Gender Dysphoria

[Errdoth]

 

Edit: how do you post your gender by your avatar?

 

 

 

Just space it out to a new line, and use an alt code for the symbol.

[heartless619]

 

 

 

There can be good Christian psychologists, don't get me wrong but they absolutely have to follow the code of conduct within the profession and keep to the counselling theories.

 

 

 

These even include behaviouralism, psychodynamic theory and cognitive therapy which are pretty much against their personal religion beliefs.

 

 

 

 

ok please now elaborate..pm me..im a Christian, and im also studing psych, socio, and a interpersonal speech in college..behaviorism isn't against us..

 

just because we study how behavior can effect you psyche..i don't understand how that is against "beliefs" do pm some stuff on this..and get a real answer from a Christian..not what you think we should think..

[PaperClipsYaaaar]

 

 

 

There can be good Christian psychologists, don't get me wrong but they absolutely have to follow the code of conduct within the profession and keep to the counselling theories.

 

 

 

These even include behaviouralism, psychodynamic theory and cognitive therapy which are pretty much against their personal religion beliefs.

 

 

 

 

ok please now elaborate..pm me..im a Christian, and im also studing psych, socio, and a interpersonal speech in college..behaviorism isn't against us..

 

just because we study how behavior can effect you psyche..i don't understand how that is against "beliefs" do pm some stuff on this..and get a real answer from a Christian..not what you think we should think..

 

She's saying that psychologists shouldn't use their personal bias against patients. So a Christian psychologist shouldn't express his personal disapproval of transsexuals if he is counseling a transsexual. This sort of fair, ethical psychologist is obviously not the kind that the OP's mother wants to hire.

[IGoddessI]

Thanks for clearing that up clips, you did a perfect job at explaining it :D

 

 

 

Also, behaviouralism is the science of human and animal behaviour, which can conflict with some religious values.

 

 

 

I'm having a small problem; however, I can't seem to understand how that has confused you? Considering the history of 'isms' is one of the first things you learn in an undergraduate psychology/behavioural science degree?

 

 

 

Another problem IÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢m having is, understanding why a psychology student such as you has not been successful in removing defensiveness in his questioning?

 

 

 

I have completed the degree youÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢re currently undertaking and I wouldnÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢t deliberately go out of my way to diminish anyoneÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢s faith. After all it's up to people like you and I to restore it.

 

 

 

I hope I have cleared any confusion you seem to have had :D And I will certainly make note to state my objections clearly in future, as obviously I seem to have failed to do so.

 

 

 

If you're still confused, I can scan some pages for you out of my old text books.

[rocketman089]

Tough break, man. I hope you discover yourself, or whatever it is you're trying to figure out.

 

 

 

There was this awesome kid named Ralph that I knew throughout high school who was trans gender (that's the term, right?). He actually got beaten to death this summer, which was huge news since he was a pretty popular kid at our school and a nationally ranked dancer or something. It's a tragedy how close-minded people are.

[kelem_ryu]

I do have one thing to say to you though Sep. You're obsessed with your problems, as if you were your own favourite subject. I highly recommend after this post, you stop trying to analyse yourself before you end up with anything else.

 

 

 

 

 

I don't mean to be blunt but when will you stop talking about what you have?

 

 

 

 

 

Hey.. thanks a lot! This really did something for me. ... and please be blunt (or an "emotionless cow" for that matter =P) unless you prefer having an edge. This not-wanting-to-offend-anybody, political correct, always-nice blah blah doesn't help anybody, ever.

 

 

 

I wonder if what you said would qualify as "good psychological practise".

 

 

 

 

 

@TE: I don't feel particularly male myself, but i guess ultimately gender doesn't really matter. There's this distinct advantage of being male though: Most females are attracted to males, not even necessarily to males that live up to the stereotypes. Just look at mangas. There is this popular stream of very girlish guys that's mainly painted by women.

 

 

 

Another thought: Once you are a girl, you still will have been a guy, unlike girls who were born girls. They always were girls. This is something that might bug you someday.

 

 

 

Other then that you have my blessings. I just think it's at least a bit wierd to remove perfectly functional body parts. It's not even a mutation, like a 6th toe or something.

[mad4u689]

That's a really tough thing to be going through, and it makes it ten gazillion times harder to have your parents not really understand quite what is going on, and aren't supportive of your transition :( I'm really sorry that this is going to be so hard for you.

