Veiva

Yay Yendorian Priest: (Notice what he's based on?) [hide] His name is a reference to Ulyaoth from Eternal Darkness. Ulyauth is the Eldritch god I aligned myself with on my first play-through. Yendor, the cliff-hanger dead god-boss that'll be at the end of the tutorial. [/hide] He sells supplies for incense and bonfire effigies, which will provide time-limited buffs via firemaking. Bonfires provide strong, but AoE, buffs while incense provides smaller, but immediate, buffs. For example, the Eldritch myrrh will make Dreadful incense which increases accuracy by an additive 50% for both you and your opponents. This makes firemaking ... not useless, like it is in RuneScape proper. Herblore will only provide immediate stat restoration and stat boosts. It'll take 70 bones to make enough bone shards for the Eldritch myrrh. For the record, that's a major time sink. The rest are a lot more reasonable. You get 15 shards per bone, and all humanoids/ex-humanoids drop bones.

zsh master race oh-my-zsh <3

something looks different Also I had Thanksgiving with a friend, was pretty cool. One of his family members was IT so it was fun talking to him about all kinds of technology crap lol. I dropped dinner off at my brother's work (Wally Word) and seethed with hatred for consumerism. There was no parking. On a Thanksgiving. My software co-op is gonna be called End Korp. #edgycommunist (ok I'll stop that.) ... shops: You won't be able to sell to shops, there's going to be greedy chest mimics that buy your crap.

If you don't need a reference, should just use your vacation time then quit. Because they wouldn't give you two weeks notice when they fire you. #edgycommunist

Are your benefits through Federal or State? Hopefully there's an officer somewhere you could discuss how they came up with their incorrect numbers (my guess is pre tax errors) and place you in the correct spectrum of the program. Government is far from perfect Federal. I have no idea how they got the numbers they did (incorrect data from background check company?), because I've been reporting my gross wages like I should be.

I got a letter today saying Social Security is terminating my benefits effective January. But they've got the wage data all screwed up for the last few months (they say I've made $500 more than I did each month). And I should qualify for the grace period which means any month I don't make over $1,180 (aka almost every month) I'll still receive benefits for the next 3 years. I'm not too worried (I want to enter the grace period thing), but it's still a bit worrying.

FreeBSD is easier to install and set up than Arch Linux. I jumped from Windows to FreeBSD and had no problems setting it up and using it. Now it runs my desktop and home server.

freebsd is better than linux which is better than windows fight me

In fairness, I imagine part of this is Apple working so hard to lock down the phone so you can't interface except through iTunes. I know I had similar troubles with my ipod back in the day. I'm pretty sure it's the Windows 10 photo app, not Apple, because the Adobe one worked just fine.

rant about technology: [hide]why is windows 10 a flaming piece of crap I can't import my photos from my iphone why does adobe's app require me to log in why does abobe's app take more than 10 seconds to install on my i7 / ssd / 300 mbps internet setup why did adobe's app take out my explorer shell why did adobe's app add some crappy explorer shortcut to some "creative cloud" that requires a registry edit to remove why does technology suck do I seriously have to boot into linux to import my photos [bleep]ing hell these shitty programmers need to be fired and their managers sent to the gulag why do they have a 6-figure salary and I don't[/hide] Washington DC was awesome <3. On the way back I realized I had a fun time and enjoyed myself and was super happy without needing anyone else. So in short it was a major realization that happiness comes from me--I shouldn't need anyone else. I mean, I still think I'm unattractive and will die alone but it doesn't hurt as much knowing that it doesn't matter because I can be happy on my own. Here's some of my favorite pictures! [hide] I love Ancient Egypt, was so happy the Smithsonian had an exhibit. Hope diamond, worth over $250 million. There's two armed security guards outside. I'll be able to afford it when I'm 60. It was closed to the public. :( A da Vinci painting. One of my favorite van Gogh paintings. I love van Gogh <3. This painting had a "no picture" sign. I noticed after I took the photo. I'm sneaky. You! Me! Dancing <3 I recorded the whole song. I learned from my mistake when I didn't record Shake It Out or Dog Days are Over from Florence + The Machine concert. it's only meh quality but it's still awesome. [/hide] I'm aware some of the images are on their side I accidentally stripped the exif data.

Los Campesinos! were awesome. In the encore they played You! Me! Dancing! <3 Met a cute and interesting guy from Raleigh. We have a lot in common re: music, lol. I saw a bunch of van Goghs and a Leonardo da Vinci today. Also saw the declaration of independence and co (looks nothing like the display in National Treasure, if I remember National Treasure right, LOL). Heading home tomorrow yay.

Omg DC is awesome. I saw the hope diamond and the washington memorial and mummies. I had two drinks and I'm drunk don't drink on an empty stomach folks

It was just the brake pads. They were... very worn in the rear. Woo DC tomorrow so excited! didn't have to skip class btw I'm just good at scheduling/organizing I'm destined to become CTO of some big tech company mark my words I'll be a magnificent CTO the best

Yeah I know no one's going to know the exact cause I was just wondering what general things would cause it I'm pretty sure it's the brakes, it sounds just like when my brother's disc brakes on his bicycle aren't aligned properly, except louder... I'm going to have to skip class and get it looked at after my therapy appointment. RIP.

