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The Tale of Lokaria


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#61
Xewleer
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Heh heh.... Alex... is he really dumb, or is he just a guy with a huge amount of obfuscating stupidity.



Edit:I just had more trouble spelling stupidity (Dangit!) than I did obfuscating.
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#62
Bluejayfan94
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Heh heh.... Alex... is he really dumb, or is he just a guy with a huge amount of obfuscating stupidity.



Edit:I just had more trouble spelling stupidity (Dangit!) than I did obfuscating.




Lol, I know. I couldn't spell my name once... I mean really - MY NAME. You just have to think about it for a second lol. #-o

#63
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Heh heh.... Alex... is he really dumb, or is he just a guy with a huge amount of obfuscating stupidity.



Edit:I just had more trouble spelling stupidity (Dangit!) than I did obfuscating.




Lol, I know. I couldn't spell my name once... I mean really - MY NAME. You just have to think about it for a second lol. #-o




Probably because subconciously you were concentrating more on obfuscating than stupidity,and for that while you forgot?
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#64
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Heh heh.... Alex... is he really dumb, or is he just a guy with a huge amount of obfuscating stupidity.



Edit:I just had more trouble spelling stupidity (Dangit!) than I did obfuscating.




Lol, I know. I couldn't spell my name once... I mean really - MY NAME. You just have to think about it for a second lol. #-o




Probably because subconciously you were concentrating more on obfuscating than stupidity,and for that while you forgot?




Uhhh, surrrre. Why not - But I may have been trying to remember my locker's combination #-o

#65
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Alright! A continuation of the Guards short interludes I was writing. Basically, I'm describing the guards of the Black Master, as well as his security measures...



Old Master, as he revealed he had a legal name change to that moniker, continued the tour, until they were in front of the infirmary. Muffled screams started up suddenly, then, surprisingly ceased. They opened the door... A man was politely bowing to the nurse, an old woman around Old Master's age. He had a gigantic cast on the left half of his body.



"And don't stand in the rain, shower, or in the path of catapults... You'll be fine, here's a waiver. See you in a week!"



The man hobbled out, surprisingly, he did not limp so much to pain as the cast was removing much of his mobility. "And here's my lovely wife! The head nurse of the western infirmary! My! Doesn't she look young for eighty! Ha ha ha!" Old Master suddenly felt a [puncture] in his skin. "Argk! What did you just inject into me!"



She smiled, and pushed out a little of the liquid in her syringe. "Why the antidote to the poison I put in your waffles, dear. I was a little worried when you didn't drink your tea, which has the usual anti poison... but oh well, I was sure you could take it..." Old Master, now looking not a little bit scared waved the group onward. The final few people heard her mutter under her breath: "That'll teach him for poking fun at me."



Three bathroom breaks for Old Master later, they arrived at the PARAPETS!!! "These are the PARAPETS!!!"



"Why did you say it all capitalized like that? Isn't just parapets? Or, THE parapets?"



"Kid. Curiosity killed the cat... and it looks like your depressed. Cut the emo crap or make good on your suicide promises." Old Master was clearly delusional from whatever his wife injected into him.



"But... I'm not... Sir... that's completely wrong... I'm not emo or even considering suicide!"



"Really? It looks like someone's developing SUICIDAL TENDENCIES!" He dropped kick the student over the PARAPETS(!!!) and into the moat.



"I think you killed your best student." Said the trainee who had been pistol whipped earlier. "Hey... does that mean I'm still last?"



"Yes. But it looks better cause there are fewer of you."



A guard ran up. "What was the disturbance? Did an enemy scale the wall?" The group turned away and walked off, leaving the soldier to discover the fallen student.



"I think that's enough for today. We'll start practice for an hour or two then go into quiet contemplation on what it means to be competent." The old man folded his hands.



"Sir, but you never told us the story behind the PARAPETS (!!!)." Said the last student.



"Son. Are you emo?"



The student decided to play it safe. "Yes sir... sorry sir."



"Now then... make good on your suicide promises... or cut the emo crap." The delusional man drew out a knife from his sleeve.



"Cutting the emo crap, Sir."



