Troacctid's RuneScape Blog

You will need:

• 1 Papyrus
  
• 1 Knife
  
• 1 Bottle of red dye

Directions

1. Use Red dye -> Papyrus

2. Use Knife -> Red papyrus

3. Sell your new Red partyhat on the Grand Exchange

4. Profit!

Next week on The Savvy 'Scaper's Guide To Becoming Fabulously Wealthy: Earn millions by drinking just half a jug of wine!

One year ago, I wrote this overview of the things that bug me about Dungeoneering. Well, it's been a year, so let's look back at the issues that annoyed me at my first impression and see how I feel about them a year later. Here we go!

[hide=Click to begin.]

Fix the price of the rewards and possibly scrap the token system altogether.

There are all kinds of reasons why it doesn't make sense. I want to say it's like Mobilizing Armies because of how slow it is without much return in between, but the truth is, MA actually has a better rewards system--with MA, once you reach the requirement to buy a reward, you generally have more than enough points to buy the item you want. Sure, you might not be able to buy all the rewards, but at least you can imbue your archer ring once you make it to 300 rank. It's good that we can bet more to get greater point rewards and then spend those points with our limited budgets. But with Dungeoneering, that whole dynamic is upside-down. When I get to level 21, I'm not excited that I can now use a bonecrusher. I'm angry/sad/annoyed/disappointed because I should be able to, but I can't.

The prices have been lowered like I wanted, which is great. There are still some that I think are way overpriced, though. The bonecrusher and herbicide are too expensive for their marginal effects; I'd like to see them reduced in price so that they can be more useful to the low/mid-level demographic to whom they're most useful. I feel similarly about Rapid Renewal--the people who would get the best use out of it can't afford the token cost. It would be nice to see a price reduction for some of the black sheep as well: Mercenary's gloves, spirit cape, law staff, nature staff, and possibly the anti-poison totem are weak enough that they could easily be reduced in price so that the few players who appreciate their niche appeal can have easier access to them.

As for the token system as a whole, the addition of resource dungeons as fixed-level rewards has placated me on that issue. More on that later (or I guess you could go back and read my original blog post about them).

Make the rewards tradable.

There's no reason for them not to be. Really, there isn't--they all have Dungeoneering requirements anyway. Why aren't they tradable? Tied to the previous point. This is part of why people are saying it feels so much more like a minigame than a skill. You don't need to make a skill product untradable if it has a level requirement to use.

After some consideration, I'd actually take the reverse stance on this issue. Keep the stuff untradable, but drop the redundant dungeoneering requirement. Seriously, why do we even need it? If you got the tokens for it, you've clearly done enough dungeoneering to earn it, so the level requirement is pointless. And there's hardly any items where it comes up at all--like, the arcane stream necklace, I guess? Is that it? I guess the Demonhorn necklace and the sneakerpeeper as well. But the vast majority of rewards are impossible to afford until you've already trained past their level requirements, so I honestly can't see the need to single out these three rewards. If people want to pay good tokens for this stuff, just let them. Yeesh.

Content that lets you utilize the skill outside of Daemonheim.

I was about to say "other dungeons," but then I realized we kind of have those already, don't we? (This might be something to release as separate future updates rather than as part of a Dungeoneering 2.0 patch.) This is another big part of why people are saying it feels more like a minigame than a skill. I'm sure there are plenty of ideas out there amongst the player base. A few off the top of my head: maybe alternate entrances to Daemonheim, maybe the ability to use special underground passages as portals for transportation (like the mine cart in the GE--which, while I have your attention, could really use a right-click option), maybe additional lower levels to existing dungeons that are too dangerous for inexperienced spelunkers, etc. There just needs to be something to keep it from being so self-contained.

Check.

The resource dungeons are an excellent solution to this issue. They feel like natural extensions of the skill and, for the most part, they're balanced fairly well. Some of them are a little underpowered (the Varrock sewer one is pretty crappy, for example), but on the whole, I'm satisfied. Again, my original blog post about them goes into more detail on the specific ones.

Having every item be new is way more confusing than it needs to be.

It's an unnecessary barrier to entry to have to learn whether Fractite is better than Argonite or which items you need to make a Prayer Potion or how much HP you heal by eating a Blue Crab or whether you have a high enough summoning level to make a pouch from the Stegomastyx bag you just picked up. Look, flavor is nice, but function has to come first--just put the level in the name like with Stealing Creation.

I stand by this complaint. I really want to see a (t#) tag appended onto the item names. Yes, it's in the examine, but examining everything is really annoying and stupid.

I know a lot of people, including myself to some extent, have successfully gotten used to the new items, but that doesn't mean the problem is fixed. This is going to hang over the head of every new player who decides to try out dungeoneering. It's still an unnecessary barrier to entry that could be easily fixed.

Gathering locations can be hard to pick out of the scenery.

