Personally, I always found it kind of funny when an ex raged on me and/or the new girl I was dating. Mostly because a lot of them (pretty much all of them actually) broke up with me. They didn't want to be with me, but apparently didn't want anyone else being with me either. I always figured it was just a girl thing, it never occurred to me that it was biological.

Personally, I always found it kind of funny when an ex raged on me and/or the new girl I was dating. Mostly because a lot of them (pretty much all of them actually) broke up with me. They didn't want to be with me, but apparently didn't want anyone else being with me either. I always figured it was just a girl thing, it never occurred to me that it was biological.

 

That's because it's not. :-$

Bold claim.

I dunno I just figured I'd neutralise one random dude's statement on the internet with another.

Also, regarding nwp's dog:

I don't think it's meant to be interpreted the way you read it, because slut shaming against men is neither intensive nor extensive enough to warrant it.

Well I've read a lot of NWP's posts in the past, I'm pretty sure he's alluding to the fact that the less promiscuous a girl is, the more likely she is to file a false rape accusation in order to preserve her image when her slut-shaming friends shame her for having a one night stand.

 

(He's a lawyer that deals with cases like that I believe).

 

But hey, if the ambiguity is killing you that much, why don't ya just ask him? :D

"it's biology'

"no"

 

:twss:

 

I'm willing to bet there is some sort of female biological conditioning prompting them to be jealous of girls being with their former mates. Of course, being a guy with a similar reaction, it's just as fair to claim it's the ideology that's been ingrained in human social acceptability for the past...oh I dunno...few dozen generations? Real tough to separate nature from nurture ever since sociological philosophy started gaining a footing in the scientific world.

 

I'd wager people feel jealous because they feel obsolete and unwanted which combines the effects of biological reasoning and social grooming. We don't want to feel that way because for the good of the species - we shouldn't.

That's because it's not. :-$

 

http://en.wikipedia..../Price_equation

 

This is an equation describing a complex behavior in this case altruism being genetic in origin. My thought is, if a behavior as complex as altruism is genetic in origin maybe a lot more behaviors we have are as well. I think female to female attacks on their integrity as a means of intrasexual competition is real, and I think that slut shaming is one of those tactics. This ties into paternal uncertainty and why men don't want to commit to a woman percieved to be untrustworthy and how beneficial it is for a women to character assault a competing woman using some scenario like "Katie has sex with lots of guys, therefore how do you know she won't cheat on you or give you an STD, however I'm different and you don't have to worry about that with me". To what extent is this behavior genetic in origin I do not know, it is only my suspicion that it is.

 

Lets say that I am right about it being genetic in origin, I would expect female to female character assaulting based on sexual promiscuity to exist across all cultures and in all times to some degree much like altruism has regardless of the sexual norms of the society, whether your in a polyamorous tribal environment or a highly monoganous farming community.

Jealously has evolutionary origins for both men and women...

I seriously don't get too promiscuous girls. Why? Why? Sex isn't that good and at least SOME consistency should be held. Not having gone through 100 boys before entering high-school...

At least I am old-fashioned and think it isn't appropriate still, specially if the girl is younger, like under 18.

Seriously, I know girls who were sexually active since age 12... That is way too early.

 

And I am one to slut-shame. Probably since I haven't seen a single intelligent girl that promiscuous that I would call her a slut.

rah rah stop liking what I don't like

What might work for you might not be ideal for everyone else. You'd probably agree no one should shame you for getting drunk (heck, blackout wasted) at parties, so please keep your subjective values to yourself.

Well, getting blackout drunk is just flat-out irresponsible. Having lots of sex with many different partners, not necessarily so.

I seriously don't get too promiscuous girls. Why? Why? Sex isn't that good and at least SOME consistency should be held. Not having gone through 100 boys before entering high-school...

At least I am old-fashioned and think it isn't appropriate still, specially if the girl is younger, like under 18.

Seriously, I know girls who were sexually active since age 12... That is way too early.

 

And I am one to slut-shame. Probably since I haven't seen a single intelligent girl that promiscuous that I would call her a slut.

 

Well you should probably consider the myriad circumstances that could have put a person in that position, home life, cultural stuff, lack of education, etc. Saying stuff like that without acknowledging the factors does not make you look very good. Esp. when most countries agree that underage people lack sufficient maturity/forethought to be prosecuted. I imagine shit like this falls under similar circumstances.

Well, getting blackout drunk is just flat-out irresponsible. Having lots of sex with many different partners, not necessarily so.

