-post-

 

That must of taken a lot of courage. Props to you, my friend.

 

I believe it takes a considerable amount of courage.

 

 

Also, sad news for me today. :(

 

On my facebook news feed my ex is now dating the guy she met and grew attached for. Is it wrong that I want to take time to distance myself because its painful for me? I wont stand for her wanting to keep me in her life while I have to sit there and watch her be happy in someone elses arms. Is this mature/ immature?

 

Am I doing the right thing?

 

Don't worry about being mature right now, as long as neither you nor her is up in each other's faces with their relationship business, you're both handling it alright. If avoiding her will make you feel better, than do it. I didn't talk to my ex for months when i was in this situation, which gave us plenty to catch up on and talk about later when we got back together. Don't let her actions dictate your life. Turn a blind eye to her and live on man.

 

 

 

 

@Realize

 

Hell of a story man, crazy ex's will certainly change you. I'm wondering what the correlation is between being in long term relationships and becoming depressed/anxious. It also seems to be a more common phenomenon in girls. I'm not trying to be sexist, it's just what I've noticed.

I think the bad thing, I had a few Ex's like that (not as serious, but very consistent) which sadly destroyed every ounce of personality I have. Which is why I'm im QLD, to actually rebuild my personality, to not feel ugly and gain self confidence.

 

Sadly, I'm still trying :<

-post-

 

That must of taken a lot of courage. Props to you, my friend.

 

I believe it takes a considerable amount of courage.

 

 

Also, sad news for me today. :(

 

On my facebook news feed my ex is now dating the guy she met and grew attached for. Is it wrong that I want to take time to distance myself because its painful for me? I wont stand for her wanting to keep me in her life while I have to sit there and watch her be happy in someone elses arms. Is this mature/ immature?

 

Am I doing the right thing?

 

That's not immature at all. If this is over Facebook or something, just block her on your newsfeed. Like RPG said, don't let her actions dictate your life.

It's not immature to separate yourself from your ex. She may see you as a friend, but if she's going to be mentioning this new guy a lot (perhaps not rubbing it in your face, but if she can't realise that it doesn't make you feel good), then you're better off keeping your distance. Not worth the hassle.

Its all so confusing.... My emotions are all over the place these past few days. But RPG Gamer is practicly saving my ass with his advice haha xD

 

She ended up posting like 2 minutes after I posted my lengthy message explaining how I see / feel things. After a small facebook fight, with her trying to explain how she will always be there and how I can call at any time if I need her, I left it with a "if you really care at all you can call me"

 

Instant phone call :shock:

It was umm.... reassuring? I mean I wasnt expecting a call at all. And I get called instantly...

 

Also, longest phone call ever o.o

3 hour marathon call haha. Biggest heart to heart conversation I'v ever had... its just bleeeeeeeeeeeeegh. We just get along so well and I refuse to let that go down. Im still going to be her friend, because she explained to me she needs time to live and have fun and if shes still in this mindset while dating this guy that means he has no chance of getting what I want. We talked a lot about things like that. Like when she would feel that when she would think what age she wants to settle down... Thankfully its actually something reasonable now...

 

Its time for me and her to live our own lives. But im confident that when she finally settles down and wants to look for something serious, shes going to open her eyes and Im the one thats going to be standing there. And im going to stand there and smile.

Its all so confusing.... My emotions are all over the place these past few days. But RPG Gamer is practicly saving my ass with his advice haha xD

 

She ended up posting like 2 minutes after I posted my lengthy message explaining how I see / feel things. After a small facebook fight, with her trying to explain how she will always be there and how I can call at any time if I need her, I left it with a "if you really care at all you can call me"

 

Instant phone call :shock:

It was umm.... reassuring? I mean I wasnt expecting a call at all. And I get called instantly...

 

Also, longest phone call ever o.o

3 hour marathon call haha. Biggest heart to heart conversation I'v ever had... its just bleeeeeeeeeeeeegh. We just get along so well and I refuse to let that go down. Im still going to be her friend, because she explained to me she needs time to live and have fun and if shes still in this mindset while dating this guy that means he has no chance of getting what I want. We talked a lot about things like that. Like when she would feel that when she would think what age she wants to settle down... Thankfully its actually something reasonable now...

