Iamdan

Her 'chance to make up for it' is going out with you. Use it if you want, I'm just saying it sounds pretty needy to me and much better ways have been suggested.

I don't like it. It's basically saying she's doing you a favor by going out with you. Even if it is the case, don't let her think that.

Definitely. We also enjoy beer.

What's a piecost? 'Bout $3.50 AHHHHH I WANTED TO DO IT!!!11111 :-( Um... My room smells like updog. My mate nearly got into 2 fights today and yesterday. First was when his mum was driving us to a pub and there was construction on the highway so everyone was going slow. There was a car packed with 28ish year olds and one wolf whistled at his mum. He jumps out and runs in front of their car yelling at them. He's big with crazy hair and beard and piercings and tats etc, so I can imagine how scared they would have been. He punched a dent in their bonnet, came back in the car and his mum was like... thanks.

I dunno, halfway I noticed that the author words were full of disdain and hate that it started to sound like an essay of "Why I hate Smart People" rather than advice. It gives a feeling of hate and scorn, also half of this advie is faulty. I know plenty of AP students who have a sucesful relation. In fact the longest relationship I know is an AP student, 5 years I believe. The guy who wrote it is a smart guy himself. Being in a 5 year relationship means he's successful with woman, not women.

I almost ran over a piecost on my way home from work.

You've been reading up on wiki or something? Nah I just think for hours at a time sometimes - today I was thinking about saw and my train of thought lead me to our survival instinct and how social normalities are discarded if we are scared for our lives. I did some research and skimmed through a part autobiography on survival which mentioned katrina (and witness stories) briefly. The usmc ka bar looks like a good knife to get.

Today I found out that after hurricane katrina, it was less than 3 days before armed gangs looted neighborhood after neighborhood and police were shooting people on sight after curfew. By the time the government organizes itself for a rescue after a disaster, most of those injured will already be dead and looters will be killing and ransacking so they can survive. It could be less than 3 days between now and chaos. I've decided to start learning how to take care of myself without relying on technology. I signed up for a senior first aid course, decided to work on my fitness more, will go camping more often, started looking at knives etc.

pics

I don't know how I got home last night but it would have been a reeeaaalllyy bad idea if I drove

