Corrupt a Wish (IT's over Nine Thousand)

[Blaze The Movie Fan]

Granted, but someone with a gun aims a pistol at you, and threatens to kill you if you don't give it to him.

 

I wish the slayer level in RuneScape would affect my combat level.

[Nenga]

Granted but Jagex IP bans you for botting.

 

I wish could not die of any cause and didn't age.

[Blaze The Movie Fan]

Granted, one day everything alive on this planet dies, except you, and you're lonely for being the last survivor.

 

Wait, what? I didn't use bots, I would never do that. I am going to send a message to Jagex explaining to them I didn't use a bot.

 

I wish Jagex would read the message and unban me and apologize for any inconvenience.

[Goonstalf]

They unban you, but you're promptly hacked 5 minutes later and lose all your stuffs.

 

I wish I had had better things to do than play Runescape, back when I played Runescape.

[iamcoool11]

Granted, but instead you play WoW and get obese and die!

 

I wish that people would all quit the internet and start talking from your mouth!

[Goonstalf]

Granted, unfortunately no one has anything to talk about.

 

I wish my apartment didn't smell like a land fill.

[Blaze The Movie Fan]

Granted, instead it smells even worse.

 

I wish for a dragon in my cellar.

[jamesrules90]

You get one but it kills you

 

I wish I didn't have ants in my house.

[Blaze The Movie Fan]

Granted, they go to your car instead. (or something else not in your house if you don't have one)

 

I wish for a fridge of infinite Coca-Cola.

[Goonstalf]

Granted, but in order to store the infinite Coke the fridge is the size of a supernova, and the force of it's gravity causes the Earth to break apart and kills everyone.

 

I wish I could jump really high.

[SeanyTheSailor]

Granted, you are now black, but there is no longer any fried chicken in the world.(or watermelon)

 

I wish I owned the internet.

[Blaze The Movie Fan]

Granted, you are now the owner of the Internet, but a lot of people look at you as a greedy bastard, and eventually you end up with no friends.

 

I wish that every time someone spoke a language that isn't English, English subtitles would appear right next to them out of nowhere, then I'd talk to some Japanese dudes.

[Goonstalf]

Um, ok. Granted, but the subtitles malfunction and you start calling them whiny little [bleep]es in Japanese and they beat you up.

 

I wish my laundry would wash itself.

[SeanyTheSailor]

Granted, the moment your laundry gets a spec of dirt on it, it washes itself, until eventually it washes itself away, then with no close your "goods" become infected without any protection and they fall off / out.

 

I wish there weren't any mean fat people.

[Goonstalf]

Granted, but with the sudden decrease of weight on the Earth's surface, the pressure the core puts out causes the Earth's crust to explode outwards; throwing everything on the Earth's surface into space.

 

I wish I had a cool jacket.

[SeanyTheSailor]

Granted, you then wear it outside during winter, coupled with the cold temperatures, your COOL jacket causes you to get full body frostbite and you die.

 

I wish that my brain could perfectly remember all I see.

[Goonstalf]

Granted, but it explodes due to information overload.

 

I wish I had a perfectly normal bottle of water.

[SeanyTheSailor]

Granted, but in a freak accident as you tilt it back a piece of ceiling falls down and shoves the bottle halfway down your throat, and you drown.

 

I wish i had the brain of an Asian.

[Goonstalf]

Granted, but after a few days it starts attracting flies and you wish you had at least put it in a jar or something.

 

I wish I was Malakili the Rancor Keeper and that Luke didn't kill my pet Rancor.

[SeanyTheSailor]

Granted, however when you go to tell Jabba the Hutt the good news you become crushed underneath him and die, never being allowed to enjoy your new rancor.

 

I wish no one would corrupt this dream. o.0

[Goonstalf]

Granted, no one does, but since it's such a boring wish you don't really get anything out of it. Then you fall down the stairs.

 

I wish I had a third arm protruding out of the center of my chest.

[SeanyTheSailor]

Granted, the doctors made it from your goods. You can no longer go to the bathroom so you die.

 

i wish I had a secret hideout underneath a mountain.

[Goonstalf]

Granted, but your hideout is discovered by dwarves who kill you.

 

I wish I could run really fast.

[SeanyTheSailor]

Granted, however you can never stop, you are doomed to run the earth until your body is worn down to nothing.

 

I wish I was a 10-story tall, fire breathing, flying, Muai Tai-knowing, velociraptor.

[Goonstalf]

Granted, but someone pokes you in the eye.

 

I wish 321 won the lottery.