Granted, but that irregular pattern also applies to your body; you die because of the health problems that resulted from it.

 

I wish I was a master of flawless manipulation.

Granted but you accidently push the big red button and it becomes flawed.

 

I wish that I was a better modder.

Granted. Unfortunately, you are accused of backseat modding due to lack of rank and are never given that authority.

 

I wish I could make any sweets spawn in my hand at will.

Granted but they are all sugar free diabetic versions.

 

I wish I was a lieutenant in Lokie's grand diabolical plans.

Granted, but you're my little puppet king just to redirect where my enemies will fire their guns.

 

I wish I had single-most control over what words can and cannot be in the dictionary.

Granted, but a lot of people try to get you for having that ability, and they stop at nothing to get you.

 

I wish everybody would replace their cars with a helicopter and the costs for helicopters would become the same as the costs for cars. And by costs, I mean the gas, insurance, etc.

Granted. It sucks you didn't include licenses and pilot training in that.

 

I wish I had an IQ of 400.

Granted but it is an IQ of -400.

 

I wish I had better internet.

Granted, but it's only one tier better than the terrible internet you have now.

 

I wish I could scam God.

Granted but the devil doesn't buy it.

 

I wish that I was awesome at Modern Warfare 3

Granted, you get sucked into the game, literally, and never get out.

 

I wish to live at the four corners of the world.

Granted. Drawn and quartered by The Four Horsemen.

 

I wish holding down shift didn't activate that thing that makes the keys enter weirdly.

Granted the sticky keys function is removed.

 

I wish school started latter.

Granted, but it's run by Grammar Nazis.

 

I wish there were no misogynists.

Regarding the technical...

I wish holding down shift didn't activate that thing that makes the keys enter weirdly.

Accessibility Options, dude... Go poke your nose into them if you're having an issue, seeing as they're a per-user thing. Unless you're sharing a single ID with multiple other people, in which case you've got a bit of an issue there. :-?

 

 

Regarding the post I should be answering...

I wish there were no misogynists.

Granted, but while it results in the end of non-straight males, a bunch of women are also vaporized out of existence for hating their own gender. Sadly, one of them was the woman you happened to really like/love. :(

 

(BTW, before you flame me, I'm joking around a bit there, and only for the purposes of this thread. I would not actually want that to happen to you.)

 

 

 

Let's see... next wish... :-k

 

I wish my birthday plans would stop getting annoyingly hijacked. <.<

 

 

~D. V. "Yeah, that just happened to me 28 hours ago." Devnull

Granted but now everyone wants to go to your birthday because it is so awesome.

 

I wish that my school started later or that I needed less sleep.

Granted, your school starts a second later, it's almost unnoticeable.

 

I wish I'll never do drugs. Ever.

Granted, but caffeine is a drug, so you can't drink coffee. Eventually you get so tired from the lack of your morning cup of coffee that you crash your car.

I don't even drink coffee. Wait, caffeine is also in coca-cola isn't it?

 

I wish for a jet pack.

I don't even drink coffee. Wait, caffeine is also in coca-cola isn't it?

 

I wish for a jet pack.

 

Granted, but you fly up really high with it, and it runs out of power.

I wish I could freeze and unfreeze time at will just by snapping my fingers.

Granted, but it backfires and freezes your timestream instead. :(

 

 

BTW, seeing as 'turtle drink' just caused a gap... <*plasters 'turtle drink' with a can of red paint*> :angry:

 

 

Now, I wish I would not ever get too warm or too cold ever again. I'm sick and tired of both heat exhaustion and feeling seriously chilled. <_<

 

 

~D. V. "Problems-a-plenty..." Devnull

Granted, but you accidently spill hot water all over your body and don't realise you are burning so you end up really screwed up looking and afraid of water...

 

I wish that I could control the temperature around me.

@D_V_Devnull *washes off red paint*

sorry

 

@bonez899

 

Granted but you go to sleep and have a dream about it being extremely cold. When you wake up you realise your room is extremely cold and you are frozen to your bed.

 

I wish I could have a chaotic rapier.

Granted, it's 0% charged.

 

I wish for unlimited continues in real life.