The No Where Story- basicly a story that may go on forever.

[archimage_a]

It was a friday and I need to go to Valrock to buy an onion but I needed a cabage because the old man at the farm traded oinons for cabbages. Because he belived that onions where evil and cabbages were not, in fact he thought that cabbages were rather good. His wife had choked on a whole onion you see and he had forced a cabbage down her throut and the onion fell in to her stomach. But she left him for shoving the cabbage down her throut, so she went to live with her uncle. He lived in Draynor and It was a long walk away, so she traded a onion for a cart ride down to Draynor and on the way they went bay a house. The house was old and spooky, It was owned by a vampire that lived in the basement. That was because he feared the sun light, so he stayed in a coffin. The coffin was made from teak all the way from Karamaja. Karamaja was an Island that made very good rum, there was a pirate that lived on the mainland who loved the rum. But he was not able to go to Karamja, this was because of the customs officer. She was not very nice, because she had a girl living with her. The girl had left her husband because he had stuck an cabbage down her throut, he lived near Valrock. Valrock was a big city that had two banks, two anvils and a castle. The castle was owned by the royels, they owned the entire town including a magic sword called silverlight. Silverlight was used to slay big powerful demons, one that lived outside the town in a ring of stone. There was another ring of stones but that was very far way near Tavenly, thats where the druids live. The druids always have followed Guthix, He is a really powerfull god. There are two other main gods but lots of other smaller or backseat gods. There where lots of these smaller gods but they had few followers, This was because of a war. The war was really bid and lot of Gielnor was destroyed. Gielnor was where I lived. I had a small house and lot of cabbages but I don't like them that much. I prefer ham but I can't find anyone to sell it to me, so I have to make do with onions. I dont have onions eathier but I knew someone who did. I once found an onion seed but I needed two others or I would run out of seeds, when they grew. So I went to Draynor seed market. Near the seed market was a house with a old man in. He was really evil and nearly blew up the bank and the wizard tower. The wizard tower was really far south but it wasnt as far down as a dwarf. The dwarf was really really far down, he was so far down he couldn't get to his red berry bush to make red berry pies. Pies where very nice but were hard to make unless you had the right ingredience, meat pies where easy to make if you lived in the big city because of the rats. Rats were very small and went round and round in little circles, But would run away if a cat chased them. Cat are really smart because they can talk if you have an amulet. The amulet is very hard to make so only certain people have one, they come from a city in the desert. The desert is a really sandy place. Sand is really just really small rocks. Rocks are pieces of stone that if you bang togther you get sand and bones. Bones are white sticks that hold your body up. Body is a type of rune they are used in curse spells. Curses are spells that are able to make someone unlucky. Luck is really a state of mind. Mind is a also a type of rune. Rune is a blue metal that is really hard and damaging to over people. I found a Rune dagger once, I sold it off for a life time supply of beer. Beer is a liquid that is is intoxicating and more dangrous than any poison. Poison is normally a greenish shade of green. Green is a relaxing and the shade of grass. Grass is what cows eat. Cows make milk and beef. Beef is a meat and needs to be tenderized with big hammer. A war hammer is just a Lump of metal tied to a stick that Whacks down on something. The metal needs to be quite heavy otherwise its not very powerful. So anyway, I was going to Valrock with a cabbage when I saw a gold peice on the floor...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Please continue or something, If you attempt to finish the story I have a backup plan)

[dragoncmd]

when I saw a gold piece on the floor... intrestingly enough gold is what jewelry is made from. you can mine gold and combine it with gems to make cool stuff. for some reason gold pieces can't make cool stuff. the cool stuff often has magical properties. My favorite type of cool stuff make me rick but doesn't work. So my second favorite type makes me strong and lets me break the speed of light. the speed or light just so happens to be squared in the E=mc2 but I don't know that cause Enstien hasn't been born yet. Enstien was this guy who made a weapon out of uranium. Uranium is an element like gold. So after I saw the gold piece I picked up up and strange stuff happened...

[archimage_a]

strange stuff is something that isn't normal. Normal is a perseption. A perseption is spelled wrong. Wrong is the opposite to right. Right is like left. Left is what i have when i have traded...

[dragoncmd]

left is what I have when I have traded a penut for an elephant. elephants are intresting creatures. Penuts are too except they aren't creatures. the most intresting creature in existence is the Ravaging bugbladder beast of trall which is so mind bolggilingly stupid that it thinks if you can't see it it can't see you. by coincidence this provides the perfect survival mechanism for sentient beings that encounter it. A survival mechanism is a method of survival methods of survival are extremely useful for abyssal demons. Abyssal demons do not have a survival mechanism other than giving up whips. Whips are useful tools because of their strecheness and the pain they causebut while I was in varrok the strange thing was that a whip was attacking its wielder...

[xxept0]

But really, a whip cna't attack it's owner because it isn't alive. Something that isn't alive doesn't have brains. But really, brains are disgusting things. All squishy with cells that die every minute. But then those cells dont go back to lumbridge, where all the noobs are. If there weren't any noobs, there wont be phr33 st00f p10x now would there? So i watched as the guy died from a bewitched/cursed whip. he was wearing aphat, so....

[archimage_a]

Where was I... oh yes it was a friday, and I was hungry so I wanted a stew. Stews are made of veg and meat. Veg and meat are diffrent because of 2 things. 2 thing is the opposite to no things but the same as half of 4 things. A half is not a number. A number is not a number. It is 2 words. 2 words isn't a word or a number it is both. Both means 2 things. 2 things is 2 things, a number and a letter. A letter is another name for an posty thingy. A thingy is used by someone who does not know what the thing is but can't spell the thing. But anyway Valrock has lots of magic around it but I needed a potatoe. I am wishing I didn't high alch my old potato. High alching is magic and I once traded a cabbage for a nature rune but the rune was fake so I sold it to someone for a potato. But that was the one I high alched. I only got a few gp but still. A still is some thing used in making beer. Most notable moonshine, which uses potatoes. A glass of it is nice with some stew but then I would need two potatoes. So Valrock has alot of magic, from runes. But runes are letters in fact so I'm not sure why they are called magic. But anyway...

[KnightLite]

I got up to go see my dog when I tripped and fell on my head, getting severe internal damaging to my brain. The doctors have given me 20 minutes to live, so I have to finish the story by then..

[archimage_a]

But then I woke up to discover that I had been hit on the head. I once had a head of cabbage but I ate that. Bilpo has lots of cabbages. But he never sells them. Sells is like a word but its opposite is buy. Buy is funny cos its lots of different things. Things is a term. A term is a time scale at school. School is a prisn for kids. I had a kid once. I called him billy. He grew up into a goat. He tasted good. But I still need that onion for my stew...

[seanite]

But I forgot the potatoes oh waht will I do?...