Over the past few weeks i've been seeing that most people who post about their problems (mostly girl ones) get helpful advice. Well my problem is a little different, I need advice on how to be Social :oops:. Like, I know a ton of people but I never have any "real" conversations with them. Here, i'll give you guys an example of my conversation with a girl I sat beside during Lunch:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Girl: Hey

 

 

 

Me: Hey

 

 

 

Girl: What's new ?

 

 

 

Me: Nothing really, how about you ?

 

 

 

Girl: Nothing at all

 

 

 

Me: Oh ... Cool ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then right about there I didn't know what else to say. And other times when other people come up to me and say like " You're so cool " because my cousin is kinda popular so almost everyone in the school knows me, All I do is laugh or say thanks or something. It's starting to really bug me, Can you fellow tipiter's help me out, please :mrgreen:.

Try and widen what you talk about. Favourite music, films, author, that kind of thing. Invite people round, get talking about new things, go to parties, that kind of thing. Just enjoy yourself.

Ask them an question that is most likely going to be answered with something other than "no". Like....stuff about school and sports. Talk about something they're interested in.

hey - it shouldnt be that hard.. just think of a topic you like and start talking.

 

 

 

If they're your friends you should share some common interests and be able to hold a conversation for a while..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

for instance!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hey - ur avatar is the album cover of the first album of iron maiden! Cool! have u heard the new album from them yet?

hey - it shouldnt be that hard.. just think of a topic you like and start talking.

 

 

 

If they're your friends you should share some common interests and be able to hold a conversation for a while..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

for instance!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hey - ur avatar is eddy frm iron maiden! Cool! have u heard the new album from them yet?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Actually, it's kinda hard for me. I'm a shy person and usually choke up on words when i'm talking.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By the way, no I haven't heard their album yet, Planning to buy their Stuff after my birthday money, hehe. :thumbsup:

People can mention a lot of subjects for you to talk about, but that won't really help probably. I can relate to you though. I'm very social, but I can understand where you are coming from when it comes to certain people. To be honest with you, I find the "popular" kids aren't really that interesting to talk to. On the outside they look fun to be with and stuff, but when I actually have a conversation with them, most are pretty boring and are bad conversationists.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that maybe the people you are talking to just aren't that interesting deeper down. Just show that you are genuinely interested in people when you talk to them, and ask them how they're really doing. Some people(usually the people that are better to have conversations with) will see that you're being genuine and might even start to open up to you.

I have the same problem. Not with guys those, but girls. When a girl comes and says high to me, even if i do not like her AT ALL. I get like all sweaty in the palms and my face turns red. Im getting better now i guess, school is the worst for talking to people though, and public places. But if your outside, its easy

ask her telephone number..

 

 

 

then you call her 500 times..but when she takes it you hang again..

 

 

 

after that you go to her and you say: omg i got someone who calls me 500 times aday..

 

 

 

she will say..wow i got that to!! then you ask : cool shall we try to find the person and bring him to the police?

 

 

 

she will go with you..you will never find the person (because you are it).

 

 

 

so you will be searching the person forever..so you are together...FOREVER :o

ask her telephone number..

 

 

 

then you call her 500 times..but when she takes it you hang again..

 

 

 

after that you go to her and you say: omg i got someone who calls me 500 times aday..

 

 

 

she will say..wow i got that to!! then you ask : cool shall we try to find the person and bring him to the police?

 

 

 

she will go with you..you will never find the person (because you are it).

 

 

 

so you will be searching the person forever..so you are together...FOREVER :o

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nice .. Ugh ... Idea ? very original =D> i'll make that plan Z if all fails .. :-s

 

ask her telephone number..

 

 

 

then you call her 500 times..but when she takes it you hang again..

 

 

 

after that you go to her and you say: omg i got someone who calls me 500 times aday..

 

 

 

she will say..wow i got that to!! then you ask : cool shall we try to find the person and bring him to the police?

 

 

 

she will go with you..you will never find the person (because you are it).

 

 

 

so you will be searching the person forever..so you are together...FOREVER :o

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nice .. Ugh ... Idea ? very original =D> i'll make that plan Z if all fails .. :-s

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

i can make up 25 other stories..

 

 

 

ill start tomorrow..going to sleep now..(dutch) bye :)

social?

 

 

 

just chat.

 

 

 

ask people about their interests.

 

 

 

expand on it.

 

 

 

tell stories from your past.

 

 

 

that's all I ever do!

Stories about your past are a good thing for you to talk about, just don't offer them without prompting. For example, if you are talking about music with someone, tell a story about a concert you went to. If you are like me, and never been to a concert, that can be a good story in itself, if you swing it the right way.

hey - it shouldnt be that hard.. just think of a topic you like and start talking.

