyes are glued to the screen, tears splash sending ripples throughout the universe. Saddness fills my heart as the text keeps on coming, knowing I'll never be the same.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nicely done. It's so short, but it shows a strong emotion. Bold is my favourite part. It shows the obvious enormity of the mysterious situation.

aww thanks guys, and Issy that means a lot coming from you!

very cooooooooooooooool i must have missed all the short story writing lately. :D

 

 

 

Offtopic: Do you like my new sig??????????gb :lol:

 

 

 

I think that short quality pieces of writng are far better than longwinding boring pieces of writng i'm glad you wrote this!!! :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

Lol, love the sig lee :wink: thanks for your kind comment. I'll post it on your shorter writing thread :)

Thankyou luv your sig as well!!!!!! :

thanks