Ginger_Warrior

Perhaps I was too harsh. I don't think "grow a pair" is appropriate advice for all people simply wanting a girlfriend. There may be other obstacles in the way which require different plans to overcome. The person in question may, in fact, be really confident and outgoing but simply not have a clue otherwise. You shouldn't tell someone advice that plainly either. "You'll never know unless you ask" would be far more effective, even if it's more or less the same point being made. If it was 'real life' you'd be more able to judge from body language and intuition how aggressive you should be in order to make the point as effective as possible. All niceties aside though, it's pretty well established that gradual exposure to fearful situations is the best way of overcoming that fear. Which is why the point, however blunt or otherwise it sounds, still needs to be made. We can coach people on here 'til the cows come home, they'll still need to do it for themselves in the end. This is not the way to think about this. They came for help. That's not our responsibility to begin with. Sure, people would be better off taking this advice, but if we want to help them we have to work with their irrational behaviour. This would sound very good in a Powerpoint presentation, but how does this work when you try apply it to practice? [/hide]Like this: That's not addressing the same problem. That's somebody asking for a 'hook' to start a conversation on, not whether they should make the first move. It goes back to what people were saying about wanting affirmation rather than advice. It's not ours to give.

I'm not sure you can really generalise my default educational style from one very specific scenario with very specific advice. People who lambast other people's style without offering alternatives are equally unproductive, if not more so, and almost definitely more annoying for it.

This is not the way to think about this. They came for help. That's not our responsibility to begin with. Sure, people would be better off taking this advice, but if we want to help them we have to work with their irrational behaviour. This would sound very good in a Powerpoint presentation, but how does this work when you try apply it to practice? Surely we both agree that, if your original position is correct, there isn't much room for maneuver if the other person can't see the wisdom. All you can do is explain why you feel that advice is best, and ask if there's a good reason the other person feels otherwise. Sometimes, there will be good reasons why. But if that reason is because they basically don't have the balls go do it, then the advice is "grow a pair", not "Well... OK then. Wallowing in self-pity is clearly advantageous in the long-term". Most proverbs have another proverb which directly contradicts them, but is this really the case for 'Nothing ventured, nothing gained'? @TTanT: I think that's half of what I meant by growing up and becoming more confident. To be blunt, in practical terms, I don't have enough time to think through every case of human contact I have these days. I'm on a busy course, I work outside of that course and I'm also involved in societies at the university. What limited spare time I have I spend gaming/keeping in touch with family back home/TIFing. Added to that I know generally that more people 'like' me as a person than not, which makes it a bit easier to stay calm in situations where younger GW might have been more frazzled, because I was more self-conscious and not keeping myself busy enough.

Just the way you discounted everything else, you have no real quantity or quality of information about the guy, his skills or what he even wants to do in life, and came up with 'military' as the answer, as if the monitor in front of you were some kind of scrying orb which provides omniscient insight into people you've shared only a few sentences with over the Internet. I think most people would be cynical about that. At least I hope they would. Perhaps "talk to a careers adviser about what the military may offer you" would have been better.

Does the video explain why they can't find this amount of money through private equity? Does it say they've even tried? (Genuinely, I've not watched it)

...We are older than a lot of people here, though. I'm 22, for instance, not 16-19. Isn't that part of growing up; becoming more comfortable with your own identity and how you present that with more confidence to other people? It's very easy for us to say, "Be yourself, and if they don't like you, stuff 'em, because plenty of other people do/will do in the future, and it's pointless going through life trying to be liked by everyone." Even if that's right, it's not so hard to see why others can't appreciate it.

That post was actually in counter to a previous post which went half way to recommending abortion, something I'd never tell someone unless it was medically necessary for them to do so. I think for people to make good choices, they should be well informed of all options available and the consequences of those options, in an impartial manner. I don't "promote" abortion (although I do promote women's rights). I promote a person's right to be knowledgeable about the decisions he or she may face. In any case, it's not actually his decision. It's his girlfriend's.

Your advice seems rather specific, given you don't even know how well he'd perform in a military role. So he's screwed up, got no opportunities... only thing he's good for is front line infantry right? I think that attitude died about a dozen years ago, at least.

I'm unsure how the above advice fails to help someone be informed of their position. It might not help the position, but you at least have to recognise it first. Girls, jobs, opportunities... they don't just land on your lap because you're rich/good looking/talented/lucky. You have to go and get them. I'm also an advocate of "man up", the only difference is I usually say it in a more sensitive and less personal way.

$1m USD? Heheh... that tickled.

Mendalhall should be back for the Steelers, that might prove crucial, as he was for the whole of last season. I'd still go for a slight Eagles win. EDIT (07/Oct/2012): THANK YOU SHAUN SUISHAM!!!

My first paid job was working as a care assistant. As far as first jobs go, it was honestly very satisfying work which inspired me to go to university and train as a nurse. It wasn't well paid, though; barely above minimum wage. Re: The pregnancy. I think abortion is an option your girlfriend should be aware of, and if that's what she wanted because neither of you have the financial capacity to look after a baby, then it's a choice she should be supported in, because in my experience, it's not something any woman finds "easy" and definitely not something a woman feels "nice" about. I wouldn't necessarily advise it though: it's her choice, and if she didn't want to have one, then we should all respect that. I shouldn't need to lecture you on safe sex either, if the pregnancy was unwanted/unexpected, should I? ;) There's more than enough services out there.

