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I think using my summery of events since Earth was destroyed would work reasonably well as a pre-quote (The bit in italics, before the rest of the document). Though it is reasonably long... Starting out- So maybe the character generation, explaining the puzzle system...Astronuts, Nitros Oxide and the Sandwich Broadside The Nexurado Incident- Nex and Nero battle for control The Great British Ship Robbery- British ship raid Japan Strikes Back- Raiding Europa The Incident of the American Patrol in the Night- Build up to fleeing from the Sol Meet the Descar- Self Explanitory The Quest for Mineral Rights- Jeremiah's Duel with the Keeper of Keys Wave of Darkness- Fleeing the Arch System The Same, Yet Different- Returning to Sol, founding Asgard, ect. Rattling the Sabre- Jen's capture and destruction of the Kirby/Saber Doomsday- End of the Earth The Quest for Food- Self Explan Europa, the Final Frontier- Battle for Europa and such Nero's New Tank- Nero returns A Long Lost Villian- Jen's showdown Germanicus- Nero declares war Colonies and Empires- Terran Empire, Prospket and Asgard.

Updated the page to include some general knowledge. If someone could go through and link the various tropes(I don't know how and am not that big on my tropes so...)

And so begins the Tavern's Biography. Should probably create a seperate thread for the tropes. Since Earth and Nex our the architects the honour should probably fall to them.

Blasted thing deleted my selection of quotes...Oh well: Logs in an easy to download(and search) form http://dl.dropbox.com/u/12603519/Space/Logs/Logs.rar "I understand that this is a joke, but I would say it is something to consider nonetheless. I'm sick of humans fighting amongst themselves. I'd rather fight everything else in the galaxy instead." Captain Jeremiah on Genocide "You liar! Thats it! Next session I'm either going to beat you senseless or I'm gonna get heavily injured trying!" Chief Medical Officer on crew morale " "presently undisclosed mission" meaning "he's gonna try to kill the Unity again" " Theros translates the former Captain's words "Thinks she is younger than she is, assessment of insanity is validated." The SI finally does a pshyce evaluation "being naked is not an asset when a ship is being borded." Vice Captain Nexurado outlines tactics "Oh yay, that means the Labrynthus and all my research data is gone." Captain Jeremiah's responce to the destruction of Mercury " Yup, damn those Alliance for genociding. Damn those Commonwealth for trying to stay alive. Damn those British for getting fed up. Damn those Tfed for not accepting those three types of people. Clearly everyone in the system is evil." SI sums up the situation. "In 2075, after an extended period without internet, the UN decrees that only one space ship may be launched into space." The Origins of the Game Ship " Meanwhile the Space Powers, Britian and Unity...basically...go 'Oh noes' and begin evacuating Earth with the general idea that once you have 50 million starving, hungry and disease ridden people, it will be a synch. Britian then goes hmmm...we can deal with 30 million, and kills off 20 million people. The evacuees go WTH! And mutiny. Unity goes 200,000 is easy! Britian goes W/E, this is a headache. Unity goes what if we created a new planet to feed these people! Britian goes hey, I want a peice of that! Unity goes NO! and calls in the mutiny brigade to help them kill the British fleet trying to steal the planet. Britain goes W/E, this is a headache. Unity realises that 200,000 people on a station, with no public amenities, brown pills for food and no government, is a bad idea. Unity decides to solve this by putting in some buildings. 200,000 people used the buildings FOR OFF LABEL USES, LIKE BUILDING WEAPONS! Unity discovers the brown pills are drugs if burned and are being used OFF-LABEL AS WEAPONS! Unity goes W/E, this is a headache, where is the genocide ray? Drake goes, man, humans suck, and becomes Apep. Apep goes, wouldn't it be good if Humans were better? Apep releases virus on Asgard. 200,000 people begin mutating. Jen goes WTH and declares war on the mutants. Jen goes, hmm, people are weak, annex!!!! Unity realises something is going on. Earth charges in, and gets taken over. Jermiah goes, kill it it with fire. Jen goes WTH and disables the Unity. Jeremiah goes kill it with fire. Theros goes yay. Piriana explodes into the station. Jen goes WTH and throws psionics at it until it goes away. Earth goes hmm, boring and throws himself at it till it goes away. Earth weakens Jen. Jeremiah goes WTH and throws himself at it till it goes away. Theros goes WEEEEEEEEEE and throws himself at it till it goes away. Jen goes I have a headache, timeout? Theros goes NO! and shoots her. Apep goes guise, I was evil! Jeremiah goes, hey, can I be evil too? Bonsai goes, yeah, me too! Apep goes get the hell away from me. Faust goes whatever happened to Nero? Chi goes, wouldn't it be better if my arm was a scanner. " 1 Month of Space "Well then if you're not a pacifist then you're a terrible murderer." Summing up Chi's Achievements thus far. "My sanity isn't a joke, it's a straight out lie." Chief Science officer Chi The SI explains economics onboard the Unity. "Jeremiah would say that a research AI does not need eight ion cannons, stealthing, or ten fission generators." Research AI explains the benefits of Free Market Economics over Planned Economy. "Ok I will build you an Jeep. With SKIS FOR WHEELS WOOHOO" Captain Nero displays puzzle solving skills "I just changed numbers until two results became equal if that's what you're asking." Chief Science Officer Chi explains algebra