 

 

 

That said, (and I'm sure you know this), it will work out. Transitioning can be really really tough, and there are still so many barriers to go through. For example, if you're interested in any sports, you might not be allowed on sports teams (either male or female) if you are taking hormones. There's still a lot of discrimination out there based on the perception of the gender binary :(

 

 

 

I'm certainly no expert, but if you ever just want to talk about it, feel free to message me (or IM me on AIM at madjoyish ):) I've known people all across the gender spectrum - genderqueer, transgender, transsexual - and though I don't know firsthand how tough it can be, I know it's helpful to have someone just to listen to.

 

 

 

P.S. If you feel like you want to transition physically, don't let your parents or a biased "psychologist" stop you. It sounds like you've done a lot of research on your own, and that's great :D

[TotalTalker]

Its a big change if you ask me. Are you sure you'd want to go through all of it?

[megakiller32]

Thats a tricky situation.

 

I personally hate overly pedantic stereotype Christian people.

 

Are they like Ned Flanders, or Worse?

[heartless619]

 

 

 

1.Also, behaviouralism is the science of human and animal behaviour, which can conflict with some religious values.

 

 

 

2.I'm having a small problem; however, I can't seem to understand how that has confused you? Considering the history of 'isms' is one of the first things you learn in an undergraduate psychology/behavioural science degree?

 

 

 

3.Another problem IÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢m having is, understanding why a psychology student such as you has not been successful in removing defensiveness in his questioning?

 

 

 

If you're still confused, I can scan some pages for you out of my old text books.

 

 

 

ok on point 1. can i get an example?

 

 

 

2.Funcitonalism, behaveoralism, Psychoanalytic, structuralism

 

as i am still somewhat new to this field of study i guess either my brain or your wording i was just getting a bit confused.

 

 

 

3. eh, what? im still fairly new to this whole field of study, only having taken a semester of both psych, and socio in HS and going through my first quarter..

 

 

 

and just as above something i deleted..about the biases i'm fairly certain i wouldnt use any bias i have but yet try to understand that person and see were they are coming from and pretty much do what were supposed to do..regardless of anything i might have against homosexuality or anything else..thats how they were born/made and thats fine..

 

 

 

That is just my personal beliefs and how i would/will act to a patience..some Christian Psychs i guess are judgmental but what can you do..hope people don't go to them..? (none Rhetorical)

[The Dark Lord]

That's a really tough thing to be going through, and it makes it ten gazillion times harder to have your parents not really understand quite what is going on, and aren't supportive of your transition :( I'm really sorry that this is going to be so hard for you.

 

 

 

That said, (and I'm sure you know this), it will work out. Transitioning can be really really tough, and there are still so many barriers to go through. For example, if you're interested in any sports, you might not be allowed on sports teams (either male or female) if you are taking hormones. There's still a lot of discrimination out there based on the perception of the gender binary :(

 

 

 

I'm certainly no expert, but if you ever just want to talk about it, feel free to message me (or IM me on AIM at madjoyish ):) I've known people all across the gender spectrum - genderqueer, transgender, transsexual - and though I don't know firsthand how tough it can be, I know it's helpful to have someone just to listen to.

 

 

 

P.S. If you feel like you want to transition physically, don't let your parents or a biased "psychologist" stop you. It sounds like you've done a lot of research on your own, and that's great :D

 

 

 

Thanks. :) I'm worried that I'll end up making a mistake by getting SRS and hormone replacement therapy (trans), but I'm sure about my feelings. I'm just afraid that I'll transition physically and then get labeled a "freak" and I won't be able to have a love life.

 

 

 

I also live in a small town in the South. It's not a very good environment for a transgender to be in. I'm literally afraid that some redneck would try to kill me if the information was leaked. Right now, they just know that I'm effeminate and they make fun of me.

 

 

 

My secular psychologist told me that he can't find a youth organization for transgenders in our area. He's still trying to find one for me though.

[darkmage099]

LOL

 

 

 

Come on man! I used to talk to you on MSN all the time. I'm %100 positive that this is just a phase. Two months ago you just thought your personality was messed up. You seemed totally dude-like just a little confused. In my opinion, it's just a phase. This cant have suddenly happened...

 

 

 

By the way, that quiz is probably what did it. Dont believe that garbage! It's okay to be metrosexual (even transexual), but I honestly dont think you are transexual; just a little feminine (taking it too far).

[The Dark Lord]

I was "dude-like" during the time that you've known me because of my male persona that I created years ago. (Most transsexuals create one in order to "fit in." Many, such as myself, are sick and tired of pretending to be someone we're not, so we attempt to transition.)

