I_am_Geed

Yeah. I wasnt planning on sitting around waiting on a hope and a prayer we might get back together.. I'v been though enough but another attempted suicide? No thanks. I guess all I can do is continue on while keeping a "if it happens it happens" in the back of my mind because love is definatly mutually there.

Olawds time for idk how long of a post. Small recap. Was having the time of my life with this girl I met. Completely knocked my socks off. I had so much fun with her. I began to feel something that I'v never felt before. I may not be totally experienced with serious relationships (only 19) but there were these voices both in the back of my head and deep down teeling me this girl was different. God they were right. She was. Things, amazing for I dunno.... 9ish months? We have fun in college because we live so close to each other but when we went home for the summer we live 5 hours apart. We made attempts to see each other and went through with them. About mid July I notice something odd begins to happen. She gets jelous of the girls that I work with because one of them will be going to school near me and wants to hang out with me, without my (now ex) girlfriend there because she doesnt want to be the ackward 3rd wheel. I see it as harmless, but by failure and lack of communication on both our sides, small things like that slowly change our moods. She seems to feel distant to me. Theres this new guy shes hanging out with. Insta-warning bells in my head. Now im usually optimistic but I had another little voice in the back of my head tell me "prepare for the worst prepare for the worst" Well worst came a few days later... We had one of those "serious talk" the ones where you know something bad is going to happen. It could have been worse. She told me the truth straight up. She had feelings for this guy (even though she hadnt done anything with him) and that she wanted a break because she felt confused about what she wanted. Im crushed. For many reasons. For one, the way I view relationships is something im not going to get from my age group (I get into serious relationships, because I dont like the idea of dating someone knowing it will end "if your going to say goodbye why bother?" kinda attitude) as im only 19, but its like.... Im happy when im in those kinds of relationships... This was about a month / 3 weeksish ago.... She called the other day.. she knows im very hurt because of the way I view relationships and I took it hard because I personally feel like im being betrayed / cheated. I felt like everything i worked for and accomplished she just kinda took and threw aside like it ment nothing. we've had these kinda heart to heart conversations for the past 2 nights over the phone that keep bringing us both to tears. Im jelous that I know shes inevitably and probably going to date this other guy. I know that even though we still care deeply about each other and as she put it "theres a special connection between us" I know what I want wont happen (a relationship) and it hurts to come to terms with it. But most of that I can handle, im a big boy. What I need advice on is this. She said she still wants to be my friend. Her philosophy is that if you cant be friends after a relationship, something went wrong. Im all fine with being her friend (for the time being) but its like ugh. Its going to be hard untill/unless I get over her because when one side wants to be friends and the other side wants more it spells disaster. But its like.... idk. She doesnt want a serious relationship now, she wants to live and go have fun before she settles down and its totally respectable and im fine with that. But the way I work, and the way I operate is I have fun being in a serious relationship like how I was with her. I like the feelings, the ideas that they give. Im obviously not going to have any kind of anything close to a relationship for a long time now, untill I get into that age range where people are looking for serious stuff. Is it worth to stay her friend at the chance that fires re-kindle? I mean its not like im not going to do anything with girls / keep my blinders on sitting around and waiting for her, but the way I feel (which is intensely strong) worth saying "this might be a case of right girl, wrong time" and see what the future hold and have as a possibility that she *may* be the one I end up with? ===========disclaimzorz=========== I cannot tell the future. Neither can you. This is only a possibility. I realize that by the time this comes around we may have grown apart from each other, or visa versa. ============================= Odd note didnt know where to put this but im 19 and shes 22. Help a Hopeless Chivalrous Romantic out? One who believes in the greatness of miracles, luck, and choosing your own path.

Gratz <3: you troll general

[spoiler=For Steph :3]

Right now i think my vote goes to Jiblex for his incredible courage to walk into the howling darkness, and to not return... And also to make videos about botting and how bad it is and get de-modded over it

After 9 jillion hours of Battlefield, I always check corners. I look like a [developmentally delayed] irl but its whats drilled into my mind. Def helps when I play paintball tho...

Today I posted under the mighty Troll General himself

suddenly Im insta-jelous.

:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

A select few have been trolling Green's cc for years now and this info is golden xD

What I dont like out of this is that dicers give pmods a share to keep other dicers out of their territory. If im ever a pmod im forming the pmod riot squad to strike back at these corrupt [wagon].

OOOPS DOUBLE POST Luls Masters was easy to break into a few months ago. Im not up to date with the current metagame but Protoss / Zerg should have a simple time getting in.

Playing Perfect Dark / Perfect Dark Zero again <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: <3: So addicted haha.

[spoiler=99 HP] Time to work on my horrid total now :)

Welcome everyone! :thumbsup:

I was proud to be at that party :)

Ermy ofc His maxed party this morning was nothing short of inspiring

The only thing I dont like is that I could never pull this off :( Maybe when i get max melee ill do some boxing :/

:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

TELEPORT LAG FIXED WOOHOOOOOOOOO

errbody up in here readin

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Jennifer Aniston was amazingggggg before the nose job. I love Friends :D

Animal what are the reqs for your corp clan. Im somewhat interested!

isnt hon free now? Iv been hearing rumors