Babybyers Posted July 2, 2007 Share Posted July 2, 2007 Wow. I have been gone from this site from ages, hopefully there are some familiar faces around. I have slightly changed my style, I got really distracted with poetry and film making. But I will make this return, hopefully it isn't temporary. Heres my newest peice, I have 2-3 parts done ahead, but I will post in a manner that leaves you with a regular post/update. So here is the intro.... Untitled Story Chapter 1.0 Byron tumbled down the stairs, breaking the railing and some steps as he went. The weak wood cracked and snapped beneath his weight. His foot caught near the bottom and sent him flying through the air. He flew right through the unlatched wooden door into another, an un-expecting adventurer, who was knocked to the ground, Byron atop of him groaning from his fall. The adventure pushed Byron off of him, and slowly returned to his feet, he was panicky. ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¦Ã¢â¬ÅWho are youÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ what the heck just happened!ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâà The Carter III"I can get your brains for a bargain, like I bought it from Target.Hiphop is my supermarket, shoppin' cart full of fake hiphop artists." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archimage_a Posted July 3, 2007 Share Posted July 3, 2007 Yeah I am still kicking about...Ummm not sure about anyone else...alot of people have got bored and left...or just sort of turn up randomly. Anyway I thought it was pretty amazing stuff... Sort of like the idea that someone who we don't know is the main character and the main character is knocked out...gives a sort of aire of mystery and suspence... http://www.uzzisoft..../archimage.jpegWell I knew you wouldn't agree. I know how you hate facing facts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
powerent Posted July 5, 2007 Share Posted July 5, 2007 It has a bit of mystery in it, and could be built upon. What is the history behind it? Who is this Byron, and who is the adventurer? There's a lot you can answer in the next parts. You have no idea how powerful words are....until they hit you in the head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archimage_a Posted July 5, 2007 Share Posted July 5, 2007 And you are a bit behind Byers...2 days? http://www.uzzisoft..../archimage.jpegWell I knew you wouldn't agree. I know how you hate facing facts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Babybyers Posted July 5, 2007 Author Share Posted July 5, 2007 Sorry guys, Im working on it, I had to work full time this week BUT! I have 5 days off now =) The Carter III"I can get your brains for a bargain, like I bought it from Target.Hiphop is my supermarket, shoppin' cart full of fake hiphop artists." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
powerent Posted July 6, 2007 Share Posted July 6, 2007 OK, as long as you get the next part onto here I'll be able to comment on it. You have no idea how powerful words are....until they hit you in the head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Babybyers Posted July 9, 2007 Author Share Posted July 9, 2007 New part up. Pleaseee don't say anything like "It isn't going fast enough, where's the action?" Cause that's coming up okay? -.- Enjoy =) The Carter III"I can get your brains for a bargain, like I bought it from Target.Hiphop is my supermarket, shoppin' cart full of fake hiphop artists." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archimage_a Posted July 9, 2007 Share Posted July 9, 2007 I don't know...wheres the actions JK Anyway I thougt it was good, it was well written and felt like a story. It was going along at a pretty good pace and the gental humor completed the picture... On the Negative side of the coin....Don't try to do too many more dramatic moments...it didn't really feel dramatic, it felt a bit rushed, and a bit normal... http://www.uzzisoft..../archimage.jpegWell I knew you wouldn't agree. I know how you hate facing facts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
llamster Posted July 9, 2007 Share Posted July 9, 2007 Great story so far. Keep it up. Ah, this reminds me about the noob on the Runescape forums who was upset with the quest "Cold War" because apparently his grandparents died in the war. :wall: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest smither213 Posted July 10, 2007 Share Posted July 10, 2007 nice... dang cool story :D =D> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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