This is made worse by the fact that most rooms have lots of inactive versions of hotspots that might be used for a skill--ponds that have no fish, obelisks you can't click on, etc. This should be easy to fix by adding icons to the minimap and dungeon map just as they would be in the overworld.

I still would like to see this. It's not a big issue for fishing spots and runecrafting altars and stuff like that, but some of the spots are still annoying to pick out of the scenery. Woodcutting spots especially. It's not a dealbreaker, but it would make me a lot happier with the skilling situation.

We need to be able to bind more items.

I get a level 11 pair of boots from the boss. Okay, great...except they disappear as soon as I leave the dungeon that I just completed. When we need to remake everything from scratch besides one or two weapons, it just isn't worth the trouble to make much of anything. Why not give us an extra bound item every 20 levels? That lets players gradually work their way up to eventually being able to bind a full set of weapon, shield, helm, plate, legs, boots, and gloves. Seems fair, right? Remember, the more items you can bind, the greater flexibility you have in customization--with only one, you'll take a weapon every time, but when you get more, you need to choose how to distribute your choices between the combat classes. So you get more depth, see? It's an improvement all-around.

After a year, I think I've adjusted my position here. Giving players a flat extra bind every twenty levels is too much. I don't think we need to add extra binds through the level-up system.

But I do still think that the "Primal boots are worthless" thing is a real issue. Giving players an extra bind that's restricted to a specific inventory slot such as feet, hands, or head would be an excellent quest reward or token-based reward something, and I'd definitely like to see it.

Spread rewards more evenly through the levels.

It is quite literally impossible to get any reward from the skill before level 53. Impossible. There is no reward available. What the hell? What's going on with that? And the reward you can get at that level is a gem bag, which, unless you love killing Goraks for some reason, is more or less completely useless. Add to this the way that experience scales with levels (xp comes at a snail's pace at low levels), and for the vast majority of casual players who don't get past 50 in Cooking let alone Dungeoneering, the skill offers literally nothing to the rest of the game. This is clearly not okay.

 

Solo players need to be able to get back into a dungeon if they log out or lose connection.

This is probably the way it is now because of game engine issues, so the difficulty of fixing it may seem disproportionate compared to the benefit, but trust me--it's incredibly important. This is not a little thing. If I lose connection at the end of a long dungeon and I can't go back in and come back to where I left off, I'm not going to want to log in at all. I'm going to want to shut off my computer in frustration. And if I know that I won't be able to leave a long and complex dungeon without losing my progress until I finish it completely, there's a good chance I just won't do it. The ability to pick up where you left off is vital to the solo gameplay.

The first has been handily repaired with resource dungeons, which provide tangible bonuses, and strong ones, at as low as level 10, 15, and 20. The second has been fixed as well. Well-done! I can fully retract both of these grievances. :thumbup:

The bosses need drops.

As I mentioned, these are awesome bosses even only having seen the lowest-level ones. The designs are creative, the tactics are interesting, the dynamics change with a team, etc. But there needs to be something to attract teams here in the first place. Can we get some boss drops that we can take out of Daemonheim or something? Because right now, the bosses pretty much drop nothing...maybe some backstory, maybe an item you maybe want to bind, but otherwise nothing. Why create these awesome bosses and then go and make them irrelevant to the rest of the game? Give us a reason to kill them. Maybe give them each a unique drop that we can use in Runescape proper, even if it's just cosmetic--a little ice spider egg that can hatch into a pet at the pet shop's incubator from the lady who summons ice spiders, for example, could be one of the lesser rewards, while a higher-level boss might drop things like the bonecrusher. (And if you already had one, it would presumably be tradable so you could sell it, and thus preserve the incentive to come back again later.)

I'll retract this one as well--the decreased token costs, increased xp rates, and additional rewards since the skill's original release are good enough incentives for me.

They even added a dungeoneering pet. :thumbup:

Resources deplete too quickly.

If skilling is supposed to play a relevant role in the team gameplay, the skiller needs to be able to cook enough fish and smith enough armor for the whole team. When the resources run out the way they do, it becomes very difficult. I realize that this feature probably exists to keep the xp balanced, so I imagine it could be easily replaced with a decrease in xp the more you use the resource, or something like that. Sound fair?

This probably wasn't as big a deal as I thought it was for larger dungeons, but regardless, the Ring of Kinship updates included a skiller ability to increase resource yield, and just last month apparently skilling spots were made more common, so this is definitely not a concern. :thumbup:

Most importantly, when in doubt, pump up the power level.

Guys, it's okay. It's a new skill--it's supposed to be a big part of the game. You don't need to worry about breaking anything. Make the rewards plentiful, make them powerful, and make them useful at all points in the level spectrum. It worked for Summoning, didn't it? You were too conservative with the power level at first, and it was poorly-received. When you made training easier and made everything stronger (except fishing familiars), the skill only got better. Be conservative with minigames; don't be conservative with skills. If you can do for Dungeoneering what you did for Summoning, and I know you can, it could easily become one of my favorite skills in the game.