 

that knee jerk reaction comes from the forces I listed earlier. Until modern times sex with lots of partners WAS irresponsible prior to modern birth control because of the enormous chance of pregnancy at each given time you had sex and the uncertainty of who the father was and then the very real issue of who ought to feed this kid comes up and can be difficult for a society to deal with. Now I recognize that this doesn't apply as much anymore but somewhere deep in our reptile brains we still associate sex with pregnancy on some level.

 

I personally don't slut shame, in fact I welcome promiscuity however I don't hold it against people who do for reasons previously stated.

I am not one to call someone a slut easily. Heck, out of the hundreds of people I know, I can only name 2-3.

And I think I may have misunderstood the term slut-shaming a bit.

And well, as a society we Estonians are a lot colder and more closed one. We generally frown on too much promiscuity. Couple relations still have somewhat of a meaning in the society and one-night stands are something that happen rarely. And I do know 3 underage mums now, and I wouldn't call any of them a slut...

 

And I have only gotten totally irresponsibly drunk twice in my life. Years ago. Other times I have been the one to watch after others, even though I myself am totally wasted aswell. Somehow I can manage to keep myself clear enough to never hurt anyone or do anything stupid besides paying all the cab fares or posting online.

Somewhere deep in our brains? The primary purpose of sex is reproduction, I don't think one need look into it very far to see that...

I am not one to call someone a slut easily. Heck, out of the hundreds of people I know, I can only name 2-3.

And I think I may have misunderstood the term slut-shaming a bit.

And well, as a society we Estonians are a lot colder and more closed one. We generally frown on too much promiscuity. Couple relations still have somewhat of a meaning in the society and one-night stands are something that happen rarely. And I do know 3 underage mums now, and I wouldn't call any of them a slut...

 

And I have only gotten totally irresponsibly drunk twice in my life. Years ago. Other times I have been the one to watch after others, even though I myself am totally wasted aswell. Somehow I can manage to keep myself clear enough to never hurt anyone or do anything stupid besides paying all the cab fares or posting online.

That's not what I meant. Some people frown upon drinking because they think people shouldn't drink (they even had it banned for a while here), in the same way you think people shouldn't have too much sex.

Curious that you think a 13 year old would be "sluttier" for doing exactly what an 18 year old would do. People don't all develop at the same rate. To quantify such a number of growth ratios would strip humanity of any potential for individuality. We are all equal, independent and unique creatures. So what if a 13 year old is banging every guy on her block? She's just living her life to a different beat of the drummer.

 

My confusion also stretches to that of alcoholism. Why is it sophisticated to drink wine with every meal, but trashy to have some beers/bourbon with the boys on weekdays?

 

I suppose the answer is cultural relevance, but I find it unappealing that so many harsh judgments are concluded when the 'judger' takes no time to even try to understand the circumstance of the judged.

There is nothing wrong with drinking a beer with the guys on the weekend as long as you don't get drunk. How many people actually get drunk (or hammered like you would do with your friends) off of drinking a glass or two of wine over the period of an hour while eating food?

Curious that you think a 13 year old would be "sluttier" for doing exactly what an 18 year old would do.

 

I wouldn't call it sluttier, I'd call it stupidity. The reason we have age limits on stuff is both due to physical but mental reasons. Smoking drinking etc is placed at 18/21+ due to health reasons, while sex is usually 16+ due to maturity. The reason people look down on a 12 year old having sex, ESPECIALLY getting knocked up, is because they shouldn't be doing that at that age. They just aren't mentally ready to handle it. Sure women and men physically mature differently, but honestly, maturity doesn't see the light of day until 17 and beyond in most cases.

 

that's my two cents.

 

There is nothing wrong with drinking a beer with the guys on the weekend as long as you don't get drunk. How many people actually get drunk (or hammered like you would do with your friends) off of drinking a glass or two of wine over the period of an hour while eating food?

 

a 10 year old lightweight.

 

....or my Auntie.

Curious that you think a 13 year old would be "sluttier" for doing exactly what an 18 year old would do.

 

I wouldn't call it sluttier, I'd call it stupidity. The reason we have age limits on stuff is both due to physical but mental reasons. Smoking drinking etc is placed at 18/21+ due to health reasons, while sex is usually 16+ due to maturity. The reason people look down on a 12 year old having sex, ESPECIALLY getting knocked up, is because they shouldn't be doing that at that age. They just aren't mentally ready to handle it. Sure women and men physically mature differently, but honestly, maturity doesn't see the light of day until 17 and beyond in most cases.

