Imagine:

 

 

 

You are Male - 16 and cycling home from School, approaching a red light you slow and come to rest at the junction, settling back you take your hands off the handle-bars and sit; waiting for the light to change. A car pulls up to your side, a young girl, maybe 4 or 5 is in the front seat and see's you, she smiles and waves. What do you do?

 

 

 

I, waved. I, smiled. Then got scowled at by the driver - a middle age woman, and the girl cautioned. Why? Am I a paedophile? Even if I was would I be exhibiting a paedophilic nature by waving and smiling back at someone who did that to me?

 

 

 

Is our society such that we must now neglect common curtesy to avoid paedophilic accusation. Can a 16 year old even BE a paedophile? Am i that different to 6 months ago? 2 years ago?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I dunno, was just slightly annoyed at her reaction.

I think you're making an assumption that the scowl you received was an indication that the mother thought you were a pedophile. I know many parents who don't like their kids making contact with strangers not because they are afraid their child will be sexually abused, but because they don't trust strangers.

 

 

 

Do I think it's ridiculous? Yes. Do I think you were just be courtesy and the mom should have been happy that someone was being nice to their kid? Yes. But do I think the mom was thinking you are a pedophile? Not likely.

id probably wave back, but where i live the driver would probably smile at me lol

Its just one overprotective parent.

 

 

 

Don't worry about it.

We live in such an uptight society. #-o

 

 

 

I always smile back kindly to little kids that do that to me. Mostly in checkout lines at stores, the parents don't seem to mind. Just don't be overly friendly. It's easier for a female to get away with this. And I believe you have to be 18 to be a pedophile.

I think you're making an assumption that the scowl you received was an indication that the mother thought you were a pedophile. I know many parents who don't like their kids making contact with strangers not because they are afraid their child will be sexually abused, but because they don't trust strangers.

 

 

 

Do I think it's ridiculous? Yes. Do I think you were just be courtesy and the mom should have been happy that someone was being nice to their kid? Yes. But do I think the mom was thinking you are a pedophile? Not likely.

 

 

 

So the fact that I was a guy had nothing to do with it? if a middle aged woman did it to her would the mother react the same way?

Smile and be happy, wave to everybody. If an old upset woman looks at you severely, smile at her as well.

I think you're making an assumption that the scowl you received was an indication that the mother thought you were a pedophile. I know many parents who don't like their kids making contact with strangers not because they are afraid their child will be sexually abused, but because they don't trust strangers.

 

 

 

Do I think it's ridiculous? Yes. Do I think you were just be courtesy and the mom should have been happy that someone was being nice to their kid? Yes. But do I think the mom was thinking you are a pedophile? Not likely.

 

 

 

So the fact that I was a guy had nothing to do with it? if a middle aged woman did it to her would the mother react the same way?

 

 

 

No, it was because you are a teenager she doesn't know. She might also view guys as more unfriendly than girls - she might be a sexist, I don't know. But I think it's highly unlikely she thought you were going to sexually abuse her daughter.

 

 

 

Didn't you ever hear "Don't talk to strangers" growing up? This parent is clearly a strong believer of that - but I think you have absolutely no reason to believe she was assuming you are a pedophile.

I think you're making an assumption that the scowl you received was an indication that the mother thought you were a pedophile. I know many parents who don't like their kids making contact with strangers not because they are afraid their child will be sexually abused, but because they don't trust strangers.

 

 

 

Do I think it's ridiculous? Yes. Do I think you were just be courtesy and the mom should have been happy that someone was being nice to their kid? Yes. But do I think the mom was thinking you are a pedophile? Not likely.

 

 

 

So the fact that I was a guy had nothing to do with it? if a middle aged woman did it to her would the mother react the same way?

 

 

 

No, it was because you are a teenager she doesn't know. She might also view guys as more unfriendly than girls - she might be a sexist, I don't know. But I think it's highly unlikely she thought you were going to sexually abuse her daughter.

 

 

 

Didn't you ever hear "Don't talk to strangers" growing up? This parent is clearly a strong believer of that - but I think you have absolutely no reason to believe she was assuming you are a pedophile.

 

 

 

Mmm I guess, just felt like she was accusing me of being one when she glared at me ;S even I am doing what I find wrong with society today ;p paranoid about Paedophiles ;\.

To be honest, I doubt she thought you would be a pedophile, and like Ghost said it's probably more likely she just wouldn't trust you being a teenage boy, with which there are lots of stereotypes about.

 

 

 

Do I think it's ridiculous? Yeah of course, why people think that by replaceing general friendliness with paranoia about anyone you don't know does anyone any good I don't know.

Every kid who's ever done that to me and the other half on the bus we just laugh at and pull faces at and their mum always smiles.

 

God knows what the parent in your case was thinking but they're gonna grow up with one antisocial kid if they can't wave to someone friendly.

Well, um, I'm 12 and a girl, I smile/wave at all kids, sometimes I give them conkers or other cool things, even when I don't know them. I always get a good reaction, a cool chat, and the kids and parents sex doesn't really matter. But if I was a guy, I dunno, they might act differently. I dunno lol. :-k

Don't worry about it. I think a lot of teenagers are moody lil buggers, and so people are taken aback sometimes when teenagers like you and me do actually respond in a decent manner.

 

 

 

I work as a lifeguard, and kids are always smiling and waving at me, and whilst we haven't been told that we are not allowed to wave back, the reaction we get from parents when we do is generally negative and one of disgust. If they don't trust us to even wave at their kid, do they trust us to save their life? I mean really, is a lifeguard going to go through tough training and tests to get the job, maintain that training whilst they work, go through CRB checks and actually do the job (which is not a nice one I can tell you!) just to perv at little kids?

 

 

 

The gulf between the sociable adult world and well mannered teenagers has never been wider.

I would of glared in disgust at the woman. :shock:

I often pull stupid faces or stick my tongue out at kids who show interest in me and I've not had such an experience. I think you just happened upon a mum who is a bit of a sourpuss.

Ya, that lady's just uptight. Whenever I'm at the mall or a park I'll always get random little kids saying hi to me, and then running away to their parents. It's almost like a game to them. "Look at me, I talked to a stranger" +2 gutsy

i would have smiled and waved back too.

 

so what, let the mom be a mom

It depends though...on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the creepiest, how creepy would you rate your smile. Me personally, I feel I'm about a 4 maybe 5 so I try not to combine my smile with a wave or any body movement in the direction of the child. If you're above a 6 it's probably in your best interest to not make eye contact with children. If you're a 3 or lower, you could probably even get away with touching them.

Is it possible the woman didn't see her daughter wave and smile to you first?

Just like Viktor said, I think that the mother simply didn't see her child wave at you first and just saw you wave at the kid. In that case, I guess she could have gotten paranoid about it.

 

 

 

Don't read too much into it.

Juat ran into the wrong person is all, some people are just very paranoid, plus the media makes everybody want to think that your a pedaphile and unfortunatly most people listen to the media :shame:

pretty scary that people cant ever trust eachother at all nowdays. Societies cant properly last like that for long.

i would do the same or just smile at them, as for the mother idk lol :D

I would have done the same. I find that the best thing to do in that situation is to act friendly, and the best thing to do if a child is particularly imaginative and wants you to "join in" is to humor them (but not let it get out of hand).

You just get over it. Besides your 16 what are you doing on a bike. Get a car lol.