josef

man, this is a great forum. i love being able to come here and get advice from other players, here in the "Help & Advice" forum. oh, wait, this isn't the "Help & Advice" forum? that's right, this is the "Rant" forum! where you "Blow off steam by venting your game frustrations," i.e., you Rant! so i guess that when people post here, they're just trying to get things off their chest. they aren't asking for forty people to tell them why they're wrong, what they can do better, or that if they don't like it they shouldn't play Runescape. maybe they like Runescape enough to keep playing in spite of some inconveniences, but just want to vent about them a little bit. maybe they actually have the limited cognitive ability realize that it's just part of the game, and the don't need several dozen smart-[wagon] telling them so. maybe every jerkwad sitting behind their computer screen waiting to find someone they can criticize so they can feel superior for a fleeting instant and actually get it up should troll the "Help and Advice" or "Bugs and Suggestions" forums. whoo. that feels better. but in all seriousness, the purpose of the rant forum - indeed, of rants in general - is an emotional release, not a logical request. 10$ says that the next post is something along the lines of "well, if you don't like people criticizing your rants, don't post in the Rants forum."

ha! answered my own question (the one pertaining to the windows 95 background, not what happened to arcades or why NL is still in business). this guy actually posted standard backgrounds for pretty much every version of Windows since 95 - http://home.mchsi.com/~khadzic/MyWebsite/files/category-5.html although the file is fairly low res - was it always that small? part of me is suspicious of another cadbury-esque conspiracy. well now my desktop is all old-school. gives me a hankerin for some Quake 2...

you know, it seems that consumer technology is being progressively dumbed down. i remember several times taking apart my old sony walkman tapeplayer (ahh - magnetic recordings...back in the day...) and tinker around in it. probably why it ended breaking permanantly... i will say this for the ipod - it's generally well-made and sturdy, but i think that they got too many graphic design majors involved in the ergonomics of the thing. for example - when i want to turn up my volume, i want to turn a dial, or push a button, something where there is a mechanical system available to verify that my actions have been recorded - the dial turns, or the button clicks. i don't want to just rub my finger on something. other times i would be going through menus, and i would scroll my finger too fast and go back a few menus. a minor inconvenience, but i still prefer the old digital system - exactly one click means exactly one action, not "rotate your finger a little bit more - oops to far, go back" yeah, it's an innovative feature, but doesn't improve my music experience at all, and i suspect that the trackpad addition also brings the price up a little bit. i mean, if you think about it, it is kind of a novel practice for technology to be as simple, fun, and user-friendly as it has become. i mean, compare working on a windows xp system to just windows 3.1 - just a decade apart! however, it seems that as user-friendliness increases, your technological autonomy falls out. yeah, the iPod is cool and fun and easy to use, but when it stops working, then you have to have sombody else to fix it, and it ends up just being easier to buy a new one. whereas with my old walkman, i could just pull out a screwdriver and go to work. i think that's why i would prefer to go to a non-apple mp3 player - i tend to have a distrust of anything that's just a little too user-friendly. i want to know that if i have to go down into the guts (even if it's a very bad idea, or if i don't know what i'm doing) i still have that option.