Found this, thought you guys might find it interesting. [hide]The Ten Reasons Why HIGHLY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women... AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT... I've been teaching men how to become more successful with women and dating for a several years now... and one "problem scenario" just keeps coming up OVER AND OVER... and OVER and OVER and OVER again... ...and it's really amazes me. I'm going to refer to it as "The Genius Failure Paradox". "The Genius Failure Paradox" is the tendency for UNUSUALLY intelligent men to have very LOW levels of success with women and dating. After contemplating this particular paradox, discussing it, and working on it for an awesome amount of time, I'd like to share my thoughts about it with you. I assume that if you've read this far, then you see probably yourself as smarter than the average guy. You know that you're a little different than other guys. You probably realized at a young age that you saw things differently, and thought differently than others in school... And you've probably realized that your smart mind gives you an advantage over others in many areas of life... Your smart mind gives you a particular type of advantage that can be very, very powerful in life: YOU'RE USUALLY RIGHT. Smart people get used to being "right", because they usually ARE right. And when you're RIGHT more often than others, you can get ahead in many situations. But unfortunately, this smart mind of yours can actually be WORSE than USELESS when it comes to a key area of life: WOMEN AND DATING. By the way, I did say WORSE than useless. It can actually be like having a hammer when you need to tighten a bolt. If you use the tool you have for the job, you'll most likely make the situation WORSE. Of course, it's hard for a smart guy to even IMAGINE a situation where his smart mind could HURT his chances for success... But trust me, this is one of those situations. So relax, open your smart mind, and let me share with you the ten reasons why smart guys fail with women... and what to do about it. REASON #1: THEY'RE WRONG, BUT THEY CAN'T OR WON'T SEE IT OR ADMIT IT I mentioned that smart guys are used to being RIGHT in most situations. And what do most smart guys do when they come across a situation where they're WRONG? They find a new situation... one that fits their strength. They know they'll be right next time, so they just walk away... knowing that it won't be long before they're right again. (OR they let the "problem situation" destroy them... more on that later.) Well, the [bleep] about being wrong when it comes to women and dating is THERE'S NOWHERE TO RUN AND HIDE. There's no quick "I'm right" around the next corner to make you feel better. It only takes "failing" with a few women in a row for a smart guy to see the pattern... and realize that something isn't working. Solution? Think harder. A smart guy just assumes that his logic must be good... so he just keeps thinking harder. But when no success comes, it really starts to become mentally difficult. Accepting that you're wrong is a VERY hard thing for a "smart guy". Accepting that you're not only wrong, but you have NO CLUE WHERE TO EVEN START is even more difficult. Ultimately, many smart guys come up with the following logical conclusion: I AM A SMART GUY, THEREFORE IF I CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN AND DATING, THEN THE PROBLEM MUST NOT BE SOLVABLE OR WORTH SOLVING. Try that on for a self-defeating idea. REASON #2: THEY'RE BLIND AND ARROGANT In short, many smart guys refuse to accept that a good, solid, workable answer could come from someone "dumber" than them, so they discount any idea that comes from an "obviously less intelligent person" before trying it. Let me ask you a question: If you were going to be walking across Africa on foot, would you rather have your guide be the guy on this planet with the highest I.Q., or a caveman who lived a million years ago that had an I.Q. of about 50... but who grew up being chased by lions and all kinds of animals that wanted to eat him all his life? It's an interesting question. Now, hopefully you'd like to have the guide who isn't the smartest guy around... but who has escaped from many, many dangerous situations with deadly animals... But now let me ask you: If you'd like to learn how to be more successful with women and dating, would you take advice from a guy who isn't very intelligent, but who knows how to attract women? There's something about being smart that makes some guys unwilling to accept input, ideas, or instruction from anyone who isn't either as smart or smarter than them. Well, any SMART GUY can see the folly in this particular approach... once it's examined closely. If you've been making this mistake, then you need to STOP IT. Stop being an arrogant bastard, and open your eyes. Look around. Learn from some "dumb" guys... and let them teach you how to get what you REALLY want. REASON #3: POOR SOCIAL SKILLS It BLOWS MY MIND how many smart guys I meet that just don't GET IT when it comes to basic social skills. It's as if they have logically reasoned that social skills are for lower beings who need to play games... and not worth the time it would take to learn them. In fact, I believe that there are a lot of smart guys running around this planet who don't even have "social skills" and "be a cool guy that people like" in their "MENTAL MODEL" of what it could possibly take to be successful with women and dating. Social skills are just that... SKILLS. They're not social INFORMATION. They're not social THEORIES. They're social SKILLS. And you don't get them by THINKING about them. You get them by GETTING them. Excellent social skills are the foundation for good communication with other humans... and if you don't have good social skills, you dramatically lower your chances for success with women. REASON #4: THEY PSYCH THEMSELVES OUT Smart guys do something that fascinates the hell out of me... They come up with all the reasons why everything WON'T WORK when it comes to women and dating. They actually figure out why what they would like to do will probably fail... They use their amazing creative imaginations to imagine all kinds of horrible pictures and scenes... and then they use those imaginary outcomes to create negative emotions... which ultimately stop them from having success with women and dating. THEY DON'T EVEN TRY. Now, if you've thought something through and come up with a good reason why it would fail, it makes sense to not do it, right? I mean, why would you want to do things that are going to fail? It's sound logic, but HORRIBLE thinking when it comes to the REAL WORLD... and success with women. Because smart guys don't UNDERSTAND women, and they don't UNDERSTAND what it takes to be successful with women, they are working with bad figures. They're wrong before they even start figuring! Using your mind to come up with all the reasons why things won't work in this area of your life leads to ULTIMATE FAILURE. You must learn to overcome this habit if you have it. REASON #5: THEY SEEK ONLY "INFORMATIONAL SOLUTIONS" What does a smart guy do when he runs into a problem... or he needs to figure something out? He looks for INFORMATION to help him solve the problem. MORE INFORMATION is always the answer. Information is the friend of a smart guy. Got a strange virus on your computer? Just hop on the internet and search for how to eliminate it. Don't know how to change the alternator on your car? No prob. Just buy the manual and turn to page 147. Don't know the definition of a word? Open up your dictionary. MORE INFORMATION solves the problem. So what do smart guys do when it comes to overcoming a problem with women? They want MORE INFORMATION. They think the answer lies in learning just ONE MORE TECHNIQUE... or one more magic concept. Well what if there were a situation in life where