 

 

 

If they're your friends you should share some common interests and be able to hold a conversation for a while..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

for instance!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hey - ur avatar is the album cover of the first album of iron maiden! Cool! have u heard the new album from them yet?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thats actually a very good idea...

i have the same problem as you imperial... i usually try to say funny stuff and such, i usually can make my friends laugh (through randomness and stupidity :-$ ) but i dunno... you might not wanna try that... it can be very aquard (more aquard than the silence before) if you make a joke and no one laughs :ohnoes:

How old are you?

 

 

 

I suppose you have two moments in your life to get social: before 8 years old and close to the end of puberty (15+). All the people I know were either social as little kids or became after they got through puberty. I guess after puberty it just gets easier for people to talk.

 

 

 

Also, are you an only child?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you have nothing to talk about, start listening to some more music, read some magazines, watch tv shows many people watch, inform yourself. You'll have something to talk about.

 

 

 

Complaining about teachers also works wonders.

Start sentences with "what do you think about..."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Everyone has opinions :)

If necessary, use your lack of things to say as a talking point, or as the start of a new topic. Conversations often continue longer if both people know that the other actually wants to be talking; saying something to the effect of "I'd like to keep talking but can't think of anything" will show that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'd talk about something which was nearby (in the sense of either being physically close, or a recent issue*). Anything to get even a short conversation started, which can easilly lead to a longer one as it will jog memories.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*I don't mean issue like "abortion" or "terrorism" -- I mean something like (if you are at school) the level of homework, or something.

Just ask them something about themselves ie. "So what subjects do you do?" and they should reply with "maths..... how about you?" Just continue on from there. My school is small, i tend to get along more with the social people rather than the offset groups that stick to themselves. Try to be more active and happy rather than quiet and reserved.

How old are you?

 

 

 

I suppose you have two moments in your life to get social: before 8 years old and close to the end of puberty (15+). All the people I know were either social as little kids or became after they got through puberty. I guess after puberty it just gets easier for people to talk.

 

 

 

Also, are you an only child?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you have nothing to talk about, start listening to some more music, read some magazines, watch tv shows many people watch, inform yourself. You'll have something to talk about.

 

 

 

Complaining about teachers also works wonders.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'm turning 14 next week and I have one sister. I'm also in the 9th grade. And on my spare time I pretty much listen to music ... So I can't listen to music more :lol: I hardly watch tv or read magazines so I could try those, thanks.

Get involved in sport. Join a club or gym or team and make friends there. At 14, a rugby or football team would be a good place to start. Even if you are no good to begin with, you will get much better very quickly.

 

 

 

You could also join a youth club which will let you socialise in a relaxed and mainly un-restricted environment.

 

ask her telephone number..

 

 

 

then you call her 500 times..but when she takes it you hang again..

 

 

 

after that you go to her and you say: omg i got someone who calls me 500 times aday..

 

 

 

she will say..wow i got that to!! then you ask : cool shall we try to find the person and bring him to the police?

 

 

 

she will go with you..you will never find the person (because you are it).

 

 

 

so you will be searching the person forever..so you are together...FOREVER :o

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nice .. Ugh ... Idea ? very original =D> i'll make that plan Z if all fails .. :-s

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Make sure its definatly if ALL fails.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

=P

Try to talk about people about what they like.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Your example given,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

you could have continued with:So what class you in?Do you also have HIM/HER for a teacher,he sucks doesnt he?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and stuff like that

Try to talk about people about what they like.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Your example given,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

you could have continued with:So what class you in?Do you also have HIM/HER for a teacher,he sucks doesnt he?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and stuff like that

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then he pops up behind your backs and gives you both detention, and she'll hate you for the rest of her life AND you have to sit in a room for 2 hours. And her friends will probably smack you in the face with a plastic purse, which will make your face swollen, which makes your chances of getting a new girlfriend even lower, and you'll just lose money on buying anti-depressants. Think before you act.

Invite conversation. Like this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Girl: Hey

 

 

 

Me: Hey

 

 

 

Girl: What's new ?

 

 

 

Me: Nothing really, how about you ?

 

 

 

Girl: Nothing at all

 

 

 

Me: Oh, cool... So did you watch 'I am your mother' last night on Channel Four?

 

 

 

Girl: Yeah! I saw that, it was really intresting, did you like it too?

 

 

 

...Blah Blah...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Btw, I just made up that show name, no such thing

I had that problem once, I was in an all boys school, and had trouble warming up to girls.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nowadays, I have more female friends than I do guys. :P

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It's actually not that bad once you warm up to talking to them. You'll start getting pretty comfortable around them once you talk to them once or twice. Just start a conversation with them, something which doesn't involve a yes or no answer.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Maybe a discussion or something, it's pretty easy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Or if you're lucky, they can start the conversation with you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I had this memorable time, where a girl just came up to me and asked "Do you have a girlfriend?".