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Last one to post wins


ProtoGuy

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Nah not now. Gotta finish the rest of my work.

"Let your anger be as a monkey in a piñata... hiding amongst the candy... hoping the kids don't break through with the stick." - Master Tang

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That's just awful.

"Let your anger be as a monkey in a piñata... hiding amongst the candy... hoping the kids don't break through with the stick." - Master Tang

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Ohp I didn't read that one, sparknoted as well.

 

[hide]You're talking to a random stranger.

 

Stranger: welcome to the inch store

You: Which seat can I take?!

Stranger: how many inches you like?

You: Seventeen and three quarters

Stranger: would you settled for 8?

You: Hmm

You: Is that discounted?

Stranger: Satisfaction guarantee

You: And if I'm not satisfied what do I do?

You: Chop it into bits and burn it in a pile of pictures of your mother's face?

Stranger: No. But you can use your grandmas face.

You: Oh okay

You: She's dead

You: What will it show up as on my credit card statement?

Stranger: You'll the psycho. Not me

You: I will the psycho?

Stranger: Nothing but cash.

You: Oh. How much?

Stranger: How bad you want them?

You: Wait

You: How many are there?!

Stranger: 8

You: Oh, right

You: And they're all packed separately right?

Stranger: Stack one on top of another

You: But they come apart easily right?

Stranger: No.

You: How am I supposed to share with the children?

Stranger: But you have the choice of using the ones you need.

Stranger: That's against the law. Cant serve inches to children.

You: I don't give a flying dildo about the law

You: I share all I receive with the children.

Stranger: Sorry but i do. Or i can lose my license.

Stranger: So good bye.

The Stranger has disconnected.[/hide]

/FG/First thread post to when I joined the family.

VR48f.jpg

[hide=Insert rant here]blahblahblahLIFE[/hide]

img

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[hide]You're talking to a random stranger.

 

Stranger: HI

You: HI

Stranger: HOW U DOING

You: GOOD

You: U

Stranger: NOT BAD

You: COOL

Stranger: WHERE ARE U FROM

You: MY MOMS VAGINA

You: U

Stranger: I AM FROM CHINA

You: MADE IN CHINA

You: VERY NICE

You: MM RICE

You: LEAD PAINT

You: DEAD BABIE

Stranger: HEHE

You: Y U STEAL ALL OUR JOBS

Stranger: U ARE MISUNDERSTOOD BY THE MEDIA I THINK

You: OH HOW IS IT FOR REAL THEN

You: U ARE MISUNDERSTOOD BY YOUR MEDIA

You: WHAT HAPPENED TIENEMEN SQUARE?

Stranger: BECAUSE OUR MEDIA ALSO ALWAYS PUT SOME BAD NEWS FROM OTHER COUNTRY ESPECIALLY USA

You: OUR COUNTRY AIRS PRO CHINA COMMERCIALS

You: ABOUT HOW U ARE THE FUTURE

You: DO U HEAR NICE THINGS OF USA

Stranger: I HAVE TO ADMIT SOME ARE TRUE EVEN I HATE THESE PEOPLE

Stranger: NOT MUCH FROM CHINESE MEDIA

You: CENSORSHIP IS BAD

You: SO IS COMMUNISM

Stranger: CENSORSHIP?

You: BLOCKING MEDIA

You: CONTROLLING EVERYTHING YOU HEAR AND SEE

You: BEST THING OF CHINA IS PANDAS

Stranger: YES, BUT ITS A SYSTEM QUESTION SO HARD TO DISCUSS

You: SECOND IS FOOD WHEN IT DOESNT HAVE DOG IN IT

You: OR CAT

Stranger: NOT ONLY CHINESE EAT DOG OR CAT

Stranger: KOREAN EAT DOG AND JAPANESE EAT WHALE

You: AND JAPANESE EAT DOLPHIN

You: AND AFRICAN EAT BUGS

Stranger: YES, THE MOVIE SHOWS IT

You: AND AMERICAN EAT COW FECES

Stranger: FACE?

You: NO POOP

You: FECAL MATTER

Stranger: WHATEVER

Stranger: U LIKE CHINESE FOOD?

You: YES

You: I AM GOING TO EAT IT TONIGHT

Stranger: FOR EXAMPLE

You: ISNT IT MIDDLE OF NIGHT IN CHINA NOW

Stranger: NO, I STUDY IN ENGLAND SO NOT TOO LATE

You: AROUND TEN PM

Stranger: YES

Stranger: U ALSO?

You: NO

You: IM IN AMERICA

You: FOUR PM APPROACHING

Stranger: EAST COAST?

You: NO MIDDLE

Stranger: STUDY?

You: NOT IN UNIVERSITY UNTIL NEXT AUTUMN

Stranger: FINE

You: I MUST END CHAT

Stranger: SO A LOT OF CHINESE PEOPLE GRAB JOBS?

You: SOMETIMES

You: GOODBYE

Stranger: FINE, NICE TALK WITH U

You: YES

You have disconnected.[/hide]

 

Tl;dr I said some nice things to a Chinese student.

/FG/First thread post to when I joined the family.

VR48f.jpg

[hide=Insert rant here]blahblahblahLIFE[/hide]

img

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But it's 5 in the afternoon.

"Let your anger be as a monkey in a piñata... hiding amongst the candy... hoping the kids don't break through with the stick." - Master Tang

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It's 4:15 here and I'm tired, I got 5 1/2 hours of sleep on a night during the weekend. I function fine with less sleep during the week oddly enough. Actually, I nap like this sometimes during the week too.

 

Plus, I'm kinda bored.

/FG/First thread post to when I joined the family.

VR48f.jpg

[hide=Insert rant here]blahblahblahLIFE[/hide]

img

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