"Good boy... you'll go far..."







Gags... all of it... but I regret nothing!!!
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#66
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Lol, I have never laughed at this much since Ratchet stopped writing.

#67
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I've been having account trouble. Sorry all, it seems the password I keep putting in is not working... losing work... ugh...



Chapter 6



The large cell was white and padded, it was marked "Do not disturb. Room inhabitants are level 5+ danger criminals. They kill people." The so called dangerous inhabitants were strapped to the walls, completely incapable of movement. They could talk, except that Troy and Alex, who were muzzled.



Lucrecia hung limply. She was classified as a level 5+ criminal just be her association with her brother?!? 'Not fair at all.' She mumbled to herself a little.



Dracon was placed between Troy and Christina, with Lucrecia directly across from him. She looked kind of lifeless strapped against a wall. He found himself fascinated. He eventually tore his eyes away. Christina's body tensed, she was waiting for him to talk to her.



"Christina, how are things? I haven't seen you in a long time." He felt he could talk without secreting his words. Troy would be the only other one who could hear him, and he was fast asleep, mumbling about a past battle.



"Pretty good. Well, except for the recent events... my loyal dog was captured by the Black Master's troops. I joined the rebels to free him, if you don't mind."



"Course not! But you could have asked me, you know I'd never let him rot in jail. I just didn't hear about it."



"Lucky I don't suffer from parental abandonment. It happened yesterday, then I was recruited by Alex during my homicidal rage. You know how it gets... your best friend gets captured, and maybe tortured... one things leads to another and one ale tips you over the edge and HEY!! You're wanted for genocide."



"I guess I'm lucky I don't have any reason to try to kill you. But enough with the jabs. You know I serve a master, and he needs me. Soon his plans will reach their climax. I want to be by his side. You are always welcome to join us, I'll protect you."



"Sorry. You chose security, wealth and stagnation. I chose freedom, travel and being a little strapped for cash. The plan is stupid, but I am glad you aren't going down with Roland." She smiled encouraging at him. "You are always welcome to travel the world with me."



"I wrote the book on traveling. Well, at least let me free Duncan, stay with me until then..."



"Yeah... Fine"



"Fifty years... you're what, 750, 700?"



"800. You were 200 years old. She was eighteen. Disturbing, but you looked good."



"Not so bad yourself, bet all the guys hit on you. But remember... I must approve all future heir makers before you decide to produce some kind of progeny."



"Father... sorry." She turned away from him. She didn't like to call him that. They were centuries old, they shouldn't have to talk like that to each other. He turned away. The deepest past was painful to them both.



-In another part of the maze-like prison-



Captain Tiber, the man who had captured the rebels, was extremely scared, like, completely lose control of his bowels scared. In the numerous pockets of the half-elf was a symbol of a Prime Servant of the Black Master, which, according to recent findings, ranked the same as generals, while he was concerned. "How how how screwed am I? Really really really screwed! Snap SNap SNA~a~A~ap!! Any suggestions?" No one said anything, they secretly wanted him to get busted, in fact, several of his lieutenants were compiling a very damning dossier in their spare time. "After I change my pants I'll talk to that Servant." He walked bow-legged out of the room.



-cell block 1138, interrogation room L1-



Dracon sat in front of a desk. Darkness did not bother him so much as the man in front of him was thoroughly evil and smelly. He wished he could kill him, but the chair he was tied to was bolted to the floor.



"I I I want to know what your game is! Rebellion is a capital crime and a Servant is MOST MOST MOST harshly punished... I believe it has something to do with alternating between boiling and half-frozen water... until your skin peels off."



Dracon smiled. This guy would be easier to play than a fifty cent kazoo. "Menacing... but there is a second layer to this. Sure, I'm participating in rebellion, but what say the only real fighting force capable of killing these rebels are in Lord Black Master's castle, delivering them straight to the only properly made prison in 500 miles of here. No offense to your own, but the only reason they haven't escaped yet is either their asleep, or, waiting for the time it would bring the most amusement."



"Well Well Well then, what proof do you have? This is a weighty business after all, and as long as your rebel friends don't suspect your identity it's a win-win for you, no matter what happens. Fortunately, your symbol checks out. What about the rebels? Can Can Can I kill them now?"



