The Gaalsien & Smokeeagle Saga

[Gaalsien]

Why do you never get replies? Maybe it's because I'm the first person to post and so people assume nobody's posted another chapter.

 

 

 

Or it's because you're just not as cool as I am.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Important notice: SmokeEagle posts chapters too.

[ste_mc_efc]

very good

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

how long this gonna be?

[Gaalsien]

About as long as a piece of string. We kinda have the plot marked out but it really has limitless capabilities so as long as we can make it and not get bored.

 

 

 

The plot should pick up soon.

[Gaalsien]

"So mine brethren, what shall we do?" Guthix moaned

 

 

 

"I say we just go down there and kick his [wagon]" Zamarok roared, drawing his sword.

 

 

 

Saradomin shook his head. "You know how weak we are on the physical plane."

 

 

 

"I dost believeth that I have an ideaÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ" Guthix said, brightly. "We shall leave."

 

 

 

"We what?" asked Saradomin.

 

 

 

"We abandon the RuneScape," Guthix explained. "And we forget about them. We can forge a new plane. I have given it much thought and I hath already got a name for it: Everquest"

 

 

 

"No, I think-"

 

 

 

"Well of Souls?"

 

 

 

"Sadly, I think-"

 

 

 

"Hyrule?" Guthix offered desperately.

 

 

 

"I'm afraid that, as God's, we have a duty to see our creation through to the endÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ" said Saradomin fiercely.

 

 

 

"I'll get the pop-corn," smirked Zamarok.

 

 

 

"ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæand play an active role in stopping its terrible, fiery demise,ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâÃ

[ste_mc_efc]

gettin better i can sorta see a plot but its good

[lazy_k]

Lol this is funny! :P

[brooce]

good story wheres more?

[NinjaGriffon]

yay, fun fun

[Gaalsien]

It didn't take long for SmokeEagle to get us lost;

 

 

 

"Don't tell me we're lost?" I moaned as we marched through a forest.

 

 

 

"No, no we're not lost!" said Smoke haughtily.

 

 

 

"You just don't know where we are?"

 

 

 

"Yep. That pretty much sums it up"

 

 

 

"ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâæRightÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ"

 

 

 

How the hell had we ended up in a wood anyway? One minute Falador, the next a remote wood miles from nowhere. That didn't make sense. That wasn't even physically possible. Even a woman couldn't have that bad a sense of direction.

 

 

 

Maybe he was planning on killing me in this wood whilst I sleptÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ.

 

 

 

I contemplated stabbing him in the back and then feasting on his brains for sustenance but a) it'd hardly be a mouthful and B) it was too cold and I couldn't be bothered.

 

 

 

We continued walking for a bit until it began to snow again. We both stopped and shivered.

 

 

 

"If it's any consolation, Smoke, I'd rather be wearing that nice warm priests robe than this freezing rune armourÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ"

 

 

 

"Really?"

 

 

 

"No."

 

 

 

He scowled at me

 

 

 

"Shut up and help me light a fire"

 

 

 

"RightÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ need any help cutting down that tree?"

 

 

 

"No."

 

 

 

"OkÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ suit yourself"

 

 

 

A few moments passed,

 

 

 

"Are you laughing at me?"

 

 

 

"No, why?"

 

 

 

"I heard something sounding awfully like laughter"

 

 

 

"Must have been the windÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ"

 

 

 

"OhÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ suppose so"

 

 

 

By the time he had succeeded in chopping down the tree, one of my legs was going blue, I couldn't feel my nose and my rune armour was frosted up. Holding his prize, he turned to me and grinned. I noticed that he had several icicles forming from his goatee.

 

 

 

"Want me to light the fire?"

 

 

 

"YeahÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæyou'd better. My fingers are in danger of dropping off."

 

 

 

Now, anyone who knows me will remember that I have spent HOURS improving my fire making skill, so I promptly set around making a blazing inferno from two rocks and a glass of water.

 

 

 

SmokeEagle coughed.

 

 

 

"Yes?" I asked.

 

 

 

"All rightÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ no need to show offÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ" he grunted, settling down by the side of the fire.

 

 

 

I simply grinned and moved in closer, warming my hands from the heat.

 

 

 

"Oh, thank Zamorak" I sighed.

 

 

 

I expected SmokeEagle to spout out some religious objection but strangely he didn't reply. When I looked up, he had a strange grin on his face and it wasn't surprised this time around.

 

 

 

It was happy.

 

 

 

Astounded by this new show of emotion, I turned around saw why: a woman step into the circle of firelight.

 

 

 

I believe a large, stupid grin appeared on my face at that point.

