Might get a bit boring towards the end, I kind of ran out of funny as I got more tired and it’s like 7 AM right now l FIRSTLY, A WORD FROM SOME OF OUR SPONSORS Update of the top 15(9) Dec 3rd – Dec 25th 1. S U O M I : 5,02B xp (+0). After smashing through the hiscores last month at a casual rate of over 9000 faps per experience point and with a cunning grin that appears to exclaim something along the lines of “L0o9000p-0[9p0o0ol09lL these kids don’t have five billion XP in twenty-fourteen,” our retired Finnish king sits calmly atop his leaderboard throne this month with not a Bing12342001 yelling at him to get off of his lawn in sight. Heck, the guy is probably enjoying Christmas with his relatives while the rest of us are still trying to catch an awkward silence so we can go run back up to our rooms and gain our XP. Good on you man, you earned your break. Merry Christmas! Coming milestones: Probably nothing spectacular until the release of Inventor. 2. Jake : 4,62B xp (+20M). Our friend Mr. Jake “RANK TOO” Tezzer continues mainly to divinate this month, of which he recently passed the 50M XP milestone in. Amongst his many other endeavors such as his daily agility challenge laps and his epic quest to figure out how to use the Surge ability (old joke I know, sorry) Jake keeps racking in the warbanding gains with mostly Mining and a side of Smithing. One might be skeptical of our reigning silver medalist’s month, however he is busy putting most of his effort into his account on the 2007 servers, which is called “Jake 2007” and (suspiciously?) is also a player moderator. Although he seems relatively safe for now, his rank two title, a position he’s impressively held for well over two years (with the occasional rank one due to a hiscore glitch and runefest golden gnome award Suomi-coordinated conspiracy), might be challenged by certain combination of an instrument and firearm in the coming months. Coming milestones: 200M Fishing (Maybe?), 150M Smithing 3. Drumgun : 4,54B xp (+68M). Drumgun and the members of his church rejoice once again this month, not only because of the seasonal festivities (actually nevermind, they’re probably also busy nolifing the rune of the scape scapes too) but also because our resident drummer has finally closed the divination race, permanently clenching his second rank one spot, or third if those loki and ry4n guys never renew their memberships for Magic. Rank one in not two, but THREE skills? That Lover Romeo guy better watch his back… Mr. Dumgun has now moved on to tanking out the rest of Thieving, a skill he started as a means to finish off the month of his legendary Summoning week back in 2010. He should literally finish the skill in less than half a week while keeping up some casual warbanding gains on the side such as Smithing. In addition to finishing off 200M Divination this month, he also achieved the 100M milestone in both the Farming and Herblore skills. Coming milestones: 200M Thieving (21st) 4. Jdelacroix : 4,46B xp (+29M). As consistent as always, this month we see Mr. Lacroix train a mixture of Woodcutting, Fishing, Runecrafting, and Divination. In addition, our resident family man seems to boast some decent Mining gains from the warband scene, some modest Agility and chronicle Hunter gains, all while racking in the $$$ from his comp sci job, taking care of his kids, and somehow always managing to get trolled 90% of the time (http://puu.sh/4H1NS). It also seems as if this fellow is trying to ‘troll’ his fans by pretending to be efficient via leaving multiple combat stats right on the brink of 200 million XP. Coming milestones: 50M Divination and Fishing, 200M Melees (eventually), Ranged (eventually), and Magic (eventually) 5. Dragonseance : 3,99B xp (+31M). (Whoa wait wait wait wait wait… You’re trying to tell me that this guy STILL isn’t #1 yet?) This month, the newly minted Trimmed Completionist decides to finally start working towards his long forgotten promise in his videos that Hunter will be his next 200M XP stat… almost. Mr. Seance mainly trained Divination this month, suggesting that he is trying to optimize the amount of collateral Hunter XP he can obtain from chronicles before having to finish up at Draconics. On the sides Dseance manages to keep up his daily Mining gains from warbands, his book of char XP, Farming runs, and a bit of Crafting as well. Coming Milestones: 4 Kilometers, 50M Fishing, 150M Firemaking, 200M Prayer (eventually, lol8kxpoff), 200M Magic (eventually, 220k xp off), 200M Theiving (eventually, lol17kxpoff), 200M Construction (eventually, 60k xp off), and 200M Runecrafting (8k xp off, seriously this guy is a better xp troll than Jdel), and #1 (Amidoinitrite?) 