Yeah, people keep coming up with the tech tree idea. Ultimately people find it annoying or spam it. Example: Napoleonic Hegemony, where Retech spammed all the techs anyone came up with. And Tech Trees that cover Hegemony would need to be VAST, I mean you would need to play 5 full games of Hegemony to get a tech tree that even vaguely resembled a completed one.

Minor updates: Brazil: Brazil has begun bombing runs of Argentina, as well as cruise missile strikes against Argentine naval forces. With the overwhelming might of Brazil against them many warlords have turned their loyalties over to that of the Brazilian Government. This, of course, has not stopped raiding parties forming and looting neighbouring countries for food and basic medical resources. Brazil, along with Paraguay and Uruguay, have formed several army groups and advanced on a wide front to bottle up the Argentine forces in Argentina. Of course this has had virtually no effect, since the line quickly became distended, due to terrain, fighting and other various reasons, resulting in roving bands of Paraguians, Uruguians and Brazilians roving around each other's countries with a free pass to mischief and mayhem. While some of the battle groups remained mostly disciplined, most did not. As a result the spread of 'Argentine' raids has increased and all three Governments have pulled back their forces in the hopes of stemming the violence...which has largely succeeded leading to serious questions being asked of the Generals in charge of the operation. Elsewhere the new Argentine Constitution has been drafted, which has produced several 'states', largely borne out of Warlords Territory. Also the Brazilian airfoce has swelled to over 10,000 aircraft. The vast orders have crashed local economies and resulted in -5% growth. Aircraft carriers have also been scrapped. Brazil's leader has been temporarily deposed by his/her general staff, the reasons for this are unclear, but Government insiders state it has something to do with the recently re/de/re/de/commissioned ICBM silos. The silos never got off the planning stage, but the national union of ICBM contractors have, supposedly, threatened to strike if another order and cancellation occurs. A spokesperson said 'We are not made of ICBMS!' The Brazilian Leader's therapy should be completed next year. Russia: In Russia the Great Lord Serephus(Or whatever) has been deposed in a bloodless coup by the United Socialist Social Republicans, under the catchy elision(kinda) U'S'S'R, or, phonetically, You-Tsar. The Great and powerful Comrade Serephus has risen to power. Switzlerland: Another cartoon has been released, though there has been no real responce anywhere. There are two hands shaking, one with "Europe" on the arm-collar, and the other "South America". However, a third hand, labeled "Brazil" can be seen bringing a sword down upon the hand symbolizing Europe. This is released throughout Europe and South America, the captions in their respective languages. The Swiss Nuclear Energy Union is launching protests against their power stations being shut down for a whole year. Various union members have said that 'They are doing it because they think Brazil is going to overreact to some cartoons! Who ever heard of anything so silly.' Their overall affect has been negligible so far. South America: Recent events, such as the creation of the Brazilian Puppet(not really) state of Argentina, have lead to a fundermental shift in South American Policies, resulting in the creation of the 'Brazil' issue. While the Easten half of South America favours Brazils policies, along with Columbia, the West fears it intensely. This has been borne out in recent election results, which show that the East are willing to do anything to keep in with Brazil, while the West have begun vast rhetoric based attacks, as well as increasing taxation and even turning a blind eye to the destruction of Brazilian Factories. The effect is thus: Urgaguay, Paraguay and Argentina become 100% puppets of Brazil. Columbia, Guyana and Suriname remains unchanged. Chile, Venezula Bolivia, Peru and Equador have become diametrically opposed to anything, and everything, Brazil does. While not quite at the stage where if Brazil outlawed slavery, they would make it legal, the point is still valid, and they will basically resist anything Brazil has a large part of.

