MuffinMaddy

I had periods of inactivity, or simply lurking I guess. I'm only more active now because I'm on my year abroad and have nothing to do

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Wow wtf how have I been on tif for 9 years lol what have i done with my life ffs

Reminds me of this classic English Fiasco.http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2193984/Essex-Lion-picture-revealed-police-search-admit-probably-large-domestic-cat.html The Essex lion! Those were the days

I feel quite nervous for my first actual high profile marching band performance lol. It's next week at the end of Toronto fashion week and I should probably calm down but I'm kind of anxious at the minute. I've been watching videos in preparation but I'm happy I've pretty much absolutely mastered two of the songs we're playing. I just need to work a little harder on the Galway Piper and on Superstition - it's quite weird because I think my saxophone is mostly in tune except for one note and it just means that I have to play the natural note rather than the flat as written on the sheet (I'm thinking it could just be a mistake on my sheet music). Otherwise, I was in a bad mood for about 20 ish minutes but I perked up pretty quickly which is awesome. Only thing is I have a medicinal chemistry midterm on Friday night and afterwards I have drill because that's the only time the basketball courts are free for the band to practice marching.

I can't wait to go home. Today was mothers day in Britain and everyone's posting about their mums and it just would have been so good to spend it with my mum especially as it coincided with Ghana's independence day. It's a proud occasion because it's the only West African country to have never had a civil war and in general my two visits there have been absolutely amazing and I can't wait to visit again. I don't normally have country pride but I feel so much love right now, probably from looking at some photos of me and family /friends

Lol don't remember posting here last night. Some people I know were at the raptors game and saw him on Friday night I was a wreck last night lol, knocking over chairs at the bar constantly. Had a few conversations with doormen at different bars downtown and drunk messaged a few group chats about mental illness lol ffs Either way I'm six months in and have two more to go so the sand timer is definitely running

I hope Canadians don't actually think drake's hotline bling is actually a good song cause I'm drunk as [bleep] and I left the club because of how shit it is

Brilliant day. Finally got access to my British bank account again. The first thing I did was book my flight home - I'm officially coming home in just over 8 weeks' time. I also sorted out my trip to Washington DC and paid for the marching band weekend in Montreal. I'm really excited for the coming month - I also might go to a formal for science students at the end of next week. I've never been to a formal before, so I'm looking forward to looking nice for an evening. I have kind of spontaneously agreed to perform with the band this Thursday at a hockey game, as they perform at most sporting events that involve the University and I was encouraged to perform for at least one, so I could get a feel of performing before I leave. I've done some budgeting and I was a bit worried about money, but I will be just fine. I've put down the maximum cost of things and I will still have a healthy amount left in my account after that, so it's good to know that. I just need to look at travelling to and from airports - there's a direct line from Gatwick airport to where I live so that should be good. I am buzzing to come home \:D/ Guys, I'd also like to hear what you think of Donald Trump. I know its random but I've just seen a video of one of his rallies and while I deliberately avoid politics I was very saddened by some of the stuff I saw in the video.

Man, I'm making a video about HIV as part of a group project and my team members want me to be the narrator for the voice over sections because I'm British and they like my accent. It's so depressing. I've just made my section of the video, complete with editing and music from my favourite German film called Das Leben Der Anderen, also known as The Lives of Others. That in itself is one of the saddest films I've ever watched, but the movement fits the topic so well. I feel like music can be mismatched with videos very often so I wanted to take charge of it for my section. Otherwise yeah, it looks "good" but talking about such a devastating disease is just so saddening - especially as I've had to put lots of pictures in the video and talk about poverty and stigma.

Think I deserve a medal to be honest. Drunk last night, made it to band practice at 8am on two hours of sleep. Group project at 12. Laser tag at 3pm. Then got to watch contagion for tomorrow's lecture

I leave for downtown in 10 minutes. My friend who I'm meant to be going out with hasn't shown up yet but I'm determined to go. I've started drinking and I'm feeling woozy, I hope this is a good night lol

Happy birthday hedgehog and rpg. Hope you've had a great day! I want to drink but I can't bring myself to move at the moment

Why are you so mean to the Americans here, lol? It's not very nice to be that condescending (it doesn't really look like a joke, but if I'm wrong then I apologise) - are you going to be like that when you go travelling? Friday night exams woo (better than Saturday night I guess) on Human Physiology Bad headache and I'm pretty mad at my bank for not giving me access to my bank account since my card was stolen a whole month ago.

