Kalphite

Idk I actually enjoyed working at Jimmy Johns. It was super laid back, everyone was super friendly and I actually hung out with coworkers outside work, plus minimal injury risk lol. Today was...a bit of a roller coaster lol. I've been struggling a lot with impostor syndrome at work these past few weeks because I just feel like I've been underperforming relative to where I want to be right now and I've been feeling like I'm not worth as much as I'm being paid. Just have been getting really down because of it and nearly broke down at work yesterday before I was saved by a lunch break and was able to pull myself back together. Anyways, today I ended up having an informal meeting with my team lead and without me even prompting it he mentioned that the previous intern didn't mention that he felt impostor syndrome until the very final evaluation and wanted to know if I was feeling anything similar and that it was okay to talk to him about it.he also mentioned that he has been struggling with it on and off since he got to Google. Idk it's a really shitty feeling but it felt good to feel less alone with it. Anyways, after work I went to a mewithoutYou/Foxing show in San Francisco. On my way up there, I got a call from a friend back home saying that my best friend had ended up in the hospital after an anxiety attack. I talked to her boyfriend and he said that she just randomly started saying a bunch of terrifying depressing things and so he took her in, but she was calmed down now and he and her family would make sure she wasn't alone for the weekend. I'm really glad that they're doing that for her, it sucks ass knowing that a close friend is going through such serious stuff and being 2600 miles away and unable to do anything. I got to talk to her eventually though and she seemed calm, I'm hoping I can talk to her more tomorrow. At the same time that I was dealing with that, I got a text from my mom saying that my baby cousin had been kidnapped by his birthfather and taken to Texas. It apparently seems more like a custody dispute than an actual kidnapping but it is still super worrisome. Nothing I can really do about it though. Anyways, despite all of that the show was incredible. It was my first time seeing Foxing and my second time seeing meiwthoutYou and both bands were amazing, it's been so long since ive been to a show with that much energy where I could actually mosh kinda haha. Ended up getting headbutted in the face so I got out of there pretty quickly. One of my front teeth hurts like a [bleep] but nothing's lose and my retainer still fits so I think it's all fine. Still hella fun though. Now, to try to fall asleep and somehow make it into work tomorrow without too big of a hangover...

What was the problem with tinder you found? Edit: I should have reset my tinder profile when i returned to London. At the bottom of the [bleep]ing pile. In contest with 500,000+ other users (males). Probably easier to not use OKCupid. Seeing as one can swipe 100 or so girls a day now. Might just set my search to 25 miles (other end) and swipe the first 10 or so cards before reducing the radius to see if that will change anything. Either that or I will just reset my tinder :|. Just getting annoyed with how many flakes I get and I don't really feel confident going for first-meet-lays like everyone is encouraging with it when I still haven't gotten farther than making out with a girl, and even that hasn't happened for me sober. I just feel like the slightly slower pace allowed by how muggi talks about okcupid might be easier to start out with when i"m this inexperienced. And idk like I've gone on about 7 dates off of it over the last year and I've still never seen any of those girls a second time, just want to try something new I guess idk.

thinking of just throwing tinder under the bus and trying out okcupid for a while instead because [bleep]. Muggi do you still have any success with that or did tinder kill it more or less?

Just weighed myself for the first time since I started lifting again in mid March and found out I'm up about 14 pounds since then, pretty much none of it being extra body fat :thumbup: veryyy happy with this for three months progress

got hit by a car on my bike on my way to work today. I didn't fall off or get hurt or anything, it was a really light hit, but still pretty jolting. Just got home after being at work for about 12 hours. granted the last 3 of those were dinner / gym / walking home because I'm bikeless but god it's so exhausting. Finally back up to 135 3x5 on my bench though so I'm pretty much back up to the strongest I've been physically which is nice, just have 10 more pounds to go on my squat and deadlift to get those back up to 225 and I'll beback up there on everything. Also the new sorority noise album is amazing

Went and saw Purity Ring tonight and it was [bleep]ing beautiful even though their set was wy too short. danced with some baes too which was fun, now im super crossed and i should be falling asleep but idk i feel like i want o do more stil. the struggle is so real rn

Whelp I pitched a Starbucks date. She replied to my message on my bike ride home and by the time i could check my phone she had unmatched me lol so I'll never get to see her reasoning. This is not my week lol

Trying to schedule a date this week with a new girl this week. Problems are that I don't get back from work until 7-8 most nights so coffee seems weird and she's only 20 so bars are off limits. Ideally I wouldn't want to wait until Saturday when I'll actually have a free afternoon for a coffee date either. Any suggestions? I guess I could just pitch a meet at Starbucks and not get anything lol, it is the closest thing to my place. Or I could try to get her to come over directly but if that doesn't work out I'll still need a fallback

Did you talk w/ her at all between when she rescheduled and when you were actually supposed to meet up? And did you confirm the meet 24 hours prior to the date? IME it's almost impossible to meet up w/ a girl on Tinder if the date isn't scheduled for either that night or the next day, though, so don't feel too bad about it I didn't, I figured it was only two days in between and I didn't want to overdo it because we had already had a decent conversation the night we scheduled it. but yeah trying to schedule meets off Tinder is always a crapshoot lol, I'm not taking it personally but I figured I'd give the update since I mentioned it here