Well, no matter what you decide we all support you, in PF or RT. :thumbup:

But, but... Meh, ok, speed running PF then, let the powergaming commence! (jk)

I thought RT was Saturdays and PF was Sundays? Or are we saying different times on the same day?

Yes.... A binlid flying up and hitting someone in the mouth is funny, if you are around to see it. My point is that a blue screen of death, which may get seen over the next 2 days, isn't funny because, unless you stand next to the computer, you won't see them do it...and unless they are imbecilic they won't come up and say 'Oh I was trying to use the computer and it wasn't working, so I tried restarting it and there was a background like the blue screen of death, I sure hope I wasn't pranked, oh well I guess I will just go and retype that unsaved document.' It is far more likely that they will spend 5 minutes freaking out, then restart the computer, then see it was a prank, then be angry at you for wasting their time on a trivial thing, and even if you saved all their work before setting it up, they will not know that until after you tell them, which will mean, unless they are very good natured, they will shout at you before you have the chance. So ultimately, its about as funny as a booby trap in a tome. Its like getting someone's flute, that they haven't played in years, and are unlikely to play for years more, and sticking something in one of the holes. Unless you ask them to play the flute, in which case they may be suspitious given the request, then the likelihood is that it will be some years before your prank goes off, if ever. And if you ever happen to be working in the same office as me, in a set of highly unlikely circumstances, what will probably happen is that your backups will mysteriously disappear once I discover the deception and I will get you fired(Or more likely I will just get you shouted at because I, like most people, have zero interest in your wellbeing, and am far more concern with not losing my job because next time you really do delete my files thanks to your idiotic prank)...So ultimately the prank is not terribly funny...Slightly funny for about 3 minutes, then its actually not funny at all. Further, what is the point of disabling hotkeys? I mean, seriously? Person sits down, person sees the BSoD, you laugh, joke ends. Not Person sits down, person sees the BSoD, you laugh, the person frantically tries to recover the documents, you laugh some more, person restarts computer, you laugh some more, person gets you fired, you lose your job, person laughs at you. Unless you were somekind of imbecil, or don't actually need the job. If you happen to be their boss then you will almost certainly lose your job, if you run your own bussiness...Police? I would sue you for discrimination, its the only reason I can think of why you would only target me. I mean its like you are taking the Sticky Note-Mouse thing(Perfectly reasonable practical joke), and supergluing the stickynote to the mouse, then disconnecting the mouse, opening it up and taking the laser or ball out. Its not funny, its just timeconsuming and socially inept because they have to ask you to fix the problem, and if someone is angry at you, and have to ask you for help then that makes them mad, and mad people tend to get you fired. Calculators that give off different numbers, again, its over time consuming and requires you to come and fix the problem. Its also not amazingly funny, at best it is snicker worthy. Last one...I am meh on it. Mainly because I would never shower at work, but mostly because, as Retech said, Sexual Harressment...or even Voyerism: But hey, as long as you get a laugh out of it.

I thought the purpose of pranks was that they make you laugh...rather than just being bad for the other person...

Well there is, you could ask someone...ie me...And they would carefully type out most things...though they would get fairly hissy after a while.

There isn't one, unfortunately. :thumbdown: There is probably a way round it, but none that could be discussed.

You know what makes it worse...It slows down the internet! Its such a total waste of bandwidth.