about as random as it gets, but does anybody know where i can get a picture file of the Windows 95 setup background? you know, where they had the mouse and the keyboard and other computer equipment in a blue lithograph, and it looked really cool? i'd really like that as my desktop background. i seem to have hit something of a 90's nostalgia period (and no, i haven't had cable for about a year now, so please don't blame this on any VH1-esque trip) - first i'm going through my old music and finding stuff like boss tones and soundgarden, then I'm looking up websites on old awesome shows like Pete and Pete, or power rangers. man - all of the old nickelodeon shows were awesome - GUTS, You Can't Do That On Television, Clarrissa, All That (although I hated the skit where that kid spent the whole time screaming), that one about the Lost Temple or something, and there was video-game based gameshow. and the good old fashioned Nicktoons - Doug, Ren and Stimpy, Rugrats, Rocko...I'll admit though that I started to lose interest somewhere around the Angry Beavers. and do you remember when arcades were cool? my dad worked at the university and sometimes my brother and I would go meet him after school and we'd take quaters and go play video games in the student union, or when we'd go to the mall my parents and sisters would go shopping while my brother and me (not nostalgic for that one - even as a junior high (junior high? yeah, i think that's right) kid i knew the acting was juvenile) would spend all of our money on Street Fighter, XMen, Police trainer, Soul Edge, Ninja Turtles (we weren't allowed to play the games like Mortal Kombat or Area 51. not that we didn't, we just had to watch our backs and time it right.) nowadays they don't have arcades anywhere, and the ones that are still around have decade-old games because nobody plays them anymore - everyone's stuck on consoles. speaking of random - right now i'm looking at an advertisement for a National Lampoon movie featuring a young naked coed. is it just me, or has NL bleed the vein of party/college comedies absolutely dry? i mean seriously - why don't they just name them "National Lampoon's Animal House XXVI - This time, National Lampoon goes direct-to-video so fast, we're not even done filming it!" i mean, without the magazine, why do they still exist? i think that life will be a lot better when they finally have to declare bankruptcy. sooo.....yeah, if anybody knows where i can get that Win95 wallpaper that'd be great.

... *commences the throwing of rotten vegetables* ok... so a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. the bartender looks at them and says, "what is this, some kind of joke?"

This is a choose your own adventure game set in Runescape (Gielinor). You are given several options, you choose one and write a section of the story based on it, then set up several options (about 3-4 is good, but that's up to you) for the next author. After your training on Tutorial Island, your boat arrives in Lumbridge. You step off, stretch your legs and look around. You are surprised at not only how many people are in the vicinity, but the blatant violence in a town that was described as generally peaceful - only just across the river hordes of goblins are being slaughtered as they apparently rise out of the ground. You don't have long to look around before you are approached by a rather rough-looking fellow carrying a weather-worn knapsack. "Excuse me," he says, "but I need a partner in a .... a rather profitiable venture. If you would accompany me to the castle cellar we could speak more...openly." A. Follow him to the cellar B. Demand that he tell you his plan out here at the crossroads. C. Leave him and pursue your own fortune.

the unbreakable scanner spontaneously combusts and re-kills all pokemon, and is replaced by a completely unbreakable scanner the next guy somehow breaks the completely unbreakable scanner, replacing it with a pokemon-friendly super, duper, uber, absolutely unbreakable scanner. the forum begins to fill with a debate mainly consisting of "you can't do that's", "uh-huh's" and "nuh-uh's", followed by a compelling point by person A claiming person B to be glue whilst he is constituted of rubber, and the resulting interaction of statements due to their relative compositions... after this has gone on much longer than it ever should have, the normal, everyday magical scanner is reinstated. presses "8" scans Quizno's gift card

due to Germany's early defeat, the war casualties are much lower, thus WWI does not earn the title "the war to end all wars." the allied nations don't hold nearly as great of a grudge against Germany, leading to much easier terms in the treaty of Versaisse, allowing germany and the rest of Europe to rebuild after the war, as well as hurting the German pride a little less. all of this means that Hitler does not have necesarry support to rise to power, and is soon committed after his downward descent into mental breakdown after both his artistic and political failures. thus, WWII never happens, but this allows to Russia to rise in power much faster and seek to expand its empire, while the U.S. does not have the military/industrial jumpstart to its economy and remains in the Great Depression. Russia quickly capitalizes on the opportunity and conquers the US. Dos Vidanya Comrade!! *goes back to 1840 and kills Karl Marx before he writes the Communist Manifesto

banned for using bad ASCII art in your sig

he didn't - he wrote a bunch of poetry so vague that you could reinterpret it to mean whatever you want. notice that nostradamus'es predictions are always found out after the fact; for example, people didn't read nostradamus and predict 9/11, but after the towers fell, some people looked back and reinterpreted what the verses said to match what they saw. when someone can read nostradamus and tell me what is going to happen, then it happens, i'll start listening suppose that you don't vote one day, how much effect does that really have on an election?

unlike russian roulette, which only involves blind luck, stock car racing does involve some amount atheletic skill - especially quick reflexes, a sense of timing, and a certain amount of physical endurance. why is it necesarry for every anime show to have some diabetically cute character that adds nothing to the plot or viewing experience?