the "get more information" strategy actually made things WORSE? How would you even know that it was making things worse? Now, I don't want to suggest that learning more about how to be successful with women is a bad thing. It's not. But if you have a problem that is EMOTIONAL or PHYSICAL in nature, then reading five million theories on it probably isn't going to help you very much. You need to get out in the real world and try some stuff! You need to look at the REAL problem... the ROOT of the problem. When it comes to women and dating, there's a very good chance that you have MORE than enough "information". Smart guys often use "more information" to distract them from TAKING ACTION. I've heard this referred to as "Creative Avoidance". Nod silently if you've ever figured out a creative way to avoid facing something in your life. Good, thank you. REASON #6: THEY FOCUS ON LOGIC INSTEAD OF EMOTION NEWS JUST IN: Women don't feel ATTRACTION for men who make them THINK. Women feel ATTRACTION for men who make them FEEL. So what do most smart guys do when they first meet a woman? EXACTLY! They get into a LOGICAL CONVERSATION. I'm shaking my head right now... Smart men try to engage women in LOGICAL conversations and interactions because that's where THEY feel comfortable... not knowing that they're SHOOTING THELSEVES IN THE FOOT by doing it! Get this: A monkey sitting at a typewriter will type the collected works of Shakespeare before you will make a woman feel ATTRACTION for you by engaging her in logical conversation. When you start a logical conversation with a woman you've just met, you are basically taking out a NEON SIGN that says "I don't get it when it comes to women" and putting it on your head. Typical "logical" conversations include talking about work, family, school, and jobs... discussing politics, religion, weather... and anything that has to do with math, science, or INTELLIGENCE. On the other hand, if you start talking to a woman and you say "OK, so tell me something... Why is it that all women say that they want sweet, nice guys... but they all date sexy, selfish bad boys?" (and then make fun of any answer she gives) you're having an EMOTIONAL conversation. If you don't know what I'm talking about, keep reading. You need more help than I thought. REASON #7: THEY'RE NOT USED TO THE CHALLENGE OF THE MOMENT Smart people usually have time to THINK about things. If you're taking a test, you can sit there and work out the answers. If you have a math problem, you can work on it until you've figured it out. If you're trying to fix something, you can keep working on it until it's fixed. Smart guys are used to being able to take at least a LITTLE bit of time to prepare and show off their "good sides" in most situations. Not so with women... If you don't know what to do at every step along the way, you'll be shut down very quickly. Women have an AMAZING "He doesn't get it" radar system. Women have all kinds of subtle and ingenious tests that they throw at men to separate the "get its" from the "don't get its". And if you don't get it, then you're going to fail one of these tests VERY quickly. But the worst part is that you won't ever KNOW that you were being tested... OR that you failed. Smart guys aren't used to dealing with complex EMOTIONAL and COMMUNICATION challenges in the moment... and especially the "women and dating" kind. One of they keys to becoming more successful with women and dating is learning to handle all of the tests that women throw at you effortlessly. But before you can learn how to deal with the tests, you must first learn how to communicate on an emotional level, how to demonstrate that you have fundamental social skills, and how to keep your cool in the moment. REASON #8: THEY THINK THAT DOING "NICE" THINGS IS THE "SMART WAY" OK, let me ask you a trick question: If I told you that you were going to have a date with the supermodel of your choice, which of the following would you choose as a "smart" way of preparing: 1) Find out what her favorite type of flowers are, and show up with a dozen of them so she would be "wowed". 2) Learn about her favorite travel destination so you could discuss it with her. 3) Find out what her favorite type of food is so you could take her to dinner... and she could see that you cared enough to choose something that she enjoyed. OK, time's up. Which did you choose? Now, I already mentioned that this was a TRICK question. The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE. But WHY? These three options all seemed logical, right? I mean, why WOULDN'T you want to show up with her favorite flowers? Why WOULDN'T you want to talk about her favorite places to travel? Why WOULDN'T you want to take her to eat her favorite foods so she enjoyed herself? Go with me here... Smart guys think that they're being CLEVER when they do things like buying a woman her favorite flowers... and bringing them to the FIRST DATE. Right? In their minds, they're thinking "I'm going to be the guy who is thinking ahead... and I'm going to show up with the flowers that I KNOW she loves... and she's going to see them and like me more because of it". Makes sense... good math, right? Well the one teensy-weensy mistake that these "smart" guys make is not realizing that it doesn't actually take a smart person to think like this! In fact, ANY jackass can figure out how to kiss a woman's [wagon]. And guess what? WOMEN KNOW THIS! And guess what else? EVERY WUSSBAG DOES THIS STUFF. An intelligent guy, in his proud arrogance, will think he's being such the charmer by using this "thoughtful" approach... ...and the woman he is chasing will interpret it as just another Wussy who's trying to MANIPULATE her. Ouch. Another blow to intelligence. MISTAKE #9: ALWAYS NEEDING TO BE THE EXPERT Have you ever met a smart guy who always needed to be "right"? Have you ever met someone who would actually argue with you about something they knew nothing about... and make a fool of themselves because they just couldn't shut their "smart mouths"? Over the last few years helping guys improve their success with women, I see this one pattern over and over again... Smart guys don't like to be "beginners" at ANYTHING. They don't like the idea of screwing up... especially if others are watching. They want to maintain this "smart guy" image of themselves... so they try to always be "The Expert" at whatever they do. Instead of saying "Hey, you know what? I'm a beginner at this... how do I do it? What should I do first? What next?"... and instead of being totally OK with screwing up, making mistakes, and making a fool of themselves in front of others in order to LEARN... ...they won't risk embarrassment, failure, or others thinking that they're beginners... so they wind up ultimately FAILING. MORE NEWS JUST IN: It's OK to be a beginner. MISTAKE #10: THEY CAN'T DEAL WITH FEAR AND OTHER EMOTIONS A smart guy's STRENGTH is his MIND. His WEAKNESS is often his EMOTIONS. Smart guys are often IMMOBILIZED by FEAR. Totally stopped. FROZEN. And since many smart guys aren't comfortable dealing with things they're not good at, they just repress or RUN away from fear. Many men would rather DIE in lonely isolation than admit that they don't know how to deal with their emotions... or, GODFORBID, ask for help! Hey, I went for YEARS like this. I know what it's like. But the reality is that any guy can learn to handle and even MASTER his emotions (even fear)... if he just takes the time and effort to learn HOW to do it. If this is you, then do yourself a big favor... take the time. Take the effort. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks of you... it doesn't matter. What matters is you doing the things that YOU need to do FOR YOU. ...I think the reason why I'm so fascinated with "The Genius Failure Paradox" is because I have had to struggle with all of these issues for a lot of years of my life.[/hide]