ZOMG FROST DRAGONS. Also, more reasonably-priced chaotic weapons, Ring of Kinship class bonuses inside the dungeons, and the other resource dungeons. There's still plenty of room for new and better rewards and incentives that I hope to see trickle in over time, but the power level issue is no longer a major concern for me.

[hide=Conclusion]So, what's my final grade?

We've seen significant improvements to the skill, and I've warmed up to it a lot after a year to get used to it. There's still room for more improvement, but overall, I guess I approve.

The verdict: :thumbup: [/hide]

[/hide]

Wow, my formatting looks pretty crappy, huh? Sorry about that.

The Inferno Adze is an excellent tool for training woodcutting and firemaking

By Ignatius Vulcan, Firemaking Master

I'm here to introduce you to the Inferno Adze, a powerful tool that allows you to train both woodcutting and firemaking simultaneously.

The inferno adze can chop down trees like any normal axe, but because of its magical properties, roughly 30% of the logs you cut will instantly be incinerated, granting you firemaking experience and freeing a space in your inventory to reduce the hassle of banking! Because the inferno adze cuts at the same speed as a dragon hatchet, it's very easy to get fast experience in woodcutting while training your firemaking as well.

Additionally, the inferno adze can double as a pickaxe if, for example, you happen across a shooting star, or feel a sudden random urge to go mining. While it isn't as powerful for mining as a dragon pickaxe, it's a handy feature that's thrown in for free.

Of course, you'll need a high firemaking level in order to earn the right to wield this powerful tool, but I believe it's well worth the effort of training to level 92 and completing the "All Fired Up" minigame. You'll get faster experience, train your firemaking, and save some money on a dragon hatchet.

Only you can prevent forest fires

By Smokey the Bear

I haven't been around here much lately, have I? It's probably because I'm spending more time over at TV Tropes, which is a different place that is also cool.

If you've been missing my blog (which would be very sweet of you), you might be interested in some of the unrelated things I've been writing about over there that I could just as easily have posted here, but didn't. Well, I guess I am now, but you get the idea.

• My alliterative review of VVVVVV
  
• My review of The Count of Monte Cristo
  
• My review of Guitar Hero: World Tour
  
• My review of Portal
  
• My review of Frankenstein
  
• Uh...this thing I wrote about...stuff...well, anyway, it's untitled.

The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.

Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.

But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that'd still be keeping his feet dry in ten years' time, while a poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.

This was the Captain Samuel Vimes "Boots" theory of socioeconomic unfairness.

--Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

...

I was actually going to write a nice long article about efficiency using this Discworld quote as a handy metaphor, but then I decided not to because I didn't feel like it.

Seemed a shame to waste a great metaphor, though, so I thought maybe you guys could use your imagination and just pretend I wrote it.

I'll wait.

....

Yup, see, I wrote it after all! Pretty good, huh? I enabled the new blogging feature that lets me hide text from all the people who have nasty keylogger viruses infecting their computers, so if all you saw was a big blank space, you should probably avoid logging into PayPal for a while.

Bye!

I am the mighty demon Korg'zt! I have crushed cities and defiled temples! I will grind your bones and use them as a pizza topping! You shall rue the day you chose to approach me with your pathetic bow!

Um, excuse me, would you please move to the other side of this skeleton here?

You will perish in fire, I swear it! I merely ask that you step out from behind that small pile of bones first.

Why? Do not question the mighty Korg'zt! I shall flay the skin from your bones with a rusty chain! I shall carve out your eyeballs with a blunt spoon! I shall...hey! Stop that! Your pathetic arrows could never topple the mighty Korg'zt...ow! Cut that out!

I vow, puny human, that as soon as I overcome this ankle-height obstacle, I will...ow! Would you quit that? I'm trying to--hey!

Look, all I want is for you to come over here so that I can painfully dismember you without having to risk stubbing my toe on this skeleton. Can't you just--ow! Aaargh!

With my dying breath I curse you, ankle-height pile of bones! If only I could somehow have walked across or around you! Curse you, bones! Curse you! Cuuuurse you...

So I'm like the only editor for the FunOrb page on TV Tropes and I know I missed some tropes because I don't even play all the games. Because I am an evil person, I'm calling on my FunOrb-savvy readers to expand the trope list and, if possible, list FunOrb on the page for the trope too.

If you've never been there before, Welcome To TV Tropes, but I should probably warn you, TV Tropes Will Ruin Your Life.

Anyway, enjoy your day. :twisted:

Happy Halloween, everyone! To celebrate this spooky holiday, I pulled a zombie out of the Wilderness to respond to some of your questions about Runescape. I hope you find his answers helpful!

Dear Zombie,

I'm getting back into Runescape after about a year of inactivity. What have I missed out on while I was gone?

--Too Lazy To Read News Archives in Taverley

Dear Brains,

Braaains! Brains brains braains. Braaaains, braains! Brains brains brains brains, braaaaains.

