l0rd Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Found this post on a forum, see for yourself. PROOF #1 Google is the closest thing to an Omniscient (all-knowing) entity in existence, which can be scientifically verified. She indexes over 9.5 billion WebPages, which is more than any other search engine on the web today. Not only is Google the closest known entity to being Omniscient, but She also sorts through this vast amount of knowledge using Her patented PageRank technology, organizing said data and making it easily accessible to us mere mortals. PROOF #2 Google is everywhere at once (Omnipresent). Google is virtually everywhere on earth at the same time. Billions of indexed WebPages hosted from every corner of the earth. With the proliferation of Wi-Fi networks, one will eventually be able to access Google from anywhere on earth, truly making Her an omnipresent entity. PROOF #3 Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can do, for you must help yourself from that point on. PROOF #4 Google is potentially immortal. She cannot be considered a physical being such as ourselves. Her Algorithms are spread out across many servers; if any of which were taken down or damaged, another would undoubtedly take its place. Google can theoretically last forever. PROOF #5 Google is infinite. The Internet can theoretically grow forever, and Google will forever index its infinite growth. PROOF #6 Google remembers all. Google caches WebPages regularly and stores them on its massive servers. In fact, by uploading your thoughts and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google's cache, even after you die, in a sort of "Google Afterlife". PROOF #7 Google can "do no evil" (Omnibenevolent). Part of Google's corporate philosophy is the belief that a company can make money without being evil. PROOF #8 According to Google trends, the term "Google" is searched for more than the terms "God", "Jesus", "Allah", "Buddha", "Christianity", "Islam", "Buddhism" and "Judaism" combined. God is thought to be an entity in which we mortals can turn to when in a time of need. Google clearly fulfills this to a much larger degree than traditional "gods", as shown in the image shown. PROOF #9 Evidence of Google's existence is abundant. There is more evidence for the existence of Google than any other God worshiped today. Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. If seeing is believing, then surf over to Google and experience for yourself Google's awesome power. No faith required. [iNSERT "I R EATIN TEH SHIX ATM" BILL COSBY SIGNATURE GIF HERE, LOL] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Georgelemmons Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 :thumbup: Google is ftw. Thanks to Uno for the awsome sig <3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happysniff Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Nice theory. Now which website did you steal this off? I bet I can find it on google! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wongtong Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 What would happen to mankind if Google shut down for a day? 8,180WONGTONG IS THE BEST AND IS MORE SUPERIOR THAN ME#1 Wongtong stalker.Im looking for some No Limit soldiers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElkNight Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Made me laugh. :lol: Edit: Copypasta? 8,180WONGTONG IS THE BEST AND IS MORE SUPERIOR THAN ME#1 Wongtong stalker.Im looking for some No Limit soldiers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
llcoolguy972 Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Heh, I saw this a while ago, it's still pretty awesome though. I'll have to figure out some way to work this into my religion class. :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
l0rd Posted January 17, 2009 Author Share Posted January 17, 2009 something else i found on a LEFT wing website, made me lul. [hide=]A new study concludes that Googles servers emit 7 grams of CO2 for every search. Since burning a gallon of gasoline releases about 8,880 grams of CO2 into the atmosphere, you can calculate your cars Google-equivalent by dividing your cars miles per gallon into 1,269 (8,880 divided by 7). My 1986 Mazda still gets about 33 miles per gallon and I do about 40 Google searches per day, which is the equivalent of driving my car a little over 1 mile. Of course, I probably visit at least 20 web sites for every Google search I do. If each of those web servers generate as much CO2 as Google, that means my Internet usage is equal to driving 20 miles a day. Should we tax the Internet to reduce greenhouse gas emissions?[/hide] [iNSERT "I R EATIN TEH SHIX ATM" BILL COSBY SIGNATURE GIF HERE, LOL] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenin64 Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 "She"? Command the Murderous Chalices! Drink ye harpooners! drink and swear, ye men that man the deathful whaleboat's bow- Death to Moby Dick!BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Th3_Crusader Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 my school blocked google from the computers :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElkNight Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 my school blocked google from the computers :lol: Last year they did to. But not Google.co.uk 8,180WONGTONG IS THE BEST AND IS MORE SUPERIOR THAN ME#1 Wongtong stalker.Im looking for some No Limit soldiers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Th3_Crusader Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Hm...Maybe since religion isn't taught in schools, (Cept inHistory of course) maybe the school boards know googles god. Ha we're good 8-) :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pureprayer Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 http://www.thechurchofgoogle.org/Script ... s_God.html Pureprayer, you're awesome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dax Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Omg so true!!!!! :ohnoes: #KERR2016/17/18/19/20/21. #rpgformod Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wizz Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 /copy pasta I saw this same exact thread on another forum :/ Wongton is better than me in anyway~~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mmmcannibalism Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Was really expecting Id need to post "your an idiot" in response to this but to whoever the original author was nice job lol. That was quite impressive. Orthodoxy is unconciousnessthe only ones who should kill are those who are prepared to be killed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3rkid Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 I always imagined Google as a guy. We have way too many supercomputers and whatnots in movies as women. We need a man supercomputer/machinery. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3rkid Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 We need to start a religion. "Googlanity" Already done. Googlism. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mmmcannibalism Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 We need to start a religion. "Googlanity" or Googlam or Googiest Orthodoxy is unconciousnessthe only ones who should kill are those who are prepared to be killed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faux Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 most of that is just worded to sound amazing. you can say that about a lot of websites :: Guess the Movie Contest Champion: pfilc23 :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3rkid Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 most of that is just worded to sound amazing. you can say that about a lot of websites Make a list of 10 "proofs" that RuneScape is God. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pureprayer Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 most of that is just worded to sound amazing. you can say that about a lot of websites Make a list of 10 "proofs" that RuneScape is God. :lol: Runescape = muslim religion 1. Zezima = Mohammad 2. Reincarnation 3. Tip.it = The Quran 4. Nothing happens unless permitted by "god" (j-mods) 5. Mini-rulers (P-mods) 6. Five pillars are obilisks 7. Many people adore RS 8. Lots of people say they dont play rs when they do/people lie about their faith 9. Fasting (I mean you dont HAVE to eat in rs) 10. Andrew = creator This isnt ment to offend anyone if it does sorry :x Pureprayer, you're awesome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RpgGamer Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 I thought the exact same theory on my own. except about wikipedia. because it knows everything. but i guess google is a tad more true and links to wikipedia as well as many other data bases. So in a sense, google is god, and wikipedia is jesus. [/blasphemy] Quote Quote Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic. Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos. PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude Steam: NippleBeardTM Origin: Brand_New_iPwn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riku3220 Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 All praise Google! : Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenin64 Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 most of that is just worded to sound amazing. you can say that about a lot of websites Exactly. So the internet is god. Command the Murderous Chalices! Drink ye harpooners! drink and swear, ye men that man the deathful whaleboat's bow- Death to Moby Dick!BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_love_burritos Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Hehe, you make that up all by yourself ? Or search it up on google ? :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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