Granted but they tell everyone every single bad thing and blame it on you. Everyone believes them and kills you.

 

 

 

I wish Goonstalf wouldn't spam the game forums as much.

Granted, Goonstalf knows when he's unwanted and heads off to his favorite corner to cry.

 

 

 

I wish I had better things to do then play barb assault and spam the games forum

Granted, you've been drafted to the U.S. Army. No regrets?

 

 

 

I wish I could shoot laz0rz from my eyes.

 

 

 

Edit: Also, it's not spam if his posts are relevant to the topic.

Granted. However, you can't control the laz0rz and end up cutting your family into itty bitty pieces.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish Mechscape would come out tomorrow with absolutely no bugs or problems of any kind whatsoever and stay that way for the rest of my life.

Granted but you die the very second jagex uploads the game.

 

 

 

I wish I had a pet rock named bob.

Granted! Turns out Bob isn't a rock though, he's a poisonous snail. The very same day that you get him, while you're asleep, Bob slithers over onto your bed and....... you get struck by lightning.

 

 

 

I wish I could get more hours at work.

Granted but you die the very second jagex uploads the game.

 

 

 

I wish I had a pet rock named bob.

 

 

 

Granted, but it has rabies and has to be put to sleep.

 

 

 

I wish I had a bagel.

I wish I could get more hours at work.

 

 

 

Granted. However, you end up just getting fired because you keep coming in late because you are too preoccupied with posting on forum games.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish the person above me had ruined the wish he was supposed to.

Granted, he does, and to add insult to injury acenator steals his bagel. But unfortunately the bagel had rabies and ace has to be put to sleep.

 

 

 

I wish there were some way I could turn this block of cheese into smaller shredded cheese bits.

Granted. However, you somehow manage to cut yourself with the cheese grater and bleed to death.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish I knew what to wish for.

Granted, it was a puppy. It dies.

 

 

 

I wish I knew how to charge and fire muh lazur

Granted. However, since nobody has invented said "lazur" and you can therefore neither charge nor shoot one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish I had an unlimited supply of oil that I could draw on at whatever rate I wanted to that would allow me to control the oil markets.

Granted, you now have unlimited supply of olive oil. Italian restaurants tremble at the mention of your name.

 

 

 

I wish Reese's Cups didnt have so much packaging

Granted. They now have absolutely no packaging and get eaten by bugs and/or touched by the hands of random people who walk by said delicious candy.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish the people running the U.S. government were honest, knew what they were doing, and always did what was right for the country and not for their own pockets/egos.

Granted, but then a meteorite hits the earth and ends it all anyway.

 

 

 

I wish Futurama was on.

Granted, but then a meteorite hits the earth and ends it all anyway.

 

 

 

I wish Futurama was on.

 

 

 

Granted, it's the Fountain of Youth episode.

 

 

 

YOU wish I didn't jack your Captain Falcon category

Granted, but I realize that Spongebob Squarepants is a category in the new one and I aim to destroy him.

 

 

 

I wish that my cat could fly.

Granted, but I realize that Spongebob Squarepants is a category in the new one and I aim to destroy him.

 

 

 

I wish that my cat could fly.

 

 

 

It flies away, then comes back with an unstoppable army of lolcats to destroy you.

 

 

 

I wish I didn't have to change 3 of the categories back.

Granted, but then you realize that no one really knows how that game works anyway, so you kill yourself.

 

 

 

I wish I had a pet sloth.

Granted. However, it somehow eats some anti-deppressants, goes crazy, and kills you.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish rules were perfectly understandable for everyone.

Granted, the rules are so straight forward that everyone in the games forum loses the will to survive and jumps in front of a bus.

 

 

 

I wish there was a way to get free cookies.

Granted, the rules are so straight forward that everyone in the games forum loses the will to survive and jumps in front of a bus.

 

 

 

I wish there was a way to get free cookies.

 

 

 

Granted, bu you are arrested for stealing and given the death penalty.

 

 

 

I wish I were the Commander of the Intergalactic House of Pancakes.

Granted, but the Imperial Realm of the Waffles destroys all the pancakes.

 

 

 

I wish people would stop rawring at me

Granted. However, they decide that, since they are no long rawring at you, they need something else to do to you. After a short discussion, they all pull out guns and use you for target practice.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish I could sleep and surf the internet at the same time.

Granted, the devil hears your plea and allows this, but in return he takes your fingers. Irony to the max.

 

 

 

I wish I knew how to roll with the gangstas