Steelers will see to that next week, don't worry! (I don't think they will to be honest... that team's faarr too beaten up... but here's to hoping)

I actually have a copy of B&W, as it happens. I can't remember if it's 1 or 2, but I took it with me to university. Not sure if it would work on Windows 7... Cracking game though.

Sumpta! You posted on the relationship sticky all those years ago, right? Oh... your signature... the glass thread... haha.

I'm starting to go down with Freshers Flu, our next door flat have all got it too. It's been there for about five days but it's starting to really come on now. It's been a good week though.

I think the point of communication, most times, is to be unambiguous. She's clearly [bleep]ing up plenty on that level.

Yeah, the strategy worked decently well with the augment that gives an extra 10% scrap. I wasn't left wanting for weaponry when I got to the flagship, for my first attempt at taking it down. I didn't read any strategy guides before taking it on though, preferring the challenge. First phase is easy, just missile the shields, use lasers when shields are down for extra damage, cloak the missiles. Didn't work the second phase because of the defence drone, and he raped me with the attack drone special. I had two Rocks in the teleport room... I don't know why I didn't think of just beaming them onto the missile weapon room and then cloaking the drone special.

Or even if they don't. Let's face it, with the average age of people who use TIF, they're not likely to be in relationships where money gets shared between both spouses. Most people on TIF aren't old enough for that (although they no doubt think they are--teenage dreams and all).

You mean the ramen noodles that taste awful because they're tasteless and sloshy? I know them too well. To be honest, I still eat them even though there's no financial need to; I use them instead of using normal noodles for a chicken stir fry, for instance. Just add a cube of chicken stock to the boiling water... makes the sauce much thicker and only adds a fraction to the meal. More frugality. I've known people eat the "toast sandwich" too. It's literally too slices of bread around a slice of toast that's been buttered both ways, seasonsed with salt and pepper. Costs like 12p to make and it tastes not that bad apparently... but I've never been that desperate! I think what we're discovering is that, actually, for different people, depending on their backgrounds, frugality means completely different things. There's absolutely no way you could go back to my hometown and say "Want to save money? Just spend a few thousand pounds on some solar panels." People where I live don't have that much in the first place.

My god... I bought a new laptop today, knew about this thread, bought it to see what all the hype's about and... it's incredible. I just wasted the past three hours of my life on this. I've not managed to complete the game on easy yet. I'm trying to get ion weapons and fire beam early on so I can disable their shields, go after their O2 and basically suffocate them to death. I think I'm getting more scraps that way, plus weapons I can either use or sell for more. It was going well 'til I came across a cruiser in an asteroid field in, I think, Sector 6. He had three shields and I didn't have the firepower to knock out his weapons room. So... off to Tesco to get food... go back home and try again. :^_^:

When I was on the doll and still not getting enough money to make ends meet, I would go straight from my Jobseeker's appointment, where they would monitor how much I'd tried looking for work in the past two weeks, and I'd go straight to CeX which is basically a pre-owned media store. I could get CDs in there for about £2, £3, perhaps £5 at most. I already had an iPod from my time at college when I had more money, so I used to come home, rip all those CDs and put them straight on my iPod, but even if I hadn't had one, I could have used a cheap MP3 player for the same purpose. I think listening to music is very important to my mental wellbeing (we all have things which keep us 'sane', maybe a form of escapism), and being jobless at the time, I wasn't exactly feeling great about my circumstances or the immediate future ahead of me, so it was a very cheap way of getting through some very hard times. In past threads on Internet piracy, I've vehemently argued against people who say "I'm jobless/poor/a student so I have to get my music free." That's why.

Because people would farm the Exp if they made trainers that high. I'm not saying Exp Farming is bad--that's a seperate argument, which if you want to have, then fine--but Nintendo's agenda is pretty obvious in the randomness that stats are given to Pokemon. No real way of controlling IVs, which point-for-point are more significant than EVs etc. I think with it being an RPG-ish adventure, it's quite easy to set your own challenges. Like, don't evolve your Pokemon, or don't use moves with power >= 70. There was one guy I remember who played through Blue/Red with all sorts of crazy challenges, like not using PokeCentres or Pokemarts, treat "KO" as "dead and never to return". Just like you did for Summoning in RuneScape, it's even easier to do in Pokemon because, unlike RS, there's just so many weapons to pick from, namely the Pokemon themselves.

I think a lot of the criticism of Gen 4 and 5 is over the top and fairly undeserved, and it makes me cringe, as someone who did play Red and Blue, to see people on YouTube trashtalking Diamond/Pearl and Black/White, or anyone that hasn't played the first two Gens. A common complaint is the lack of originality in Pokemon design. "A chandalier for a Pokemon WTF?" they cry, but then I counter that with Muk, Magneton, Electrode and Geodude. Furthermore, said chandalier is a part-Ghost type, so ghosts taking possession of inanimate objects... yep, sounds like a common theme alongside a lot of other games/movies/books to be honest. A living rock? Hmm... I'm not so sure. Another criticism is that they're too easy. To them, I say they can only make that statement after finishing off the Battle Subway. I haven't, so I won't claim the game is easy at all. What I will claim is that the main storyline is accessible to players of all skill levels (including they who must not be named--children), but the game itself has features that test those even at the top. Further still, I think designing a game which can be played by such a large group of people with such varying differences in skill level is an incredibly hard task, and one that Nintendo and GameFreak does pretty well, all things considered.

By 24 hours, wouldn't it have gotten close to "passing"? If the person in question is in a dense crowd, how accurate is it then?