TTanT

Do NOT under any circumstances let a person wearing sneakers spar you while you are barefoot. My shins have welts, and almost got my foot broken (he kicked my foot). This is why instructors need to enforce rules like "no shoes".

A lot of Off-Topic is either in their late teens or twenties at this point, so I figure we must all have some stories to share. Whether they're stupid things you did as a kid, triumphant tales of comeuppance, or rants about things that sucked- they're all pretty fun to share. So tell me about that time you wrestled a grizzly bear, punched a nun, or singlehandedly caused the current recession through a silly of zany mistakes! A story of mine: Back in my sophomore year of high school, I was at a friend's summer party and we were playing around with a beach ball. Being uncoordinated I knocked it over the fence into the neighbor's yard. So, of course, I immediately jumped the fence to get it- not realizing said neighbor had a rather vicious dog. I managed to get the ball and escape, but it was a pretty close call.

Oi we aren't dead yet! We've only got, like, one foot in the grave!

That's obviously CGI.

^Liar. I have very flexible arms/shoulders and most people have trouble have trouble making me feel pain with an arm lock (I need to be pushed a lot further than most).

I'm playing hardcore superflat mode and am in the process of building a massive wooden castle that I've already spent over five hours on. This is going to end in tears when I [bleep] up and get killed by a creeper.

I'm probably going to become an officer of my University's chess club next semester, which is pretty sweet judging that I'll only be a sophomore. Also I think I'm finally starting to get a bit more comfortable with this "interacting with people to befriend them and not be a social hermit" thing. Still not fully comfortable with it but I'm good enough that I think that will come naturally with time at this point. Meanwhile, a close friend of mine has managed to entangle himself in the most soap-opera worthy love quadrangle I've seen in a while. [hide=It's a long story] He's currently "on a break" from his on-again off-again boyfriend who lives somewhere in the Netherlands (it's a long-distance relationship) and the agreement is that they can both see other people, but both won't due to fear of jealousy. Meanwhile, he has a mutual crush on his roommate so there is constant sexual tension in his house. His roommate is currently trying to get in bed with some girl, however (who seems interested but he's apparently absolutely terrible at hitting on people). My friend also ended up stalking through his roommate's Facebook messages (needless to say, my friend isn't exactly an innocent party here with his lack of respect for privacy) and found several gems including this: "if you want to have sex i can get my friend to let us use his bed" I've never heard a classier pickup line than "we can do it on my roommate's bed because my room is too dirty". I reminded him how creepy going through his friend's messages is, but I'm not going to deny that this is entertaining as hell. Not sure whether I'm being smart for avoiding the drama or a terrible friend for enjoying what is obviously a ticking bomb of angst and drama. Either way, this is way better than any soap opera. [/hide]

I know english, ingles, anglisht, الإنجليزية, anglais, 英語, 英語, and saesneg.

Coming soon to this topic: "How do I deal with rape charges?" "Can she really press charges for me touching her while she slept?" "When she woke up I tried rubbing her back and pulling her hair but it didn't work. What went wrong?"

^Yeah but last time I tried a sick skateboard jump I broke my ankle and cried for three hours straight. It completely ruined my street cred.

Great comeback to the lock and key metaphor I ran across once: A sharpener that sharpens a ton of pencils is a good sharpener. A pencil that you have to always sharpen is a crappy pencil.

Hey, I can do the Vulcan sign with both hands, as well! I can fit my entire fist in my mouth. This really impressed my friends in elementary school but once we hit puberty it just lead to gay jokes. I can also make it under a limbo bar that's at knee height. I'm actually kind of proud of that one as I've beaten kids who were half my height at limbo due to it.

I don't know what you're talking about. Also, sore shins. They're a common consequence of sparring but jeez do they suck sometimes.

^Here's another one then. First hold your breath for sixty seconds (or as long as you can) then read the hide tags. Don't read them until after, though. [hide] No seriously don't read them until after. [hide] Are you sure you've already held your breath? [hide] If you haven't held your breath yet I am very disappointed in you. [hide] If you still haven't you are a pathetic excuse for a human being. [hide] If you have I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but if you haven't you suck. [hide] Those people who haven't are the reason those who have have to deal with this. [hide] Seriously, hold your breath. [hide] How's being breathless? :grin: [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide][/hide]

You guys have ruined bananas for me. By the way, who else remembers when everyone was putting "you are now manually breathing/swallowing/noticing itches" in their signatures? Because that drove me up the wall as it literally made me cease to function at the time. ...On a related note if you make a fist you might notice that your ring finger squeezes up against your middle finger and that no matter what you do it always rubs it annoyingly.

^I'm in the process of perfecting my "Naughty Jinx" costume just for that purpose. In other news my laptop's power cord has reached that point of only working when plugged in at specific angles. Time to scour the internet for a new one.

I'll bet you use that trick to seduce women. Personally my useless talents include: -Whistling and humming simultaneously -Reciting Lucky's Speech from Waiting for Godot by memory -Cutting a deck with one hand Nothing too interesting, unfortunately.

So one Youtube adventure through funny Nichijou clips later and I kind of want to watch the series.

How did you guys figure it out so quickly, though? In other news I'm trying to put together the money to go to my first out-of-state convention with a few friends. It should be fun if I can afford it.

Why not all of them? :wink:

I got a friend's number and decided to send them several creepy texts without actually revealing who I was. But I accidentally put in the wrong number. Oops.

Internet drama. Why can't we all just be friends? Is it me? Did I do something wrong? I'm sorry! I'll do better! J-just... stop fighting!

Anyone of any religion (or lack of religion) who looks down on others for not agreeing with them is an arse. And if you disagree with me about that you're so dumb I feel sorry for you. I hope everyone realizes that was sarcasm

Fate/Zero and Mirai Nikki are both really solid animes. The first for the Urobutcher's evil combined with some of the best fight scenes I've ever seen and a solid plot, and the second for a horrifying plot and the biggest yandere ever. Brotherhood is also awesome but at 60+ episodes you might want to finish a few shorter ones before you get into it. It's a pretty big commitment (although certainly worth it). I'm about to start Elfen Lied, which I was foolish enough to start watching on campus a few days ago. Cue starting nude scene and me minimizing my browser very quickly (luckily no-one was behind me at that moment). Oh and I recently watched Kokoro Connect and it was surprisingly good. Fairly light in tone, but it still managed to hit some emotional chords. It's a shame they never bothered explaining that Heartseed fellow's motivations at all.

And this is why I'm terrified to screw with my OS. I'm afraid Windows will smite all of my files out of spite.