Brains,

Zombie

Dear Zombie,

I have about 200m gp that I don't know what to do with. I've narrowed it down to herblore or prayer. Which is more useful, Turmoil or Overloads?

--Wealthy in Witchaven

Dear Brains,

Braains. Brains brains braains, brains braaains.

Braaains,

Zombie

Dear Zombie,

Which chaotic weapon should I buy? I'm only planning to get one.

--Dumbfounded in Daemonheim

Dear Brains,

Brains braaaains. Brains. Braains brains braaaaains braains. Brains.

Braaaains,

Zombie

What's wrong with this picture?

For a while now, because of its scarcity, the Amulet of Accuracy's price has been artificially inflated by price manipulators as a tool to get around Grand Exchange price limits. Unfortunately for them, Jagex has caught on, and the amulet is getting booted back down to worthless newbie trash again, as it should be.

This isn't the first time Jagex has taken action to pop anti-junk bubbles. Previously targeted items include mint cakes:

...and blood talismans:

Now, I've heard it expressed that Jagex is playing whack-a-mole on this issue, bursting bubbles without fixing the underlying problems with the Grand Exchange that are inflating them in the first place. I agree. Knocking down items like these one at a time can only be a temporary measure at best--until something is done about the trade limits, we can always expect a replacement to sprout up to fill that space in the economy.

Looking past that, though, isn't it interesting how price manipulation created a catalyst for a positive change like this one? It was a little strange how the reward from Imp Catcher could never be reobtained while something like Excalibur had an unlimited supply. What? :-s

The Amulet of Accuracy can now reclaim its proper place as the poor man's Power Amulet. So, once again, the day is saved, thanks to...price manipulators!

You are instructed to move an ability from one color to another. This ability must be something used in every set (i.e. discard, direct damage, card drawing etc.). You may not choose an ability that has already been color shifted by R&D. What ability do you shift and to what color do you shift it? Explain why you would make that shift.

Currently, mass creature destruction is a primary ability in white, and secondary in black. Blacks mass kill effects tend to be limited or conditional--Hex, Consume the Meek, Infest, Barter in Blood, and so on--while white gets the big, unconditional sweepers like Day of Judgement. I would shift whites slice of mass removal into black.

There are strong mechanical and creative reasons why black should have access to mass creature kill. For one, black is the color of death, so it shouldnt be surprising for it to kill indiscriminately--thats what should be expected from a significant burst of black mana. Black is also the color most willing to sacrifice its own creatures, and the color best-positioned to take advantage of a well-stocked graveyard through reanimation spells. For further synergy, blacks ability to attack the opponents hand allows it to cripple the foes ability to recover afterwards.

All of blacks biggest core mechanics and characteristics lend themselves well to mass creature destruction; white, on the other hand, is more conflicted. One of whites most iconic strategies is the weenie rush, and thats not usually the sort of strategy that wants to nuke the board. Day of Judgement as a white spell creates tension, forcing white in two different directions as its Ajani Goldmane and Honor of the Pure demand lots of creatures to pump while its sweepers want as few creatures as possible to maximize value. Flavor-wise, while black views its creatures as expendable, white (although it understands that some losses are acceptable) is much more likely to want to protect them.

Logically, this should leave black with simple mass destruction such as Damnation, with white restricted to spells such as Planar Cleansing that, although perhaps more thorough, require a larger mana investment.

This weekend was the Scars of Mirrodin prerelease.

It's unfortunate that I didn't have a steel dragon slayer task, because I got wrecked by them on four separate games and I sure could have used 15% bonus damage.

I didn't even get any good drops from them. All I got were blowout games where I died with no permanents. :cry:

Dear Evil Dave,

I need to train my herblore level to 65 so I can complete the "While Guthix Sleeps" quest. What should I do to level up? I am currently level 49 and I have 5m gp in my bank.

--Sleepless in Sophanem

Sleepless:

You're in luck! I'm just beginning some new experiments with a DEMONIC TRANSFORMATION POTION OF DOOM! And, as it happens, I'm looking for some EVIL volunteers to help me test it! My last few tries didn't work out quite as well as I'd hoped (they turned the drinkers into HELL-GERBILS!), but the test subjects did mention to me that they'd had enough experience with DEMONIC EXPERIMENTAL HERBLORE that they never wanted to touch it again, so I assume they must have gotten lots of levels!

--Evil Dave

Dear Evil Dave,

Okay, I'm ready to take on Jad, I think. My stats:

80 ranged

82 HP

79 defense

70 prayer

Is this enough? And what setup should I use? Any other tips?

--Fired Up in Falador

Fired Up:

I don't know much about combat, but I think your levels are high enough to BRING UPON THE FIGHT CAVES A RAIN OF HELLFIRE! I recommend that you wear full black d'hide--black is very EVIL in today's fashion. Make sure you bring plenty of DEATH and BLOOD runes so that your enemies will experience DYING AND BLEEDING or at least recognize their EVIL SYMBOLIC REPRESENTATION. You should also carry lots of Unholy Symbols as an EVIL LUCK CHARM. And remember to attack Jad with the most NEFARIOUS weapon of all: THE UNDEAD CHICKEN. Nothing will terrify him more, as everyone knows TzTok-Jad is deathly allergic to chickens!