I'd through my posts about touch escalation and hardwired attraction switches etc, has a lot of useful information. You could just ctr f, type iamdan and flick back through the pages, c&p the stuff you find useful. Most of my more informative posts are a bit further back, the later ones somtimes refer to previous posts I made. Start by getting her number, it's easy as hell while you're in school. Just start a conversation and say something like, 'you're pretty cool, we should trade numbers.' A few random tips for phone game: [hide=] Don't be too eager, try to be light hearted and funny, and always be having a more interesting time than her. Also make your replies come at random times. A few of my favorites: I bet my weekend can kick your weekend's [wagon] Out of all the (her first name and last name)'s I know, you're my favourite you just popped into my head so hi... now stay out of there be sure to role play [/hide] Then sometime in the future, tell her you're doing x and that she should come along and hang out. edit: Trust me, the same stuff works on basically everyone. She might be into geeks, but she's not into geeks that don't trigger attraction switches.

It's true that looks don't really matter (as far as how you were born, the way you present yourself is still important) like it does for girls. Guys are attracted to physical traits that show fertility, girls aren't looking for fertility :P How it works is a girl sacrifices some of her replication value (by committing to 1 guy) for some of his survival value. (by having to take care of somebody else) Giving her a name is a good idea, though I personally wouldn't call her babe. I'd just pick a physical trait and go on that, like freckles or curly. And holy [bleep] I just found out today that a girl I went to primary school with is a meter maid at the gold coast, and she's on beauty and the geek now too. I think I had a little thing with her too.