Spain: Spain has placed a massive order for 7,000 Eurofighters, Mark III, with the French Manufacturing Giants. While the order has been split up and spread over a few years to help bring the French economy back under control, the first order of 800 EU3s has been dispatched already, using spare parts and decommissioned fighters from the vast French Air Fleet. Cities in Spain have begun a substanial bunker building program, largely thanks to government investment. The new bunkers make heavy used of Ultra Reinforced Concrete, developed independantly in France. In addition to this Spain has begun construction of a new, underground, city, known as Amadís, after the Iberian hero of Chivalric Romance period. The new city, the first of its kind in the modern world, has been widely critised by the rest of the world, who note that those people who live in it will 'Breath fetid air, be pale by complextion and live with only mushrooms for food.' Spainish people themselves are enthusiastic about the new settlement, seeing themselves as exploring the unknown frontier, shunned by science and religion alike. Española del Hidrógeno (EH, or Spanish Hydrogen) has been incorporated and has attempted to expand into Morroco and Algeria, however Libya, the new African President, has denied them entry. On an unrelated note, the Spanish army has, unoffically, swelled by half a million men and begun training civilians in the use of gas masks and drilling against air attacks. The drill have been tolerated, but not accepted, with people ignoring some drills altogether, while in other cases arriving some half an hour after the sirens went off. At present the drills seem to have done more harm than good. On the flip side, the economy hasn't suffered from the interruptions. Then, in a shocking turn of events, Spain and Germany bombed American woodlands. The American public was initially baffled by this, however the American Government then released pictures from the bomb sites, showing bombed out Native American and Gypsy settlements. The American Government, and people, have condemned the vile act of ethnic cleansing, but made the statement: "We have recieved intelligence that suggests that the Spanish 'believed' we were building Nuclear Missile Silos. I can catagorically state we have no Nuclear Weapons, and since all records and designs were destroyed in 2010, on Global Disarmament Day, we can only assume that the Spanish were tricked by the Germans, who's record on Ethnic Cleansing speaks for itself, and who's recent interference in the Canadian War of Aggression, perpetrated against us, lead to the deaths of many, many good Americans. We can only assume that the Germans, in their quest for a master race, have fed false information to the Spanish. If this is the case then there will be blood, but not Spanish, for an apology, and a 5 Billion Dollar(not Euro) fund to be set up to help the surviors of this great tragedy, is all that we ask from them. But from Germany...From Germany we demand the ceasation of war, the resignation of their chancellor and their willingness to submit to an American lead Weapons Inspection." Germany has condemned the American statement, providing numerous satalite photos, all of which have been condemned as forgeries by America, with one senator saying "How do we know that these are not GERMAN MISSILE SILOS?" Adding further gas to the fire is the presence of radiation in the bomb sites. The radiation levels indicate a sub-nuclear bomb, probably a nuclear waste bomb, more than atomic bomb, consistant with a country which does not have a nuclear weapons program. However the Americans have used this as proof that Germany is launching Nuclear Strikes, while Germany has used this as proof that America was preparing for Nuclear Strikes. International inspectors, from various neutral countries, have been allowed to inspect one of the bomb sites, and have found no evidence of any silos or American missile bases, instead finding half destroyed caravans, charred corpses and bomb craters. Other bomb sites have been considered far too dangerous, due to Canadian and German troops amassing on the border, though there is some question as to how dangerous a bomb site in California is if the German/Canadian forces attacked. In any event Spain, for that is who's report this is, is scared that they may have been duped. Russia: Russia has launched hundreds of Stratellites, and have begun transmitting six channels, avalible across the entire globe. The six channels are really just two channels, but each are encoded in NTSC, PAL and SECAM. One Channel is HPM, or Новости России Международная(Russian News International), while the other broadcasts educational programs for Children during the daytime, Young Adults during the late afternoon, and Adults in the evening. The second channel is set to regional time while the first channel is live. Both channels have recieved some flak for broadcasting over nationally assigned channels and several lawsuits have been filed. The Russian Government has done nothing about this as there are very few areas where it would possible to change the channel number. Elsewhere a Human Rights Group, known as По правам человека Международной группы Пропаганда (Human Rights International Advocacy Group) has begun protesting over the treatment of workers in many parts of the world, specifically Brazil where economic growth has not resulted in decreased taxation and so the workers are being exploited, and are being kept from making enough money to better themselves. The Advocacy Group has also condemned Germany, South Africa, America, Britian, France and Brazil for its involvement in various wars around the world, and for using people as government pawns in a sick game of chess to acquire resources across the Globle. The Russian people in general have applauded the introduction of the Global Television Iniative, though have been less supportive of the Human Rights Group, who they see as bolshy. Mexico Mexico has been seen as the paragon of virtue by many Religious people around the world, and thus given the power to see the future by God. Argentina: South Africa, along with Britian and France, have all pulled out of Argentina, which has lead to wide spread collapse of power and the rise of several Warlord like leaders. Raiding parties have been sent across into Brazil, Chile, Paraguay and Uraguay...The Legacy of looting continues. An entire Battalion of Brazilians were captured, along with dozens of shiny new tanks, along with fuel supplies. Argentine's National Motto has become 'Helping Us Help Us Help Ourselves' Their national Anthem has been changed to an Argentine Version of: [hide] [/hide] South Africa: South Africa has stepped down as President of the United States of Africa, passing the leadership to Libya. Libya has advocated an increasingly 'Africa for Africans' policy. Brazil Brazil has been temporaily rebuffed from investing in South America. This has been caused by three things. First, the offer of increased investments has reawoken many fears. Second, Swiss Cartoons have reawoken many fears. Third, given the power Argentina has displayed in the past, and its violence against Brazil, many fear getting pulled into a war by their trading with Brazil...or Brazil using their industy to produce weapons, and thus more likely to be attacked by the power hungry Argentina. Japan Japan has continued investing in Iceland, now controlling 69% of the countries Industy. Switzerland Switzerland has released a cartoon: A picture depicting the Brazilian Generalissamo as the pale rider, holding an ICBM, riding towards the horizon. Under the hooves of the rider's horse lie broken trees, with "freedom" and "democracy" blended in the branches. On the horizon there is a bustling city, with the caption "Europe" hovering above it. The Brazilian rider is saying "There will be a day when ICBMs soar through the skies of South America and Europe, but today will not be that day." The overall affects in Europe have been minimal, since most people are more concerned with other issues. South America, on the other hand, has grown increasing afraid of Brazil's continuing attempts to compete with Europe, with terms like 'Empire' becoming increasingly commonplace. Elsewhere, Switzerland has begun drills for Biological warfare attacks, and border patrols have been strengthened, investment in Guyana and Bolivia has also been undertaken.