Bad luck on your mission, Fired Up! I hope to see you in Edgeville soon with a DEADLY fire cape on your back!

--Evil Dave

Hello, welcome to the Bank of Runescape. How may I help you?

All of the money? Why certainly. Please enter your PIN.

Yes, you have to.

I'm sorry, I don't follow you. What is a "stick-up"? I'm afraid we don't have a record of any trading sticks in your account. You'll still have to enter your PIN.

Thank you. Now, first click the FIRST digit.

Now click the SECOND digit.

Time for the THIRD digit. Don't you look at me like that.

Finally, the FOURTH digit. Now, was that so hard?

Now, did you say "All the money" or "All but one of the money"?

No, we don't give people money in bags here. You'll have to take it as a stack of coins.

Alright then, here you go, here is all the money in your account. Is there anything else you would like?

Okay, so you're a robber. I'm still not following. We serve lots of thieves here. That fellow over there even has a thieving cape, see?

Yes, I can see you have a crossbow. Many of our customers bring weapons with them into the bank. You can see that nice gentleman over there with the abyssal whip. And that girl with the spear is a frequent customer, and a very nice young lady.

Alright, well, goodbye then! Have a nice day!

What a strange young man. I wonder why he seemed so frustrated.

Wow, you're only 60 combat? Lol, what a noob.

Full rune? Lol, I bet you had to work for days just to get that. Did you make that money spinning flax or killing cows? Or did you stand around in Varrock square begging for gp because you're too lazy to get it yourself? Get some decent gear. Then maybe you won't be such a pathetic noob.

Lol, you aren't even ranked in half your stats? That's just sad. You clearly suck at this game. You should just quit now. Why don't you go back to Wii Sports? Noob.

Noob.

Wow, you're 138 combat? Lol, what a nerd.

Full Bandos? Lol, I bet you think you're sooo amazing with your pixel money. Did you no-life for weeks to earn that? Or did you use a macro to kill green dragons for you because you're too lazy to play the game yourself? Get a life. Then maybe you won't be such a pathetic nerd.

Lol, you have how many skillcapes? That's just sad. You clearly play this game way too much. You should go outside sometime. Why don't you move out of your parents' basement? Nerd.

Nerd.

Behold my xp gains!

As you can see, I did a lot of herblore, and I did, as planned, Go To Extremes.

Before the weekend started, I had about 3.5k super energies that I'd bought at a pretty good price. I think it was around here:

I tried to fruitfall for the papayas once the announcement came that there would be another bonus xp weekend, and I started bringing the fruit bat on farming runs and so on. But it was taking too long, so once papayas started to crash I just bought a bunch of them around 2.2k each.

After that, I thought I'd better get some supplies for extremes, since I knew I'd definitely be getting at least 88. Unfortunately, I had difficulty buying the base potions, so I decided to just use up my stock of irits, lantadymes, and kwuarms. I made them into unfinished potions, double-checked how many seconds I'd need, and topped up on limpwurt roots, blue dragon scales, phoenix feathers, dwarf weed, and avantoe to have enough. I also made sure to decant my super sets into 3-dose versions.

The night before the bonus xp, I did a quick back-of-the-envelope calculation in Google Docs to double-check the order I should make my potions and predict how much xp I was likely to get.

I logged in at Soul Wars bank (to keep random events from disrupting my well-laid plans) on Friday and started mixing up the spec restores. Once I could make extreme attacks with Greenman's Ale, I upgraded my stock of super attacks. Same with extreme strengths. After that, I went back to spec restores. When I ran out of those, I made my super antifires, then the rest of my extreme strengths, then the rest of my extreme attacks. As you can see above, I ended up overshooting my prediction. I'll blame that partly on a slight underestimation of my potion-making speed and partly on the extreme magic potions I mixed up with the ground mud runes from my last Living Rocks task once I hit 91. Sometimes it's good to be wrong. :thumbsup:

So now I have 91 herblore. Please feel free to contact me for all your starved or nourished herblore effigy needs! :shades:

After finishing my herblore, I went and did the circus. At some point I read on the General Discussion thread that I could get bonus xp for turning in curved/long bones, so I dumped my stock of them and gained a construction level. Then I wasn't really sure what to do.

I did a bit of hunter, catching a few butterflies, then getting bored and switching to penguins, then getting bored again and switching to implings (where, in one of my trips, I caught an unprecedented 10 zombie implings in a row).

I also did some agility, which is the same thing I did on the last bonus xp weekend when I wasn't sure what to do. Running laps is sort of my default fallback training method, I guess; it's easy to jump in and out of.