 

 

 

She was about sixteen,ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæwell built, with a cascade of flowing dark hair silhouetted against the snowy forest. I also noted that the leather clothing she was wearing could've been made by the skinning of a single hamster. How she hadn't died of hypothermia vaguely crossed my mind.

 

 

 

"ErÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ hello" I said, standing up to greet her.

 

 

 

SmokeEagle attempted to stand up, but the huge volumes of ice that had formed on his robe made it impossible.

 

 

 

"W-w-would you, um, like to share my fire?"

 

 

 

Smiling sweetly, she took a seat in the snow infront of the fire. I sat next to Smoke and whispered to him;

 

 

 

"Cor blimey! Look at those two, huge, gleaming well oiled, nicely formedÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ"

 

 

 

"ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâæAxes?"

 

 

 

I stared at him.

 

 

 

"ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâæYeah, something like thatÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ"

 

 

 

Seeing us talking, the barbarian girl smiled again.

 

 

 

"I l-like your t-teeth," I stuttered.

 

 

 

"Thank you," she laughed, and her Voice was a choir of angels to me.

 

 

 

"SoÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ what brings you out here?" asked Smoke suspiciously.

 

 

 

"Oh, nothing much. Just killing thingsÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ" she replied.

 

 

 

I nodded understanding.

 

 

 

"Yeah, thought so" he said quietly, returning to sharpening his sword.

 

 

 

"Well, we're on some major big quest for the gods!" I blurted out stupidly, urgent to impress before these two started to talk properly.

 

 

 

"Oh really?" she replied, turning to Smoke and giggling.

 

 

 

"Oi!"

 

 

 

"What?"

 

 

 

"Were you making fun of me?"

 

 

 

"NoÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ of course not"

 

 

 

"Then what're those weird circular motions near you head?"

 

 

 

"OhÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ ermÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ swatting flies?"

 

 

 

"By the way, let me let you in on a secret" she whispered.

 

 

 

"Yeah?" I asked, edging closer

 

 

 

"Well, I can make your armour and weapons twice as strong. And I'll do it for free"

 

 

 

"Really? How?"

 

 

 

"Well, you see, you give it all to me. Then I run over there, mutter the magic words and it'll get instantly, um, twice as good.."

 

 

 

"Cool!"

 

 

 

"Call me an idiot, but I have a sneaking suspicion that she's trying to scam usÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ" said Smoke looking up from his sword.

 

 

 

"Me? Scam you?" the girl smiled sweetly, fluttering her eyelashes.

 

 

 

"Yeah! Don't be absurd!" I exclaimed.

 

 

 

"Don't tell me I didn't warn youÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ" he sighed, returning to the fire.

 

 

 

"So? Let's do it!" I shouted.

 

 

 

The barbarian just smiled.

 

 

 

--------

 

 

 

Strangely, 'over there' was by a cart and the magic words seemed to be "Let's get the hell outta here! To the village! Quick!"

 

 

 

Leaving me there, standing in the cold, staring forlornly out into the dark, empty wood, in nothing but my spotted undies.

 

 

 

"Very nice," Smoke.

 

 

 

"Shut up."

 

 

 

"I warned you? Didn't I warn you?"

 

 

 

"Shut up! She's coming back!"

 

 

 

It's quite possible I was in denial.

 

 

 

SmokeEagle laid a comiserative hand on my shoulder.

 

 

 

"Face it, man. She scammed you. Now let's get after her while the tracks are still fresh."

 

 

 

Grabbing a burning branch from the fire, he marched off into the woods. I wiped a lone, frozen tear from my cheek, and followed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ok, the next chapter's a long one so you may want to go get a drink, food, sleeping bags, etc now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Wow. This has to be the warmest robe ever."

 

 

 

"S-s-s-shut-t-t-t th-th-the h-hell up-p-p-p."

 

 

 

"In a way, it's justice. Now you can see what it's like to have something of high value stolen," he continued.

 

 

 

"D-didn't I j-just s-s-say s-shut-t th-t-the h-hell up?"

 

 

 

Following the tracks, we eventually came out of the woods, onto a sludge-filled dirt track. The trail was lost but a short way up the track began a slope, on top of which stood a village. It consisted of about twenty, crudely built huts and was patrolled by men and women in leather. Even from this distance, I could hear the sound of many drunken voices raised in song. It was quite obviously barbarian village.

 

 

 

"If thou wish to keep your kneecaps where the gods put them you should drop your weapons and turn around, slowly."

 

 

 

We turned. A barbarian had snuck up behind us and was now waving a steel dagger at us.