 

 

 

I've always perceived myself to be a girl. Even my mental voice is female.

 

 

 

I took that BBC "brain gender" test for fun by the way. O:)

 

 

 

I mostly studied gender identity to be honest.

[IGoddessI]

ok on point 1. can i get an example?

 

 

 

You can find this by going to your library and finding "Theories of counselling and psychotherapy" by James Archer Jr. & Christopher J. Mc Carthy. I highly recommend it for your studies.

 

 

 

Referring to counselling itself (without applying behaviourism)

 

 

 

In the 1960's and 1970's Carl Rogers (I'm sure you would have heard of him) built much of his approach to counselling on what he called "core conditions"

 

 

 

The following therapeutic scale was listed by Gaston (1990)

 

 

 

a) the client's affective relationship to the therapist.

 

B) The client's capacity to work purposefully in therapy.

 

c) The therapist's empathic understanding and involvement

 

d) The client-therapist agreement on the goals and tasks of therapy

 

 

 

With Sep's condition not all Christians (and other religions) are going to be able to successfully apply this. Referring to my earlier statement once more

which can conflict with some religious values.

 

 

 

Now applying behaviourism:

 

 

 

A Christian psychologist working with behaviourism would most likely state that Sep's condition is a result of his interaction with his current environment.

 

 

 

He would argue classical conditioning: E.g. "Sep has been reading up on so much transgender material that he has conditioned himself to have this condition"

 

 

 

He would argue operant conditioning: E.g. "Sep has been acting this particular way as he notices he gets more attention from people. He must lack attention in his life and therefore acting like a transgender is rewarding for him while being straight people were generally ignoring him."

 

 

 

This may very well be the case but if it's not, then what does a Christian psychologist have to offer through behaviourism?

 

 

 

Referring to the aforementioned counselling core conditions, Sep is unlikely (if the Christian psychologist is unsuccessful) to build any core conditions with his therapist, feel that he simply does not understand and the therapy sessions cease.

 

 

 

This is an example you've asked for, referring to my following statement

which can conflict with some religious values.

 

 

 

Key word being "can", not always.

 

 

 

some Christian Psychs i guess are judgmental but what can you do

 

 

 

You've said it yourself, although asked me for evidence... hehe fascinating.

[Chelseaboy11_Is_Tom]

lol your wrong man, if you believe in god, you would know that he made you a boy for a reason... eww...eww...

 

 

 

btw dont get surgery or ull look like pete burns:

 

 

 

 

 

[heartless619]

 

A Christian psychologist working with behaviourism would most likely state that Sep's condition is a result of his interaction with his current environment.

 

 

 

He would argue classical conditioning: E.g. "Sep has been reading up on so much transgender material that he has conditioned himself to have this condition"

 

 

 

He would argue operant conditioning: E.g. "Sep has been acting this particular way as he notices he gets more attention from people. He must lack attention in his life and therefore acting like a transgender is rewarding for him while being straight people were generally ignoring him."

 

 

 

This may very well be the case but if it's not, then what does a Christian psychologist have to offer through behaviourism?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

some Christian Psychs i guess are judgmental but what can you do

 

 

 

You've said it yourself, although asked me for evidence... hehe fascinating.

 

 

 

rofl what idiot psych would say that...if you cant deny the fact he was born with both male and female parts..you don't just grow them as you please and then blame it on your surroundings..

 

i don't think well actually i do think some human was idiotic enough to say that...tell me if im wrong in what i just said..

 

 

 

lol so a Christian psych would say..that if i started reading alot of stuff on trans gender and stuff alike..that eventually in my state of mind i would become one? but yet have no female parts...and i was thinking i was a trans gender? that just doesn't compute with logic..

 

 

 

i agree on the last part..acting a certain way to get attention..but there is a fine line between acting and having. well good think i wont let my religious beliefs get in the way of logic and reasoning.

 

 

 

EDIT: ok uh i had forgot he wasn't born with parts he just feels it...so everything i just said above..is kind of irrelevant. but yea..

 

well..im not really sure at this point.

[Satenza]

He doesn't have any "female parts" if you exclude him thinking he has a "female brain".