the keypad has had it with the effing pokemon, and kills itself. also, all of the pokemon across the world die and there was much rejoicing [replacement keypad is brought in] presses alpha button, slides omega card

granted. he then sues you for breaking his own fingers, takes all of your money, and lives out the rest of his days with wine, women and song. you on the other hand spend your days trying to trade food stamps for crack. i wish that anyone with an RS name that involves "Death" "deadly" PKer" "deathberger" "deathXor" or any derivative thereof would recieve a severe electrical shock at next login

original - 9/10 hybrid theory remix - 6/10 jay-z remix - 2/10 burden in my hand, by soundgarden

banned for unfair PKing (post-killing)

definitely the legions of "Zezima's" secondary characters. i mean, everbody says Zezima - why not look down a little bit on the hiscores and claim to be Uloveme, or Casserole? it's a little bit more original, and still the same unnecesarrily high level! WDYHM: people who speak in "l33t" in real life or getting your wisdom t33th pulled (also known as "getting dentally PWND!!!!")

you get a life. ha, not really. ... [inserts slug]

Just for the amusement of your fellow runescapers (or runescapees as it may be) lets share some embarassing/dumb runescape moments. Here's one of mine: Recently I was playing my second-string character, a level 30 warrior. I was chilling out in the dark warriors fortress in level 15 wilderness, mainly collecting runes and cappin dark warriors, but hopefully waiting for some lower level players to show up and have some fun. my wish was granted - a level 19 archer climbs down from the above tower and starts shooting at me. Now this guy is skulled, he's working alone, and he's hitting 0s, 1s, and 2s, maybe the occasional 3 or 4, while i'm just wailing on him, ever other turn he's eating something. It's like this guy's trying to commit suicide, and i'm just amazed he's even trying this, so i just ask him point blank, "Are you dumb or something?" Perhaps this would be a good time to mention that i was not on an exactly stable internet connection. I live close enough to campus to pick up the wireless, but it's always like "very low connectivity" well, just at the point where i decided to question his mental fortitude, the wireless decided to drop down into the "piss-poor to no connectivity range" and now i'm laggin too much to be able to eat that crucial lobster, all the while he keeps wearing me down with 1's, 2's, and then he hits me up for 10 with a water strike. so to summarize, the endevor goes like this: archer show's up, archer is skulled and over 10 levels below me, archer attacks, i say "Are you dumb or something?", i die. As soon as i showed up in lumbridge i logged off in shame.

personally i think that the movie is great. it steps out on a limb and rejects the typical comedy formula for something more original, and the effort really pays off. however, what's not funny is everyone quoting the movie over, and over, anc over, and over, and over, and... you get the picture. now almost every five minutes someone is calling you "Idiot, Gaw!" or bragging about their bowhunting skills. this movie is almost as overquoted as monty python and the holy grail, only without the accents. i could go on, but right now i have to chat online with hot chicks all day... P.S. - whenever i first saw this movie i was thinking "this movie is hilarious, but this guy is going to be stuck in the "retarted comedy" genre for the rest of his career." his next project - playing a supporting to david spade playing a supporting role to rob schneider. i doubt things will go uphill from here. too bad, he's a talented guy P.P.S. - napolean dynamite vs. the black knight - who would win?

woah! that's crazy man! the things that they invent. why, i remember back in my day, all we had were wood-burning computers... that bears a striking resemblance to the interface used in Minority Report. maybe this is another case of life imitating art.

maybe that little chiuaua dog might have survived... what if you programmed a little robot on wheels to move forward one foot in one minute, and then 6 inches in 30 seconds, and then 3 inches in 15 seconds, and on and on for infinite iterations, each time cutting the distance in half as well as the time, so that it never slow down, it never stops moving, but yet it never meets the two foot mark?

banned for just being a real "member" :lol:

the scythe is a weapon that was a non-tradable drop on haloween...03 i wanna say? it's not that good of a weapon, i think the highest attack value is 10 slash or something, but it is interesting to note that it is the only weapon other than the spear that has stab, slash and crush. also, if you drop it, no one else can pick it up, and you can get it back for free from the varrock clothes shop. so i guess you might be able to use it for a kind of risk-free PKing, but i doubt it would be effective. Haha, that reminds me of this one time i got bored, and just grabbed my scythe and ran into the deep wilderness, and basically just launched this furious kamikaze attack on some guy 30 levels higher than me, and he was like "wtf?"...sorry, i'm easily amused. anywho, it's just a weak weapon that looks wicked awesome, and if you don't have one there's no way you'll ever get one, sorry bro.