 

 

 

SmokeEagle looked the man's full leather armour up and down.

 

 

 

"Yeah, we're going to need your clothes," he said.

 

 

 

"Wh-what kinda weird-?"

 

 

 

"Your clothes. Take them off, please."

 

 

 

"Hey, I'm giving the orders here! You're not even armed!...oh."

 

 

 

SmokeEagle had drawn his sword from the folds of his robes. I had unearthed a small oak tree and was now wielding it as a club.

 

 

 

The barbarian looked at us with a puzzled grin on his face.

 

 

 

Smoke broke into a smile, "Toni?" he laughed, sheathing his sword, "It's been a while..."

 

 

 

Toni grinned, or he might have grinned; all I saw was a small movement of his huge beard.

 

 

 

"Smokey!" exclaimed the barbarian, "Nice to see you. Ready to pick up where we left off last time?"

 

 

 

Smoke smiled; "I seem to remember that I had you in a headlock and a knife to your throat," he chuckled.

 

 

 

Toni extended his hand, "No hard feelings, eh?"

 

 

 

"No, none at all..."

 

 

 

The barbarian folded up without a sound.

 

 

 

Smoke removed a small dagger from between the man's ribs.

 

 

 

"Bit harsh, weren't you?" I asked.

 

 

 

"Nah, he'll be ok in ten minutes," he replied "he's a tough bloke..."

 

 

 

"But still..."

 

 

 

"You need the clothes anyway"

 

 

 

"I suppose..."

 

 

 

"Get stripping him"

 

 

 

"Do I have to?"

 

 

 

"Yes."

 

 

 

"But he smells something awful!"

 

 

 

"Tough."

 

 

 

".....fine, but if anybody sees us we'll have to kill them."

 

 

 

"Agreed."

 

 

 

------

 

 

 

"How are they?" SmokeEagle asked, as we climbed the hill to Barbarian village.

 

 

 

"Other than being totally noobtacular," I said, pulling on the soft leather shirt. "They fit pretty well. I guess that guy wasn't as fat as he looked. Who was he anyway?"

 

 

 

ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¦Ã¢â¬ÅAh, just the guy who owned the barÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâÃ

[Burnt_arven]

Nice development in the story. You guy's are talented :twisted:

[ste_mc_efc]

ye its getting gr8er but how did they go from noobs to ppl fighting like that

[Gaalsien]

Well, they seem to get more talented the more they get resurected so I guess the god just keep giving them morew talent each time to make sure they don't mess up.

[Sir_Alex85]

Bump for you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I want some more, sir.

[Gaalsien]

After several days of aimless wandering, we finally reached Edgeville.

 

 

 

"That didn't take that long" said Smoke cheerfully,

 

 

 

"Yeah. You must be pretty proud of yourself."

 

 

 

He smirked at me.

 

 

 

"Stay here" I said firmly, " I just need to look in my bank account"

 

 

 

Smoke nodded solemnly, "It's not as if I can get lost in this place"

 

 

 

"Y'know, I'm pretty sure you'd manage it."

 

 

 

Walking the few feet towards the bank, I asked the teller to open my account. One question was playing on my mind.

 

 

 

"How do you get my stuff here so fast?" I enquired

 

 

 

The teller gave me a suspicious look

 

 

 

"Well. I could tell youÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ" he said, glowering over the desk

 

 

 

"OhÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâæ good"

 

 

 

"ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâæBut then I'd have to kill you," he finished.

 

 

 

"Err, never mind then"

 

 

 

Pulling open the drawer, I withdrew all the runes I had and a quiver of arrows that had cobwebs strung amongst them. I smiled grimly; the rust on these puppies could give me the edge in combat. I doubted that demons would be immune to rust poisoning.

 

 

 

Putting the runes in a small leather satchel, I slung the quiver over my shoulder and left the bank, walking over to SmokeEagle, who was looking out across the town.

 

 

 

Hearing me approach he looked up. I handed him the satchel.

 

 

 

"Thanks!" he grinned, pocketing the runes, "Where'd you get these?"

 

 

 

"Oh, I tried to learn magic a while ago. Got bored after a week though," I replied. "So. Now where?"

 

 

 

He looked up and pointed to a squat, grey stone castle, surrounded by a shallow, murky brown moat that wouldn't have stopped a determined child, and with an old, rusted drawbridge. It had been built on the very edge of the safe lands.

 

 

 

Straining my eyes, I could make out a large wooden sign hanging above the drawbridge.

 

 

 

"Grandma Smilie's Retirement Castle for the Youthful Impaired?" I read.