6. Elvis : 3,85B xp (+4M). From the guy who invented various hit tracks such as “Eye of The Tiger,” “We Didn’t Start The Fire,” and the Donkey Kong theme song, Mr. Elvis continues to chill atop the hiscores after having recently achieved 99 Divination, with no other pesky top page Swedes all up in his grill trying to mimic his name in sight. Despites his relative inactivity, Elvis still manages to put some XP gains up on the board just for the sake of his fans who’ve admired him over the years. He managed to barely train almost every skill he wasn’t already 200M xp in, with a main focus on Divination, Hunter xp from chronicles, and a bit of Construction as well. Coming Milestones: Nothing in sight right now, possibly 50M Hunter from chronicles 7. AlmostLost : 3,84B xp (+35M). Your friendly neighborhood warband host manages to dish out a variety of skills this month, gaining XP in Attack, Woodcutting, Firemaking, Hunter/Div, Agility challenge, and, of course, Mining from le warbongs. He passed the 150M milestone mark in Attack and Firemaking this month, and also 50M Diviantion. Word is Mr. Richard plans to switch to Smithing and Mining tents in the coming months so we might see him pass the 100M Smithing mark in due time as well. He is back at working again now, and is still keeping up with the rest of his fellow top pagers, a most impressive feat. Thanks for all the effort you put into bands man, keep up the good work! Coming milestones: 100M Smithing 8. Goud (Previously Geel): 3,79B xp (+10M). Finally, back from the dead! Our friend (who seems to now be mysteriously synonymous with cake) went astray and has now returned from his slumber. Word on the street was that he had to catch up with some school things, but it looks as if Mr. Bart is back in action for the time being. He’s only been back a week folks, but has already managed get back up to a 5M XP day yesterday, constituting 50% of his entire monthly gain since his return. Maybe it might be a tad too early to tell, but it looks as if he’ll get right back into the groove as if nothing ever happened. For now, Bart decides to leave his Divination days behind him (edit: nevermind, just saw him at Div) and goes hard on Ranged and Defence, with some char Firemaking XP gains in addition to the occasional warband, Agility challenge, and Farm run gains. Coming milestones: 100M Mining, 100M Strength, 150M Ranged, 150M Slayer, and 200M Firemaking (13th) 9. Elias : 3,72B xp (+0). The former “World Ranking #0” fellow, who has yet to even log in since the release of Divination, quite obviously has not gained a single experience point since. However, he is now a university student studying Biomed or some nerdy crap, so who even has time to play this game anyway? For now though, Elias will continue to remain forever in the shadow of Elvis. 10. Paperbag : 3.68B xp (+13M). It’s all about Agility guys. Basically Mr. Kevin here has been doing nothing but tanking out Agility this month, possibly training so that one day if Lemar comes back he’ll be able to catch him in flight a little faster this time around. Nothing much else to say here other than to admire this guy’s dedication, he’s come a long ways motivation wise since his ‘burn out’ in 2011 when not even he himself thought he would ever play the game again. Even if it isn’t the most macroefficient to be training Agility before the rumored upcoming Agilityspan right now, it shows he’ll be able to tackle anything that comes his way at this point and that he values the personal accomplishment of doing it the hard way over any overall ranks he might have