 

Its time for me and her to live our own lives. But im confident that when she finally settles down and wants to look for something serious, shes going to open her eyes and Im the one thats going to be standing there. And im going to stand there and smile.

 

damn straight bro

To women: Are you able to have sex on a biweekly basis with a guy you aren't dating without having feelings for him?

To women: Are you able to have sex on a biweekly basis with a guy you aren't dating without having feelings for him?

 

>>expects a wide range of female views on a runescape fansite

 

 

some girls absolutely can. Some girls absolutely can't.

Yeah, whenever a girl shows up around here we tend to tineye her pics to make sure she's a girl.

Yeah, whenever a girl shows up around here we tend to tineye her pics to make sure she's a girl.

Did someone say girl? Pics?

To women: Are you able to have sex on a biweekly basis with a guy you aren't dating without having feelings for him?

some girls absolutely can. Some girls absolutely can't.

Pretty much this :P It's the same as guys really. Some guys can, some guys can't. Exactly the same for girls.

To women: Are you able to have sex on a biweekly basis with a guy you aren't dating without having feelings for him?

some girls absolutely can. Some girls absolutely can't.

Pretty much this :P It's the same as guys really. Some guys can, some guys can't. Exactly the same for girls.

Exactly what i was thinking the second i read the post.

The question is still worth asking if enough girls reply, especially if Realize is familiar with their personalities (i.e. if all/most/few/none girls similar to the one in his problem say "yes", odds are/aren't on his side).

I would have thought that on average girls would tend to be more emotional and likely to get attached than guys....but that's pure speculation.

I would have thought that on average girls would tend to be more emotional and likely to get attached than guys....but that's pure speculation.

 

 

I can say firsthand that Im an argument against your speculation. The way I view relationship are totally 100% serious and at the age of 19 thats only going to lead to heartbreak.

But im confident that when she finally settles down and wants to look for something serious, shes going to open her eyes and Im the one thats going to be standing there. And im going to stand there and smile.

I wouldn't recommend this Disney way of thinking. She is telling you she is attracted to another guy, how much clearer can she be?

It's time to move on.

 

As for no girls wanting a serious relationship at 19, that's far from true.

This may sound harsh, but keeping the girl attracted and interested in you is the problem. Blaming them won't fix anything.

 

Be honest with yourself and think about the real reasons why you want something serious. It seems like you want something serious for the sake of it, not because of a particular girl, which imo can only stem from bad reasons.

 

Rather than talk to girls with the intention of having a serious relationship, why not do so because it's fun? If it develops into attraction, sex and then a relationship then it's a bonus.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. And many people, like you, have told me similar to the same thing, that I might be crazy, that hoping and praying for a happy ending is the wrong way to go, to move on, blah blah blah.

 

She has told me that shes not at the point where she wants to settle down and look for a serious relationship, and the reason we broke up is that we were getting too close to that point. So if shes with this new guy, what big deal is he to me? She told me its going to be a good 3 years before she wants to look for something that has the potential that we had.

 

I dont know whats going to happen in the future. So the fact that I'v already set sail and having one clear focus on what I want is indeed foolhardy. For all I know I could be sailing to my inevitable doom.

 

These feelings I have for her... are not what you described. Iv felt that before. Where I want the idea of a relationship and not the girl. This is different. This is something I cant describe with words, actions, anything. And the only way for you to understand the way I feel is for you to be me. This is unlike anything I'v ever felt before. And shes the one who gives me this feeling.

 

Theres been too many times in my past where Iv let good things slip through my fingers. Not this time.

But im confident that when she finally settles down and wants to look for something serious, shes going to open her eyes and Im the one thats going to be standing there. And im going to stand there and smile.

I wouldn't recommend this Disney way of thinking. She is telling you she is attracted to another guy, how much clearer can she be?

It's time to move on.

 

As for no girls wanting a serious relationship at 19, that's far from true.

This may sound harsh, but keeping the girl attracted and interested in you is the problem. Blaming them won't fix anything.

 

Be honest with yourself and think about the real reasons why you want something serious. It seems like you want something serious for the sake of it, not because of a particular girl, which imo can only stem from bad reasons.