Of course the Scythe. and you know what? the next haloween drop should be a skull mask. then, you can put on some black robes, and be Death! sweet...

i'm not trying to be the polite police, but there are some things that people do on the world 66 entrana that drive me insane. it seems to be the runners that do these things more often than the crafters (which is not to say that all crafters are peaches and effing cream), maybe because crafters tend to be more experienced players or more focused on crafting, or maybe because there's just more runners hanging around to get on your nerves. anywho, here are just a few faux pas's that i try to avoid- Attacking NPC's in the crafting area - This really gets in the way of looking for open crafters, and it closes out several spaces on the right-click menu if the unicorns, fire birds, or bears (oh my!) happen to be on the same square as someone with whom you wish to trade. not to mention that it's just plain annoying. if you absolutely must whet your appetite for a barefisted smackdown, please do so a good distance away from the crafting gounds also, leave the effing cats at home. although having a cat around isn't as visually distracting as a fight, they get in the way just as much. don't you just hate it when you see the bottom of the right-click menu and it says "walk here this_guy, follow this_guy" and then it just cuts off? me too Open.....(no name) - in case you didn't notice it can get a scooch crowded around the law altar, and if you're at the bottom of a 50-player lawcrafting orgy, you're kinda difficult to separate from the crowd. so if you just say "open" it could be any of the players stacked up in that particular square, and since text flies fast and furious during lawrunning, your "open" can easily get pushed outside of the message box before most can read who just squeaked out from beneath the dogpile here's a helpful hint, one that most crafters use to great avail - say "(your name) open". now i realize that this can be a lot of typing if your name is Sk8tboarderInuyashaL337GokuPkerofdeathLinkinParkFan457281002, so just try using an abreviated version of your name, such as "Sk8t open". yes, i realize that there are 457,281,001 other Sk8tboarderInuyashaL337GokuPkerofdeathLinkinParkFans out there who might use the same nickname, but hopefully they won't be lawcrafting at the same time. Idle Chatter - this isn't really as big a peeve as the others on this list, but it does get old after a while, and i still have nothing better to with my time than this post ; ). as previously stated, there's a lot going on at the lawrunning site and needless text tends to clutter up the screen, especially when you feel the need to dress it up in flashing lights and flowing text. i'm sure that we're all fascinated by what level you are, what happened on last night's "inuyasha", or just how much you hate those stinking noobs, but maybe you could find a more appropriate forum for discussing these topics, such as the varrock marketplace, or the 7th circle of hell. either one works. This topic actually leads quite nicely into my final beef, which is... LAW ME!!!!!! - how about you go law yourself, pal? lawrunning 101 - there are a more runners than there are crafters, a lot more; you now need them much more than they need you. i mean, seriously, do you thing that there's this guy standing there in red robes, wringing his hands and fretting "oh no, who shall i ever get to take these FREE EFFING LAW RUNES off my hands? woe is me!" and you ride in on your white horse, declaring "Fear thee Not! For behold, I come bearing Essences to relieve you of your terrible Burden. LAW ME!" let that image simmer for a moment, just to get the full effect... ok, i got a little thick on the sarcasm there, but this is probably the most annoying thing to me since unsliced bread. the demand for law runes far surpasses the supply, so the runecrafters don't have to seek people out to get them essences. all they have to do is show up in a set of zamorack robes and they're deluged by trade requests. probably the worst of this is running off to the edge of the crowd and screaming "!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!LAW ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" if you can't get a trade request through, making yourself less accessible and more vocal doesn't help. if you hang around for 10-20 minutes without getting a successful trade, maybe it's time to take a break, go do a quest or - even better - spend some quality meatspace time. come back later when it may be less crowded. i just wanna know am i alone in this, or can a brother get an holla?