 

Ehh being "mentally prepared" for having sex is just social programming. Now that there's birth control, really the only reason sex can be considered "bad" is if all your friends and family tell you it is for whatever crazy reason.

Curious that you think a 13 year old would be "sluttier" for doing exactly what an 18 year old would do.

 

I wouldn't call it sluttier, I'd call it stupidity. The reason we have age limits on stuff is both due to physical but mental reasons. Smoking drinking etc is placed at 18/21+ due to health reasons, while sex is usually 16+ due to maturity. The reason people look down on a 12 year old having sex, ESPECIALLY getting knocked up, is because they shouldn't be doing that at that age. They just aren't mentally ready to handle it. Sure women and men physically mature differently, but honestly, maturity doesn't see the light of day until 17 and beyond in most cases.

 

Ehh being "mentally prepared" for having sex is just social programming. Now that there's birth control, really the only reason sex can be considered "bad" is if all your friends and family tell you it is for whatever crazy reason.

 

yes and no, I mean, if it's going at the rate it is, having sex at 10 years old will be the norm. I dunno about you but that's just kinda creepy. Toddlers/children having sex? I can stand adults and teens but pre-teens and toddlers is just going to far imo.

What makes you think kids haven't been having sex as far back as 10 or 11 since well before you were in school?

 

I know at least blow jobs were happening when I was elementary, and sex was definitely on the table in junior high (12-14 roughly). Now, it's not all the kids. It's not even most of them, but it happens. It's not going to roll back any further than it already has because of the biological clock. Think about let's say grade 3. This would be a time when the boys think girls have cooties and the girls think boys are gross and stupid. Sure, the hormones do start a bit after that, which is why you are going to see a few early bloomers right around 10-11, and your going to see a few more at 12, but things don't seem to get going for most people until at least 13-14 (girls) or 14-15 (guys), and even by the end of high school you probably have a lot more virgins than you think.

 

I figure it's been that way for as long as people could get away with it, and it will be that way for as long as people can continue to get away with it, and it hasn't ended the world yet. It just, to me, emphasis the need for education before puberty hits (around here, it starts in grade 4 which is ~ 9 years old, which seems about right).

Why is it so weird for a 10 year old to have sex? Hundreds of generations ago, people only lived to be 30 if they were lucky. You had to breed early, and breed often just to keep your bloodline in tact. Romeo&Juliet? Pretty sure Romeo was 14 and Juliet was like 9 or 10. Society is what removed sexuality from "the child" and it's actually a recent phenomenon. It mostly started in the early 1900's when children's rights demanded they can't work such ridiculous hours and were entitled to a "childhood". This "childhood" then morphed into this abstract phase in life where sexuality holds no presence. Except it does, but because it's a social construction - sexuality is ignored. Sexuality is usually discovered and explored by the time a child is ~3 biologically. Of course it's taboo to even suggest such a thing because social structure is blinded by generations of misinformation and ignorance.

Why is it so weird for a 10 year old to have sex?

 

Because the vast majority of ten year olds aren't sexually mature. Do you know what happens when a ten year old gets pregnant? This article is really lovely: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_youngest_birth_mothers

 

Hundreds of generations ago, people only lived to be 30 if they were lucky. You had to breed early, and breed often just to keep your bloodline in tact.

 

Try 12-14, not 10.

 

Romeo&Juliet? Pretty sure Romeo was 14 and Juliet was like 9 or 10.

 

Try 18 and 13.

 

Society is what removed sexuality from "the child" and it's actually a recent phenomenon. It mostly started in the early 1900's when children's rights demanded they can't work such ridiculous hours and were entitled to a "childhood". This "childhood" then morphed into this abstract phase in life where sexuality holds no presence. Except it does, but because it's a social construction - sexuality is ignored. Sexuality is usually discovered and explored by the time a child is ~3 biologically. Of course it's taboo to even suggest such a thing because social structure is blinded by generations of misinformation and ignorance.

 

Misinformation and ignorance? How about biology and truth? Children have sexual organs, sure...but until sexual maturity is reached (puberty) a child is not a sexual creature in the same sense an adult is.

 

Have you heard of the dolphin picture test? (not sure that's what it's actually called). I'm sure it's "societal construction" that leads to prepubescent children being unable to recognize a picture of lovers.

 

Our society sexualizes children more now than practically any society in our history - that's what's abnormal, not the other way around.