 

 

 

"That's our place."

 

 

 

"You're kidding, right?"

 

 

 

----------------

 

 

 

At first, as we approached the counter, it looked as though it was empty. But then, what I had taken to be a big, white wall behind it turned around and stared down at us.

 

 

 

The nurse was over seven foot tall and almost as wide, with such an impressive bust that she was almost a perfect cube. Her name tag read 'Hello, my name is HELGA'.

 

 

 

Perched ontop of this huge mountain was a head: a rather flat one, with a pair of suspicious, watery-blue eyes; a gash for a mouth filled with tombstone teeth; and a mass of butter-yellow curls on the top.

 

 

 

"Ya?"

 

 

 

Looking over at SmokeEagle, I saw that his mouth had dropped open and elbowed him. He jumped and struggled with his glove.

 

 

 

"Um...yeah....hi.......we're looking for a, um, Mr Popeye, Derek, and Colin."

 

 

 

The suspicion in Helga's eyes deepened to dangerous levels.

 

 

 

"Vie? You not be taking them on quest, yes?ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâÃ

[Radman7000BCE]

Dude. This is friggin awesome.

 

 

 

Write more!!!

[NinjaGriffon]

yes, do so, write more :)

[Gaalsien]

I'm sorry to inform you that Smokeeagle is now unable to visit forums due to the suckyness of his computer and the fastness of his broadband, which when combined, have filled his computer with viruses.

 

 

 

----------------------

 

 

 

Opening the door, we stepped into a small, torch lit stone room that contained numerous swords, shields and a huge stone table in the middle on which lay a scrabble board.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Making my way towards it, I helped Smoke sit on one of the chairs. He attempted to stem the huge amount of bleeding by consuming a pie. Realising that this wouldnÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢t work, he closed his eyes and began to chant softly.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Leaving him to his devices, I took a look around the room and saw a few faded black-and-white portraits of two young men and a sheep standing side-by-side, huge cheesy grins on their faces. At their feet lay a slain greater demon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¦Ã¢â¬ÅHello youngster,ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâÃ

[Gaalsien]

Peering into the mist, I could make out a figure staggering towards us, finally I could make out the figure of Rose, in one hand she was carrying what looked like a whole chicken and in the other the largest tankard of ale I had ever seen; it was more like the whole ale barrel.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Turning towards me, our eyes met.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¦Ã¢â¬ÅOh.ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâÃ

[SmokeEagle]

Hey there, just a quick update:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If youÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢re wondering why itÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢s taking us so long to post each new chapter, itÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢s because weÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢re currently working on another new project. And yes, it is the sequel to the Gaalsien & SmokeEagle Saga. All IÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢ll tell you right now is that its subtitle is ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¹ÃâA Tale of Two CitiesÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢. And before you start moaning I know itÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢s already a book title! I just figured itÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢d suit this story too (and I couldnÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢t be bothered to think of an original and influential title). Most of your favourites characters will return (IÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢m not sure how though) and we figured weÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢d try to write a more serious story the next time around. So if youÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢re getting impatient, just look forward to the next one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Let know what you think!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:arrow: Copy here

 

 

 

"Not one step closer, old friend" muttered Smoke, "I don't want to have to kill you. Not after all we went through."

 

 

 

:arrow:

[Romulus8604]

These are like action movies put into text.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reminds me of those R. L. Stine books. With not as much character development.

[SmokeEagle]

:arrow:

 

 

 

Erm... right-o.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Character development smaracter development, why let a tiny thing like that get in the way of a good story? ;)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And, 'Action film(s)'? I don't see the reseblance personally (apart from the few badly written fight scenes).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finally; Great. Being likened to Goosebumps... never a good thing... :(

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks for your comments all the same, though. I'm sure to put some of this new-fangled 'character development' into 'A Tale of Two Cities' or, if you're lucky, into the current series (which has about 4-5 chapters left methinks).

[Romulus8604]

Well the dialog is 'rough', that is why it reminds me of an action movie. Then again, you have to start somewhere. Keep with it. :P

[Gaalsien]

OK, so, intelligent dialogue and character development we need to work on. That's actually quite helpful, thanks.

 

 

 

No idea how the characters will develope or get smart enough for intelligent dialoue. May have to add some more characters.

[SmokeEagle]

Oh come on Gaal! I'm sure we can work something out... a magic brain boost or something?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

...nah. They're better off stupid. :D

[Gaalsien]

They go out for a piss-up and OD on wizard mind-bombs? The wizard mind-bombs, having mind-expanding properties, expand their minds?