p0nd3r4 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each. Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get onto the next house. Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are not talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second - 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a pokey 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that flying reindeer can pull 10 times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them -Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch). A mass of nearly 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reaches the fifth house on his trip. Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim considering all the high calorie snacks he must have consumed over the years) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering pink pulp.. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now. MERRY CHISTMAS!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anonimu Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 I saw this once on a website... But let's assume that Santa can control all the dimensions, including the 0.5th dimension, time, then he could easily teleport gifts all over the world in exactly 0 hours, 0 minutes, and 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 seconds... Losers...Are you blind or ignoring me on purpose?Even though I sometimes side with religious people in some debates, I no longer consider myself religious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocketman089 Posted December 25, 2005 Share Posted December 25, 2005 Party Pooper :? Gamertag: King Arizona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now. MERRY CHISTMAS!!! BUt santa is magic especially when he is travelling so it doesn't go by the normal rules. Explain now please! Merry Christmas :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vladmoney Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 1 word: clones Visit my DeviantArt Page at http://vladmoney.deviantart.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Antrune Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 Thats quite an indepth analysis there. Thanks :P Favourite part are the raindeer heating up like a space shuttle coming into re-entry. And no lol why do you always want to get stuff from John Lewis. Its over ̣̉300 more then than what i paid. John Lewis is a great, great shop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Escape5 Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 Wow you had a lot of time to figure that out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indy500fan Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 it just wouldnt be christmas with out one these "explanations". im actually suprised it took this long. digg and fark both already had a few. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
runesmithie Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 it just wouldnt be christmas with out one these "explanations". im actually suprised it took this long. digg and fark both already had a few. This isn't exactly a news site you know ;) I just posted something! ^_^ to the terrorist...er... kirbybeam. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indy500fan Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 This isn't exactly a news site you know ;) well fark is just loosley based on "news" anyways :lol: and this isnt news at all, i remember getting this in emails back in 97. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
p0nd3r4 Posted December 26, 2005 Author Share Posted December 26, 2005 Oh I know this is old but I knew that not everyone would've seen it... I thought it was funny as f anyway. ^^ I had visions, whilst reading that, of a scientist like the hostage ones from half-life explaining all of that to a small child in a matter-of-fact way :P Heh.. hehe... hehehhahahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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