I [bleep]ed up lol. I can't see Sean Paul perform next month because I already signed up to play the saxophone at Toronto fashion week. I had to give away my ticket, because I made my friend buy one so that we could go together but since I can't go, I gave it to a friend of hers that wanted to come as well.

Okay I'm not really a social media Queen b although obviously I'm uploading year abroad photos and posting funny things once in a while, but I'm kinda sorta delighted that the uni really liked one of my pictures and reposted it, describing me as an international student and they used the hashtag "best student life". It's actually cracking me up because it doesn't take a whole lot of digging to find out how much I hate things here sometimes I can see that I am such a token. The band are all sending me friend requests now and promoting the picture lol I troll in most things I do but it's still making me laugh

As a female, I think all of your advice on women is on point.

I don't get that kind of response though. Black people in America always seem to be so proud of being black, their heritage, etc. But the moment you ask them something actually significant, or meaningful, they find it offensive. I understand what you're saying, because even i wouldn't ask a black person from America what tribe they're from. I just don't understand why it's an offensive thing to ask. Do white people get offended if they're asked what their roots are? I get that a nationality isn't a tribe, but it kind of is. So if someone asks me if i'm half English/Scottish/German/whatever, do i get offended? Should i? Just doesn't make sense to me. "I'm proud to be black/indian, but don't ask me anything about it ever." nationality isn't a tribe but ethnic group is. Europe has several ethnic groups Slavic - most of eastern europe German - germany, france, england, italy Celtic - welsh, irish, scottish Greek Latin basque etc. middle east has several arab jewish persian armenian turkish kurdish etc. You forgot that most Scandinavians are also Germanic.And one large European group at least was left out, us Finno-Ugrians. Call me Slavic and I'll punch you. I'm pretty sure he wasn't intending to write a comprehensive list.

I don't get that kind of response though. Black people in America always seem to be so proud of being black, their heritage, etc. But the moment you ask them something actually significant, or meaningful, they find it offensive. I understand what you're saying, because even i wouldn't ask a black person from America what tribe they're from. I just don't understand why it's an offensive thing to ask. Do white people get offended if they're asked what their roots are? I get that a nationality isn't a tribe, but it kind of is. So if someone asks me if i'm half English/Scottish/German/whatever, do i get offended? Should i? Just doesn't make sense to me. "I'm proud to be black/indian, but don't ask me anything about it ever." nationality isn't a tribe but ethnic group is. This so many times, and can I please underline again and again that I never once said I was offended. I know I sound super defensive but it's just making me antsy because when Noxx was like "black people get so offended when you ask a specific thing about them" when 1) after I already said that I was amused by the question, it's turned into a conversation where it's being discussed "Is it racist?" "Is it not racist?" when I never said it was? I thought it was amusing, funny, weird, whatever and I'll say it again, to ask what tribe I was from purely based off of me being black (because I wasn't born in Africa, it's a WEIRD question to ask) and 2) I'm very open to questions, and if I can't answer them, then I can't answer them. My mum would be a much more suited person to answer such a question because she was actually born in Africa. Anyway, as long as the spiral conversation didn't happen because people think I'm offended, then great lol.

It's not a racist question in my opinion. My original point was that I was amused by it. Noxx was the one bringing feeling "offended" into it when I never said I was offended. Literally if you go back to my post, I didn't say I was offended. I was just saying explaining why some people might be after the word offended was brought up. My boyfriend's dad doesn't know I speak any languages other than English and German lol. I legit never said I was offended, it's actually quite weird that this conversation has started from something that I never said I was?

