I get Bill Gates to destroy the fort for me. Seeing as he's the richest man alive, the aura of greediness does not affect him. He destroys the fort in some technological way, and we split the money 50/50.

 

 

 

My new fort is surrounded by vicious Rockhopper penguins and dangerously thin ice.

I get Bill Gates to destroy the fort for me.

 

Clever, but play fair.

 

Thin ice, eh? I use hover boots to get around that. As for those penguins, I blow them up with explosive helicopters (ROFLcopter :lol: ). Fort is now mine.

 

 

 

The fort is guarded by a swarm of bad ads.

Firefox Ad Blocker.

 

 

 

However, I decide to leave your fort alone after rendering it helpless. Then I blow it up. Then I build my new fort out of SOLID PAPER. Reinforced with PAPER CLIPS and ERASERS.

 

 

 

I fill the area with laughing gas and intense radiation. Then I take the entire thing and throw it into the internet.

I send thousands of viruses and spam e-mails to your fort and then turn off your internet connection. I think your fort is now destroyed enough. Too bad I didn't get the chance to recycle all of that paper, what a waste of trees..... :cry:

 

 

 

My new fort is entirely surrounded by electric, barbed wire fences, and guys that'll do this: --> :wall: except not to brick walls, to you! Muhahahaha!

However, a rainstorm blows in just as all this is set-up. The electric fence goes haywire and the :wall: get fried, you get zapped, and the fort gets a new power source. :lol:

 

I get a new fort, guarded by the worst things the internet has to offer...

I pull the cable out of your modem...problem solved

 

 

 

i take the fort and surround it with my spam

Spam Guard. Pop-Up Blockers. Anti-Spam bullets. =;

 

I then eject you from the fort.

 

It's mine now, so I re-install new internet (wireless, who knew?), but something went wrong and now I have creatures from internet games rampaging all in and around my fort! :ohnoes:

 

I disappear. (not safe :anxious: )

I unplug your internet and the the creatures cease to exist...

 

 

 

I surround my fort with spam...(the meat product thing)

I unplug your internet and the the creatures cease to exist...

 

Um... I believe that the internet was wireless, whatever.....

 

 

 

I call the Spam Canning & Packaging Co. and they get right to work at packaging the spam, and take it all away.

 

 

 

My fort is surrounded by a impenitrable, invisible force field powered by thousands of tiny gerbils running on tiny tredmills. They're also trained to gnaw anyone's face off who tries to get in.

Yes, the internet was wireless, so wizjany failed to get past the fort defenses. But I'll roll with this anyway.

 

I pop your barrier with a ESM (Electro-Shock Missle), which destabilzies all force fields, but doesn't destroy them, so I walk though.

 

I use very thickly padded gloves to round up the gerbils and begin chucking them, Chinchompa-style, at you. You run out, screaming in pain, and trying to get the gerbils off you. I round up and dump the rest of the gerbils in a box, shipped to Asia.

 

 

 

The new fort has cup holders. Lots of cup holders. Armed with highly potent, penetrating lasers. Also keeps drinks cool.

 

It's also protected by a self-designed SSS (Satillite Shielding System.). Good luck destroying the satillite, it's armed with all sorts of anti missle, nuke, and personal defenses...

I unplug your internet and the the creatures cease to exist...

 

Um... I believe that the internet was wireless, whatever.....

 

 

 

 

then it'll be your wireless router...

 

 

 

 

 

I bombard it all with smilies... :ohnoes: \ : :thumbsup: -.- :-# :D :) ;) :(

 

 

 

and it gets destroyed...you forgot anti smiley missiles

 

 

 

my new fort fits in my ear...so, good luck...

Meh...

 

I cut off both your ears, and shake the fort out of one of them.

 

I then stomp on it, since it's so small.

 

New fort, guarded by ramen and poisoned ramen. Catch is, they both look the same.

I attack it with an army of chopsticks...

 

the accidentally destroy the fort while their at it..

 

 

 

My new fort is so big, the earth is in a helmet in the armory...

Seeing as your fort is so big, it's gravitational pull attracts all of the nearby planets, asteroids, and whatever else is floating nearby. Yay, physics destroyed your fort for me! :

 

 

 

My new fort is underwater in the bottom of the deepest trench on earth. Don't worry, it's protected from all of the extreme pressure and other pesky troubles that come with being at that depth of the sea. Just try to get down here, you'll be crushed within seconds! :lol:

You do remember you're dealing with me, right? Nothing's impossible.

 

I get a submarine. Not a normal submarine, obviously. It's hyper-duraplated with 5 layers of titanium-carbon alloy, fortified by a diamond infra-webbed structure, which is fortified by a secret carbonite alloy that I just recently created. Guranteed to withstand pressures of up to 100T AMU or triple your money back.