[IGoddessI]

heartless619, *deep sigh* go back to your undergraduate degree. You're not even through your first quarter and already telling other people how to apply psychotherapy and how much you ÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ãâ¦Ã¢â¬ÅknowÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬ÃâÃ

[Powman3]

Dude, you can be whatever you want, that includes gender. If you don't feel comfortable doing normal male thingsd, just don't do it. And there's no reason not to be happy, not at all. I just think you're going through emotional distress, that's all.

 

 

 

I'm sorry if that seems crude or offensive, I'm not good at consoling people :cry:

[The Dark Lord]

My mom confronted me earlier this morning and forced me to show her my legs. When she saw that they were shaved, she became angry.

 

 

 

My parents are FORCING me to look like a male. They are destroying me.

 

 

 

My head feels like someone is squeezing it. I think I'm having an anxiety attack. It's horrible.

[Errdoth]

My mom confronted me earlier this morning and forced me to show her my legs. When she saw that they were shaved, she became angry.

 

 

 

My parents are FORCING me to look like a male. They are destroying me.

 

 

 

My head feels like someone is squeezing it. I think I'm having an anxiety attack. It's horrible.

 

 

 

 

 

*Starts spewing out random scenarios*

 

I read this in a book once:

 

 

 

Try to start a nice debate, and when it turns to yelling, say something like "I can't continue living like this, if you can't accept me for me, I'm better off without you," then go to your room, shut the door, and pretend to sleep. Then, later at night, write a pithy little note, like "It's your turn to choose. " and go stay at a close friends/cousins/whoevers place until they call you.

 

 

 

*/random scenario*

 

 

 

It worked fine for the protagonist. :D

 

(What I'm getting at, is that you might try to set up something, in where they are forced to choose, whether they're going to accept you for who you are, or not)

[darkforaster]

Although i believe what the parents are doing to you is bad, and is mentally unhealthy for you. I can understand where their coming from. If i ever had a son who was similiar to you, I know i wouldn't be pleased.

 

 

 

And i know your in discomfort, but if you put yourself in thier situation you should realise that it isn't very easy for them either. They could be embarressed for example, if friends of theirs found out they may be slightly looked down apon. They may feel uncomfortable with this as well.

 

 

 

their just in denial. Until they accept it, I'm afraid you'll have to grin and bear it.

 

 

 

I'm no pshycologist but, rebelling isn't what you should be doing. That'll make your parents angry at you and angry at themselves for you ending up the way you are today. That will obviously make them unhappy and soon you'll end up with more distraught parents.

 

 

 

It may drive them to thier brink if they fail to accept it. If it really goes bad they could start taking drugs, alcohole or perhaps futher and worse.

 

 

 

If you are 100% positive you hate being a boy (which i obviously won't understand in all my life) then good luck. But in order for others to accept you, you first must accept yourself. This is where people like you struggle - the whole idea of this is to not accept yourself. It must be terribly difficult for you because of this.

 

 

 

Hang in there, as Brian would say "Always look on the bright side of life."

[darkforaster]

My mom confronted me earlier this morning and forced me to show her my legs. When she saw that they were shaved, she became angry.

 

 

 

My parents are FORCING me to look like a male. They are destroying me.

 

 

 

My head feels like someone is squeezing it. I think I'm having an anxiety attack. It's horrible.

 

 

 

 

 

*Starts spewing out random scenarios*

 

I read this in a book once:

 

 

 

Try to start a nice debate, and when it turns to yelling, say something like "I can't continue living like this, if you can't accept me for me, I'm better off without you," then go to your room, shut the door, and pretend to sleep. Then, later at night, write a pithy little note, like "It's your turn to choose. " and go stay at a close friends/cousins/whoevers place until they call you.

 

 

 

*/random scenario*

 

 

 

It worked fine for the protagonist. :D

 

(What I'm getting at, is that you might try to set up something, in where they are forced to choose, whether they're going to accept you for who you are, or not)

 

 

 

I have absolutely no idea how this would help serephurus.

 

 

 

you cannot force someone to accept you. They might say they do, but in thier hearts they won't. Seeing that in someone's eyes is painful.

 

 

 

That scenario would just make things worse.

 

 

 

Edit: I see, well make sure you think things through before posting. this prevents an unneeded argument (like mine) from happening.

[llamster]

I notice that it says under your name that you are a girl...

 

 

 

I think it's wrong that your parents are being so forceful about this. However,

 

I think it's best that you try not to upset them, this issue is already putting a lot of stress on them.

[Errdoth]

 

I have absolutely no idea how this would help serephurus.

 

 

 

 

Me neither, but it was in a book I just finished my book report on. So...err...yeah...