"No! You don't have them all, and I don't know all their allies. What if they have Vampire Lord support? Or maybe Tidal sent some of them? If you kill them, I'll lose reward for delivering fewer rebels!" Dracon stared Tiber in the eye. "The more enemies taken out the less enemies my comrades will have to fight tomorrow." Dracon could tell Tiber was now convinced. What he had said was a little known password. "Now, to prevent any suspicion from reaching me, you will send me back to the cell and announce that you will kill us all, but their is one more chance for salvation... if the next person talks. Choose the sleepy guy. He was right next to me. Interrogate him then send him back. He won't talk to you, however, don't use his sister as a threat.



"Meanwhile, I will have stolen that small penknife in your back pocket. you will make sure guards are wary , but set it up so that the weapons we own are in a nearby room. Lastly, if you value your life... stay out of our way." Tiber swallowed, he supposed himself to have no choice but to obey.



Side story: Black Master



The Black Master was bored. No heroes had come far enough into his castle to give a challenge before dying. Boring boring BOOOORING!!! The Black widow was out seducing some poor sap of a warlord (he didn't care which) and the Captain had politely asked him to stay out of the way of the renovations. Only one thing to do!



He slouched and slid off his throne. He ate a snack then moved on to the science lounge. A state of the art laboratory with everything a mad scientist could need, every compound known to science and alchemy, and all the guinea pigs (human, animal, mutant) that he could use.



"They said I was mad! But I'll show them! I'll show them who's REALLY mad!" This was Mad Molotov. Mad scientist extraordinaire. He had more degrees than the local colleges had to offer and a few that don't quite exist yet. Some people said that he was just pretending to be mad, but really, he was completely and utterly out of his mind, a few screws loose and whatever comparisons to insanity you care to mention.



"So..." The Black Master began, looking at the shivering animals who knew that they would not live out the week. "What do you have this time? I hope it's not another [bleep]ed hamster ball."



"Fool! That was a brilliant idea!"



"They couldn't move it at all! The enemy just picked them up, tossed them into a catapult and launched them at our own front lines."



"Touche... but bow in wonder of my magical mayhem mangler!"



"I told you NO MORE GIANT [bleep]ED HAMSTER BALLS!!!"



"But this one actually works! Look! He's moving around!"



"I'm considering slashing your budget, and some of your genetic monstrosities, if this doesn't work."



"Don't worry! Don't worry! I may be a LeeTTle mad, but I'm not crazy..."



"You're insane. I constantly live in fear of you blowing us all to kingdom come..."



"Alright. Alright! ... Goodbye! Fool! I will destroy him in his fragrance! No... Arrogance is so much better... yesss... I will you this new invention... Dah!! Where'd you come from!?!?"



"I never left the room!"



"...No hard feelings?"



"Whatever makes you happy, at least I know where you stand." The Black Master walked out of the room and back to his throne room. He picked up a roster of enemies and allies, as well as a land map dividing all empires into their respected areas. So close to the fruition of his plan. Dracon was a trouble magnet. Fate always hung heavy on him. He would naturally gather people around him, either rebels or allies. He could never have enough allies... but rebels. All it takes is one strong enough... then, Tidal would never have anything more than the 100 sq. mi. elvish homeland again.
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#68
Xewleer
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I'm so glad there is a lot of activity here! It makes me happy! I'm really busy, so I've not had a lot of time for anything fun. (only play videogames on the weekends now) MST is a really hard college. But I'll pass! Yes!
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I'll show you how terrifying a true Christian can be!
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Hermit of the Varrock Library and its proud guard.

#69
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I'm so glad there is a lot of activity here! It makes me happy! I'm really busy, so I've not had a lot of time for anything fun. (only play videogames on the weekends now) MST is a really hard college. But I'll pass! Yes!




Great to see you're back!!!