 

So I use that to get into your fort. So much for that idea.

 

I place an array of remote bombs around your shielding, set to go off after I reach dry land. So i do so, and your fort gets crushed under 100 trillion gallons of water (give or take a about 3-10 trillion)

 

 

 

New fort is mine, and it's, well, not quite really there.

 

It's "Interdimensional", its between "planes" of reality. Just like my ever-so-present research research station.

 

Disclaimer:this is not my research station and doesn't even close to resemble it in any way, shape or form. I am not responisible for anyone delusions, broken bones, or bruised egos that may occur.

You do remember you're dealing with me, right? Nothing's impossible.

 

Of course I remember i'm dealing with you. ;)

 

 

 

Because of your tampering with different planes of reality, a rift in space and time opens up and severly cripples what defenses your fort had. I then use my.... REALITY PLANE!!! (as in airplane- hey, it doesn't have to make sense) to fly to the area between dimensions your fort resides in, and unleash my army of inter-dimensional penguins on your fort. They peck at your fort until it is reduced into a pile of inter-dimensional rubble. You can keep your research station though, I don't really care if it survives or not. I'll leave it untouched.

 

 

 

My fort is surrounded by black holes. Luckily, my fort can't get sucked into any of the black holes, nor is it affected by the tidal forces or the distortions in time. Unfortunately, I can't really explain why.... :?

You can keep your research station though, I don't really care if it survives or not. I'll leave it untouched.

 

You MIGHT want to care. I've been researching new, bigger, more powerful, dimension-ending weapons there. Sadly, you can't really get near it. (all unauthorized personal WILL be phazed, tazed, and all matter of destroyed.)

 

And if you can't explain why a fort defense works, then it works...AGAINST you. Your fort proceeds to fall into the black hole.

 

New fort, guarded by (yes, it's back!) DOOOOOOM!. It's got revenge on it's mind.

 

Back to the research station then...

but all the cows MOOOOOOd! at it...

 

and it collapses

 

 

 

my fort is on several million dimensions, so to destroy it, you have to destroy all the dimension...

...Or I can just use the same tech I use for my fort to "pull" your fort into one plane. I then tear your fort apart with a barrage of Destroyer Rays before it can phase out.

 

 

 

My fort is guarded by a bunch of T.V.s. They only look harmless though...

i pull the plugs on all of them and take the fort over

 

 

 

 

 

my fort is guarded by non existence...

So I add four parts existance, two parts frozen mecurity, one part copper, and three parts cup holder.

 

The math behind it doesn't add up. However, your fort explodes anyway.

 

New fort, guarded by distractions, fireworks, and a person who goes "urg" at everyone who passes by.

Seeing as it's been four days since this game has seen a new post, your guy that goes "urg" gets distracted, bored, and goes home. As for your fireworks, I make it rain using my incredibly advanced weather machine. The raindrops cause your fireworks to explode prematurely, and very close to the ground as you launch them. One explodes close enough to the ground where it starts a fire that burns all of your distractions to a pile of smoldering ash. (Trust me fireworks explode very close to the ground in the rain, happened at a 4th of July fireworks to me afew years ago, luckily, nothing got caught on fire : ). After the fire gets put out by the rain, I'm free to sneak into your fort undistracted, and plant a small explosive device that destroys the whole thing after I leave.

 

 

 

My fort is protected by that same guy that goes "urg", except I've taught him how to use a rocket launcher, and I'm paying him more, so I doubt he'll leave. There is also an incredibly long car race going on around the perimeter of my fort.

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISTION!

 

 

 

The spanish inquisition attack with their weapons of fear, surprise, ruthless efficency, an almost fanatical devotion to the pope, and nice red uniforms! They lead the guy who says "urg" to the "rack" and ties him down. When that doesn't work they poke him with the soft pillows! Then they put him in the... COMFY CHAIR! :ohnoes:

 

He submits and I take the rocket launcher to make a massive pileup of cars.

 

I walk in and hit you over the head. Then leave because there is written in the commercials of watching old monty python!

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISTION!

 

I know I wasn't excepting that. :shock:

 

(swift, but deadly.)

 

The empty fort goes to me. It's guarded by sensible senseless. (hmm...)

But eventually I make sense of this non-sensible use of the word sense, and make my way into your fort. I then procede to destry the fort with a large sledge hammer.

 

 

 

My fort is guarded by Goggle. Ha! Now when you try to search for my fort, you'll have to search through a million other things first! (And that's why ask.com is better)