I thought I'd train magic a little, so I cast some superheats. I didn't have a lot of iron banked, so I ran out pretty quickly and had to mine more, which was okay because mining xp is good too, and I could superheat while I mined it without slowing down much anyway. But then I caved and bought some more. Pretty soon I got tired of moving my mouse down to hit the last few iron that are below the position of the superheat spell in my spellbook, so I filled those slots with coal instead and just made 3 steel and 18 iron bars per inventory. And you can see I gained a magic level and (almost) a smithing level. :-)

I trained my thieving towards the end with a little bit of blackjacking and pickpocketing, but not much.

I did eventually hit the ten-hour mark and went off to use up my charms. I used up all my blues and crimsons (including one embarrassing inventory where I accidentally made obsidian golems instead of lava titans, whoops :oops: ), but I ran out of bananas halfway through my greens and I neglected to buy swamp toads for my golds. It was pretty late at this point and it didn't look like I'd make it to 87 anyway, so I called it a night and went to brush my teeth.

All in all, I think I'd call it a successful BXPW.

In other news, check out my new outfit!

That's my approximation of the Red Wizard from Final Fantasy, which I recently started playing. Well, the GBA remake, anyway. I'm almost at the end; my party looks like this right now:

I also tried out a Black Mage outfit. I think I like the Red Wizard better, though.

I've posted a suggestion in the suggestions forum. Everyone go check it out. :thumbsup:

Link

That's right, as Billy Joel puts it, I'll be going to extremes this weekend when I raise my herblore level so that I can make Extreme Attack and Strength potions! :thumbsup:

I may or may not lie awake night after night, but I'm certainly ready to fight with some improved attack and strength boosts, and although I'm not entirely sure how much more I've got after breaking the piggy bank to pay for those ingredients, I'm pretty sure I will indeed have set myself up for a few kills. :shades:

But yeah, that's pretty much the extent of my plans for BXPW. First thing tomorrow I'll be making potions until I run out of potions to make. Then I'll do the circus. After that, I don't know. I might just do some slayer. I'm closing in on my 100th task. Obviously I'll be using up my stock of charms towards the end as well.

Also, I should splice some herblore training footage into that video sometime.

Hey, so, I was thinking of getting a skillcape. I always feel like such a noob when I put together my outfits and all I have is a dinky Wilderness team cape or something lame like that. I need a cape that's actually cool. Besides, it'll be nice to get a skill to 99. The sort of thing I can show off to my friends, y'know?

What skill should I go for?

I think a fast skill would be pretty good. Maybe cooking or fletching or firemaking. Possibly thieving. I figure since it's my first skillcape, I should start with something easy, right? So something fast seems like a good bet.

But then again, none of those are very useful. I'd like to have something to show for all those hours of work. What's the point of training for over a hundred hours and not getting richer out of the deal, right?

I'm leaning towards hunter. It's pretty fast, it makes great profit, and that cape has some pretty snazzy earth tones going for it. Chinchompas are a pretty good training method, right?

Oh please, don't train hunter.

Have you considered how it feels when you're the one deceived into investigating what looks like a perfectly harmless and interesting box (which as far as we know might contain a nice spicy piece of meat this time) and then suddenly being trapped in an enclosed space, struggling just to breathe, battering against the walls in confusion? How would you feel if some giant stuffed you into his smelly, poorly-ventilated little bag along with hundreds of other innocent people, all of them petrified with terror and panic?

Please, don't do it. It's bad enough that you're kidnapping us, but bringing us to a slave market where we'll be sold off to be forced into the short life of a suicide bomber? We have families, you know. I have two kids of my own. Would you take me away and orphan them? Would you capture and enslave my children instead? Have mercy, sir!

At the very least, I beg of you, have the compassion not to stuff thousands of us into a cramped little backpack. It's not just cruel and unsanitary--it's unsafe. We explode! You have no idea how many innocent chinchompa lives have been lost when some bungling adventurer decided it might be a good idea to bring a bag full of them onto an agility course for some somersaults.

Why don't you train your woodcutting? Lumberjacking, now that's good honest work. Clear some of that ivy that's been creeping up your walls. Or how about crafting? Everybody loves dragonhide armor, right? And you get to spend your time with all those shiny gemstones. Just please, not hunter.

We chinchompas are a peaceful race. We never wanted to hurt anyone. It's not in our nature to be aggressive, and we have nothing against mummies, nechryaels, or monkeys of any kind. After all, it's hard to win a fight when a mere scratch is enough to cause your body to explode. What have we ever done to you? We don't deserve this kind of cruel treatment! In the name of all the is good in this world, don't train your hunter skill to 99! Your conscience will...oh hey, what's in that box over there? It's a little mechanism. I wonder what happens if I--

Right. I have another beef with fishing. Uh...I guess it may be a bit more superficial than the last one, but, well...anyway...

You know how if you have high enough agility, you have a chance of harpooning double fish?

How the hell does that work?

Look, here's what you're doing:

Stabbing at the water, right? So...like...um...huh?

