Okay, I realize there's maybe a lot you don't know about relationships and girls in general, but c'mon, at the least you should realize that writing some mopey suicidal song isn't going to get girls to go 'Oh hey look he's a really cool guy, and is in touch with his emotions!'. It'll get them to say 'Wow look at this pathetic thing, this guys an emotional wreck.' I'm not saying this to attack you or anything, just you really need to change the way you approach this if you actually want a girl. The sort of stuff you're doing is just going to leave you alone.