Kwisatz Posted April 7, 2006 Share Posted April 7, 2006 Alright, as a disclaimer: I AM asking for dating advice on a forum from people I do not know. I DO have friends to ask, but they will probably tell somebody. I DO have parents to ask, but they fail to realize how things have changed. I am NOT an idiot. **EDIT: Read my recent post because that's what I'm concerned about at the moment. Sadly I think Death by Pod was right. Anyway, I was speaking with one of my friends-of-a-friend on AIM, and they casually introduced into conversation that their current partner is a bad boyfriend. I then said that I was probably worse, and she said that she would consider going out with me if... 1)i knew you felt the same way and 2) if i wasnt going out with [guy] Now, three days later... im breaking up with [guy] I really wouldn't mind going out with this person at all :D. But I need to know a few things first: What is the grace period that I have to wait so that her ex doesn't get mad at me for asking her out? I don't really know her now-ex too well, and we haven't spoken for around... 6 years now. It will probably even be a while before he finds out that I go out with her, if I do. Is it alright to date an acquaintance? As in, a friend of a friend. We've spoken a few times and get along pretty well together but we're not real close or anything. Thanks :). Please don't needlessly flame me. As of yet I haven't flamed anybody who's asked for advice on this kind of thing (yes, I checked), and I would appreciate it if the favor was returned. But if you have some kind of valid constructive criticism then by all means post it, no matter how harsh. handed me TWO tissues to clear up. I was like "i'm going to need a few more paper towels than that luv" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
insane Posted April 7, 2006 Share Posted April 7, 2006 If I didn't know her ex really anymore, then I wouldn't really bother waiting at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Google90 Posted April 7, 2006 Share Posted April 7, 2006 Look at my post..just below you... :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubsa Posted April 7, 2006 Share Posted April 7, 2006 Yup, no time like the present. To be honest, it's more her decision when to date you when she's comfortable after her break-up. But there should be nothing to stop you from asking. Good luck with it by the way! :D This is how much you all raised for charity. Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knives669 Posted April 7, 2006 Share Posted April 7, 2006 I wouldn't wait at all. :wink: Especially if you don't know the guy. However, I would take a little time to get to know her. It can't hurt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anesthesia Posted April 7, 2006 Share Posted April 7, 2006 I think if you get to know her a bit better before 'dating' then you have more of a shot at having a decent relationship. Some people are changed by being a moderator. I wouldn't be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Globez Posted April 8, 2006 Share Posted April 8, 2006 I would get to know her for a while. Not just to well, get to know her better but to also give her some time to really get over the ex. Nothing worse than being used as a rebound, especially if you're actually into the girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knives669 Posted April 8, 2006 Share Posted April 8, 2006 I would get to know her for a while. Not just to well, get to know her better but to also give her some time to really get over the ex. Nothing worse than being used as a rebound, especially if you're actually into the girl. Exactly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unFaith Posted April 9, 2006 Share Posted April 9, 2006 Rebound relationships aren't half bad. Sometimes the girls are pretty fiesty as a result. haha I say smooth sailin' for ya. And all this advice about getting to know her first, just fool around and get comfortable, that's the most important thing. You guys will get to know eachother and come close to love best if you just let it happen eventually after foolin' around and buildin' a good physical relationship IMO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Death_By_Pod Posted April 9, 2006 Share Posted April 9, 2006 If she's willing to leave for something better, then there will come a time when she leaves you for something better. ThatÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢s not to say donÃÆââââ¬Å¡Ã¬Ã¢ââ¬Å¾Ã¢t date her, just keep this in mind when making up your mind and evaluating her character. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jorick Posted April 9, 2006 Share Posted April 9, 2006 first just built up a friendship, after 2-3 weeks, ask her out my runescape stats:http://w3t.org/u/q74 Let's you if you can beat that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hypnotic_tapeworm Posted April 9, 2006 Share Posted April 9, 2006 If I didn't know her ex really anymore, then I wouldn't really bother waiting at all. amen... "grace periods" are only for if you know the person, and if it was a mate then you shouldnt get with her full stop, but you dont even know him so, well you and him aint friends with him anymore so just ask her man :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kwisatz Posted April 20, 2006 Author Share Posted April 20, 2006 Apologies for bumping, but I'd like to thank everyone who gave me advice rather than flaming me, as so often happens on this subject. :) Topics like this make me happy I'm a member of tip.it (and others the opposite). handed me TWO tissues to clear up. I was like "i'm going to need a few more paper towels than that luv" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kwisatz Posted May 16, 2006 Author Share Posted May 16, 2006 Alright, apologies for the bump and now I need more advice. Well, we went out to the movies on Friday (today is Mon the 15th). I was sick and as such did not go to school today. What happened was, everything seemed to go smooth on the date, but now she posted on her myspace that it was "disgusting" and that I grabbed her in an inappropriate place. I was also blocked on AIM and then blocked again after I got on another SN to try and talk about this. Now, I don't so much care about the disgusting part but I didn't molest her or break any laws at all. What me and four other people I know are trying to figure out is how/why she is lying or is mistaken about me fondling her. Words do far more damage than one may think, and now two people whom I have never even met at all think I'm a pervert. What I am afraid of is getting a false reputation or, even worse, having charges pressed against me for something I didn't even do. As of yet I've tried to talk to her but I've been blocked and then SMS'd (and referenced in the third person about how I'm "pissed" at her). So yeah. What exactly am I supposed to do in a situation like this? I don't really give a rat's wagon about the relationship; what I'm most concerned about is being labeled a rapist. Any ideas? Should I tell an adult, her parents, etc.? handed me TWO tissues to clear up. I was like "i'm going to need a few more paper towels than that luv" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