I'm going to be honest with you and say I have no problem at all with you or anybody else having reservations, or having stereotypical views about certain groups of people. I've met lots of very different people. I went to Germany 6 years ago on a scheme that brought people from all over the world together over a summer holiday and some of the people from Eastern Europe who had no experience of interacting with black people took a few days to observe me and sort of figure me out. Once they'd established that I'm normal, and nothing to be wary of, we became good friends. They did apologise but honestly, it's OK to not be used to it. I think part of the reason I have friends from lots of different backgrounds is (partially) because I was born in an environment that was heavily multicultural. But also, because I treat everybody exactly the same and get to know people as individuals. At the end of the day, both my parents came from almost homogeneously black countries and came to the UK, so they had to adjust accordingly as well. As long as you don't treat people differently because of how you view them, then I'm absolutely fine. My problem lies with people actually treating other people differently for no reason other than race. Unfortunately, I'm booking my flight out of Canada on May 2nd. Toronto is brilliant though, it's easily my favourite city at the moment honestly. I speak a number of languages, but the one I tend to speak on the phone is called Ga spoken in small communities in Ghana. Not many people speak it, it's quite typical that I'll meet someone from Ghana and be like "Awesome" and then find out they speak the other, more popular languages that I can only understand and not speak

Not sure why that's amusing, to be honest. Pretty sure if Maddy did some research she'd be able to find out what tribe her ancestors were from. Many countries in Africa still have tribes, and people from those tribes wouldn't take any offence if you ask them what tribe they're from. Sometimes it baffles what westerners find offensive. People trying to be too PC. I hope you're not implying that I was offended, because I wasn't. I was amused by the whole saga because before his family met me, they assumed I was born in Africa and his younger brother said "Those international students are very hardworking." A lot was assumed about me before they met me, all based on the description that I'm black. I found it funny that the first few questions asked were "What's the main export of West Africa?" and other questions. I trolled lightly and said I was a distant relative of the Ghanaian president. I just know that if I was dating someone from another race (and I am) it would be bizarre for me to ask their tribe, or clan, or something that isn't really something they would know, having been born and raised in the UK - that's what made it funny to me. It's assuming someone knows more detail into their background than someone else does because they're not white. I don't get that kind of response though. Black people in America always seem to be so proud of being black, their heritage, etc. But the moment you ask them something actually significant, or meaningful, they find it offensive. I understand what you're saying, because even i wouldn't ask a black person from America what tribe they're from. I just don't understand why it's an offensive thing to ask. Do white people get offended if they're asked what their roots are? I get that a nationality isn't a tribe, but it kind of is. So if someone asks me if i'm half English/Scottish/German/whatever, do i get offended? Should i? Just doesn't make sense to me. "I'm proud to be black/indian, but don't ask me anything about it ever." For me, I am who I am, I'm not proud of being black because I achieved nothing by being black. I don't really feel proud about something that isn't an achievement. I am comfortable and happy with who I am, yes. I still don't need to run around screaming it, though. There's a lot you can ask a black/indian/non-white person, such as whether the person's multilingual for example. Asking what tribe they're from almost assumes they'd know that sort of stuff off the bat. Anyway, being black/indian/non-white has way more to it than belonging to a tribe, come on. The connotations of the word 'tribe' can also be offensive to some people. What tribe are you from could definitely be seen as a condescending question. Besides, I don't ask white people about their roots. I totally welcome questions about my background. I speak another language to my mum on the phone and obviously I've had questions about that. I answer questions on cuisine and cultural questions to the best of my ability as well. And in order not to double post, it's exactly a year since I found out I was going to Canada. I remember being very confused about it and not really knowing what to think. I was preparing for decent weather because two of my options were for countries much warmer, so when I got given a place in Canada I was a bit surprised. I think I've survived the worst of the Canadian winter so far (i really, really hope that's the case) but it's known to get bitterly cold in Montreal so I'm nervous about the March parade

also my home University Yaks are hilarious as well. Don't lie, it's the same shit week in and week out. And recycled jokes from reddit. And like every wednesday night(thurs morning) at about 4am the lecherous spawn with their "Any F dtf in x". "Post-Fed Sex any1??". :PP Nah I'm not talking about the Post-Fed stuff. Those are boring, although I actually miss Sub Zero a little bit :huh: I just laugh at some of the stuff said about Colchester and Greenstead stuff I will be around in the last week for the last Fed though lol, cause loads of my friends graduate this year so I think I'll be at "The End" but I won't be giving the SU any money for the summer ball, it's overrated. Last year exam period Yak was pretty vicious though, with people in the reading room being the main targets and just dodgy DJs lol. Made me a bit wary of coming to campus at times. I wish I had set it as my herd, though because I'm just trolling in Canada but no one really understands it

