lordkrohn1626 Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 These people prove it is a terminal condition. As always, competition this year has been keen. The candidates this year are... Eighth Place In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys. Seventh Place A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who 'totally zoned when he ran,' accidentally jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily run. Sixth Place While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 foot hole for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital. Fifth Place Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor. Fourth Place Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger. Third Place After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms intent on robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was standing at the counter. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up, and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and several customers also drew their guns and fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt. HONORABLE MENTION Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just driving around at 2 A.M. so they lit a quarter stick of dynamite to toss out the window to see what would happen. Apparently they failed to notice the window was closed. RUNNER UP Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable, lay near by. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and the tied the other to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located. AND THE WINNER IS... Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief. Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded. The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves... "poop happens" :XD: RS name: lord krohn Combat 138slayer specific: 103 whips, 38 dark bows and 250+ dragon boots dropped to date.Dragon drops: 5 Half shields, 21 drag legs, 8 dragon skirts, and 9 drag meds dropped to date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brandon_7 Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Wow, people are really smart nowadays. It's sad that they died but they did some amazingly stupid things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lordkrohn1626 Posted August 3, 2007 Author Share Posted August 3, 2007 Wow, people are really smart nowadays. It's sad that they died but they did some amazingly stupid things. hehe yeah...every now and then the human gene pool needs a little chlorine :wink: RS name: lord krohn Combat 138slayer specific: 103 whips, 38 dark bows and 250+ dragon boots dropped to date.Dragon drops: 5 Half shields, 21 drag legs, 8 dragon skirts, and 9 drag meds dropped to date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bartoron Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Wow, people are really smart nowadays. It's sad that they died but they did some amazingly stupid things. Survival of the fittest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devilsdragon Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Wow, people are really smart nowadays. It's sad that they died but they did some amazingly stupid things. go look up the history of the darwin awards, stupid things happen all the time my favorite was the guy who jogged off a cliff because i heard of the elephant story before Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lordkrohn1626 Posted August 3, 2007 Author Share Posted August 3, 2007 1st, 4th and 5th place were my favs...love the flashlight through the brain....ironic justice :P RS name: lord krohn Combat 138slayer specific: 103 whips, 38 dark bows and 250+ dragon boots dropped to date.Dragon drops: 5 Half shields, 21 drag legs, 8 dragon skirts, and 9 drag meds dropped to date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nadril Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 I've seen this a while ago somewhere... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lordkrohn1626 Posted August 3, 2007 Author Share Posted August 3, 2007 I've seen this a while ago somewhere... ya its probably been floating around, you know how it is with the internet. It was posted on a senior enlisted military forum site that I am a member with, in the humor section....I love Darwin's awards and couldn't resist sharing it with my fellow tipiters. enjoy :mrgreen: RS name: lord krohn Combat 138slayer specific: 103 whips, 38 dark bows and 250+ dragon boots dropped to date.Dragon drops: 5 Half shields, 21 drag legs, 8 dragon skirts, and 9 drag meds dropped to date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercifull Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Whats with the copy and pasting posts the last few days? Remember the golden rule with the internet is that if you think you've found something new you can guarantee everyone else has already seen it. Mercifull <3 Suzi "We don't want players to be able to buy their way to success in RuneScape. If we let players start doing this, it devalues RuneScape for others. We feel your status in real-life shouldn't affect your ability to be successful in RuneScape" Jagex 01/04/01 - 02/03/12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zonorhc Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Yeah, and I can't believe you failed to mention the poor sod who tried to play Russian Roulette with a 9mm. Varrock Library: Shattered Sky | Silent Thunder | The Emperor's FinestAstri @ MythWeavers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThoseTheBrokes Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 RUNNER UP Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable, lay near by. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and the tied the other to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located. but he didn't die.. I thought the darwin awards was for stupid deaths.. My dA account..retired, as of the 1st January 2008. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wakka102 Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 The Elephant one is the best, what a way to go :lol: :shock: #-o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
warri0r45 Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I like the firearm shop robber. What an idiot. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pkmastachaos Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I like the firearm shop robber. What an idiot. :lol: Yeah really, how stupid can people be? All in all they all seemed to just lack common sense, and they paid for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
____ Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I thought the darwin awards was for stupid deaths..Yes it is, which is why that never should've been in with them. It was stupid, yes. But since he didn't die.. not stupid enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bartoron Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I thought the darwin awards was for stupid deaths..Yes it is, which is why that never should've been in with them. It was stupid, yes. But since he didn't die.. not stupid enough. You don't have to die from an experience for it to be stupid. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biggy08755 Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I thought the darwin awards was for stupid deaths..Yes it is, which is why that never should've been in with them. It was stupid, yes. But since he didn't die.. not stupid enough. You don't have to die from an experience for it to be stupid. ;) You do if you want a darwin award. well today at 11:30 am 14 years ago i was born.. wo0t!!!At 11:30 you should start holding your head underwater wo0t!!!Stop acting such a moron. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devilsdragon Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 RUNNER UP Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable, lay near by. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and the tied the other to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located. but he didn't die.. I thought the darwin awards was for stupid deaths.. yeah he shouldn't be allowed that high, but you can also win a darwin award if you are sterile(or sterilize yourself in the process) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenin64 Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I've heard a few of those before, especially the elephant one, and I have a potential darwin Award: I saw a cigar shop right next to some of those big gas tanks that run somewhere, i dont know where really, but just imagine; the cigar shop catches fire first.... Command the Murderous Chalices! Drink ye harpooners! drink and swear, ye men that man the deathful whaleboat's bow- Death to Moby Dick!BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trapical Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I call shenanigans on the winning one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doomy Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 My fave didn't come anywhere! Doomy edit: I like sheep Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lordkrohn1626 Posted August 4, 2007 Author Share Posted August 4, 2007 Whats with the copy and pasting posts the last few days? Remember the golden rule with the internet is that if you think you've found something new you can guarantee everyone else has already seen it. sorry all, was on duty, bored and surfing the other forums i belong to, saw these couple of funny items, laughed and thought you all would enjoy, didnt realize there is a specific spot for "jokes"...my bad. RS name: lord krohn Combat 138slayer specific: 103 whips, 38 dark bows and 250+ dragon boots dropped to date.Dragon drops: 5 Half shields, 21 drag legs, 8 dragon skirts, and 9 drag meds dropped to date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darkmage099 Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 I like the firearm shop robber. What an idiot. :lol: Yeah really, how stupid can people be? All in all they all seemed to just lack common sense, and they paid for it. Some of them were unlucky, like the finalist. Trix.--quit WoW as of 12/07Thank you 4be2jue for the wonderful sig and avatar! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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