"Hey, looks like I stabbed through two sharks instead of one! Sweet!" :-o

I find that implausible and yet...really cool.

But it gets worse. See, what if what you're doing is this:

Now how does it work?

"Whew, I finally wrestled that shark out of the water! What a workout! Hey, wait a minute, what's that? Holy [cabbage]! There was another shark, inside my shark! Wow! No wonder it put up such a fight!"

Or is it more like,

"Hey guys, check out this piece of awesome: I'm so badass, I can wrestle...GRAAAH! Two sharks out of the water, one with each arm! Booyah! I am the noodling champion!" :-w

Actually, now that I think about it, my character is hella badass. :ohnoes:

Wtf my lightbulb is broken what do I do

Hey can you tell me where I can get a new lightbulb?

Need lightbulb

Need lightbulb

Need lightbulb

Need lightbulb

Ty

Where do I change lightbulb?

Where's that?

I don't know where that is.

What map?

How do I use the map

Oh ok ty

Omg I need a quest?

Where do I start quest to change lightbulb?

Hello?

How do I change the lightbulb?

Someone help me change lightbulb plz?

Need help changing lightbulb

Need help changing lightbulb

Need help changing lightbulb

Need help changing lightbulb

Need help changing lightbulb

Need help changing lightbulb

Come on somebody

Need help changing lightbulb

Need help changing lightbulb

Omg this is stupid I give up

Fishing Floccinaucinihilipilification, Part 2: Woodcutting Floccinaucinihilipilification

Or: Floccinaucinihilipilification without Alliteration

Yesterday I ranted a little about how fishing is overrated for money. (See previous entry here.)

Here is where I take all of that and extend it to woodcutting.

Really, I could just copy and paste the whole thing and replace all the fishing references with woodcutting references, and it would still be totally accurate. As far as I'm concerned, fishing and woodcutting are two iterations of the same skill. They're pretty much exactly the same, except one of them is faster xp and the other is wet. When I got 99 woodcutting, it was basically my way of getting 99 fishing a second time. (Or a third time, depending on how you look at it, since I have enough xp for three 99's between the two skills.) Hey, what can I say, I just like training fishing.

Look, obviously I like the skills as much as the next guy, but I was never under any illusions--they're not good skills for money. And this is even more true for woodcutting than for fishing.

At least with fishing, you need to think a little bit to come up with a superior moneymaker. If you're a newbie, you might not be able to name a way of making 250k gp/hr off the top of your head. But woodcutting...I don't even need to try. You can't throw a stone in Runescape without hitting something that's more profitable than yew logs, the go-to "money tree."

Picking flax. Spinning flax. Mining essence. Collecting snape grass. Collecting blue dragon scales. Mining iron. Mining clay. Doing slayer tasks. Telegrabbing Zammy wines. Killing dragons of any kind. Killing giants of any kind. Killing chickens. All better than yews. Anyone can do this crap, so why are yews supposedly such a great way to make money?

Okay, you can go to teaks or magics or eucalyptus and make more money, but not much. Magic logs are the fastest money in the skill and they top out around 150k gp/hr, which barely beats flax-picking at the best of times.

Don't even get me started on maple trees.

GAH WHY DO PEOPLE EVEN CONSIDER CHOPPING THESE THEY'RE TOTALLY WORTHLESS IN EVERY WAY AND IT'S COMPLETELY OBVIOUS EVEN IF YOU ONLY TEST FOR LIKE FIVE MINUTES. (Now, see, THAT'S floccinaucinihilipilification.)

My theory for both these skills is that people look at them and their minds go: no money in + positive money out = $$$. And then I guess they just don't bother to go the next step and say, "Wait, wouldn't I make more profit doing X?" I dunno, that's the best explanation I can come up with. I know that some people legitimately like the activity, which is great, but there are thousands of other people who do it because they think it'll make them rich. And that's just inaccurate.

Well, that's my public service message: woodcutting and fishing are not good moneymakers. They're slow and terrible moneymakers. If you train them, you should not be doing it for the money.

floc·ci·nau·ci·ni·hil·i·pil·i·fi·ca·tion

   /ˌflɒksəˌnɔsəˌnaɪhɪləˌpɪləfɪˈkeɪʃən/ [flok-suh-naw-suh-nahy-hil-uh-pil-uh-fi-key-shuhn]

noun. The act of estimating something to be worthless.

There are things about the fishing skill that I like a lot. It's no accident that I have more than 20m xp in the skill and spend most of my time in Runescape hanging out in a fishing-based clan chat. It's very low-key and relaxed, probably more so than any other skill in the game (except maybe woodcutting, which...well, I'll get to that). In its own little way, it's enjoyable to train. Besides that, as a staple profession in adventuring games (even in some games where it probably doesn't belong...*coughSonicAdventurecoughZeldacoughcough*) and it adds to the flavor of the universe for players to be able to make use of the natural food resources in the water--although we'll skim past some of the stranger aspects of that flavor for the purposes of this floccinaucinihilipilification.