Well, it's pretty vicious in Canada, but when I "peek" at my hometown Yaks, they make me laugh and also my home University Yaks are hilarious as well. They do cheer me up. I bought a hoodie today - the prices here are obscene. I wanted to buy a hoodie and a shirt because I'm running out of merchandise to wear for band practice and my budget was about $100. The hoodie I bought was $45 and the top I wanted was so much more so I just bought the hoodie and went to Wendys. I now have all the hoodies I want: One from high school, one from my home Uni, one from this uni and one from Quebec City which is definitely my favourite. Also I smashed my Medicinal Chemistry exam. I misread a few questions, but otherwise I got some of the more difficult questions correct and I'm pretty pleased with myself about it. I actually feel smart enough to be here now. I just get the feeling that when people make jokes about my intelligence, they actually mean it lol. It doesn't annoy me or anything but I feel like there's a bit of truth in it when my housemate brags that he goes to a top ten UK university and mine's top 40. Can't help but be a tiny bit smug at doing better than him ;) This is kinda why I turn to music because everyone makes fun of me but being a musician is the one thing people can't be like "oh you're bad at that" so I'm kind of clinging to it. I had a read of my Airbnb review from my host last week - she was so lovely about me, I didn't expect her message to make me so happy but I've actually saved it in my phone because I get down here quite often so I think I'll go back and read things like that when I'm feeling like crap.

My boyfriend's dad says coloured and it makes his entire family so antsy. It's actually so funny, we'll be watching TV and he's like "the black guy was the lawyer" or something and then he'll think that he can't say black and then say "the coloured guy was the lawyer" and my boyfriend's family all facedesk. It just makes me laugh. The first day he met me he asked which tribe I was from lol. He doesn't mean any harm but it's pretty amusing, especially as my family never had any gaffes when they met him for the first time lol. But yeah racial tension shit. I had no idea it was this bad out here. Makes me appreciate home so much. Most people get along really well. It's just like people are generally embarrassed to be racist at home and keep it within confined groups, but over here it's so overt. I've tried so hard not to resent people, only 2 months left of this. One thing I'm happy about is that I'm in the marching band now and it takes my mind off stuff. I like being unquestionably good at something. I can doubt my ability at just about everything, but I know that I can play more than one instrument to advanced level and it feels good to share that in common with the cool people at band practice. The songs we play are pretty awesome too. We're performing in Montreal pretty soon and it'll be a hoot, I think. I guess I kind of see why people in the band only hang out with each other. It's probably my safest bet to not just get depressed with the atmosphere to be honest. I meant in coloured, as in black, hispanic, asian, everything. Here I think over 99% still are white. But yeah, one reason we don't really tolerate others is the former Soviet occupation and the remaining 300k Russians in the country (ok, among them are quite a lot of Belarusians and Ukrainians and Tatars and so on). Them Russians have gothered into their own suburbs or territories and visiting northeastern parts of the country sometimes it feels like being in a foreign country with people speaking only Russian everywhere. There have been national tensions over time, the biggest one our first and only real riot in April 2007. I think most of the people think we shouldn't take any refugees until we assimilate them Russians who don't have any nationality (over 200k of them here, former Soviet citizens with no citizenship anywhere. In Estonia you won't get citizenship simply by being born on our territory). And thus we are xenophobic against other peoples. That's actually very interesting to read, Saq. Busy day for me today: I have to stick posters up around campus (it's my job) and collect my exam paper for my Medicinal Chemistry exam that I sat a few weeks ago. Then I need to buy some more Uni merchandise because of band practice, and then do my groceries. Then I need to most importantly, study really hard for my exam tomorrow morning. I'll probably have a nap afterwards and then do the quiz I'll need to do by 4pm Wednesday and then start studying for my Friday evening exam. I might squeeze in a trip to buy some vodka as well. I definitely want to drink this weekend.