Depends how people react: For example, the silly cursor is really ticking me off, not so much because it looks idiotic, but because there is someone out there with the power and inclination to force their will on me, and there is nothing I can do to stop it. Ergo, I see that they are also planning to take a harsher line with trolling and I think 'Hypocrits'. I also think: [hide] [/hide] :thumbsup:

You would think so...though it wouldn't suprise me if you got a knock at the door...

Not availible in your country :thumbdown:

For the sake of reference: Due to family, personal and technical reasons(The latter of which is not my fault :thumbsup: ) the update has been carried over to tommorow. The Year still happened, though no significant events happened(Research was still begun, however).

I would imagine that it worked like this: Country A and B exist. Country A has Hydrogen Technology. Country B has a functional Economy. Country A invests 10% of Country B's GDP to create a Hydrogen Cracking Facility(or whatever). County B's Power Consumption increases. If country B is rich, like Australia, then the Germans sell more cars, allowing them to buy more power, allowing the Australians to build more power stations(Their cleaness being largely ignored). If country B is poor, like Dirtsville, then there are less cars, requiring less power, allowing Dirtvillians to slowly expand their power consumption over time.(Again cleaness is ignored)

It is 2026 They were designed in the 80s, and introduced in the 90s... So thats a 40 year old aircraft. Verses a cutting edge aircraft, complete with full anti-stealth radar. And there are only 20 of them. Basically, last generation Stealth is outdated, for Germany...I don't think anyone else has the technology at present.