insane Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 If you touched her anywhere at all (shoulder, waist, hand), and it was not invited - she could have taken it the wrong way. Remember, women are more sensitive to things like this than guys are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knives669 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Oh my god. Wow.... You should really try to talk to her about it, or her friends. She may be saying that kind of stuff because there's another guy involved. Maybe she's trying to get attention or pity. Either way, this is a lousy way to do it. You certainly need to speak to an adult about it. Your parents first, then her parents. You need to make it known right away that you did no such thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nvw08 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 I wouldn't do anything, as long as you can say you did nothing and mean that 100% your good. If it tarnishes your image that bad, then you need new friends seeing as someone such as herself, having just broken up with a bf, accusing you of something that inhumane (eg. molesting her basically), and then believeing her instead of you means they truly don't value you as a friend... And you might want to drop her also :wink: Droolman's item Guide | My RuneScape pictures | My barrows videos, with download link!Free Image Hosting! | Free File Hosting! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knives669 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Agreed. Drop this girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kwisatz Posted May 16, 2006 Author Share Posted May 16, 2006 I wouldn't do anything, as long as you can say you did nothing and mean that 100% your good. If it tarnishes your image that bad, then you need new friends seeing as someone such as herself, having just broken up with a bf, accusing you of something that inhumane (eg. molesting her basically), and then believeing her instead of you means they truly don't value you as a friend... And you might want to drop her also :wink: Naw, my friends believe me, but the only ones I've talked to as of yet are guys. I need a non gender-oriented opinion. That aside the people who called me perv don't even know me and have never met me. Yeah, I'm trying to think about how I'm going to break this news to my folks. They will probably be pretty damn pissed at me. handed me TWO tissues to clear up. I was like "i'm going to need a few more paper towels than that luv" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nvw08 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Ahh.. ok, as long as your parents trust you, there should be no problem in explaining what happened. Also; there will always be people on her side just because they want to kiss up to her for personal gain. But as long as your friends believe you then there's nothing bad that can happen in the grand scheme of things... just always stay calm and explain to everyone that gets mad at you. and if they don't believe you then that's their problem not yours, some people will always be stubborn there's nothing you can do about that. Droolman's item Guide | My RuneScape pictures | My barrows videos, with download link!Free Image Hosting! | Free File Hosting! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knives669 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Your parents won't be mad if they trust you. I'm sure they'll be able to help you more than anyone here can. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nvw08 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 ^^ then we agree ^_^ Droolman's item Guide | My RuneScape pictures | My barrows videos, with download link!Free Image Hosting! | Free File Hosting! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darkmage099 Posted May 20, 2006 Share Posted May 20, 2006 If you want to get serious like an actual relationship then id listen to the other guys but if youre looking for you know a relationship just for fun (i hope you know what imean) then go for it you have nothing to lose really. It sounds like you have good friends. Trix.--quit WoW as of 12/07Thank you 4be2jue for the wonderful sig and avatar! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pennywise Posted May 20, 2006 Share Posted May 20, 2006 If you want to get serious like an actual relationship then id listen to the other guys but if youre looking for you know a relationship just for fun (i hope you know what imean) then go for it you have nothing to lose really. It sounds like you have good friends. Dude...he doesn't need advice on that anymore. Eight Bananas, MD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katha610 Posted May 20, 2006 Share Posted May 20, 2006 manamana......... she accuses you... well if you decide to talk to her, talk to her n person talk to her in a public place where none of her friends are with her, think about what you are going to say and don't just run into it and yell at her and so on. talk to your last girlfriend, what she thinks about that and if she ever felt like that at the beginning of your relationship, etc. i don't think that she will prss charges against you, that would be rediculous and immature, IF you did not anything that would be considered inappropriate... and if you are in high school... proove your point and just get over it. it's high school Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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