gained for being more conventionally efficient. Coming milestones: 100M Agility 11. Alkan : 3,57B xp (+125M). Guess who’s been reppin the big d-(http://puu.sh/5Y1mg) #gainz this month? Alkan is our second biggest di- I mean XP gainer this month, outpacing the preceding gainer (Drumgun) by almost twice as much XP. He managed to dish out three 200M skills this month, Ranged, Defence, and Summoning. Mr. number1bossman has managed to train almost every skill he has left this month, with strong gains all around, mostly in Slayer, Magic, Firemaking, Mining from warbands, and of course, Summoning. He should finish off Slayer relatively soon, most likely within the week, a skill he’s been training for quite some time now. Coming milestones: 50M Hunter, 100M Mining, 100M Firemaking, 100M Runecrafting, 150M Woodcutting, 150M Fletching, 150M Fishing, and 200M Slayer (11th) 12. Forsberg888 : 3,53B xp (+194M). I don’t even know what to say here lol.. Fors, the only guy to actually pass anyone this month manages to pass two people. He’s been on nearly 2.2B xp year, and if that wasn’t scary enough, nearly 1.9B of that was gained in the last seven months, which is nothing short of unreal. We won’t even see his true year for another five months. THIS ISN’T EVEN HIS FINAL FORM. This month Forsberg has kept up with all of his dailies, and rampaged through Ranged, Magic, and Summoning, leaving himself just enough space left in Summoning for his effigy combo. It appears as if he’s on the road to finishing up Magic really quickly, but nothing can be said as to what he’ll hop to next and for how long, as he’s got quite a lot of near 200M skills to choose from that he can achieve pretty quickly given his current pace. Coming milestones: 100M Mining, 150M Hunter, 150M Thieving, 200M Magic (8th), 200M Summoning, 200M Strength, 200M Ranged, 200M Woodcutting, 200M Fletching 13. My Kingz : 3,41B xp (+38M). The recently dethroned highest XP trimmer has been holding his own this month. Although he lost a rank to Fors this month, Kingz has been tearing through Runecrafting with well over 20M XP in the month of December (30M monthly). He also managed to get 200M Farming and Firemaking this month, and actually at the exact same time too. He’s kept up with warbands and is still slowly but surely approaching a couple more 200M skill options that he has at his disposal. Coming milestones: 100M Mining, 200M Herblore, 200M Strength, 200M Runecrafting 14. Kingduffy : 3,37B xp (+24M). Well what do you know? It appears Mr. Duffy here trained EVERY SINGLE SKILL yet again, just as he’s been doing since like the beginning of the second century. It’s like the guy trains every skill every single day or something. Although he did lose a rank to Fors, he’s had some decent gains all around, with most notably Herblore, Slayer, Construction, and Woodcutting XP gains. Expect the guy to keep on keeping on and always oxymoronically keeping everything consistent by jumbling up his skills every day. Big up to this guy for being up there on the hiscores ever since he maxed in 2007 all those years ago and still going strong. Coming milestones: 100M Fishing, 150M Melees, 200M Hitpoints woops I mean Constitution, 200M Prayer, 200M Firemaking, and 200M Smithing. 15. CrystalFarm : 3,34B xp (+32M). Everyone’s favorite video maker is on a roll with Divination this month, while still managing play on his alt (don’t look me, nobody knows it's name) and having some fun with DotA on the side as well. Nothing really new for the reigning rank 1 kiwi here, just some warband gains and chronicle Hunter XP on the sidelines. He still has a few months left before university starts again, and before that he plans to hopefully finish 200M Divination and Hunter, or at least get close. Although he seems to think he’s done for (http://puu.sh/5XWQ8) he’s still putting in the hours and maintaining his top page Divination rank, of which he passed the 100M XP milestone, and, more recently, the 120 virtual level in. Coming milestones: 100M Runecrafting, 100M Thieving, 200M Hunter Honorable Mention: Makaveli 93 – guy went fishing or something Merry Christmas everyone! :)