Car question: There's a periodic scraping noise coming from the front passenger tire. It stops when I apply even a little pressure to the brakes. The sound doesn't change with speed as far as I can tell. It doesn't always make the sounds. The sound is unaffected by turning and doesn't happen if I'm completely stopped. What could it be? I'm driving up to DC Friday and have work / school tomorrow so I'm kinda in a bind regarding getting it checked out. If it helps I recently had the tires replaced.

Add on to that I went to the gym as usual. Also, so, like, I'm going to see Los Campesinos! this Saturday in Washington, DC. LOL I'll be staying Fri-Sun and doing some touring too. Gotta go to a few Smithsonians and see some monuments. ... My yearly "do-something-new-each-month" now looks like: - January: Started school and new job (Staples) - February: Had first drink / went to first bar, got learner's permit - March: Had driving lessons, started ItsyRealm - April: Got license, got car, went to Raleigh / ECGC, started dating, had sex (that was a big month) - May: ...I don't remember. I think I started looking for internships but I'd have to dig through my journal. - June: Got internship at Immersion Media. - July: Went to Charlotte / Carowinds. - August: Got drunk. - September: Started job at Immersion Media. - October: Saw a concert (Florence + The Machine), attended first party (and first time I dressed up for Halloween since a kid) - November (pending): ...hopefully go to DC assuming no NUCLEAR DISASTER or some bullshit - December (pending): Go to Florida to see grandparents I'm the wild B-MACHINE that never stops.

So I scheduled a new appointment with my med management doctor (14 December ugh) and my therapist (Thursday). I'm feeling better (not the terrible crippling depression & sadness, just extreme sadness). But despite it, I got up at 5:00 am, dropped off my doctor's note at my Staples job, scheduled the two appointments, went to school, and went to work... You can be depressed and do nothing, or depressed and do something. I choose to do something. Might as well be productive if I'm going to be down regardless.

... The pub was just the straw that broke the camels back. I'm doing /too much/. I'm under so much stress I'm having a hard time breathing. I'm working two jobs AND going to school full time AND doing freelance work AND working on a game (with the hope it sells well). The game is detrimental because I know it's going to be a flop and everyone's going to hate it when I post the demo. That's nearly a years worth of work going to be wasted. Between work and school I have little freetime, and the freetime I have is spent doing freelance work or game development. I hate my hobbies anymore. I haven't read or played a video game or writtten or drawn for myself and enjoyed it in months. I'm doing too much and I'm going to relapse and lose all the progress I've made. [bleep] off I wasn't. I had to go to CMH Crisis Center today because I was so depressed but "lol i must be drunk" @muggi It's evident I'm unattractive or have other qualities that make me worthless so dating is pointless. I already recommended taking a break from dating for 6-12 months until your gym results start manifesting for this very reason. I don't think you're capable of dating women right now (for various reasons); you're just going to be disappointing and frustrating yourself, which will affect your self-confidence. At least if you take a break from the failures, you'll have time to rekindle some hope for when you try again in better shape I'm always going to have loose skin ergo I'm always going to be unattractive no matter what I do. [bleep] off I wasn't. I had to go to CMH Crisis Center today because I was so depressed but "lol i must be drunk" Sorry. That was insensitive of me. I hope things turn around for you soon, or at least, that you can put the dating problems out of your mind a little. I think I should've committed myself because I feel no better now than I did when I walked in. I went to sleep for 4 hours and swear it's been 12 because I've had over what felt like a dozen vivid horrible dreams already.

[bleep] off I wasn't. I had to go to CMH Crisis Center today because I was so depressed but "lol i must be drunk" @muggi It's evident I'm unattractive or have other qualities that make me worthless so dating is pointless.

Some days I do great, some days I do terrible. I went to a pub with a bunch of coworkers. I tried approaching girls but chickened out. I had probably six shots in 2 hours and felt nothing. (I can stand balanced on one leg. The world isn't wobbly. I'm still freezing.) I approached one girl and the conversation ended quickly. I hate myself but I hate where I live more. I hate myself because I'm not masculine enough nor am I feminine enough (i.e., I'm an unattractive shit stain) and I hate the Fayetteville because [bleep] the military industrial complex, [bleep] patriotism, and [bleep] contractors/corporations that make private money by dealing death.

muggi's advice to me should be the same: https://forum.tip.it/topic/192134-i-want-a-girlfriendboyfriend-and-other-such-relationship-advice/page-975?do=findComment&comment=5602758 In any case I've been going since ... 26 september? So a month later I went to 90 lb squat, 110 lb deadlift, and 60 lb bench press from ~40 lb, ~70 lb, and just barbell (so 20 lb). Next time I go (Monday) I'm going to try and go up 10 lbs since it felt easy today. I can easily move the barbell with one hand, now, too. I go 3x a week. Not always M/T/F, but always 3x a week unless it's like impossible or would interfere with more important things. (For example, last week, I went on a hook-up Friday evening + had work during the day; and Monday I had a 17 hour work/school day). I still managed 2x in that week. For context, I work two jobs, do freelance work, am making my own game, am going to school full time, and have a social life.

22-30. Most guys my type are <21. I'm not messing with that.

I see Muse's lyrics as a rallying point to fight oppression. Off the top of my head: Take a Bow, Assassin, Knights of Cydonia, Butterflies and Hurricanes... When I want to be in "[bleep]-everyone-who-hurt-me-I'll-show-you-up-magnificently"-mode I listen to Godspeed You! Black Emperor, though.

Swans <3

Muse's new album is amazing.