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Understanding is not necessary; basic decency and respect should suffice. You don't need to understand why or how deadnaming and misgendering hurts in order to accept that it does and stop doing it.

I think understanding is definitely a prerequisite in this scenario. In an ideal world, it shouldn't be, but that's not how the real world works in this case. If Tess wanted to be called Malgoroth, the champion of the forgotten realms, would you call her that without question?

 

If you would, that's good for you, but I'd argue that most people would be a bit apprehensive about that. I had an old coworker named Oscar. He didn't mind being called Oscar the Grouch playfully, but he drew an arbitrary line at Oscar Meyer-- he hated being called that for some reason. I respected that, so I'd make sure never to call him Oscar Meyer. But if he went on to say, call me Oscaroth, the champion of the forgotten realms, I'd tell him to go [bleep] himself :lol: But if he told me he was transitioning and wanted me to call him Oscarina, I'd be cool with that.

 

I'd imagine Tess' mom probably doesn't believe that transgenderism is a thing. And she probably can't be bothered to do any research on it because it's propaganda to her and her son (daughter?) is brainwashed/delusional. But if she believed/understood how transgenderism works, I doubt she'd have any qualms about it. My cousin came out as gay a few years ago and his father wasn't pleased. But they both love each other and always have loved each other, so his father quickly came to accept and embrace it. I have a feeling Tess never had the same mutually-loving relationship like my cousin/uncle have, which makes it less of a cooperative "let's figure out how we can work through this together" and more of a competitive "I shouldn't have to change my beliefs/behaviors for you" dynamic.

 

But I don't know either of them IRL so who knows.

It's entirely possible they don't really know what makes me uncomfortable yet. I'm bad at setting boundaries, especially with them. And it hasn't really been that long. Maybe things will get better.

 

I've given them resources. Who knows if they've looked at them. I offered to answer their questions, but they haven't asked any yet. Dad sent me a Jordan Peterson video today, so it seems unlikely that they're really internalizing trans positive voices.

 

It's just like. On the one hand, any positive reaction will probably need time to manifest, and I need to give them that time. And if I push them away before then, it's unlikely their reaction will ever be positive. But on the other hand, there's a very real chance my parent's reaction will never be positive. And while they figure out which way they're gonna go, I have to deal with all the invalidation they throw my way.

 

It's hard to be patient with them. And my impatience isn't any more unreasonable than their ignorance.

ba

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@ Veiva I went to Georgia Tech, let me know if you have questions about it

Is it possible for me to transfer while missing some pre-reqs is my only question lol. If that's a yes, I'm confident I'd transfer in. A few of my teachers at my school went to Georgia Tech and they liked it but that was anywhere from 10-40 years ago. (One of them was talking about how the area around Georgia Tech was like "the projects" when he attended but that's no longer a problem obviously).

 

Seriously though, when did you go? What program were you in? How difficult were the courses? If you've been to another school, how do the courses compare at Georgia Tech? Was going to Georgia Tech over a smaller university worth it? What were the networking opportunities like while you attended?

 

I could most definitely get into NC State which would be like 1/10th the cost, but a CS degree from Georgia Tech looks a lot better than a CS degree from NC State...

i grabulated from georgia tech 14 yearas ago if that hlps

We have such a diverse and inter-connected family here :')

I have some co-workers with CS degrees from GT if you want me to pass some questions along

If I have "3 lengths of chain", what does that mean to y'all? I want to make sure I'm not using confusing terminology.

u got 3 balla blingin chains covered in ice and made from pimpin gold to war round yo neck

u got 3 balla blingin chains covered in ice and made from pimpin gold to war round yo neck

Covered in ice??

yeh

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u guys ever think about how there are other people who post on different parts of this forum that we never interact with

 

If I have "3 lengths of chain", what does that mean to y'all? I want to make sure I'm not using confusing terminology.

That you have three chains. (My mind goes to logging, towing)

 

and pimpin

Goon, you are on fire today my friend.

 

I reached out to the "others" on TIF that are non OT. They weren't interested in inter mingling much. Not that it's so different from us sticking to our sub forum.

 

As for 3 lengths of chain? I'm pictures about 3ft of industrial chains, as mentioned for things like towing. But I like Goon's answer better so...ice ice baby

 

I reached out to the "others" on TIF that are non OT. They weren't interested in inter mingling much. Not that it's so different from us sticking to our sub forum.

 

wow [bleep] them

Alright, apparently that did not translate to "3 discrete chain ropes" or whatever. That's what I was trying to say, but it didn't mean what I thought.

 

Not that it matters, my players never went where the chains were lol.

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Yeah, just being queer doesn't really make you part of the community. Having significant relationships within wider circles of queer individuals makes you part of the community, but even then, it's easy to be very much on the outskirts of it. Participation is a really important part of being in a community.

Most women take their husbands last name (or at least used to in majority) and they go by a new nam. And for generations it's never been a big deal to call someone by that new name. "MRS Smith instead of Ms. JONES"

 

It's pretty simple stuff

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GOT S8E5 thoughts

 

[Hide]best episode this season, but it was a super low bar. I feel completely cheated that more characters didn't die in the Battle of Winterfell seeing as how we will never see them again anyway. Yara, Brianne, Tormund, Gendry...etc.

 

Also the Cercei/Jamie death scene could have been handled better. Why build up his redemption for 7 seasons just to throw him in the same gutter he started in? I'm fine with them dying as they "came into the world" as the producer put it but it should have been handled better.

 

And RIP all the character development they gave Sansa...[/hide]

When a company emails you:

 

"{{Applicant first name}}, you're invited to an interview!"

 

Also there must be some gif that describes trying to interact with non-OT users..