#70
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I'm not back... so much as I wasted time to post this. Not a bad chapter though. You can begin to see into Dracon's character.
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#71
Xewleer
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[picture of a cute rat]





Don't let this rat fool you. He is more than he seems... He is the master of seven hells and the tormentor souls. He feasts on the flesh of the damned. The Demons scream his name! What is his cursed name you ask? What name you fear to scream in the dark? What name has been described as being so horrible that it flays the mind of the hearers?



They call him...







RODNEY!!! NIBBLER OF WORLDS!!!!!









done just for a bit of fun.
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Hermit of the Varrock Library and its proud guard.

#72
Xewleer
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Side story: Black Master's dreams.



The Black Master sat at a table. It was plain, but it was designed as a table for chess. The chess board was engraved onto the top, with a placeholder for each piece at the top and bottom. There was no time-piece, but each move was made at each turn. He was losing, poorly.



Tidal, King of Nations, Supreme Elf, Emperor of the Three Continents and Supreme Warlord of Armies, giving his full title. He was tall and beautiful, all full-blood elves are. His eyes were graceful, but the Black Master could see through them. He could never make eye contact, as each time he looked, he could feel the pain of the people who had died at Tidal's hand. The Elf sat a full head taller than the Black Master; he was even taller standing.



The Black Master knew that both of them were not really there. It had taken him the first hundred nights to realize this, and stop trying to kill Tidal. Now, he just played chess and lost, every night, for 800 years. He had never one a single chess game. But he was winning the overall game. Tidal was arrogantly pursuing him, holding onto a dream of dominance. The Black Master was not pursuing dominance, and that made every difference.



"So... Checkmate. I once heard an exceedingly incompetent officer say this: 'your house of cards is falling like a stack dominoes... Checkmate' I had him killed, of course. You ever have those problems?"



"I never let people that stupid even get close to that kind of position, much less even be anything other than a town guard." He reset his pieces. "I believe we usually play two games. Again?"



"Again. Again. Again! You never get tired of this! You haven't cracked in seven hundred years! WHY DO YOU THINK YOU CAN WIN?!" Tidal was actually angry. The recent military campaign losses must be bothering him. Soon, he would only rule over his homeland.



"Because our games of chess do not matter. I know every strategy you pull. All three hundred. I'll never win, though, because, in the end, and somehow, you will pull off whatever counter to my counter, whatever strategy to my strategy, and beat me again. So I hone my skills and observe you. Why do you want me here? Same reason... but you have all the skills? No... but an immortal Elf knows more than a human... that's for sure."



Tidal stared at him in quiet surprise. THIS was new... but not really. He realized he expected this. That this was coming. That maybe, just maybe, he had underestimated the Black Master. No! No he had NOT!! The Black Master was human... no matter whose half-elf blood he drank. The Black Master could DIE. And he would. Then his empire will crumble and he, Tidal, King of Nations, would take control again. Just like every other time.



"Okay. Then let us play another round." He said, measured and calm. He knew how the Black Master acted, as well as what he could do. No surprises really. He would win, nothing to even remotely panic. Life had an end for everyone, except Vampires, and when that end came for the Black Master... He hoped he would be their to gloat.



Fifteen moves in, the Black Master moved the King, a piece he had never moved like that before. Tidal decided to ask him why.



"Because, when the grand strategy finally manifests itself. The King must not be afraid to move, when the King moves, his men will follow."



"You haven't left your castle in a hundred years! Not since I nearly killed you, again."



"Depends on who's moving the piece! The turn is yours..."









Woohoo! I introduced Tidal, King of Nations!! He'll soon be really evil... I'm thinking... a little mutilation... some torture of children... in front of their parents... vice-versa... kick a couple puppies... you know. General evil stuff. Please understand, this guy is FREAKING EVIL (in all caps!) :D
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I'll show you how terrifying a true Christian can be!
It's Xewleer: ZEW le ar, got it memorized?
Hermit of the Varrock Library and its proud guard.

#73
Bluejayfan94
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All caps you say? Evil you say? I think I am going to like him ;)

#74
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Lol, I have never laughed at this much since Ratchet stopped writing.


I don't know if that was an insult or a compliment...reword it...
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#75
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Lol, I have never laughed at this much since Ratchet stopped writing.


I don't know if that was an insult or a compliment...reword it...




It was a compliment




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