Ended up getting flaked on anyways whelp

lmfaooo whelp guess I wasn't fast enough to cut that one out

Dude good luck, it's super late fir an internship but I guess I don't know the playing field here, in Michigan the last chance for an internship is usually the January career fair :/ I'm smashed, went to bard for the the first time and got a flight of a bunch of 11%s and a couple old fashioned and whacks sours and finally found a weed dealer in this [bleep]ing state Going to a smash tourney tomorrow's and should be fun at and I'm seeing Steven Wilson Sunday can't wait!!!, but rn I'm listening to Lorde til I fall asleep cause [bleep] batches gig money Should b a gr8 weekendd

Matched with a really hot girl last night on Tinder, ended up talking to her and it turns out we're both working at Google, had a date scheduled for tonight and everything was going A+... Then she ended up flaking at work because she said she was too tired and asked to reschedule to getting lunch at work on Monday. So now I have a date with probably the hottest girl I've been on a date with... at work lol. I don't know what to make of this

Johnny Walker Black Label is really really good

As a former pmod, its not like there was anything we possibly could have done about it anyways. Since I haven't really been drinking much and I have all my food catered at work I've decided to try to do a cut on a keto diet because I figure this will be the easiest time to do so compared to once I'm back home or at school and actually have things to do over the weekend. 3 days in and it isn't as bad as I expected but you don't realize how many carbs you eat on a daily basis until you cut all of them out, like even a lot of vegetables aren't really viable. Hopefully it'll pay off though, I don't have a crazy amount of fat to lose but I definitely could use a bit of a cut. Going to try to continue my lifting regimen as much as I can while I do this. If I can stick to this for the last 8 weeks that I'm here I can definitely get some worthwhile results.

Start doing Starting Strength or Stronglifts 5x5 or GreySkull LP rather than exclusively benching like you've mentioned before in the sports forum and i'd be very impressed if you managed to put on any fat over the muscle gains lol. 2 months on Starting Strength has already made a visible difference, and I probably have much more body fat obscuring things lol (5'4" and 140ish lbs here)

turning 21 in about 2 hours and im completely sober and i tried throwing a party here but literally everyone i invited bailed and moving sucks and idk what to do now

Basically the caffiene makes you feel more sober than you actually are and gives you more energy so you end up drinking more alcohol than you should to compensate for it. Sometimes its bad, sometimes its good. Can be dangerous because you're mixing stimulants and depressants if you do a lot. Pretty much textbook what you'd expect from mixing the two lol.

first actual day of work, 11 hours at the office doing tutorials on things i actually need to learn by thursday and im not even halfway though this turned around fast lol

Dialects: 1. American (Standard) 2. US Black Vernacular / Ebonics 3. Canadian Native : 1. English 2. Dutch 3. Swedish I mean I am American from a suburb of Detroit that is about 30 minutes from the Canadian border so the top three guesses are probably fairly accurate lol.

Went as alright as any of my other first dates have went. we got coffee and went for a walk, she did most of the talking, etc etc. hugged her at the beginning and end but we were sitting weirdly while we were at starbucks where i couldnt reach her hand and then when we went for a walk her hand on my side was up by her purse the whole time so there wasn't any more touching in between that. i'm probably just making excuses cause I'm [kitty]ing out though but whatever. She did say she wanted to hang out again before she left though. Apparently she's only here for the rest of this week before she moves back to LA so I'll keep trying in the meantime I guess.

Well it's been a while since I've posted here but a lot's been happening and now I'm too lazy to write it all up. My going away party last weekend turned out amazingly. About 40 ish people came out and I got to see pretty much everybody I wanted to. Had a really close call at the end though. Most of the party was sober, but at around 11 pm we got a handle for people who wanted it. It was working out fine, but at 1:30 am the cops were called for a noise violation. All they did was usher us all inside, but if they would have turned the corner around the shed they would have seen the handle and I would have been [bleep]ed. The party relocated to another friend's house, and one of my friends that wasn't drinking drove me and a couple of my other friends that were. We ended up getting pulled over on the way there, and the cop was interrogating my friend pretty hard. He finished by asking if we lined us all up and brethalyzed all of us if we would all blow 0s before walking back to his car. Thankfully he believed my friend that we wouldn't and let us off, but it was terrifying how close of calls those were to getting an MIP / worse 2 weeks before I turn 21. Anyways, I'm all moved into my apartment in Mountain View now for my internship. The apartment is great and Google has been awesome so far. My first week has just been a bunch of orientation classes, but it a lot of them were interesting. And food. Lotsssssssss of food. finally got back into a gym routine there which feels great, though its weird being in a gym where the demographic is almost all software engineers where I end up being one of the bigger guys there, which is saying nothing. Gradually have been making some other intern friends too, though I haven't actually managed to hang out with any of them yet outside work. Checked out San Francisco for the first time yesterday. The city is awesome, but not having a car blows as does not being 21 yet, most of the places were closed at the awkward time we were there. Got some of the best pizza I've ever had in my life there though and I'm definitely down to go back another day, it just blows that it takes about 2 hours to get there / leave and the weird public transport schedule kinda stops me from going to shows / bars / smash tournaments out there like I wanted to.

I'm inclined to believe the latter. Been in a new town for one week and I have a Tinder date saturday morning. She was pushing for it a lot more than me so I'm excited to see how this goes, pretty cute too.

leaving to fly across the country for the summer in 5 hours and im still not done packing gg crazy night last night but i'll have to save the story for tomorrow when i have more free time to write it up

TIL this album is just magical Also, packing and getting my shit together to move out to california in 3 days is beyond weird to me