Unfortunately, many players' perception of fishing is...shall we say...out of line.

Fishing has this reputation as a moneymaking skill. People think, "Oh, I need some money. I'll go fish some lobsters." Or maybe somebody will ask, "What's a good way for me to make money?" and someone will answer, "Try training your skills. Skills like hunter, runecrafting, woodcutting, fishing, and so on are good for increasing your cashpile." Or maybe someone is considering training a skill to 99 and a friend recommends, "Fishing is a pretty good one to go for. You earn like 50m from it." I hang around in plenty of help forums and I talk to my share of fishermen in-game, and it astonishes me how much I hear this sort of thing.

Guys, it's not. Fishing is not a moneymaking skill. It just isn't. It never makes good profit. Not even at 99. It maxes around, what, 200-300k gp/hr? After hundreds of hours of training to get to 99? That's not a good moneymaker. If that's your best way of making money, you are poor.

Seriously. People need to stop talking about fishing like it's somehow a money skill. It just isn't.

I mean, how often do you hear people saying, "I need some money right now, so I'm training my cooking"? But cooking is a better moneymaker than fishing. Adding toppings to pizza is faster cash than fishing rocktails, even at 99 fishing, and all you need is a flat 60-something cooking. Did you know I made more money getting 99 cooking than I made from 99 fishing and woodcutting combined? It's true. Hell, compared to some methods that are actually fast, cooking still isn't a good moneymaker, but it's better than fishing. Yet which skill has a reputation as a steady profit machine and which has a reputation as break-even at best?

"Oh, but what about free players? They don't have all the fancy P2P moneymakers to compete with fishing, so fishing is still fine if you're not a member!" Sure, it's a defensible option since there are comparatively few sources of profit in F2P, but it's still mediocre at best and most players can do better. I mean, in the best case scenario, you're still only looking at marginally faster profits than mining rune essence. And that's in the best case, with a high fishing level. And of course, that's to say nothing of the profits you could get at the Runecrafting Guild or mining runite or, hell, even making pizzas again. You can still do that in F2P. If you don't have a high fishing level? Well, at that point you might just as well pick the bananas and sell those instead. Totally serious here--compare the prices. Can you catch lobsters faster than you can pick bananas?

It all boils down to not a money skill. You can train it all you want (low-input, relaxing, blah blah blah) if that's what floats your boat...

...but treating it as if it's a decent source of income is a good way to stay poor.

Now, woodcutting. Woodcutting is even worse. In fact, I'm going to go ahead and make this a two-parter. Come back tomorrow and we'll get to woodcutting.

(Okay, it's tomorrow now. Click here for part 2.)

Common response to bonus xp weekend:

My response:

Not just because I'm an avid herb farmer. A lot of people don't think about how important it is that prices rise in a period of increased demand. If you think it's hard to buy herbs now, imagine how hard it would be if the price couldn't go up along with the rising quantity demanded.

Law of supply, people. :thumbsup:

Also, if you didn't figure it out already, it would be a good idea to farm your butt off for a few weeks, because herbs are not likely to get any less profitable anytime soon.

Like many of my fellow citizens, I am a dedicated follower of Saradomin, the god of justice and wisdom. I know that many of my fellow Saradominists are in an uproar over the chaos monks' plans to erect a shrine to Zamorak in north Varrock, near the site of the devastating zombie invasion that claimed so many lives, but I simply cannot understand their outrage.

Our city has a proud tradition of religious tolerance. The outcry is based on the disgusting stereotype that all Zamorakians are evil. Friends, I understand that we all have strong feelings about the attack, but not all followers of chaos are necromancer lords bent on destroying and enslaving us all. This is a group of peaceful monks who happen to follow an evil god, not some deranged necromancy cult. To abandon our principles merely out of fear is a victory for those same necromancer lords!

Besides, the offending altar is hardly a full temple--it's merely a modest shrine with a small chaos altar. And are we forgetting that there is already a Zamorakian church only a few blocks away?

These people are citizens of Varrock just like you and me, and they have all the rights that entails. We need to respect those rights.

Yes, please, do not alarm yourselves. We are merely a peaceful group of religious pilgrims wishing to enact a shrine to the glorious Lord of Chaos who shall one day rise up and feast in your slaughter. There are no unholy diagrams concealed under the floors, and certainly no plans to use them to perform any ancient rituals to summon K'resh, Devourer of Life to unleash upon your unsuspecting city a torment so horrible that you will beg for death even before it begins.

Were we truly bent on taking over your disgusting town, we would find it deliciously ironic that it would be your own pathetic moral code that would have heralded your destruction, but I assure you that we have no such intentions because we are honest citizens who merely wish to honor Zamorak, who we certainly do not believe is better than your god, or that he would kick your god's butt in a fight if your god weren't such a safer n00b.

I laugh at your puny opposition. That's what I would say if I were evil, but since I am not evil, I am not saying it.