They seem amiable to this trade deal. (You would steal 1% growth from Ico)

Hehe 'Run, its a ficus!' Space is/was the Tavern's In Joke Generator =P

China: Following a protracted war the Republic of China has unseated the People's Republic of China, which has shrivelled into nothingness. Argentine War: Argentine President Hamlet has stepped down. Government sources say that he had taken time out from his busy schedual to hear audience from two poor farmers, when, all of a sudden, a South American ICBM crashed into the roof, loosening a peice of plaster, which fell and crushed the two farmers. Hamlet, on seeing his people killed in this manner immediately struck a pose and remarked 'Something is rotten in the state of Africa', he then tried to lift the great lump by himself, but, despite his straining, he was unable to shift it. He then struck another pose and said 'Providence has its appointed hour for everything. We cannot command results, we can only strive.' he then said he was stepping down, and that his people should wait for the sign. Though no one really knows what he meant, and given his disappearence, no one is ever likely to know what he meant, many have taken it to mean the end of the war with the rest of the world, and that they should lay down their arms and live to fight another day. As such the Argentine State has been occupied by the United States of Africa, Britian and France, all seeking to restore law and order. The Argentine army has been disbanded, with many returning with terrible wounds inflicted during the last days of the war, largely due to ICBM and Cruise Missile Attacks, a lack of a Government and the exaustion of all petrol for military ambulences...or fighter cover, leading to skies dominated by British, French and African Bombers and Fighters. The future of Argentina looks bleak, though at least they are no longer at war...though with reperation treaties in full swing, and look set to extract many decades of payments. Industry in Argentina is also in heavy decline, with the war over and the Government in shambles, there was nothing to stop the large multinationals from pulling out...the end of slavery may also have contributed to this exodus, and it may, neigh, probably will be impossible for Argentina to ever recover...With rebels rising up, claiming to have seen the sign and thus being the true inheritors of Argentina, the occupying forces will have their hands full for many, many years. Brazil has demanded the immediate withdrawel of Foreign Forces, now that Argentina is subdued, to which the British and French have agreed to open negotiations on. Total Casualties: Many hundreds of thousands. 2< Million South Africa: 100 ICBMs, 40 Aircraft and 1 submarine. The aftermath in Europe is expected to be quite serious, as both Britian and France had prepared for a longer war, with Military Industry still fully mobilised. France has, unfortunately, no where to send the surplus and is suffocating under it. Britian has begun aiding Canada, providing a steady stream of fighters, bombers and military equipment...Though is remaining offically neutral in the war. Switzerland Switzerland has reaffirmed their commitment to National Service. South Africa: "With the successful conclusion of the South American war, one would assume that South Africa would take a break, relax...But no! We find them pilfering from Germany!" Says one Clear Sky Operative. "We had heard that South Africa was quite simply the best in the field of espionage, and had wished them to test...to see...if the German Countermeasures were sufficent to protect the vast technological power that they hold. Instead they bring is jibberish on disks! Our agents in Germany have recieved information that the German Government knew of the deception and had taken steps to prevent the data being stolen. Germany truely is the country destined to lead humanity out of the valley of the shadow and into the sunlit uplands of peace and prosperity." ~African Newspaper, Article 'Is South Africa Past it?' In this, the election year for the New President of the United States of Africa, South Africa is dragging its heels. Last year's raidings shocked all of Africa...for all the bluff and rethoric, South Africa was as frail as any other. Now, with their complicity in a failed attempt to steal technology from Germany exposed, South Africa has become a Lame Duck, with power slipping towards Libya... America American Bombers have been shot down, apparently Canada prepared for the assault on Regina...Shocking in many ways, especially to the Americans, who didn't realise how many AA guns could be built over the course of a year. The Canadian War itself has begun to lose ground, with Germany's increasing presence in the war the American Army, Navy and airforce have begun taking increasing losses, while Canada is taking fewer losses. The Siege of Ottawa has finally been broken, largely due to German Blitz and Storm Eurofighters, new this year. The aircraft quickly scared the American Pilots from the sky, with their superiour manouevring and targetting abilities, outmatching the older American planes in practically everyway. The Americans, who had been more or less instructed to fight until the Canadians gave up, found themselves without air support, and shortly thereafter began experiancing supply shortages as German forces began executing hit and run tactics, as well as interdiction. At home Germany has recieved an offical commendation from Clear Sky as having good security following the South African attempt to steal research. Across the seas and Germany is beginning a Green, Hydrogen, Economy in the Congo, Australia, and the Phillipines. The new fuel conversion, along with car exports has been enough to raise German growth by 2%, as well as reduce emissions by 6,000. Peru, however, declined the investment, favouring a large bonus from Brazil instead.

I think it actually older than Space...by a number of decades... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rogue_Trader_(Warhammer_40,000) *cough*