Duh? Just because everyone here's a guy with girl problems doesn't mean that if girls were here they wouldn't have the same problems (but... I see where you're coming from. Girls getting "friend zoned" problem happen less because society dictates that the male make the approach). Nuh its cause I always see vids of guys getting friend zoned and I've never thought of guys having their own friend zone. my friend zone is basically 'cool but not hot,' it's probably the same for other guys

yes I lol'd. Sorry. Its just that my views are like completly the opposite. :lol: May I ask why you view relationships that way? Relationships generally end up with a huge dependence on each other, as well as lots of fighting and threatening to break up with each other that never gets for filled because they are too comfortable with their routine of being together. From what I've seen anyway - it's what happened to every relationship I know of after 3 years or so.

If that was directed at me I'm not sure anymore that I'm not interested.. We've hung out a few times and I can't get her out of my head now -.-

After hanging out with her a couple times I can't get that girl I posted about (p225) out of my head, but I don't find her physically attractive.. (i think) She's not bad looking, kinda pretty but kinda plain. It's driving me nuts. I went over her place, got a txt from a girl I know that basically said 'lets be [bleep] buddies' and I actually said no which isn't like me at all. I then didn't tell her about the txt, which is also not like me. She asked me to stay the night and I almost did. AHH :wall:

You could do it with your body language and actions, but since time is important (with the other guy flirting with her and all) you would need experience to do it properly fast enough. It's not necessary to do since you're in school but it would help your chances.

You did good here, chances are she would have said yes if you didn't screw up so badly here: 9 times out of 10, doing that will completely mess up your chances - but you're in school so it's probably still ok. When you do that, you're telling her that she has the higher value and you're chasing her. She doesn't want a guy with a lower value then her own, it would just decrease hers. Just try and plough through attraction switches, (if you don't know how to DHV read through the thread) after a month or so tell her you're over her but that she's cool and that she should tag along when you do x for a fun time. Don't even worry about this other guy, he's not competition. OT: WOW. I'm not going to go into the details but the jealousy card works wonders - even when it gets played by accident :???:

By occam's razor, do you mean "when you have two competing theories that have the same solution, the simpler one is the better." As that is not really what occam's razor is about. It is really talking about how "entities must not be multiplied beyond necessity" In other words, as both of these theories are equal in scientific merit, since both are theories, the one which should be accepted is the one which demands the fewer assumptions. Since it is far easier to assume that a supernatural being whom we have no proof of created everything, rather than that matter at one time came into existence, compacted, exploded, and produced everything, and since then never comes into existence anymore, then I believe that Occam's Razor supports the Genesis account. What? :huh: My post was about symbolism vs fundamentalism, not genesis vs big bang. I do know what occam's razor means, and it supports my point. [hide] Um, what? Firstly, as a general gripe, people need to stop pointing at the Crusades like they're the critical piece of evidence in a murder case. The Crusades were really nothing more than the personal campaigns of corrupt popes who thought they had a claim to Jerusalem. There was no such thing as fundamentalism to disagree with at the time of the Crusades. Rome was the center of the world, and the pope was the most powerful ruler in Europe. Whatever he said went. The Bible was available only in Latin or Greek, making interpretation limited to those who could read it, which was basically the clergy, which answered to the pope. No random peasant could read the Bible for himself and decide on a fundamentalist interpretation. He couldn't read the damn thing. That was a major point of contention in the Protestant Reformation, which began in the early 1500s, 300 years after the Crusades. Why did Martin Luther and others like him want reform? Because they disagreed with the policies of a Church that had built itself an empire and was now primarily interested staying on top. That meant keeping the common folk ignorant of the actual contents of the Bible. So how much can such a secular interpretation be counted on? Martin Luther ended up leading a rebellion because the Church was selling indulgences, which I'm sure can be universally agreed upon as wrongheaded. The Church reformed itself at the Council of Trent, and much later again at Vatican II. If you want to look at it this way, it could be said that the Church is still fixing itself up from the days when popes publicly acknowledged illegitimate children and appointed them as bishops. Basically I got kind of annoyed at how the Crusades are thrown around, because people seem to think they are a hell of a lot more significant that they actually are. I'm not sure if there's a real driving point behind this post other than a history upchuck, but hopefully the upchuck will add a bit more depth to the "damn Christians just kill everyone" argument. Take what you will out of the fact that no one but Church officials could read the Bible until the sixteenth century. [/hide] I was having a panic attack at the time and didn't express some of my thoughts very well. What I mean is, basically anyone who disagreed with the church was killed, so what they said went, including the interpretation of the bible. This interpretation was a fundamentalist view. I do think the crusades are pretty significant however, because if it wasn't for the big religion wars then it's likely a different religion would dominate the western world.

Just because you say no at the end of your sentences, does NOT make it so. So when trying to insult my intelligence do not assume I did not read your post. I read it, and a simple no does not justify a change in the religious story. When it was first written, I am confident they discussed the symbolic importance assuming it was meant to be taken metaphorically. ---- Too many people are reading the topic title, then replying. It's gone on too many pages to construct a continous arguement, and those that are still attempting to argue are ignoring my points and not really reading. One minded views with no room to listen to others. I am attempting to take in advice and new points I was unaware of, but anything I digest and throw back is discarded. I'm out of this heated topic, I don't have the energy. I'm not trying to insult your intelligence, you really do come across as either not reading or not understanding my posts. I had a quick read through your posts here and most seem to have already been disputed, or lead to nowhere. They were questions I answered in hopes that you would answer them, which you haven't elaborated on. Why else would fundamentalism be so widespread? I would have thought it would have been squashed during the crusades like everything else the church disagreed with. What is symbolic about jesus saying all prayers will be answered, but apparently only some of them are? What is symbolic about the world being created in 7 days in relation to evolution. I could ask those questions to 50 different Christians and get 50 different answers. You can take pretty much anything from it using your imagination. Why not just invent your own religion entirely? You can spout elitist symbolic theories, but they aren't going to be consistent with the next Christian, and occam's razor is always going to be better.

Yes. My post disputed your reply before you even made it, and I gave examples. Do you really think when it was first written everyone gathered in church and discussed the symbolic importance of things? No. Would fundamentalism be so widespread until recently if it hadn't been even more widespread in the first place? No. Now you have theories like god causing evolution, prayers only being answered 'some of the time' and that god isn't perfect after all. All of them weak changes to the story,

Did you read like, any of my post apart from the bit about changing the story?

She likes you. I ended up hanging out with that girl, we're doing it again this week. I told her I wasn't interested in being more than friends, at the moment the only way I see this going is us hanging out a couple times and me getting bored eventually because she doesn't say much.

See, the bible is supposed to be taken literally. Do you really think when it was first written everyone gathered in church and discussed the symbolic importance of things? No. The only reason why fundamentalism is dying out, is because science is moving forward. Christianity needs to change it's story as it crumbles or die out - it twists it's own logic until you can't disprove it. It is constantly changing to suit science. Now you have theories like god causing evolution, prayers only being answered 'some of the time' and that god isn't perfect after all. All of them weak changes to the story, as a result of being backed into corner by science and logic.