 

Rather than talk to girls with the intention of having a serious relationship, why not do so because it's fun? If it develops into attraction, sex and then a relationship then it's a bonus.

 

I told him to find purpose, not to wait around until said girl is done with said guy and then pounce like a jack rabbit lol

She has told me that shes not at the point where she wants to settle down and look for a serious relationship, and the reason we broke up is that we were getting too close to that point.

This is a women, she doesn't think the same way you do. When she said that she could mean you were suffocating her or a number of other things.

 

A women who wants a 1 night stand with a guy will agree to go back to his house to check out his fish. That way, whatever else may happen isn't her fault because she went to check out the fish and not have sex.

 

What I'm trying to say, is a women will tend to make an emotional choice and use whatever logic will fit to justify it. I'm not saying it's wrong, but it's not how men work so many don't get it.

 

I've seen many guys piss off their girlfriends and get into easily avoided fights because they listen to the logic and reasoning, and don't think about core values and emotions she has.

 

So if shes with this new guy, what big deal is he to me? She told me its going to be a good 3 years before she wants to look for something that has the potential that we had.

She says that because she didn't want a serious relationship with you at this time. This doesn't mean she doesn't want one for 3 years full stop. If her and this new guy click, they may very well end up together.

 

My girlfriend told herself she wouldn't get into a relationship, or have sex until later on based on her experiences with guys. Just months later I met her and she changed her mind.

 

I was having a casual thing with a girl for months, (who was originally 'against that')and she had long pushed out her feelings for me because I didn't want a relationship. I started developing feelings for her, she wasn't interested in a serious relationship. Less than a month later, she started dating another guy and it got serious.

 

Things like that happen all the time. At least keep that in mind.

 

Theres been too many times in my past where Iv let good things slip through my fingers. Not this time.

 

Every time you let a women walk past you without talking to her, you're doing the same thing. Every one is a missed experience and opportunity, whether you would have been shot down by her or married her.

 

 

I've been with my girlfriend a whole year now o.O

 

Living together a lot of that time and no fights or anything.

 

Living together a lot of that time and no fights or anything.

Didn't you two start off as [bleep]-buddies though? I know one friend's GF was his [bleep] buddy, they've been dating for about 2 years now. Personally I think they're more likely to connect because they already trust one another and what not already.

 

 

SOOOO Women of Australia, stop getting knocked up at 18, I'm not going to father your jerk-of-a-Ex's child because you made a wrong decision. (of dating him. before anyone jumps on the "it's her child's right" bandwagon)

Its fine to say "never give up" and "keep chasing your dreams" but the more time I spend talking big, the less I get done. Ill press that handful of courage against my heart, and it will help survive another day. And I'll never take that for granted.

 

Living together a lot of that time and no fights or anything.

Didn't you two start off as [bleep]-buddies though?

Nah that would have been a different girl, we were physical before we got together but never decided on being casual. I just went along to see how things worked out and she ended up being an amazing girl.

 

By the way if we don't hang soon I'm going to have to start cheating on you.

 

Living together a lot of that time and no fights or anything.

Didn't you two start off as [bleep]-buddies though?

Nah that would have been a different girl, we were physical before we got together but never decided on being casual. I just went along to see how things worked out and she ended up being an amazing girl.

 

By the way if we don't hang soon I'm going to have to start cheating on you.

;___;

Sometime tomorrow? Doing a [bleep]-ton of housework today and trying to get over this heat-rash/sunburn thing that makes me face look like I'm shedding. |:

makes me face look like I'm shedding. |:

 

that's attractive

 

Living together a lot of that time and no fights or anything.

Didn't you two start off as [bleep]-buddies though?

Nah that would have been a different girl, we were physical before we got together but never decided on being casual. I just went along to see how things worked out and she ended up being an amazing girl.

 

By the way if we don't hang soon I'm going to have to start cheating on you.

;___;

Sometime tomorrow? Doing a [bleep]-ton of housework today and trying to get over this heat-rash/sunburn thing that makes me face look like I'm shedding. |:

 

Oh, so when Tim goes to Brisbane you guys want to hang... But when Jeff comes Dan and Jimmy are too busy. Rude.

 

 

Hahaha :shades: